The Dumb And The Senseless
Chapter Six~ Precious and Oprah
Disclaimer: I do not own Trigun, I do not want to talk about it anymore, I'm too depressed. Oh and I don't own Oscar Mayer, Lord Of The Rings or Oprah.
*Knives is still singing in the shower while Vash, Me, and Wolfwood are sitting in the living room with their ears covered*
Knives: MY BOLOGNA HAS A FIRST NAME IT'S O-S-C-A-R!! MY BOLOGNA HAS A SECOND NAME IT'S M-A-Y-E-R!! AND IF YOU ASK ME WHY, I'LL SAY!! CAUSE OSCAR MAYER HAS A WAY WITH B-O-L-O-G-N-A!!!!!!!!!!!
Wolfwood: *eyes roll back in his head* MY EARS THEY BURN!!!! THEY BURN!!! *falls on the floor twitching*
Vash: *stares at him* Dude…? *pokes him*
Me: *somehow got out of her strait jacket* THAT'S IT!!!!! *stomps up the stairs*
Vash: Me wait don't go up there!
*upstairs Me is heard yelling and then a high pitched scream id heard*
Knives: *comes running down the stairs barely dressed and his hair sopping wet* AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: *comes running after him with a piece of paper* YOU SHALL FACE THE TORTURE OF MANY PAPERCUTS!!!!!!!!
Knives: NOT PAPERCUTS!!!!!!!!!! *jumps on Vash's head*
Vash: HEY!!!! GET OFF OF ME!!!!!!
Me: COME BACK HERE!!!!!! *runs towards Vash who grabs the paper from her*
Vash: *tears up the paper* There, no more paper.
Me: *pouts* No fair.
Vash: *pulls Knives off of his head* You really are starting to annoy me Knives.
Knives: *whimpers* Just keep her away from me. She's one evil spider, a she-devil she is.
Me: *grins evilly* I know, hee hee. *runs into a closet*
Wolfwood: *dazed on the floor*
Vash: Why did she go hide in the closet?
Knives: *shrugs* I don't know and I don't care.
Vash: *follows Me* Well I do care. *opens door to see Me hunched over holding something*
Me: *pets whatever is in her hand* They'll never takes you from us Precious, never ever.
Vash: Me?
Me: *looks up and hisses* You stays away from my Precious you hears.
Vash: *sweat drop* Why are you talking like that Me?
Me: Me never tell. *runs away*
Vash: Oh well.
*Three days later*
Me: *grins evilly* MMMMMWWWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Vash: *singing* Bad boys, bad boys…whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?
Me: *crouches down on the ground and puts her arms over her head* OH NO!!!!! The cops have found out what I did!!!!!!
Vash: *sees Me* Me what are you doing?
Me: DON'T HURT ME MISTER OFFICER, I DIDN'T DO IT!!!!!!
Vash: *stares at her* What are you talking about?
Me: *looks up* Oh it's just you Vash, I thought it was the cops.
Vash: *puts his hands on his hips* Me what did you do this time?
Me: *grins* Nothing I swear it.
Vash: *glares at her* Me???!!!!!
Me: *whimpers* OK, OK!!!!!! I DID IT!!!!!!!
Vash: But Me, what did you do?????
Me: *near the point of crying* I…I…I'M THE ONE WHO VIDEOTAPED KNIVES WATCHING OPRAH AND THE SOLD IT FOR A CAN OF STRING CHEESE!!!!!!!
Vash: *sweat drop* Is that all? That wasn't a bad thing.
Me: *sniffle* Really?
Vash: *smiles* Nope it was a good thing! *starts to laugh* Knives watching Oprah, that's something I'd pay to see.
Me: *smiles* Well if you come with me you can see it for free, come on.
*They go to Me's living room where Me puts in a tape and soon an image of Knives watching Oprah appears*
Me: *watches and the tosses a tennis ball in the air and catches it over and over* Isn't it funny?
Knives: Isn't what funny?
*Vash and Me freeze on the spot then slowly turn around to see Knives behind them*
Vash: Nothing is funny.
Knives: *sees what they're watching* AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT FROM!!!!!!??????
Me: Nowhere.
Knives: *glares at both her and Vash who quickly stand up* GGGGGGRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Me: *looks at the tennis ball in her hand and then back at Knives* *throws the ball at Knives head* POKEBALL GO!!!!!!
Knives: Huh? *gets hit with the ball and falls to the floor*
Me: RUN!!!!!!!
*Vash and Me run away but not before grabbing the tape*
Vash: *laughs* That was perfect!
Knives: *gets up and begins to chase them* GET BACK HERE!!!!!
Vash&Me: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Will Knives be turned into a Pokemon? Will Me and Vash get away from him? Will they be able to sell more tapes for more string cheese? Who knows…well I do, but I'm not gonna tell ya, find out in the next chapter of......
THE DUMB AND THE SENSELESS!!!!!