Chpt18: Shadows and Tall Trees.
".Severus.. Severus, wake up." Her rolled over, swatting lightly as she source of the voice blew softly into his ear.
"Wake up, Severus, look, it's morning!"
He grunted, opening his eyes as her lips reached down to softly taste his own.
"Good morning, Heather," his voice grated out roughly, thick with the remnants of sleep.
"It's always a good morning when you're here!" she winked mischievously, and he rolled onto his side, threading his hands through her hair.
"You're amazing, you know that?"
~*~*~*~
Hermione sighed deeply, pouring yet another coffee into her well-worn mug.
Flicking through her calendar, she glared at the date marked "Yule Ball", wishing that there were some way to avoid it.
It was Friday. Again.
Last week, Friday had seemed like the unholiest thing ever created, today, it simply felt like something that would not, could not ever end.
Should not ever begin. ~*~
Double potions.
Gryffindor vs. Slytherin.
Potter vs. Malfoy.
God's Gift vs. Hell's Angels.
Neither for the first, nor the last time, Severus wondered why God took such joy in punishing him so, before finally deciding that the only possible answer to the question could be found on his left forearm.
"Voldemort, you bloody bastard!" He shouted suddenly, grabbing a vial of corrosive potion and throwing it at the wall in rage.
"Quit bloody screwing with me!"
Shaking, he let himself collapse into an armchair, ignoring the innocuous hissing of the potion as it ate into the dungeons' stone walls.
"Quit bloody screwing with me."
Alone, the Potions Master sat, feeling old as he hunched into himself, his head in his hands, trying to regain control.
"It's okay, come, you're alright." The voice was soft in his ear, and he looked up, finding nobody.
Heather Gates.
Who was she? What did she want? Hell, what did he want?
"Leave me alone." He muttered to himself, brushing away the imaginary hand that reached out to comfort him.
"But Severus, you are alone."
He was having delusions. Hallucinations. A mid-life crisis, perhaps? "Dear Gods, help me."
The voice smiled, and although he could not see her, he could feel the idea of her presence.
"I thought that you didn't want to be helped. It's funny, how temperamental you can be, Severus, you really ought to make your mind up."
"Fuck off. You're crazy."
The voice laughed, the soft melody awakening from somewhere deep within his memory. "I'm not the one talking to myself here though, am I?"
Severus snorted. "One of the first signs of madness, or so I'm told, is arguing with yourself - and losing."
The voice smiled again, leaning in to give him a chaste kiss on his forehead.
"You're not crazy, Severus, but fighting a battle is worthless if its goal is unclear."
He glanced around the room again.
"Who are you?"
"You know who I am, Severus, I've been here all along, you just didn't see it, didn't look for me. I've found you though, I've found you, and you just need to find me."
"Who are you?" He stood up, his senses alert.
"You can't lose me, Severus, I'm right here, where I've always been, you just can't see it."
He stepped towards the voice, but instead of bumping into the solid matter that he had expected, the voice seemed to filter more deeply into his skull.
"WHO ARE YOU?"
The voice laughed, not mocking, but gentle, "Why, Severus, I'm you."
~*~*~*~
// Hermione, stop talking to yourself. //
She brushed her hair, not even bothering to try to tame it. She had ten minutes. Ten precious minutes, and then she would have to face him.
Calmly, Crookshanks rubbed against the side of her leg, meowing softly as he petted him.
"Crookshanks, you are so lucky that you don't know who you really are. apart from being a cat."
She picked him up, scrunching her nose up and making faces at him as she hugged him close.
The cat continued to purr for a moment, before deciding that his Mistress had gone cookoo and jumping free from her clasp.
He sat on the bed looking unimpressed, giving her a look that clearly said, "Aren't you late for class?"
"Hmph. Be that way then. Don't even try to deny the fact that you are spoiled silly though, because I will not let you!"
Unwavering, Crookshanks was still extremely unamused.
".Severus.. Severus, wake up." Her rolled over, swatting lightly as she source of the voice blew softly into his ear.
"Wake up, Severus, look, it's morning!"
He grunted, opening his eyes as her lips reached down to softly taste his own.
"Good morning, Heather," his voice grated out roughly, thick with the remnants of sleep.
"It's always a good morning when you're here!" she winked mischievously, and he rolled onto his side, threading his hands through her hair.
"You're amazing, you know that?"
~*~*~*~
Hermione sighed deeply, pouring yet another coffee into her well-worn mug.
Flicking through her calendar, she glared at the date marked "Yule Ball", wishing that there were some way to avoid it.
It was Friday. Again.
Last week, Friday had seemed like the unholiest thing ever created, today, it simply felt like something that would not, could not ever end.
Should not ever begin. ~*~
Double potions.
Gryffindor vs. Slytherin.
Potter vs. Malfoy.
God's Gift vs. Hell's Angels.
Neither for the first, nor the last time, Severus wondered why God took such joy in punishing him so, before finally deciding that the only possible answer to the question could be found on his left forearm.
"Voldemort, you bloody bastard!" He shouted suddenly, grabbing a vial of corrosive potion and throwing it at the wall in rage.
"Quit bloody screwing with me!"
Shaking, he let himself collapse into an armchair, ignoring the innocuous hissing of the potion as it ate into the dungeons' stone walls.
"Quit bloody screwing with me."
Alone, the Potions Master sat, feeling old as he hunched into himself, his head in his hands, trying to regain control.
"It's okay, come, you're alright." The voice was soft in his ear, and he looked up, finding nobody.
Heather Gates.
Who was she? What did she want? Hell, what did he want?
"Leave me alone." He muttered to himself, brushing away the imaginary hand that reached out to comfort him.
"But Severus, you are alone."
He was having delusions. Hallucinations. A mid-life crisis, perhaps? "Dear Gods, help me."
The voice smiled, and although he could not see her, he could feel the idea of her presence.
"I thought that you didn't want to be helped. It's funny, how temperamental you can be, Severus, you really ought to make your mind up."
"Fuck off. You're crazy."
The voice laughed, the soft melody awakening from somewhere deep within his memory. "I'm not the one talking to myself here though, am I?"
Severus snorted. "One of the first signs of madness, or so I'm told, is arguing with yourself - and losing."
The voice smiled again, leaning in to give him a chaste kiss on his forehead.
"You're not crazy, Severus, but fighting a battle is worthless if its goal is unclear."
He glanced around the room again.
"Who are you?"
"You know who I am, Severus, I've been here all along, you just didn't see it, didn't look for me. I've found you though, I've found you, and you just need to find me."
"Who are you?" He stood up, his senses alert.
"You can't lose me, Severus, I'm right here, where I've always been, you just can't see it."
He stepped towards the voice, but instead of bumping into the solid matter that he had expected, the voice seemed to filter more deeply into his skull.
"WHO ARE YOU?"
The voice laughed, not mocking, but gentle, "Why, Severus, I'm you."
~*~*~*~
// Hermione, stop talking to yourself. //
She brushed her hair, not even bothering to try to tame it. She had ten minutes. Ten precious minutes, and then she would have to face him.
Calmly, Crookshanks rubbed against the side of her leg, meowing softly as he petted him.
"Crookshanks, you are so lucky that you don't know who you really are. apart from being a cat."
She picked him up, scrunching her nose up and making faces at him as she hugged him close.
The cat continued to purr for a moment, before deciding that his Mistress had gone cookoo and jumping free from her clasp.
He sat on the bed looking unimpressed, giving her a look that clearly said, "Aren't you late for class?"
"Hmph. Be that way then. Don't even try to deny the fact that you are spoiled silly though, because I will not let you!"
Unwavering, Crookshanks was still extremely unamused.