Chapter Sixteen
Yay! New chapter... I know, I know, I need to get my lazy butt moving with these chapters, and I will. I kicked my Muse out of my room, so he can't visit nearly as often. Sorry. I love the song at the end... It's mostly what inspired the wedding between Harry and Cassandra. Listening to that son at 6:30 AM on a crowded highschool bus filled with smelly, annoying people who claim to by my age... Yeah. Anyway. Enjoy.
Aimée
My mother always said it takes a big man to cry, and an even bigger one to make him do so. I, being a Malfoy and henceforth never shedding a tear over the inevitable, never did quite understand what she meant by that, even if the saying was meant to be humourous. To this day, it does truly take a stronger man than myself to make me cry; no woman has yet succeeded, save my mother, but when does your mother truly count as a woman?
A mother is someone who gave birth to you, someone who, from the moment they first hold you, are devoted to your happiness and potential for your entire existence. A mother is a person you go to talk to when you need someone and have no one else to turn to…
…Which is exactly what I needed the moment Ethan walked out the door, leaving Harry sitting on a sofa, completely flabbergasted and confused as to what had just gone on.
Unfortunately for me, I had been robbed of my mother less than a year ago, and therefore had no one to turn to. She would have been supportive; she would have found me a way through this…
So why wasn't she here to help?
I leaned up against the door to my room, sighing inwardly and staring out the open window. The sky was a dismal shade of gray and rain was beating down on the pane of glass, matching my mood exactly. I heard a muffled sob and had half the notion to walk out of the room to see how Harry was doing, but I then remembered he was the one who got us both into this, and I had nothing to comfort him with.
I closed my eyes, a picture of him and Cassandra the night he announced their engagement emblazed onto my eyelids. It was no longer a picture of Harry as he slept, as was the preferred image I had of him – instead, it was the opposite of all we had stood for, everything we had despised previously.
With a heavy heart, I concentrated on the stone and brick walls of the Malfoy Manor and Disapparated there with an almost inaudible pop, leaving Harry to deal with his own conscience.
The walls of the Malfoy drawing room appeared around me quite suddenly, and with a gust of unexpressed drama, I collapsed into one of the more comfortable, but fading, armchairs, my eyes locking onto the fire that was burning so cheerfully.
I don't know how long I sat in front of the fire, allowing my thoughts to wander from one topic to the next. It seemed like a lifetime later when I felt a hand touch my shoulder, sending shockwaves of surprise through my body and having me turn around so quickly, I nearly fell out of the chair.
"Remus!" I gasped, breathing heavily, "You scared me!"
His tired, amber eyes gazed down at me, hand still placed on my shoulder. He stood there for a moment before moving to one of the armchairs next to the one I was sitting in, collapsing just as I had hours ago.
"Fight with Harry?"
I shook my head, eyes once again locked onto the cheerful orange and blue flames three meters in front of me.
"No, Ethan came over-"
"Ethan? Ethan Snape? Harry's little brother?" Remus' jaw dropped as he leaned forward slightly in his chair, "You're kidding?"
"Wish I was, Dad, but I'm not. Ethan came over and got into an argument with Harry – typical, really, but they were fighting about me."
Remus raised an eyebrow, "You? What about you? Does Ethan fancy you? How cute…"
I raised an eyebrow back and glared the best I could towards my step-father, "Dad. He's ETHAN SNAPE. He's homophobic, for crying out loud."
Remus smirked, "Yes, I was kidding, Draco. Calm down… But really, why were they talking about you?"
I sighed, leaning back into the soft cushions of the chair, "Would you believe me if I told you Ethan wanted Harry and I to get back together? He fought with Harry over it – Harry defended that Cassandra bitch though, of course."
Remus didn't bother correcting my language; instead, he merely blinked and nodded, "Yes, I can understand why you took offense to that."
"He hates me…" I said quietly, "He promised he'd never be ashamed of me, but… God, if I could only get him to see that Cassandra's using him. He jumped off a building, for Christ's sake, because I broke up with him. Why does he choose now, of all times, to leave me?"
Remus shook his head slowly, "I don't know, son… All you can do is stand by him through this and hope he has the sense to see it before it's too late."
"You mean before they're married." I said bitterly, looking down at my hands.
"No, once married there's always divorce. Harry's the sort of boy who, if he got Cassandra pregnant, he'd stay with her no matter what. I don't think he'd do anything so stupid as to sleep with her before they're married, however."
I sighed, leaning back once more and closing my eyes.
"He slept with me and marriage isn't even legal for the two of us."
Remus smiled slightly and chuckled a bit, "Marriage is merely a legal bond between two people – love is an option there, as well as in sex. Harry loves you now and he loved you then, as did you him, and marriage isn't needed for loving someone. You can be in love your whole life and never get married – it doesn't matter. Cassandra and Harry aren't in love the same way you and Harry are, I'm sure of it. Harry's just looking for love in all the wrong places, that's all."
Remus sighed and paused, looking up at the painting of him, my mother, Micah, and I. "He'll come back to you, Draco… As long as you're willing to stand by him and wait, he'll come home."
I looked over towards Remus, holding an entirely new respect for the man. He was speaking from experience, experience with Lily and the twins – who, strangely enough, held the names of Greek legends with different fathers. It was then when exactly how much of a struggle Remus had with himself each day hit me, and I realized if anyone placed his burdens on my shoulders, I'd immediately collapse.
"Thank you," I said quietly, "For everything."
He looked up at me with tired eyes that crinkled each time he smiled. His amber eyes held a sympathy for myself I was afraid of, yet so desperate to receive.
"You're welcome… Just remember, Draco; eventually, he will come home."
Loving you like I never have before
I'm needing you to open up the door
If begging you might somehow turn the tides
Then tell me to I've got to get this off my mind
I never thought I'd be speaking these words
I never thought I'd need to say
Another day alone is more than I can take
Won't you save me 'cause saving is what I need
I just want to be by your side
Won't you save me I don't want to be
Just drifting through the sea of life
Won't you
Listen please baby don't walk out that door
I'm on my knees you're all I'm living for
I never thought I'd be speaking these words
Heaven thought I'd find a way
Another day alone is more than I can take
Won't you save me 'cause saving is what I need
I just want to be by your side
Won't you save me I don't want to be
Just drifting through the sea of life
Suddenly the sky is falling
Could it be it's too late for me
If I never said I'm sorry, then I'm wrong, yes I'm wrong
Then I hear my spirit calling
Wondering if she's longing for me
And then I know that I can't live without her
Won't you save me 'cause saving is what I need
I just want to be by your side
Won't you save me I don't want to be
Just drifting through this sea of life
Won't you save me
Won't you save me
Won't you save me?*
*Save Me, Hanson
(I love this song. Seriously. Download it. I don't care if it's Hanson - it's a gorgeous song, and Hanson's great anyone, so bite me. I'm the one writing the story here.)
Yay! New chapter... I know, I know, I need to get my lazy butt moving with these chapters, and I will. I kicked my Muse out of my room, so he can't visit nearly as often. Sorry. I love the song at the end... It's mostly what inspired the wedding between Harry and Cassandra. Listening to that son at 6:30 AM on a crowded highschool bus filled with smelly, annoying people who claim to by my age... Yeah. Anyway. Enjoy.
Aimée
My mother always said it takes a big man to cry, and an even bigger one to make him do so. I, being a Malfoy and henceforth never shedding a tear over the inevitable, never did quite understand what she meant by that, even if the saying was meant to be humourous. To this day, it does truly take a stronger man than myself to make me cry; no woman has yet succeeded, save my mother, but when does your mother truly count as a woman?
A mother is someone who gave birth to you, someone who, from the moment they first hold you, are devoted to your happiness and potential for your entire existence. A mother is a person you go to talk to when you need someone and have no one else to turn to…
…Which is exactly what I needed the moment Ethan walked out the door, leaving Harry sitting on a sofa, completely flabbergasted and confused as to what had just gone on.
Unfortunately for me, I had been robbed of my mother less than a year ago, and therefore had no one to turn to. She would have been supportive; she would have found me a way through this…
So why wasn't she here to help?
I leaned up against the door to my room, sighing inwardly and staring out the open window. The sky was a dismal shade of gray and rain was beating down on the pane of glass, matching my mood exactly. I heard a muffled sob and had half the notion to walk out of the room to see how Harry was doing, but I then remembered he was the one who got us both into this, and I had nothing to comfort him with.
I closed my eyes, a picture of him and Cassandra the night he announced their engagement emblazed onto my eyelids. It was no longer a picture of Harry as he slept, as was the preferred image I had of him – instead, it was the opposite of all we had stood for, everything we had despised previously.
With a heavy heart, I concentrated on the stone and brick walls of the Malfoy Manor and Disapparated there with an almost inaudible pop, leaving Harry to deal with his own conscience.
The walls of the Malfoy drawing room appeared around me quite suddenly, and with a gust of unexpressed drama, I collapsed into one of the more comfortable, but fading, armchairs, my eyes locking onto the fire that was burning so cheerfully.
I don't know how long I sat in front of the fire, allowing my thoughts to wander from one topic to the next. It seemed like a lifetime later when I felt a hand touch my shoulder, sending shockwaves of surprise through my body and having me turn around so quickly, I nearly fell out of the chair.
"Remus!" I gasped, breathing heavily, "You scared me!"
His tired, amber eyes gazed down at me, hand still placed on my shoulder. He stood there for a moment before moving to one of the armchairs next to the one I was sitting in, collapsing just as I had hours ago.
"Fight with Harry?"
I shook my head, eyes once again locked onto the cheerful orange and blue flames three meters in front of me.
"No, Ethan came over-"
"Ethan? Ethan Snape? Harry's little brother?" Remus' jaw dropped as he leaned forward slightly in his chair, "You're kidding?"
"Wish I was, Dad, but I'm not. Ethan came over and got into an argument with Harry – typical, really, but they were fighting about me."
Remus raised an eyebrow, "You? What about you? Does Ethan fancy you? How cute…"
I raised an eyebrow back and glared the best I could towards my step-father, "Dad. He's ETHAN SNAPE. He's homophobic, for crying out loud."
Remus smirked, "Yes, I was kidding, Draco. Calm down… But really, why were they talking about you?"
I sighed, leaning back into the soft cushions of the chair, "Would you believe me if I told you Ethan wanted Harry and I to get back together? He fought with Harry over it – Harry defended that Cassandra bitch though, of course."
Remus didn't bother correcting my language; instead, he merely blinked and nodded, "Yes, I can understand why you took offense to that."
"He hates me…" I said quietly, "He promised he'd never be ashamed of me, but… God, if I could only get him to see that Cassandra's using him. He jumped off a building, for Christ's sake, because I broke up with him. Why does he choose now, of all times, to leave me?"
Remus shook his head slowly, "I don't know, son… All you can do is stand by him through this and hope he has the sense to see it before it's too late."
"You mean before they're married." I said bitterly, looking down at my hands.
"No, once married there's always divorce. Harry's the sort of boy who, if he got Cassandra pregnant, he'd stay with her no matter what. I don't think he'd do anything so stupid as to sleep with her before they're married, however."
I sighed, leaning back once more and closing my eyes.
"He slept with me and marriage isn't even legal for the two of us."
Remus smiled slightly and chuckled a bit, "Marriage is merely a legal bond between two people – love is an option there, as well as in sex. Harry loves you now and he loved you then, as did you him, and marriage isn't needed for loving someone. You can be in love your whole life and never get married – it doesn't matter. Cassandra and Harry aren't in love the same way you and Harry are, I'm sure of it. Harry's just looking for love in all the wrong places, that's all."
Remus sighed and paused, looking up at the painting of him, my mother, Micah, and I. "He'll come back to you, Draco… As long as you're willing to stand by him and wait, he'll come home."
I looked over towards Remus, holding an entirely new respect for the man. He was speaking from experience, experience with Lily and the twins – who, strangely enough, held the names of Greek legends with different fathers. It was then when exactly how much of a struggle Remus had with himself each day hit me, and I realized if anyone placed his burdens on my shoulders, I'd immediately collapse.
"Thank you," I said quietly, "For everything."
He looked up at me with tired eyes that crinkled each time he smiled. His amber eyes held a sympathy for myself I was afraid of, yet so desperate to receive.
"You're welcome… Just remember, Draco; eventually, he will come home."
Loving you like I never have before
I'm needing you to open up the door
If begging you might somehow turn the tides
Then tell me to I've got to get this off my mind
I never thought I'd be speaking these words
I never thought I'd need to say
Another day alone is more than I can take
Won't you save me 'cause saving is what I need
I just want to be by your side
Won't you save me I don't want to be
Just drifting through the sea of life
Won't you
Listen please baby don't walk out that door
I'm on my knees you're all I'm living for
I never thought I'd be speaking these words
Heaven thought I'd find a way
Another day alone is more than I can take
Won't you save me 'cause saving is what I need
I just want to be by your side
Won't you save me I don't want to be
Just drifting through the sea of life
Suddenly the sky is falling
Could it be it's too late for me
If I never said I'm sorry, then I'm wrong, yes I'm wrong
Then I hear my spirit calling
Wondering if she's longing for me
And then I know that I can't live without her
Won't you save me 'cause saving is what I need
I just want to be by your side
Won't you save me I don't want to be
Just drifting through this sea of life
Won't you save me
Won't you save me
Won't you save me?*
*Save Me, Hanson
(I love this song. Seriously. Download it. I don't care if it's Hanson - it's a gorgeous song, and Hanson's great anyone, so bite me. I'm the one writing the story here.)