Chapter Nineteen
I love this chapter... *sigh* That's all I'm gonna say.
Aimée
I was struck dumb for the better part of a minute before I managed to respond. All the while, he glared at me with those stony eyes of his, waiting patiently for my reaction.
"Draco – " I started, pausing to try and think out what I could ever possibly say to get him to see how I felt, " – you must know… I've always… God! I can't believe you'd ever think that!"
I shook my head, noticing out of the corner of my eye how Draco's eyes had suddenly turned to narrow slits.
"And I can't believe you'd ever break a promise," he shot back nastily, "You always said nothing would come between us – and we both know you don't love her. So tell me Harry, why now? Is it because you want to have a change of scenery? Forget what the female body looks like?"
"I told you," I said through a clenched jaw, "I haven't fucked her."
He raised an eyebrow at this and leaned back, anger still radiating off of him, "And I don't believe you."
I raised my head quickly, eyes locking with his, "Why not? You know I wouldn't lie to you."
He sighed rather sarcastically, "Dear, dear Harry… such an innocent thing, really. What did I just say? Didn't I just tell you how hurt I was because you lied to me before? I committed myself to you, Harry – I gave you everything, and here you are ready to leave when the first bird comes around, as if I was never there."
"You know that's not true," I said quietly, once again starring at my hands, "I – I just can't. It has nothing to do with you, you know that."
"Really now?" Draco snorted, "In that case, I'll just have to run along and pack my things, seeing as how it's – 'nothing personal '. Just for the record, Harry… it's nothing personal."
He started to stand up and turn around, and as I realized he was completely serious, my heart dropped into my stomach.
"Draco!" I know my cry was more than just a bit pathetic, but at that point in time, I didn't care what he thought about it – all I wanted was a chance to prove to him he was still the most important thing in my life, no matter what anyone else thought.
He turned around expectantly, eyebrows raised and arms crossed, "I shouldn't even bother listening to this, Harry – I'm sick and tired of getting trampled on as if I'm not there. I heard what you said to Ethan, and the funny thing is, you're being a complete hypocrite at the moment, telling me just how much you love me," he snarled. "You don't deserve a second chance, so don't you dare think this is one; I just don't want to sink down to your level and contradict myself. I told you I'd always listen, so here – I'm listening."
I took in a deep breath, but said nothing, I just simply stared at him, wide eyed and completely shocked. He couldn't leave – it'd kill me almost as much as it'd kill him to walk away.
Before I realized what I was doing, I stood up, clutching a pillow in each hand, and strode across the room to where he was standing in all his Malfoy glory. I handed one of the pillows to him and set my own down on the floor next to me.
"Tell me everything you hate about me."
His eyes widened as he made the connection between the pillows and what I was saying, and slowly his eyes lit up in disbelief.
"I'm serious, Draco. Whatever it is you hate about me – whatever you hold against me – why you're about to walk out that door – why you haven't been happy in nearly a year – tell me."
He tucked the pillow under his arm and took one step forward, where his body was a mere two inches from my own. I could feel the heat radiating off of him as he gently took hold of my glasses – silver frames I wore only occasionally – and set them down on one of the bookstands we had on either side of the couches.
He circled me for a moment, sizing me up, and finally stopped, holding the pillow in his hands tightly. Without warning, the navy object came flying at me, hitting me so hard in the face I nearly toppled onto the couch.
"I hate the way you chose Cassandra over me."
Another hit, this time aimed towards the chest.
"I hate the way you told me you loved me and never wanted to let me go."
Solar Plexus, this time taking my breath away.
"I hate the way you look at me."
Another hit, another, another…
"I hate how you always pretend to listen, but you never hear me… I hate the way you always get the attention… I hate the way you have a father and I don't… I hate how your siblings adore you… I hate how I'm always so jealous of you… I hate it that you're always the good guy and I'm always the bad guy…"
Each time he hit me with the pillow, the force drove me back a step or two, until I was halfway down the hall. He paused for a moment, breathing in heavily and flexing his arms slightly. He repositioned himself and started once again, this time driving me into a room.
"I wish you'd choose me… I wish you'd dump that bitch and see exactly what she's doing to you… I hate it that I can't show you how much I love you… I hate it how you're always so perfect…"
With one final blow, I was forced onto the bed of the bedroom he and I shared. I landed on my back and my limbs were spread out; I attempted to catch my breath as I saw the demon inside Draco's eyes back down slightly, but he hit me once more, across the knees.
Still clutching the pillow with his left hand, he crawled on top of the bed and ultimately on top of me, rocking back and forth on his hips as he straddled me.
"I hate the way you make me want to strap you to the bed and fuck your brains out."
A moment later, both he and I were shirtless, his face less than an inch from mine, but he had absolutely no intentions of kissing me.
"How does it feel, Harry, to know someone else has control for once?"
Two awkward, yet familiar, movements later, both of us were stripped down to only our underwear, showing our mutual – yet perverted – enjoyment of the situation.
"I hate how you're always in control, Harry. I hate not having a say."
With a maddening rush and tangle of limbs, we were both completely naked, Draco still straddling me, rocking back and forth slightly like a madman.
"And most of all, Harry, I hate how I want this so, so much when I know how much you hate me and are probably completely disgusted by the mere thought of this, and I hate you for it… Hate you hate you hate you hate you!"
His nails were digging into my chest painfully, but I barely noticed the trickles of blood. I simply gazed up at him as he panted, almost completely out of breath.
"I love you." I whispered, leaning forward and kissing his parted lips, registering the shock that suddenly rocked through his body.
That entire night, I never stopped kissing him.
You're more than tongue tied this time
Well I can feel it in your lips
Nobody told me you were a sucker for a kiss
Music low
We're all alone
Being wrong never felt so right
Tell me about your first kiss
Tell me or have you already forgotten it
Tell me about your first kiss
What do I have to do to get through all of this?
I'm writing it down
I bet you thought this song was about you
You're more than just mad this time
You've got that look in your eye
Nobody told me you were a sucker for a kiss
Music low
We're all alone
Being wrong never felt so right
Tell me about your first kiss
Tell me or have you already forgotten it
Tell me about your first kiss
What do I have to do to get through all of this?
I'm writing it down
Just leave me here and tell me to my face
What you think about
Can we figure out
What happened to our happy ending anyway?
How you feel about
Leaving me here
With a lot more left to say
Music low
We're all alone
Being wrong never felt so right
Tell me about your first kiss
Tell me or have you already forgotten it
Tell me about your first kiss
What do I have to do to get through all of this?
I'm writing it down
I bet you thought this song was about you*
*A New Found Glory, Sucker
I love this chapter... *sigh* That's all I'm gonna say.
Aimée
I was struck dumb for the better part of a minute before I managed to respond. All the while, he glared at me with those stony eyes of his, waiting patiently for my reaction.
"Draco – " I started, pausing to try and think out what I could ever possibly say to get him to see how I felt, " – you must know… I've always… God! I can't believe you'd ever think that!"
I shook my head, noticing out of the corner of my eye how Draco's eyes had suddenly turned to narrow slits.
"And I can't believe you'd ever break a promise," he shot back nastily, "You always said nothing would come between us – and we both know you don't love her. So tell me Harry, why now? Is it because you want to have a change of scenery? Forget what the female body looks like?"
"I told you," I said through a clenched jaw, "I haven't fucked her."
He raised an eyebrow at this and leaned back, anger still radiating off of him, "And I don't believe you."
I raised my head quickly, eyes locking with his, "Why not? You know I wouldn't lie to you."
He sighed rather sarcastically, "Dear, dear Harry… such an innocent thing, really. What did I just say? Didn't I just tell you how hurt I was because you lied to me before? I committed myself to you, Harry – I gave you everything, and here you are ready to leave when the first bird comes around, as if I was never there."
"You know that's not true," I said quietly, once again starring at my hands, "I – I just can't. It has nothing to do with you, you know that."
"Really now?" Draco snorted, "In that case, I'll just have to run along and pack my things, seeing as how it's – 'nothing personal '. Just for the record, Harry… it's nothing personal."
He started to stand up and turn around, and as I realized he was completely serious, my heart dropped into my stomach.
"Draco!" I know my cry was more than just a bit pathetic, but at that point in time, I didn't care what he thought about it – all I wanted was a chance to prove to him he was still the most important thing in my life, no matter what anyone else thought.
He turned around expectantly, eyebrows raised and arms crossed, "I shouldn't even bother listening to this, Harry – I'm sick and tired of getting trampled on as if I'm not there. I heard what you said to Ethan, and the funny thing is, you're being a complete hypocrite at the moment, telling me just how much you love me," he snarled. "You don't deserve a second chance, so don't you dare think this is one; I just don't want to sink down to your level and contradict myself. I told you I'd always listen, so here – I'm listening."
I took in a deep breath, but said nothing, I just simply stared at him, wide eyed and completely shocked. He couldn't leave – it'd kill me almost as much as it'd kill him to walk away.
Before I realized what I was doing, I stood up, clutching a pillow in each hand, and strode across the room to where he was standing in all his Malfoy glory. I handed one of the pillows to him and set my own down on the floor next to me.
"Tell me everything you hate about me."
His eyes widened as he made the connection between the pillows and what I was saying, and slowly his eyes lit up in disbelief.
"I'm serious, Draco. Whatever it is you hate about me – whatever you hold against me – why you're about to walk out that door – why you haven't been happy in nearly a year – tell me."
He tucked the pillow under his arm and took one step forward, where his body was a mere two inches from my own. I could feel the heat radiating off of him as he gently took hold of my glasses – silver frames I wore only occasionally – and set them down on one of the bookstands we had on either side of the couches.
He circled me for a moment, sizing me up, and finally stopped, holding the pillow in his hands tightly. Without warning, the navy object came flying at me, hitting me so hard in the face I nearly toppled onto the couch.
"I hate the way you chose Cassandra over me."
Another hit, this time aimed towards the chest.
"I hate the way you told me you loved me and never wanted to let me go."
Solar Plexus, this time taking my breath away.
"I hate the way you look at me."
Another hit, another, another…
"I hate how you always pretend to listen, but you never hear me… I hate the way you always get the attention… I hate the way you have a father and I don't… I hate how your siblings adore you… I hate how I'm always so jealous of you… I hate it that you're always the good guy and I'm always the bad guy…"
Each time he hit me with the pillow, the force drove me back a step or two, until I was halfway down the hall. He paused for a moment, breathing in heavily and flexing his arms slightly. He repositioned himself and started once again, this time driving me into a room.
"I wish you'd choose me… I wish you'd dump that bitch and see exactly what she's doing to you… I hate it that I can't show you how much I love you… I hate it how you're always so perfect…"
With one final blow, I was forced onto the bed of the bedroom he and I shared. I landed on my back and my limbs were spread out; I attempted to catch my breath as I saw the demon inside Draco's eyes back down slightly, but he hit me once more, across the knees.
Still clutching the pillow with his left hand, he crawled on top of the bed and ultimately on top of me, rocking back and forth on his hips as he straddled me.
"I hate the way you make me want to strap you to the bed and fuck your brains out."
A moment later, both he and I were shirtless, his face less than an inch from mine, but he had absolutely no intentions of kissing me.
"How does it feel, Harry, to know someone else has control for once?"
Two awkward, yet familiar, movements later, both of us were stripped down to only our underwear, showing our mutual – yet perverted – enjoyment of the situation.
"I hate how you're always in control, Harry. I hate not having a say."
With a maddening rush and tangle of limbs, we were both completely naked, Draco still straddling me, rocking back and forth slightly like a madman.
"And most of all, Harry, I hate how I want this so, so much when I know how much you hate me and are probably completely disgusted by the mere thought of this, and I hate you for it… Hate you hate you hate you hate you!"
His nails were digging into my chest painfully, but I barely noticed the trickles of blood. I simply gazed up at him as he panted, almost completely out of breath.
"I love you." I whispered, leaning forward and kissing his parted lips, registering the shock that suddenly rocked through his body.
That entire night, I never stopped kissing him.
You're more than tongue tied this time
Well I can feel it in your lips
Nobody told me you were a sucker for a kiss
Music low
We're all alone
Being wrong never felt so right
Tell me about your first kiss
Tell me or have you already forgotten it
Tell me about your first kiss
What do I have to do to get through all of this?
I'm writing it down
I bet you thought this song was about you
You're more than just mad this time
You've got that look in your eye
Nobody told me you were a sucker for a kiss
Music low
We're all alone
Being wrong never felt so right
Tell me about your first kiss
Tell me or have you already forgotten it
Tell me about your first kiss
What do I have to do to get through all of this?
I'm writing it down
Just leave me here and tell me to my face
What you think about
Can we figure out
What happened to our happy ending anyway?
How you feel about
Leaving me here
With a lot more left to say
Music low
We're all alone
Being wrong never felt so right
Tell me about your first kiss
Tell me or have you already forgotten it
Tell me about your first kiss
What do I have to do to get through all of this?
I'm writing it down
I bet you thought this song was about you*
*A New Found Glory, Sucker