A/N: I'm listening to the Rocky Horror soundtrack as I write this, so the urge to have Jared suddenly don a leather jacket and burst into song is almost overwhelming. I'm writing this note as I start the chapter, by the end you will be able to tell if I resisted or not. Also, in case you can't figure it out, the next chapter was a bit heavily influenced by role-playing with Dib's Lyn. I is gonna hug her! *does and sends her running away screaming*

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Jared visited the house of his creator in the night like a black plague. One by one, servant, dog, and master of the household fell silently, dead upon the sheets of their beds. He came in through the cracks in the windows, pushed himself past the security systems. One great, gelatinous mass, he wormed his way up the stairwell and took them out by wrapping each one in his embrace and then squeezing like a dark snake.

Some of them awoke. Some tried to scream, their mouths full of his oily skin as their eyes nearly ejected from their heads. The vast majority, however, died silently in their sleep, unaware that the air had been stolen from their lungs as their ribs crushed inward.

Jared stood silently beside his creator and the creator's mistress, although from the fact that she'd gone to bed with knee-high nylon stockings and eye shadow on, Jared doubted she was any sort of legitimate mistress. No, she was more the kind for cheap detective novels. Jared felt bad. She wasn't bad looking, and she probably hadn't been after anything more than a paycheck.

"In the wrong place at the wrong time, just like when I was a smeet. Did anyone weep for me?" Jared asked, shrugging his shoulders. "No. So I won't weep for them." He turned her dead face up so her sightless eyes met his. "You'll be famous in death. Scientist and his whore found dead in bed together, suffocated with their ribs crushed. What a beautiful death, my dear, right? Who could wish for more?"

Jared released her and turned on his heel, ready to disappear off into the night. He was finally free of the need for revenge, and his hearts had never felt lighter. There was nothing left in them but thoughts of Dee. He'd start his revolution, sew the seeds of dissent, and then eliminate that bratty Reiinko and his equally deserving of death father and uncle. Then he'd watch as Dee ascended to the throne, beautiful blue tears shining on her green skin, saying her heart ached from the circumstances, but not really meaning it.

Then he'd come forward, offer her pity, court her. Next would come the wedding night, when she'd see his true nature… and either she would embrace it and fall from her pedestal into the depths of his hell, or she'd be one more notch on his belt of victims. Yes, that was the perfect plan. That was…

The phone was ringing. Irritated, Jared took another step towards the door, but something itched in the back of his neck. This wasn't just an ordinary phone call, some little part of his gut said. This was opportunity calling.

"Hello?" Jared said, hushing his voice as he answered the phone.

"Boss? Are you feeling okay? You sound funny."

"I've got a bit of a cough. Damn, if that ho got me sick…"

The man on the other end of the line laughed. "Yeah, boss, I understand, but you better not explain it to your missus when she comes back that way!"

"Of course not," Jared said, his voice oozing pleasantry as his feet oozed upon the carpet. "What's the matter?"

"It's Sharon. She died in surgery."

"Sharon? Gods, you expect me to remember them by their names now?"

"No, no sir! I forgot, I'm sorry. She was the one we were trying to implant the heat vision eyes into. The pretty girl who talked about how she wanted to open up a flower shop. Only flowers she'll get will be thrown on an unmarked grave, now."

The man's voice and nature made a shiver run down Jared's neck. How could he be so callus over a poor girl's death? "Want to come down and have a look? She's not as pretty on the slab as she was in life, but…"

"I would, but there's a slight problem. I'm far too drunk to get myself down the stairs in one piece, let alone drive myself over without mowing down every tree between here and you. Can you send a driver for me?"

"Right, boss, will do!"

"Don't have him come in, I don't want to wake the house. I'll wait outside."

As soon as Jared settled the phone down, his body shook and mutated. Slowly, he became the splitting image of his late creator. "What a hateful creature I am!" Jared mocked into the mirror. Ripping off the dead man's pack, he stuck it onto his own back. "You'll help me clear security, my little beauty. Shall we go down and wait for our taxi?"

"Charge it to the business account," Jared grunted at the driver as he slid out of the taxi.

"Yes, sir. Always nice to do business for you, sir."

Jared grunted again. Boy, wasn't this going to mess up the police? The man's autopsy would show he died hours before he was last seen. Jared grinned the wicked smile of the damned. Maybe the assistant would get the blame for his murder.

Jared descended the stairs into the basement lab, following a short and squat green-eyed Irken with "Tony" written on his ID tag. Tony didn't sound like the one on the phone, but maybe the phone lines were merely bad in the area.

Jared paused outside a cell, containing an Irken. Only, it wasn't fully an Irken. It had long, muscular arms covered in dark yellow fur marred with black spots. It was curled up in the fetal position, nude, apparently asleep. Every once in awhile its expression would move from neutral to a grimace of pain, though, usually corresponding with a soft humming from the large metal machine.

"I've forgotten what this machine does."

The assistant stared. "Sir… but… YOU designed it!"

"I'm drunk off my rocker. Humor me before I break your antennae in six places."

"Yes, sir. It's your artificial insemination device."

"I don't need to hear more." Jared looked about. "How many are in this complex? Guard and everything?"

"The two guards at each of the three entrances, plus roving guards and a janitor or two. And you and me. Why do you ask? Do you want to… ya know?" the Irken's eyes gleamed for only a second with intent before Jared reached out, slammed the man's head back, and heard his neck crack sickeningly. "No, I want to know if I can kill all of you before the alarm is raised."

Jared pulled the release lever for the device. The fluid within slowly drained out, and the Irken within looked up at him with blank eyes. When they focused, however, eyes that were mere black slits set among gold narrowed. "YOU!" she hissed, lunging straight at his throat.

Jared dodged and easily threw her off, wires still streaming out of her half-Irken body. She flipped in mid-air and landed on all fours. "That's the same thought I had," he said coldy. "I am NOT that man. I'm his doppelganger."

"I don't believe you," she snarled, extending six-inch long claws out of her hands.

"Go ahead, then, kill me."

She hesitated, smelling a trap. Then, deciding her life was forfeit either way, she sprang at him. Jared opened up his chest without any effort and swallowed her inside. She kicked and tried to tear at him like an agitated smeet within him for a few moments, then grew still. Jared ejected her from within himself as though she'd had a bitter taste.

She looked up, fur soaked with oil, eyes shining through darkness. "I believe you. I believe you now."

Jared picked her up and brushed the dirt from her fur. Her limbs were fur covered, but her torso was that of a normal Irken. Her eyes were like those of the great cats Jared had only seen in books.

"What did they do to you?" Jared asked as she shook in his grip.

"I was in a ship crash. Lost all but what you still see as Irken. They fused these… these horrible limbs onto me! They made me a monster! Then… then, I don't even KNOW what they did to my eyes!" she sobbed.

Jared put an arm around her. "Hush. Are there others?"

She nodded, antennae bobbling. "Good. Go release them, and tell them to come to top layer. I'll knock out the guards… and we'll leave this horrible place."

"Wait!" she protested, running a furred paw along his face. "You are Jared."

Jared froze. A trap? "How do you know my name?"

"Everyone knows your name. You escaped. The master lived in horrid fear of you."

Jared snorted. "Then why wasn't his house equipped to protect him from me?"

"I… I don't know. But I smell a rat," she snarled. "I'd better get to the others fast."

Jared was in the hallway, throwing an unconscious guard into a closet, when he saw the red and blue lights growing in the distance. "Hurry!" he screamed, not caring if the still alive guards heard him. "We have to get out before the police arrive with guns!" They couldn't hurt him, he knew, but he was worried about the leopard-limbed female.

Indeed, the guards had heard, but their voices were cut off by thick black and purple tentacles dropping from the ceiling and wrapping around their necks, cutting off their oxygen before they could so much as cry for their cold, unfeeling arms.

The two tentacle-covered females looked at one another, a string of glowing red circles above their red eyes, and beckoned to a male with similar appendages. Eight long, thick black and red tentacles with slightly purple undersides ejected out of their backs. Their eyes were all red. Their skin was sleek, wet looking, and black, not like the dry scales of more conventional Irkens. The three retreated back up to the ceiling and moved with inhuman speed towards where Jared was waiting.

"Get the smeets out the back," Jared ordered, gesturing with one arm. "The rest of us will go out the front and head the cops off straight up."

"They'll be armed to protect themselves from us. This lab was illegal, but… well… not unexpected. The law was paid to turn a blind eye to it," one of the tentacle ceiling clinging Irkens explained, adjusting the red glow so that it wouldn't be too apparent from outside.

"Right… I have an idea," Jared said.

The cops walked slowly towards the lab, armed indeed with the kind of weapons most normal Irkens would only see in… well, they'd never see them. They were highly secretive military guns. The cops nodded to one another, six squad cars' worth, and moved forward and into the lab.

"Put your claws, tentacles, and whatever else you've got into the air!" a youthful cop shouted, jumping into the lab. Silence met him. "Turn on the lights, guys!"

The cops did, only to find two dead guards, and not a thing beyond. "They're in here, or the area. They can't get away, there's no where to hide in this desert for miles."

"What's that sound?" another cop asked, antennae perking up.

"OUR SQUAD CARS!" yet another cried in horror, pointing out a window as the squad ships shot straight up into the air. "Get out there and shoot them down! Hurry!"

As the officers emerged from the building, tentacles shot down, grabbing them all by the necks and dispatching them quickly. The officers who had the chance to see the tentacles coming retreated, shooting wildly at them.

From behind, an officer felt something like a bug prick on his neck, then full over with a tranquilizer lodged in his necks. The next few moments were chaos, and not even the experiments really knew what happened, but in the end, they stood victoriously over the silent officers.

"Let's leave," Jared snapped. "Everyone to the squad cars! Those that can ride on their roofs, do! When these guys don't report back, I bet the military is going to jump up our butts really fast."

The other experiments nodded. Jared turned to the leopard. "You haven't lived in the labs your whole life! Is there a place somewhere around here we can flee?"

"The forest, but that's the first place they'll look for us."

Jared hissed. "Then we'll go to the least place they'd expect." He pointed to dusty lights in the distance. "Straight into the heart of the city."

"Are you NUTS? The minute someone sees any one of us they'll be on the phone to the cops!"

"No, not they won't, because they won't see us."

"What are you…?"

"The old bomb shelters, from before the Massive was built. If the city is old enough, the underground should be ripe with them. They'll smell and be crumbling, of course, but we can hide there until we figure out how to get every last one of us off this planet intact."

"To the city!" one of the tentacle monsters shouted. He could tell the three tentacle siblings were used to being in charge, as no one questioned their word, and snapped to do their bidding far faster than they jumped to Jared's words.

Jared's information had come from old magazines thrown into his cell, and it had proved correct. Torches lit by the experiments guided them through the old bomb shelters as the freed experiments crept along, eyes of all sorts peering up at crumbling statues of past Irken tallests. Jared peered up at them, seeing that at one point someone had gone through all the trouble of giving a good dozen of them painted moustaches.

He turned his head to the leopard-limbed girl. "What's your name? And do you mind that I can see your- uh- fur?"

She frowned. "If I had clothes, I'd wear them."

"Sorry. We'll get you some, I promise!"

"My name's Lily. Funny, huh? I certainly don't look like a Lily, do I?"

"Looks can be deceiving. Who are the ones clinging to the wall?"

"The spiders or the octapi?"

"The octapi. I didn't even notice the spiders."

"The girls are Nell and Hentai. The boy is Carl."

"Carl?"

"Carl."

Jared found himself truly laughing in what felt like the first time in ages. "Well, Lily… I can honestly say it's one of the greatest pleasures of my life to meet you."

Lily looked surprised, then smiled sincerely. "Yeah, me too. You're not mad that I tried to kill you?"

"Of course not. I would have done the same thing in your position."

Her smile softened, her heart melting a touch. She still wasn't ready to let herself trust anyone after what she'd been through in the lab, going to sleep expecting Irken limbs and waking up a monster, but… but Jared's kindness was making her feel that, with a little time, maybe she could get over it.

She hated to admit it, but she did kinda think he was cute. Blushing a dark green, she quickly turned her face away. Jared, meanwhile, had completely more political things on his mind. "Are the… crawly things… the leaders of this group?"

"No. There's a very, very old woman with transplanted limbs… like me… they listen to her." The girl frowned. "She kinda scares me."

"I want to meet her as soon as we get into a big enough area to all rest."

That happened about forty-five minutes of walking later, and it couldn't have happened at a better time. The smeets were fussing, many hungry or simply tired from having to walk their tiny smeet feet so far into the cavern. Jared listened for the ones who had gone off to distance the squad cars from their hiding place to return, but heard nothing. He hoped they'd return soon.

One of the tentacle monsters, one of the females, came up and saluted Jared. "We've got several Irkens with great night vision guarding the way down, and a couple of web-slingers. They'll cover our tracks once the stragglers catch up."

Jared saluted her back. "Thank you, but we haven't been introduced."

"My mistake. I'm Nell. My sister over there is Henti, and her mate is Carl."

"I'm Jared. Mate? I thought you were all siblings."

"No. Just the two of us are."

"I see. Where is your leader? I want to have a few words with her about my ideas for leadership."

"Oh, of course the leadership will be handed to you," Nell said, her voice not betraying any hint of humor. "You are the great and terrible Jared. Your powers are second to none, from what we heard of you when you escaped. Among us, he who is most powerful rules, not he who is tallest."

"I don't want the whole rule right away. I'll share, since she's experienced and I'm new at it. Take me to her."

Nell looked as though he'd said something bizarre, but nodded and gestured with one tentacle. "Come with me, please."