AN: this is getting to the point now.
When he finally regained his senses he glanced around the room and realized that he was alone. He pinched himself, making sure that he was awake. He was, yet he still felt as though he were part of the most surreal dream in the world. Had the Sheriff and Carvallo both just sat in front of him and approved relationships in CSI? Had they said that no recriminations would be brought against having an open relationship? Had they really just removed the biggest barrier to heaven, to Sara?
He left the room still in something of a daze, he was now well into his shift and he had not even opened a case file.
What could he say to her? How could he say everything he needed to without saying the wrong thing? How could he do this after spending so long denying her? Hurting her?
By 7am Grissom had attempted several case file reviews, but his mind was still occupied by what he anticipated and hoped would be a life altering morning. He had caught sight of Sara on several occasions as she passed his office. On each occasion his entire being filled immediately with joy at finally having an opportunity to pursue a life with her without damaging her career or reputation. However, simultaneously he was filled with an all encompassing dread at the possibility of rejection. Had she ever wanted a relationship with him? He thought she did once. If she did, would she still want a relationship with him after his recent behavior? It was this contradiction of emotion which caused him to expel the contents of his stomach moments after she passed by. He knew that he had to try. He just wasn't sure how to do it without vomiting enough to either repulse her or end up in hospital.
By 7.30 he was outside of her apartment and ready to knock. As he raised his hand he heard a voice
"Hello" He visibly jumped. He did not need a distraction. Not now.
"Are you looking for Sara."
He tried to reply, but his tongue felt like it was made out of carpet, "uhhh…ye…yes."
"I'm sorry dear, Sara has her class on Thursday's, she won't be back 'til noon. She gets me to pay the paperboy." The elderly lady in the apartment opposite Sara's offered by way of an explaination.
"oh…I see' thank you" Grissom managed to croak out.
"Would you like to leave her a message, or even put a note on her door."
"Thank you"
The lady shuffled inside her apartment and Grissom was left in quiet contemplation of her suggestion.