Chapter four
"So you have come for your knife, I see" Buddha said as he slowly pulled it out.
Harry wanted to shove that knife up 'Buddha's ass so bad, he'd wish it was a dildo. Out of nowhere, a dude in a black robe (it looked like) with dark glasses all the sudden flew to 'Buddha's head. The head was chopped off and revealing a small red locket.
"Sorry if my bitch was pissing you off," said the dark-eyed dude-stranger.
Harry just blinked.
"Who the fuck are you"
"I'm Ne- uhhhhhhhh….ville. yea, I'm Neville"
Apparently, this was a mistake because all the sudden, Harry grabbed his knife.
"You sick bitch!!!!!!!! How did you survive????"
Harry continuously stabbed him in random places, never knowing 'Neville'.
Harry spotted the red locket and immediately, his knife find it's way to the heart of the locket. Harry opened it up and revealed a picture of Dolores Umbrige.
It said: Neo, Thanks for last night. Remember to bring flavored 'ones' next time
Lover, Dolores
Harry made a face. How gross was that? He decided to add Dolores Umbridge to the top of his 'people to kill' list, which included everyone in the world, except Mr. Fluffy, the rabbit and a hobo named Bob who had given him his first knife way back when he lived permanently on Privet Drive. (Of course, Petunia had confiscated it soon after).
He quietly walked out of the asylum, (though he decapitated three patients, and disemboweled two-but he did it silently.) He stole some change from the security guard after he hacked him to pieces, and made his way to the subway. After hacking a turnstile to pieces, and gouging holes in the walls of the train, he sat down in a plastic seat and glowered at his fellow passengers. He tapped his foot. A man read a newspaper, and others looked out the windows like zombies.
'Damn' thought Harry, 'these people are already dead. They're no fun'
He exited the train without killing one person. He made up for it by killing a group of giggling teens outside. He looked around the city, and made his way to the leaky cauldron.
He walked in and surveyed the room, many people turned to stare at the famous boy, rather afraid of him because of the rumors they have heard. He walked to the counter and asked the bartender for a beer.
"No way, you're just a kid" the bartender said.
Harry grinned evilly at him and whipped out the infamous knife.
"Beer or die" Harry said.
The bartender took one look at the knife and gave the crazed Harry the beer. Once Harry was in a buzz he disemboweled the bartender anyway, everyone was too drunk by then to notice. So Harry wandered between the tables, killing random people, at least the ones who looked at him nasty (which was almost everyone).
He finally walked out the back and into Diagon Alley. He leaped onto the back of a pedestrian and beheaded them. Everyone nearby fled for their lives. Harry threw his knife at the back of ones head, and when he ran over to retrieve it, he looked straight ahead and spotted his prey...Umbridge.
Harry stalked Umbrige after seeing her pay some male-whore dancing slutty and fucking her on the spot. It was horrid for Harry, considering seeing something ugly humping anything her size. After she was done, Harry snuck up on her.
"Hi bitch, 'member me?"
Umbrige shrieked, but obviously not in time, since now her breast were chopped off. Harry was pleased, thinking that she can finally feels how to be a freak, the bitch. Harry then slashed her face and she fainted. Harry threw the corpse at her male-whores since they were witnesses and died quickly due the corpse's weight.
Harry, after all this, had been walking around for what seemed like, to him, 100 years. He wandered out onto the streets, lazily waving his knife around (and nearly hacking off a large number of noses and fingers while doing so). He wandered off into Hogsmeade (though no one ever did find out how he managed to get there in his state) and walked up to the shrieking shack.
The few people standing near the shack (mostly kids who wanted to prove their bravery, or horny teens hoping for some privacy) watched him in silence. Harry pulled open the door, and stumbled inside. mumbling something that sounded like "fuck you all little fuckers…you killed my fucking father before i got the fucking chance…" in the general direction of the spectators.
Finally, he found what he had been looking for. He collapsed onto the dusty, moldy bed in the shrieking shack, and was instantly asleep. His dreams were filled with Knives and blood and lots of lovely victims, whom he could kill over and over. A sick smile appeared on his face. No one could wake him.
People still stayed even farther away from the shrieking shack once they heard about the deranged hero inside. Wizard children were told from then on, that if they were bad, the bloodthirsty monster inside would wake up and kill them.
Because who knew when he might comeback?
*~*~*~*Alternate Ending!!!!!!!!!!!!!*~*~*~*
Harry explored the city , there were many people, but somehow Harry felt no desire for bloodshed. He swung his knife around like a child with a baseball bat.
As he wandered toward an alleyway, he thought he spied Hedwig, and slit her throat, or at least he thought that was Hedwig, there were so many of her all around him, he screamed as he slashed with his deadly knife. Soon the ground around Harry was covered in thick blood, his eyes crazy, he kept having strange thoughts. Had all the killing finally got to him? He stumbled out of the city, ready to fight off all the Hedwigs he saw.
Harry wanted to shove that knife up 'Buddha's ass so bad, he'd wish it was a dildo. Out of nowhere, a dude in a black robe (it looked like) with dark glasses all the sudden flew to 'Buddha's head. The head was chopped off and revealing a small red locket.
"Sorry if my bitch was pissing you off," said the dark-eyed dude-stranger.
Harry just blinked.
"Who the fuck are you"
"I'm Ne- uhhhhhhhh….ville. yea, I'm Neville"
Apparently, this was a mistake because all the sudden, Harry grabbed his knife.
"You sick bitch!!!!!!!! How did you survive????"
Harry continuously stabbed him in random places, never knowing 'Neville'.
Harry spotted the red locket and immediately, his knife find it's way to the heart of the locket. Harry opened it up and revealed a picture of Dolores Umbrige.
It said: Neo, Thanks for last night. Remember to bring flavored 'ones' next time
Lover, Dolores
Harry made a face. How gross was that? He decided to add Dolores Umbridge to the top of his 'people to kill' list, which included everyone in the world, except Mr. Fluffy, the rabbit and a hobo named Bob who had given him his first knife way back when he lived permanently on Privet Drive. (Of course, Petunia had confiscated it soon after).
He quietly walked out of the asylum, (though he decapitated three patients, and disemboweled two-but he did it silently.) He stole some change from the security guard after he hacked him to pieces, and made his way to the subway. After hacking a turnstile to pieces, and gouging holes in the walls of the train, he sat down in a plastic seat and glowered at his fellow passengers. He tapped his foot. A man read a newspaper, and others looked out the windows like zombies.
'Damn' thought Harry, 'these people are already dead. They're no fun'
He exited the train without killing one person. He made up for it by killing a group of giggling teens outside. He looked around the city, and made his way to the leaky cauldron.
He walked in and surveyed the room, many people turned to stare at the famous boy, rather afraid of him because of the rumors they have heard. He walked to the counter and asked the bartender for a beer.
"No way, you're just a kid" the bartender said.
Harry grinned evilly at him and whipped out the infamous knife.
"Beer or die" Harry said.
The bartender took one look at the knife and gave the crazed Harry the beer. Once Harry was in a buzz he disemboweled the bartender anyway, everyone was too drunk by then to notice. So Harry wandered between the tables, killing random people, at least the ones who looked at him nasty (which was almost everyone).
He finally walked out the back and into Diagon Alley. He leaped onto the back of a pedestrian and beheaded them. Everyone nearby fled for their lives. Harry threw his knife at the back of ones head, and when he ran over to retrieve it, he looked straight ahead and spotted his prey...Umbridge.
Harry stalked Umbrige after seeing her pay some male-whore dancing slutty and fucking her on the spot. It was horrid for Harry, considering seeing something ugly humping anything her size. After she was done, Harry snuck up on her.
"Hi bitch, 'member me?"
Umbrige shrieked, but obviously not in time, since now her breast were chopped off. Harry was pleased, thinking that she can finally feels how to be a freak, the bitch. Harry then slashed her face and she fainted. Harry threw the corpse at her male-whores since they were witnesses and died quickly due the corpse's weight.
Harry, after all this, had been walking around for what seemed like, to him, 100 years. He wandered out onto the streets, lazily waving his knife around (and nearly hacking off a large number of noses and fingers while doing so). He wandered off into Hogsmeade (though no one ever did find out how he managed to get there in his state) and walked up to the shrieking shack.
The few people standing near the shack (mostly kids who wanted to prove their bravery, or horny teens hoping for some privacy) watched him in silence. Harry pulled open the door, and stumbled inside. mumbling something that sounded like "fuck you all little fuckers…you killed my fucking father before i got the fucking chance…" in the general direction of the spectators.
Finally, he found what he had been looking for. He collapsed onto the dusty, moldy bed in the shrieking shack, and was instantly asleep. His dreams were filled with Knives and blood and lots of lovely victims, whom he could kill over and over. A sick smile appeared on his face. No one could wake him.
People still stayed even farther away from the shrieking shack once they heard about the deranged hero inside. Wizard children were told from then on, that if they were bad, the bloodthirsty monster inside would wake up and kill them.
Because who knew when he might comeback?
*~*~*~*Alternate Ending!!!!!!!!!!!!!*~*~*~*
Harry explored the city , there were many people, but somehow Harry felt no desire for bloodshed. He swung his knife around like a child with a baseball bat.
As he wandered toward an alleyway, he thought he spied Hedwig, and slit her throat, or at least he thought that was Hedwig, there were so many of her all around him, he screamed as he slashed with his deadly knife. Soon the ground around Harry was covered in thick blood, his eyes crazy, he kept having strange thoughts. Had all the killing finally got to him? He stumbled out of the city, ready to fight off all the Hedwigs he saw.