THE MATRIX SCREWED CHAPTER 3
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On The REAL Ship:
Neo: Let's blow stuff up!
Morpheus: No. The voices in my head command me to take my pants off and do the Macarena! 1 maca 2maca 3 Macarena!
Trinity: Are you going to do the Macarena all day?
Morpheus: If the great voice commands it.
Voice in Morpheus' head: Rape Trinity! Rape Anyone!
Morpheus: Ok I am getting a psychiatrist now.
Random cops: WE'RE NOT DEAD YET AND I KNOW HYPNOTISM!
Neo: BAMBAM!
Cypher: That's it Neo . . . hehehehhehehe go ahead and destroy Zion for me!
Trinity: Cypher are you planning to destroy Zion?
Cypher: Um, err, I me-, ye- I mean no. N-n-n-n-ye-NO.
Trinity: Oh good I was a bit suspicious.
Cypher: Just 2 more days till I sabotage it all . . . hehehehehheheehhehehehhehehe. .. .
Trinity: Cypher you need a vacation.
Neo: I KNOW JUST THE PLACE
Cypher: Really?
Neo: IT HAS LOTS OF NUDE WOMEN!
Cypher: I can't think of any catch . . .
(Neo throws Cypher into the ship)
Random Nude Women: WE HATE MEN KILL HIM!
Cypher: This wasn't in the brochure!
RNW: (Charge holding lots of torches, pitchforks, and tons of guns)
Cypher: I am so going back to the Matrix . . .
In the Matrix:
Cypher: This steak is so juicy because the Matrix is sending a message to my brain that it is purple and juicy and firm like your boobs.
Agent: This is why they told me not to get the sex-change surgery. Alright, you kill someone and I send you back to the matrix.
Cypher: Easy enough. (Pulls out nuke and bombs Iraq)
Sadaam Hussein: Oh those damn Americans are at it again.
Agent: *Sigh* The architect lives in Iraq . ..
Cypher: He was getting executed tomorrow anyway.
Agent: Why?
Cypher: Breathing.
Agent: One screwed up country . . .
In the Nebuchanezzar:
Morpheus: Oh damn we ran out of battery power! Lets go to Iraq and get some manual labor.
Neo: Cypher blew it up.
Morpheus: I knew he was trouble!
Energizer Bunny: Here's a AA. Never use Duracell again dammit!
Morpheus: Lets get you to Oracle.
Trinity: Don't you mean the Oracle?
Morpheus: Oh crap I was gonna get my computer fixed!
Dozer and Tank: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH(Getting electrocuted)
5438568732534756923869856843657863489473685763257863489387956378567384658725 4182358963289562839569823658926598268165438759325798324658236578234658934590 3246589643857634856324568734657834658364587634857632478563487653846578346578 3462578346578324965784396578932465783465784936573828190541359320154032510305 46135981354231985001456493106519109654318519038256098430
On The REAL Ship:
Neo: Let's blow stuff up!
Morpheus: No. The voices in my head command me to take my pants off and do the Macarena! 1 maca 2maca 3 Macarena!
Trinity: Are you going to do the Macarena all day?
Morpheus: If the great voice commands it.
Voice in Morpheus' head: Rape Trinity! Rape Anyone!
Morpheus: Ok I am getting a psychiatrist now.
Random cops: WE'RE NOT DEAD YET AND I KNOW HYPNOTISM!
Neo: BAMBAM!
Cypher: That's it Neo . . . hehehehhehehe go ahead and destroy Zion for me!
Trinity: Cypher are you planning to destroy Zion?
Cypher: Um, err, I me-, ye- I mean no. N-n-n-n-ye-NO.
Trinity: Oh good I was a bit suspicious.
Cypher: Just 2 more days till I sabotage it all . . . hehehehehheheehhehehehhehehe. .. .
Trinity: Cypher you need a vacation.
Neo: I KNOW JUST THE PLACE
Cypher: Really?
Neo: IT HAS LOTS OF NUDE WOMEN!
Cypher: I can't think of any catch . . .
(Neo throws Cypher into the ship)
Random Nude Women: WE HATE MEN KILL HIM!
Cypher: This wasn't in the brochure!
RNW: (Charge holding lots of torches, pitchforks, and tons of guns)
Cypher: I am so going back to the Matrix . . .
In the Matrix:
Cypher: This steak is so juicy because the Matrix is sending a message to my brain that it is purple and juicy and firm like your boobs.
Agent: This is why they told me not to get the sex-change surgery. Alright, you kill someone and I send you back to the matrix.
Cypher: Easy enough. (Pulls out nuke and bombs Iraq)
Sadaam Hussein: Oh those damn Americans are at it again.
Agent: *Sigh* The architect lives in Iraq . ..
Cypher: He was getting executed tomorrow anyway.
Agent: Why?
Cypher: Breathing.
Agent: One screwed up country . . .
In the Nebuchanezzar:
Morpheus: Oh damn we ran out of battery power! Lets go to Iraq and get some manual labor.
Neo: Cypher blew it up.
Morpheus: I knew he was trouble!
Energizer Bunny: Here's a AA. Never use Duracell again dammit!
Morpheus: Lets get you to Oracle.
Trinity: Don't you mean the Oracle?
Morpheus: Oh crap I was gonna get my computer fixed!
Dozer and Tank: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH(Getting electrocuted)