Never Lose Me
Chapter One: Strange
A/N: I do not own J.K. Rowling's marvelous story and characters. The only character I own is Rhane(pronounced 'Rain'). BTW, this story opens as a student with a crush that is more than it seems, and the chapters will eventually lead to a 20-something woman with one.^___^ The song is my own. I wrote it. ^_^ It's a slow song, by the way, and pauses a lot.very melodramatic and moody.^_^ It was written for another purpose.but it fit the story well.
'Do you think I'm not gonna make it? (repeat 3x) I won't make it without.you.. Do you think that I can't take it? (repeat 3x) I won't take it without you. Do you think I'm fakin' these feelings? I can't fake loving you.. Can't fake it. (repeat 3x) No,no. I will never lose this love. Do you think I'm gonna lose it? (repeat 3x) I can never lose it. You will never lose me. Do you think I don't mean it? (repeat 3x) I swear I do mean it. You will never..lose me. Even when horror knocks on my door. Even when I can't stop the pain. Even when this depression takes me deeper than ever before. You are the only light that keeps me alive. You will never lose me.'
The young woman walked softly down the halls to her next class, Advanced Potions. She both loved and dreaded it, and her reasons were all focused on its' teacher, Severus Snape. The girl shook her head softly, trying not to think. The 7th year Gryffindor should have hated the class completely, with fervor, as the others did. But this one didn't. She didn't remember exactly when she had felt those feelings first...she couldn't remember a time at Hogwarts when she hadn't experienced them. Running one small hand through waist-length brown hair she sighed, and opened the door, quietly taking her seat. She knew that he hated the Gryffindors like herself, which had gotten even worse since Harry Potter had came to Hogwarts in her second year. But there was an air of mystery about the man that she, always attracted to darkness in a way that she'd always thought would make her a Slytherin, found fascinating. Perhaps she should have been a Slytherin, he favored them. Her large green eyes focused suddenly upon the door to class.
"Ah. Miss Jiyn." Came a cold voice from the door. Rhane nodded a greeting, and then began to study her desk. ' Early again.Always early.' The Professor wondered about the odd Gryffindor who constantly tried to blend into anonymity. Shaking his head, he sat down at his desk and waited for the rest of the students. He suddenly realized just how strange this might look to someone who didn't know better- a male professor and a young female student, alone in the class. 'Why does that send an odd ring of truth through me? I would never do anything with a child like her-especially a Gryffindor child.would I?' Shaking his mind free of such disturbing thoughts, he wondered if he had eaten something that was affecting his intelligence. After all, such thoughts would never be suspected of one such as the Potions Master. Shaking his head again, he promptly 'forgot' them.
Rhane kept having dreams...they were more than dreams, she knew. More like a cross between premonitions and past-life remembrances. In them, she was herself and someone else at the same time, and always with Snape, though it wasn't always his name. She remembered him as Salazar Slytherin, for one. The girl Rhane was experiencing things as if she was a girl named Rithia Alger, and had been the first one expected to be a Slytherin, and when sorted into Gryffindor by Godric and the others' decision, her past life's lover, Salazar, left. She remembered her tears...and the discovery that she was pregnant with not only an illegitimate child, but an illegitimate Founder's child, and she but a student. The dream had been too vivid to forget and too intoxicating to ignore. Her emerald eyes flamed in remembrance. Then a sharp noise awoke her. Snape had just slammed his hand down on her desk. The lesson was mid-way over, and she was supposed to have begun her potion.
"Most unlike you, Miss Jiyn." He said quietly, almost sarcastically. Loudly, he spoke so the class could hear. "Detention, and twenty points from Gryffindor." He turned and continued his rounds as tears stung Rhane's glistening eyes. She was crying both because of the soft, cruel tone of his words to her, and because of the hatred he showed all Gryffindors.
As the brunette exited the class, tears pooled in her deep eyes, she ran into someone. A very slender, cruel someone.
"So...crying in class, eh, Jiyn?" Draco Malfoy drawled evilly, then leaned closer. "I know your little secret. I know all about what you feel when you see Professor Snape. And don't you forget it." Smirking, he turned, snapped his fingers for his cronies, who appeared instantly, and was on his way, leaving a torn and devastated Rhane behind.
That night, Rhane dreamed a disturbing dream yet again, though different than the previous dream. This time she was a princess, the daughter of a powerful, temperamental king. Snape was her father's Court Wizard, and she could feel the burn of his dark eyes upon her everywhere she went. One day, the princess-her((as in the princess which Rhane was experiencing things as)) realized she could use magic. Frightened, the princess fled into the arms of the wizard, and a very strange intrigue began. Keeping the relationship secret was difficult enough...but when her father betrothed her to a strange, pale young man with a lecherous, malicious sneer, she refused to deny anything any longer. She attempted to flee with her lover and witnessed the most tragic thing of all...on the steps of the Royal Palace, she was trapped by two guards as he was stabbed to death.reaching for her.the flame in those inky eyes dying out... She saw, then, her bitter tears...the elaborate wedding to the cruel young king of another land...she saw herself bear a child...not the blonde's...a dark haired, dark eyed, olive-skinned child that was obviously the wizard's. She saw herself, distraught, give the boy to a trustable, loving servant, and then saw herself with a dagger...one that the wizard had once given her, all silver-toned and dotted with red gems. She saw herself look longingly at the dagger...then she was in the highest tower in the palace...just as she plunged it into her heart, the blonde who was her husband entered, and his sneer turned to a look of pure shock and twisted hatred. The dream seemed to last an eternity and an instant, all at once.
Rhane awoke from the dream drenched in sweat and salty tears. She had begun to notice something, though. In every dream, she bore Snape's child...and then, due to death or other circumstances, they were separated from one another. Did this mean something? If it did, its' meaning frightened her. "Why do I dream such odd dreams about you, Severus Snape?" the confused girl whispered, too quietly to wake the other girls in her dorm, who generally avoided her anyway, due to her 'wierdness.'
Walking to the Great Hall, she kept thinking about the blonde in her dream. Now that Rhane really considered it, he was always in her dreams, as well, just as Snape was...but the young man was always the antagonist, rather than the protagonist. Rhane could not shake the feeling that his face was very familiar, and finally she stored the information in a little corner of her brain and sat down in the corner of Gryffindor table nearest to Slytherin table. She ate breakfast rapidly and left for her first class of the day, Advanced Transfiguration. The brunette girl sat down quietly and opened her textbook, studying the day's lesson. It looked difficult, especially to someone whose mind was in the Potions dungeon, with another Professor altogether. Her mind kept wandering, and finally she shut the book. Rhane needed something to do...Looking around, she saw that the rest of the class was here, which seemed odd. Very odd and definitely ominous. She was never really early to this class and there were always some others here when she arrived, but now, they were all here and the room was full. Professor McGonagall stood at the center of the room and began to go over the lesson.
"Today, we will be learning how to transfigure a deadly plant into a harmless object. Yes, you will decide what to transform it into, just be sure it's harmless." She produced the plant, which was obviously highly poisonous, as she had on anti-poison gloves as well as something similar to a gas mask. She then gave out the same equipment-gloves and mask-to every student, and then set a small plant on each desk. Unhappily, Rhane began the task. Forty-five minutes later, her plant was only slightly different, while everyone else's had begun to take on another shape. She forced herself to think of something harmless-a potions bottle, yes, that was it...Suddenly, she began to hear whispers and giggles around her. Looking down, Rhane saw why immediately. Instead of a bottle, her plant had taken a noticeably different form-that of Professor Snape's head. Tears stung her eyes again, but she continued working, even when the teacher raised an eyebrow and asked the girl if she simply didn't think Snape was dangerous. She replied that she thought he was, but that his head alone wouldn't be, after all, being disembodied. This caused more laughter, and even a slight twitch at Professor McGonagall's mouth. Rhane was thankful indeed when the class ended, and she melted back into anonymity...until noon, when Malfoy once again approached her in the hall.
"So...transfiguring dangerous plants to look like Snape? Tut, tut...you'll give your secret away..." He sneered. "My father always said your family was a misfit lot...always mooning over teachers and such...your mother, for instance, was said to have a crush on one of her professors...Of course, she didn't marry him or anything. But you...my father says you're a born Slytherin, put in the wrong house. I don't agree with him...your foolishness is Gryffindor, through and through." The blonde laughed cruelly.
"Don't you every listen to anyone but your father?" Rhane retorted sharply, then turned and vanished into the hall that led to the Gryffindor Common Room before the tears could be seen. She had never known that her mother had loved a Professor...never...
That night was fraught with the bewildering dreams, as well. This time, Rhane was the daughter of a wealthy man in a small peasant village. Snape was a man who lived near her, and a practitioner of magic, though only she knew it, for he was training her in the same arts, despite the desperate fear the commoners had of the stuff. They grew closer and closer, until their meetings were not restrained to merely spells and other such things. They planned to run away and wed in a faraway city he had once visited. Just as she discovered she was pregnant, the witch-hunters arrived. They sought Snape out and took him to the village square, declaring that he would have a trial. She ran forward, wishing to die with him, claiming she, too, was a witch, but he, to her horror, denied it all. Yet, even so, she saw the love in his dark eyes, so cleverly concealed, and heard the silent plea to care for his child when he was gone. She saw that he was resigned to his fate, and tears sprang to her eyes as she fell to the ground. He was killed, drowned without the chance to cast a spell or use an herb to save himself. She was so deeply rooted in sorrow that even her marriage to the son of the Mayor, a slim, silver- blonde young man with a permanent sneer, didn't faze her. When her son was born, however, she saw the fear and anger in his eyes as he realized who the child's father was, and she took the child and ran away in the night. The dream faded, and Rhane woke up. 'Again.that blonde.always there to bring me more pain, always there to discover my child wasn't his. Why?' She sighed, the feeling of déjà vu a bit too close for comfort. The young woman wondered-just what was in store for her? Were these just dreams? Were they prophecies...or past lives? Rhane sat down at her desk in Advanced Divination, praying that the stares she was receiving had nothing to do with the Snape-plant...though she had a feeling they did, unfortunately. 'Just let me live through Potions class later today.' She prayed.
Authors' Note: Updating and editing this story.^_^lol.oh, and I'm sure most people can feel affinity with Rhane a bit-ever done anything HORRIBLY embarrassing and have EVERYONE know, and just want the day to end? I have.repeatedly, in fact.lol^_^
Chapter One: Strange
A/N: I do not own J.K. Rowling's marvelous story and characters. The only character I own is Rhane(pronounced 'Rain'). BTW, this story opens as a student with a crush that is more than it seems, and the chapters will eventually lead to a 20-something woman with one.^___^ The song is my own. I wrote it. ^_^ It's a slow song, by the way, and pauses a lot.very melodramatic and moody.^_^ It was written for another purpose.but it fit the story well.
'Do you think I'm not gonna make it? (repeat 3x) I won't make it without.you.. Do you think that I can't take it? (repeat 3x) I won't take it without you. Do you think I'm fakin' these feelings? I can't fake loving you.. Can't fake it. (repeat 3x) No,no. I will never lose this love. Do you think I'm gonna lose it? (repeat 3x) I can never lose it. You will never lose me. Do you think I don't mean it? (repeat 3x) I swear I do mean it. You will never..lose me. Even when horror knocks on my door. Even when I can't stop the pain. Even when this depression takes me deeper than ever before. You are the only light that keeps me alive. You will never lose me.'
The young woman walked softly down the halls to her next class, Advanced Potions. She both loved and dreaded it, and her reasons were all focused on its' teacher, Severus Snape. The girl shook her head softly, trying not to think. The 7th year Gryffindor should have hated the class completely, with fervor, as the others did. But this one didn't. She didn't remember exactly when she had felt those feelings first...she couldn't remember a time at Hogwarts when she hadn't experienced them. Running one small hand through waist-length brown hair she sighed, and opened the door, quietly taking her seat. She knew that he hated the Gryffindors like herself, which had gotten even worse since Harry Potter had came to Hogwarts in her second year. But there was an air of mystery about the man that she, always attracted to darkness in a way that she'd always thought would make her a Slytherin, found fascinating. Perhaps she should have been a Slytherin, he favored them. Her large green eyes focused suddenly upon the door to class.
"Ah. Miss Jiyn." Came a cold voice from the door. Rhane nodded a greeting, and then began to study her desk. ' Early again.Always early.' The Professor wondered about the odd Gryffindor who constantly tried to blend into anonymity. Shaking his head, he sat down at his desk and waited for the rest of the students. He suddenly realized just how strange this might look to someone who didn't know better- a male professor and a young female student, alone in the class. 'Why does that send an odd ring of truth through me? I would never do anything with a child like her-especially a Gryffindor child.would I?' Shaking his mind free of such disturbing thoughts, he wondered if he had eaten something that was affecting his intelligence. After all, such thoughts would never be suspected of one such as the Potions Master. Shaking his head again, he promptly 'forgot' them.
Rhane kept having dreams...they were more than dreams, she knew. More like a cross between premonitions and past-life remembrances. In them, she was herself and someone else at the same time, and always with Snape, though it wasn't always his name. She remembered him as Salazar Slytherin, for one. The girl Rhane was experiencing things as if she was a girl named Rithia Alger, and had been the first one expected to be a Slytherin, and when sorted into Gryffindor by Godric and the others' decision, her past life's lover, Salazar, left. She remembered her tears...and the discovery that she was pregnant with not only an illegitimate child, but an illegitimate Founder's child, and she but a student. The dream had been too vivid to forget and too intoxicating to ignore. Her emerald eyes flamed in remembrance. Then a sharp noise awoke her. Snape had just slammed his hand down on her desk. The lesson was mid-way over, and she was supposed to have begun her potion.
"Most unlike you, Miss Jiyn." He said quietly, almost sarcastically. Loudly, he spoke so the class could hear. "Detention, and twenty points from Gryffindor." He turned and continued his rounds as tears stung Rhane's glistening eyes. She was crying both because of the soft, cruel tone of his words to her, and because of the hatred he showed all Gryffindors.
As the brunette exited the class, tears pooled in her deep eyes, she ran into someone. A very slender, cruel someone.
"So...crying in class, eh, Jiyn?" Draco Malfoy drawled evilly, then leaned closer. "I know your little secret. I know all about what you feel when you see Professor Snape. And don't you forget it." Smirking, he turned, snapped his fingers for his cronies, who appeared instantly, and was on his way, leaving a torn and devastated Rhane behind.
That night, Rhane dreamed a disturbing dream yet again, though different than the previous dream. This time she was a princess, the daughter of a powerful, temperamental king. Snape was her father's Court Wizard, and she could feel the burn of his dark eyes upon her everywhere she went. One day, the princess-her((as in the princess which Rhane was experiencing things as)) realized she could use magic. Frightened, the princess fled into the arms of the wizard, and a very strange intrigue began. Keeping the relationship secret was difficult enough...but when her father betrothed her to a strange, pale young man with a lecherous, malicious sneer, she refused to deny anything any longer. She attempted to flee with her lover and witnessed the most tragic thing of all...on the steps of the Royal Palace, she was trapped by two guards as he was stabbed to death.reaching for her.the flame in those inky eyes dying out... She saw, then, her bitter tears...the elaborate wedding to the cruel young king of another land...she saw herself bear a child...not the blonde's...a dark haired, dark eyed, olive-skinned child that was obviously the wizard's. She saw herself, distraught, give the boy to a trustable, loving servant, and then saw herself with a dagger...one that the wizard had once given her, all silver-toned and dotted with red gems. She saw herself look longingly at the dagger...then she was in the highest tower in the palace...just as she plunged it into her heart, the blonde who was her husband entered, and his sneer turned to a look of pure shock and twisted hatred. The dream seemed to last an eternity and an instant, all at once.
Rhane awoke from the dream drenched in sweat and salty tears. She had begun to notice something, though. In every dream, she bore Snape's child...and then, due to death or other circumstances, they were separated from one another. Did this mean something? If it did, its' meaning frightened her. "Why do I dream such odd dreams about you, Severus Snape?" the confused girl whispered, too quietly to wake the other girls in her dorm, who generally avoided her anyway, due to her 'wierdness.'
Walking to the Great Hall, she kept thinking about the blonde in her dream. Now that Rhane really considered it, he was always in her dreams, as well, just as Snape was...but the young man was always the antagonist, rather than the protagonist. Rhane could not shake the feeling that his face was very familiar, and finally she stored the information in a little corner of her brain and sat down in the corner of Gryffindor table nearest to Slytherin table. She ate breakfast rapidly and left for her first class of the day, Advanced Transfiguration. The brunette girl sat down quietly and opened her textbook, studying the day's lesson. It looked difficult, especially to someone whose mind was in the Potions dungeon, with another Professor altogether. Her mind kept wandering, and finally she shut the book. Rhane needed something to do...Looking around, she saw that the rest of the class was here, which seemed odd. Very odd and definitely ominous. She was never really early to this class and there were always some others here when she arrived, but now, they were all here and the room was full. Professor McGonagall stood at the center of the room and began to go over the lesson.
"Today, we will be learning how to transfigure a deadly plant into a harmless object. Yes, you will decide what to transform it into, just be sure it's harmless." She produced the plant, which was obviously highly poisonous, as she had on anti-poison gloves as well as something similar to a gas mask. She then gave out the same equipment-gloves and mask-to every student, and then set a small plant on each desk. Unhappily, Rhane began the task. Forty-five minutes later, her plant was only slightly different, while everyone else's had begun to take on another shape. She forced herself to think of something harmless-a potions bottle, yes, that was it...Suddenly, she began to hear whispers and giggles around her. Looking down, Rhane saw why immediately. Instead of a bottle, her plant had taken a noticeably different form-that of Professor Snape's head. Tears stung her eyes again, but she continued working, even when the teacher raised an eyebrow and asked the girl if she simply didn't think Snape was dangerous. She replied that she thought he was, but that his head alone wouldn't be, after all, being disembodied. This caused more laughter, and even a slight twitch at Professor McGonagall's mouth. Rhane was thankful indeed when the class ended, and she melted back into anonymity...until noon, when Malfoy once again approached her in the hall.
"So...transfiguring dangerous plants to look like Snape? Tut, tut...you'll give your secret away..." He sneered. "My father always said your family was a misfit lot...always mooning over teachers and such...your mother, for instance, was said to have a crush on one of her professors...Of course, she didn't marry him or anything. But you...my father says you're a born Slytherin, put in the wrong house. I don't agree with him...your foolishness is Gryffindor, through and through." The blonde laughed cruelly.
"Don't you every listen to anyone but your father?" Rhane retorted sharply, then turned and vanished into the hall that led to the Gryffindor Common Room before the tears could be seen. She had never known that her mother had loved a Professor...never...
That night was fraught with the bewildering dreams, as well. This time, Rhane was the daughter of a wealthy man in a small peasant village. Snape was a man who lived near her, and a practitioner of magic, though only she knew it, for he was training her in the same arts, despite the desperate fear the commoners had of the stuff. They grew closer and closer, until their meetings were not restrained to merely spells and other such things. They planned to run away and wed in a faraway city he had once visited. Just as she discovered she was pregnant, the witch-hunters arrived. They sought Snape out and took him to the village square, declaring that he would have a trial. She ran forward, wishing to die with him, claiming she, too, was a witch, but he, to her horror, denied it all. Yet, even so, she saw the love in his dark eyes, so cleverly concealed, and heard the silent plea to care for his child when he was gone. She saw that he was resigned to his fate, and tears sprang to her eyes as she fell to the ground. He was killed, drowned without the chance to cast a spell or use an herb to save himself. She was so deeply rooted in sorrow that even her marriage to the son of the Mayor, a slim, silver- blonde young man with a permanent sneer, didn't faze her. When her son was born, however, she saw the fear and anger in his eyes as he realized who the child's father was, and she took the child and ran away in the night. The dream faded, and Rhane woke up. 'Again.that blonde.always there to bring me more pain, always there to discover my child wasn't his. Why?' She sighed, the feeling of déjà vu a bit too close for comfort. The young woman wondered-just what was in store for her? Were these just dreams? Were they prophecies...or past lives? Rhane sat down at her desk in Advanced Divination, praying that the stares she was receiving had nothing to do with the Snape-plant...though she had a feeling they did, unfortunately. 'Just let me live through Potions class later today.' She prayed.
Authors' Note: Updating and editing this story.^_^lol.oh, and I'm sure most people can feel affinity with Rhane a bit-ever done anything HORRIBLY embarrassing and have EVERYONE know, and just want the day to end? I have.repeatedly, in fact.lol^_^