Never Lose Me
Chapter Fifteen: Lines
A/N: Yet again, I do not own J.K. Rowling's marvelous story and characters. The only character I own is Rhane (pronounced 'Rain'). BTW, this story opens as a student with a crush that is more than it seems, and the chapters will eventually lead to a 20-something woman with one.^___^ This song is also my own, as are the others. I wrote it. ^_^ It's a slow song, as all the ones for this story are, and pauses a lot.very melodramatic and moody and possibly sad, even. A bit twisted, too-and kinda long. lol^_^ Please review, and if you must criticize, do it CONSTRUCTIVELY, k? Nothing like, 'oh, Snape's ICKY, no girl would ever go after him.' Or anything like that, k? K. ^_^ Yay for the White Stripes!! Bought 'White Blood Cells' the other day, it's inspiring me to write. ^_^_^ Happiness o'doooooom! ^_____^ Oh, yes, and in this fic, Draco isn't exactly EVIL, per say.just very, very disturbed, twisted, obsessed and sadistic. ^_^. ^_^'^_^YES it's disturbing, and YES it'll probably get worse.^_^' Please don't review and tell me I'm sick or anything for any of these chapters-after all, it would seem quite silly to have Draco be sadistic and all and not try anything like that on Rhane, you know. Besides, if you've gotten this far, you must not really mind disturbingness. ^_^ Oh, and all poems in these stories, I wrote. ^_^ ALSO----IT IS ACTUALLY DECEMBER IN THESE LAST FEW CHAPTERS. O_o Whee, I love writing about characters with MPD!! ((Multiple Personality Disorder))^__________^' Aargh. I hate disagreements, don't you? Oh well, at least I got it out of my system. Wow. This is a good song. :listens:
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THANK YOU :
The-m-chick: Your story is sooo great!! Hope mine is interesting, there's a lot of psychoanalysis in this story, in case anyone noticed. Growing up with a psychiatrist/physician for a guardian tends to mean you learn a bit about it. Not necessarily a lot, but I always listen to my granddad, and therefore tend to accidentally add these things to my stories.^_^' Thanks for reviewing and continuing to read my disturbing story!^____^
Lady Juleya: Thanks for being one of my first reviewers!^_^
Aelis: You, too!^__________^
Marvin: thanks!!!^_______^
Clara: THANK YOU!!^_^
Helena Darjeeling: THANKS!^__^
HEN: Encouragement much appreciated!^___^
Sabby: Yay! Glad you liked it!^______^ Hope you're still reading!^_^
Little One: Reinforcement is GREAT!^_______^
Sarah: YAY!^________^Thanks for reviewing, you know you're one of my best friends. One of the few who'll put up with my weird freakishness and my disturbing, over-emotional ways.
Amiella Rogue:THANKS! ^____^Still reading the story?
RoseFyre: YAY! Thanks so much!! And you seem to keep coming back!^________^:is happy: Glad people like my twisted story-ness of doooom!^_^_^'
Piper: Thanks!^_^new readers are great!!!^_^
Aelf: THANKS!^________^:happiness of doom:
LCM: Thanks for reviewing, and for allowing me to explain that aspect of the story. ^_^ Do read on, please?
Also, for my friend Velandar, thank you SO much for reading!^_______________^
THANK ALL OF YOU FOR REVIEWING, IT REALLY ENCOURAGES ME!^_________^
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'Feels like I'm drowning under everything Pressure pushing me one way, heart another. Those who live in glass houses should not at others stones fling. Wonder if this keeps up if I'll smother?
Can't see, can't think, all I can do is feel, And sometimes that's not enough, because those feelings are only pain, It's then when I know that my fate has an unbroken seal, Then when I know that upon my head shall fall eternal rain.
Hurt blends into tears, Tasting salt and experiencing everything as if hollow. I can't even tell you all of my fears, In them and in the depths of my mind I wallow.
Trapped on the barbed wire there, Cut, bruised, beaten and still coming back for more. Seems that every eye knows, every eye holds a stare, Today what's in store?
Facing each day is torture, I feel as if I can't go on sometimes. Then I remember that life would be hard pressed to be any crueler, And the bell in my mind chimes.
Things-will they get better, or stay the same? They can't get too much worse. All of my emotions, my passions, at once inflame. Sometimes I wish my life would go in reverse.'
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Rhane felt her mind swirl in a mix of emotions as she awoke the day of the Yule Ball. The other girls that inhabited this section of the dormitory were downstairs or eating, the ones that were downstairs standing around with the guys they planned to attend the Ball with, snogging passionately, no doubt. Slowly, she stood and stared at herself in the mirror. The scratches on her cheek were gone, but the place which had been bitten twice on her neck had a bruise, and she was almost afraid to look at her back, which Rhane knew was still welted. Sighing, the Gryffindor went down to breakfast in the Common Room, knowing that she should have a good meal before she tried to get ready. The Yule Ball wouldn't be as big of an affair as it had two years ago, in her fifth year, she knew. Still, the brunette would have felt wrong somehow if she hadn't done as much as possible to make herself look nice. Rhane gulped her food down and ran to the showers---and baths, of course.
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Draco watched her go with an eerie, almost unblinking gaze.
"Um, Draco? Are you alright?" A puzzled-looking Crabbe asked in a bewildered voice.
'Am I alright? AM I alright?! I probably couldn't be less alright, but--- somehow---they wouldn't understand. Bloody idiots, both of them. I'll just say yes, whether or not it's true doesn't matter.'
"Of course." The silvery-blonde snapped with a drawl. "What else would I be?"
Crabbe and Goyle both shrugged and began to eat a second helping of eggs-a portion that was large enough to feed at least ten grown men, not showing any signs of stopping at that much, either.
Draco sighed and held a hand to his forehead, closing his eyes in frustration. 'What shall I do? Wait at the portrait of the Fat Lady that leads to Gryffindor Common Room, I suppose. Why does it seem life never has anything on my side? She WILL be my escort, though, whatever she may have planned.'
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Snape mixed his potions, acting for all the world as if nothing was any different about this day that any other. He sighed repeatedly, becoming more and more frustrated with himself, letting his mind get the better of him.
'Stop thinking about her. NOW.' 'Easier said than done, my friend, you should know that by now.' 'But I WILL stop---I WILL.' 'We'll see.'
The hours seemed to fly by as day darkened into evening, the sky tinted with the glorious hues of the sunset.
Draco Malfoy glanced at the approaching dusk from his window as he dressed. Slowly, he pulled the clothes on and fastened them, careful when pulling something on that would cross the path of welts, scrapes, cuts or bruises. Wincing repeatedly, he finally managed to outfit himself in the new attire his father had sent specifically for the Yule Ball. Sighing, the silvery- haired boy gave a slight smirk, full of cruelty and cunning. He knew that she WOULD be his partner in this, whether or not she wished it or not.
************************************************************************
Rhane stepped to the mirror in only her underthings. Carefully pinning her hair back temporarily so as to more easily dress, the Gryffindor girl picked up the amazing dress robe. It was so beautiful, and almost made her smile before she remembered---she wouldn't be able to leave the Common Room without running into Draco. Slowly, Rhane pulled on the dress, feeling the silken lining, on the inside of the velvet-looking layer, brush her skin, feeling ever-so-wonderfully soft. She already had sheer hose on, and now donned the small black shoes, then the silvery star earrings. Almost without meaning to, the brunette picked up the necklace and began to fasten it around her neck. It was an involuntary act, but it was too late now---it was on, and she had to admit, it did look very nice, even though it was a rose and the rest of the theme seemed to be stars. Rhane took down her hair and brushed it out, then put it up in a braid which she circled in a flat bun-like crown on her head, leaving a few whisps out in front of the ears for delicacy. She smiled at herself in the mirror---makeup had been applied earlier, right after the bath, and it still was holding fast. ******************************************************************
Sighing, Rhane walked out of the Gryffindor Common Room---and was completely shocked. Draco stood there, of course, no such luck as to have him forget---but he looked so DIFFERENT. The dress robes he wore looked elegant, as if from another time period completely-one of jousting, princesses, and knights. He looked absolutely amazing, she had to admit--- but a few things gave him away. First, she could see the end of a welt across the collarbone right as it disappeared into the shirt, second, the cruel smirk that lit his face in horrible ways was upon his face---she knew which side was here tonight. Shivering slightly, the brunette felt Draco grab her arm and arrange his grip in a way that, to onlookers, would look quite gallant and gentlemanly-had they only known the pain this form of grip created, they would have felt differently.
******************************************************************
As they entered the Yule Ball, several raised eyebrows and a few whispers greeted them. Rhane allowed her eyes to search the crowd until she found Snape---over in a dark corner alone. Their gazes connected, and she felt the powerful line between them again. Draco smiled cruelly down at her and leaned to whisper in her ear.
"No use looking for HIM, love. You're mine, and mine alone, forever now. You don't REALLY think I'll let you have a dance with HIM? Come now." His brow furrowed. "Well, maybe one dance, but not more than that, that is for certain. So choose your song wisely---that one dance with him is all you'll get. But first---let us go get some punch." He led Rhane over to the refreshment table, where he picked up two glasses of punch and carried them over to a table. Slowly, eyes on her at all times, Draco drank his punch. Rhane gulped and blushed slightly as their eyes met---why did she feel some sort of line between them, too? It made no sense!---and she quickly looked back into her drink.
Finally, a slower song played, and Draco leapt up, pulling Rhane to her feet. "And now, my dear, we dance. I get the first dance, no other." So saying, he swept her into a waltz, his nails cutting into her intentionally as they danced, his eyes always on hers. Although it was beginning to hurt slightly, she had to admit that he was a superb dancer---probably trained since birth or something, she thought bitterly.
Eventually, after dancing four slower songs, Rhane decided to dance her one dance with Snape. Draco watched her go with amusement and bitterness reflected in his eyes. 'Why does she always choose to take whatever time she can with HIM? She's MINE now-I love her, and she's mine. No one can EVER take her away. MINE.' He held a hand to his forehead and downed half a mug of butterbeer. A few other girls, some Slytherins, approached him to ask for a dance, but he turned them down. Rhane was the only person he intended to dance with, though he would allow her, just this once, a dance with the Potions Master she so dearly loved in all her lives. This time, though, Draco swore that HE, not Snape, would win. He drank the rest of the butterbeer and headed back for another.
Author's Note: Sorry the chapter's short, I'll try and write a longer one later.^__________^No, the Yule Ball isn't over with this chapter, there's more to come.
Chapter Fifteen: Lines
A/N: Yet again, I do not own J.K. Rowling's marvelous story and characters. The only character I own is Rhane (pronounced 'Rain'). BTW, this story opens as a student with a crush that is more than it seems, and the chapters will eventually lead to a 20-something woman with one.^___^ This song is also my own, as are the others. I wrote it. ^_^ It's a slow song, as all the ones for this story are, and pauses a lot.very melodramatic and moody and possibly sad, even. A bit twisted, too-and kinda long. lol^_^ Please review, and if you must criticize, do it CONSTRUCTIVELY, k? Nothing like, 'oh, Snape's ICKY, no girl would ever go after him.' Or anything like that, k? K. ^_^ Yay for the White Stripes!! Bought 'White Blood Cells' the other day, it's inspiring me to write. ^_^_^ Happiness o'doooooom! ^_____^ Oh, yes, and in this fic, Draco isn't exactly EVIL, per say.just very, very disturbed, twisted, obsessed and sadistic. ^_^. ^_^'^_^YES it's disturbing, and YES it'll probably get worse.^_^' Please don't review and tell me I'm sick or anything for any of these chapters-after all, it would seem quite silly to have Draco be sadistic and all and not try anything like that on Rhane, you know. Besides, if you've gotten this far, you must not really mind disturbingness. ^_^ Oh, and all poems in these stories, I wrote. ^_^ ALSO----IT IS ACTUALLY DECEMBER IN THESE LAST FEW CHAPTERS. O_o Whee, I love writing about characters with MPD!! ((Multiple Personality Disorder))^__________^' Aargh. I hate disagreements, don't you? Oh well, at least I got it out of my system. Wow. This is a good song. :listens:
************************************************************************
THANK YOU :
The-m-chick: Your story is sooo great!! Hope mine is interesting, there's a lot of psychoanalysis in this story, in case anyone noticed. Growing up with a psychiatrist/physician for a guardian tends to mean you learn a bit about it. Not necessarily a lot, but I always listen to my granddad, and therefore tend to accidentally add these things to my stories.^_^' Thanks for reviewing and continuing to read my disturbing story!^____^
Lady Juleya: Thanks for being one of my first reviewers!^_^
Aelis: You, too!^__________^
Marvin: thanks!!!^_______^
Clara: THANK YOU!!^_^
Helena Darjeeling: THANKS!^__^
HEN: Encouragement much appreciated!^___^
Sabby: Yay! Glad you liked it!^______^ Hope you're still reading!^_^
Little One: Reinforcement is GREAT!^_______^
Sarah: YAY!^________^Thanks for reviewing, you know you're one of my best friends. One of the few who'll put up with my weird freakishness and my disturbing, over-emotional ways.
Amiella Rogue:THANKS! ^____^Still reading the story?
RoseFyre: YAY! Thanks so much!! And you seem to keep coming back!^________^:is happy: Glad people like my twisted story-ness of doooom!^_^_^'
Piper: Thanks!^_^new readers are great!!!^_^
Aelf: THANKS!^________^:happiness of doom:
LCM: Thanks for reviewing, and for allowing me to explain that aspect of the story. ^_^ Do read on, please?
Also, for my friend Velandar, thank you SO much for reading!^_______________^
THANK ALL OF YOU FOR REVIEWING, IT REALLY ENCOURAGES ME!^_________^
************************************************************************
'Feels like I'm drowning under everything Pressure pushing me one way, heart another. Those who live in glass houses should not at others stones fling. Wonder if this keeps up if I'll smother?
Can't see, can't think, all I can do is feel, And sometimes that's not enough, because those feelings are only pain, It's then when I know that my fate has an unbroken seal, Then when I know that upon my head shall fall eternal rain.
Hurt blends into tears, Tasting salt and experiencing everything as if hollow. I can't even tell you all of my fears, In them and in the depths of my mind I wallow.
Trapped on the barbed wire there, Cut, bruised, beaten and still coming back for more. Seems that every eye knows, every eye holds a stare, Today what's in store?
Facing each day is torture, I feel as if I can't go on sometimes. Then I remember that life would be hard pressed to be any crueler, And the bell in my mind chimes.
Things-will they get better, or stay the same? They can't get too much worse. All of my emotions, my passions, at once inflame. Sometimes I wish my life would go in reverse.'
************************************************************************
Rhane felt her mind swirl in a mix of emotions as she awoke the day of the Yule Ball. The other girls that inhabited this section of the dormitory were downstairs or eating, the ones that were downstairs standing around with the guys they planned to attend the Ball with, snogging passionately, no doubt. Slowly, she stood and stared at herself in the mirror. The scratches on her cheek were gone, but the place which had been bitten twice on her neck had a bruise, and she was almost afraid to look at her back, which Rhane knew was still welted. Sighing, the Gryffindor went down to breakfast in the Common Room, knowing that she should have a good meal before she tried to get ready. The Yule Ball wouldn't be as big of an affair as it had two years ago, in her fifth year, she knew. Still, the brunette would have felt wrong somehow if she hadn't done as much as possible to make herself look nice. Rhane gulped her food down and ran to the showers---and baths, of course.
************************************************************************
Draco watched her go with an eerie, almost unblinking gaze.
"Um, Draco? Are you alright?" A puzzled-looking Crabbe asked in a bewildered voice.
'Am I alright? AM I alright?! I probably couldn't be less alright, but--- somehow---they wouldn't understand. Bloody idiots, both of them. I'll just say yes, whether or not it's true doesn't matter.'
"Of course." The silvery-blonde snapped with a drawl. "What else would I be?"
Crabbe and Goyle both shrugged and began to eat a second helping of eggs-a portion that was large enough to feed at least ten grown men, not showing any signs of stopping at that much, either.
Draco sighed and held a hand to his forehead, closing his eyes in frustration. 'What shall I do? Wait at the portrait of the Fat Lady that leads to Gryffindor Common Room, I suppose. Why does it seem life never has anything on my side? She WILL be my escort, though, whatever she may have planned.'
************************************************************************
Snape mixed his potions, acting for all the world as if nothing was any different about this day that any other. He sighed repeatedly, becoming more and more frustrated with himself, letting his mind get the better of him.
'Stop thinking about her. NOW.' 'Easier said than done, my friend, you should know that by now.' 'But I WILL stop---I WILL.' 'We'll see.'
The hours seemed to fly by as day darkened into evening, the sky tinted with the glorious hues of the sunset.
Draco Malfoy glanced at the approaching dusk from his window as he dressed. Slowly, he pulled the clothes on and fastened them, careful when pulling something on that would cross the path of welts, scrapes, cuts or bruises. Wincing repeatedly, he finally managed to outfit himself in the new attire his father had sent specifically for the Yule Ball. Sighing, the silvery- haired boy gave a slight smirk, full of cruelty and cunning. He knew that she WOULD be his partner in this, whether or not she wished it or not.
************************************************************************
Rhane stepped to the mirror in only her underthings. Carefully pinning her hair back temporarily so as to more easily dress, the Gryffindor girl picked up the amazing dress robe. It was so beautiful, and almost made her smile before she remembered---she wouldn't be able to leave the Common Room without running into Draco. Slowly, Rhane pulled on the dress, feeling the silken lining, on the inside of the velvet-looking layer, brush her skin, feeling ever-so-wonderfully soft. She already had sheer hose on, and now donned the small black shoes, then the silvery star earrings. Almost without meaning to, the brunette picked up the necklace and began to fasten it around her neck. It was an involuntary act, but it was too late now---it was on, and she had to admit, it did look very nice, even though it was a rose and the rest of the theme seemed to be stars. Rhane took down her hair and brushed it out, then put it up in a braid which she circled in a flat bun-like crown on her head, leaving a few whisps out in front of the ears for delicacy. She smiled at herself in the mirror---makeup had been applied earlier, right after the bath, and it still was holding fast. ******************************************************************
Sighing, Rhane walked out of the Gryffindor Common Room---and was completely shocked. Draco stood there, of course, no such luck as to have him forget---but he looked so DIFFERENT. The dress robes he wore looked elegant, as if from another time period completely-one of jousting, princesses, and knights. He looked absolutely amazing, she had to admit--- but a few things gave him away. First, she could see the end of a welt across the collarbone right as it disappeared into the shirt, second, the cruel smirk that lit his face in horrible ways was upon his face---she knew which side was here tonight. Shivering slightly, the brunette felt Draco grab her arm and arrange his grip in a way that, to onlookers, would look quite gallant and gentlemanly-had they only known the pain this form of grip created, they would have felt differently.
******************************************************************
As they entered the Yule Ball, several raised eyebrows and a few whispers greeted them. Rhane allowed her eyes to search the crowd until she found Snape---over in a dark corner alone. Their gazes connected, and she felt the powerful line between them again. Draco smiled cruelly down at her and leaned to whisper in her ear.
"No use looking for HIM, love. You're mine, and mine alone, forever now. You don't REALLY think I'll let you have a dance with HIM? Come now." His brow furrowed. "Well, maybe one dance, but not more than that, that is for certain. So choose your song wisely---that one dance with him is all you'll get. But first---let us go get some punch." He led Rhane over to the refreshment table, where he picked up two glasses of punch and carried them over to a table. Slowly, eyes on her at all times, Draco drank his punch. Rhane gulped and blushed slightly as their eyes met---why did she feel some sort of line between them, too? It made no sense!---and she quickly looked back into her drink.
Finally, a slower song played, and Draco leapt up, pulling Rhane to her feet. "And now, my dear, we dance. I get the first dance, no other." So saying, he swept her into a waltz, his nails cutting into her intentionally as they danced, his eyes always on hers. Although it was beginning to hurt slightly, she had to admit that he was a superb dancer---probably trained since birth or something, she thought bitterly.
Eventually, after dancing four slower songs, Rhane decided to dance her one dance with Snape. Draco watched her go with amusement and bitterness reflected in his eyes. 'Why does she always choose to take whatever time she can with HIM? She's MINE now-I love her, and she's mine. No one can EVER take her away. MINE.' He held a hand to his forehead and downed half a mug of butterbeer. A few other girls, some Slytherins, approached him to ask for a dance, but he turned them down. Rhane was the only person he intended to dance with, though he would allow her, just this once, a dance with the Potions Master she so dearly loved in all her lives. This time, though, Draco swore that HE, not Snape, would win. He drank the rest of the butterbeer and headed back for another.
Author's Note: Sorry the chapter's short, I'll try and write a longer one later.^__________^No, the Yule Ball isn't over with this chapter, there's more to come.