Chapter Two: Face-to-Face
A/N: I'd like to apologize for the delay with this chapter. I've been so busy finishing other stories that I neglected this one! Thank you to everyone who's waited patiently for this chapter, and I'll try to get more chapters out sooner now! Also, thank you very much to everyone who reviewed. Your support means a lot to me! -Molli
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The room I stepped into was admittedly smaller than my suite of rooms at Farthy, but I knew I would rather be in this less luxurious room than an any room in Farthingale Manor.
I surveyed the room, and concluded that although it was cramped, it wasn't a bad room at all. The double bed had a warm-looking comforter spread across it, and two fluffy pillows were tucked beneath that comforter. A chest of drawers stood against one corner, and a nightstand stood by the other side of the bed. There was a small lamp on both the nightstand and the chest.
There was one large, bay window on the far left side of the room, and I crossed the room to look out the window. It was early afternoon, and the streets weren't very crowded. Today was Saturday and I had been gone from Winnerrow long enough that I didn't remember what its residents did Saturday afternoons.
Suddenly, the infamous jet lag caught up with me. The flight hadn't been that long, but I was tired, both from physical stress and emotional stress. I set my alarm clock for five o'clock and crawled under the blanket.
In moments, I was asleep.
If I dreamed, I didn't remember the dreams when I woke. The room didn't come into focus immediately, because it had been light outside when I had went to sleep, and now it was dark outside. I sat up and looked at the small clock. I had slept through the alarm- it was 9:30. Much too late to go to the cabin. I groaned with disappointment, and then got out of bed.
The hotel had a small restaurant- nothing fancy, mind you- but I knew it would do for a quick dinner. The sign said it was open until 10:30, and I knew I would have time to eat something. I slipped on a pair of shoes and brushed my hair, grabbed my room key and put in inside my purse, and then walked out of the room. I locked the door behind me and took the elevator down to the lobby.
The hamburger and French fries weren't the best I had ever had, but to me, they were very good. The sweet iced tea tasted like none I had ever had, and I savored it all.
I went back up to my room and sat by the window, looking out. The sky was clear and starry and I focused on the first star I saw. It was childish, I knew, to wish on a star, but if anyone needed a wish to come true, I did, I thought.
I wish that Luke and Heaven will accept me back into their lives and that this reunion will go smoothly.
Was that too much to hope for? I wondered as I changed into pajamas and got back into bed.
I would know tomorrow, I realized, as despite my five-hour nap, I drifted off to sleep.
_________
The following day was a Sunday. I had thought about attending Winnerrow's local church service, but finally decided to go straight to the cabin in the Willies. I wanted to do so before I lost my nerve.
I showered, dressed and dried my hair. I hadn't dressed up, I hadn't wanted to put on airs for my meeting with my Winnerrow family. I had never done so in the past and I didn't want to start pretending to be someone I wasn't now.
I ate a quick breakfast in the hotel restaurant, then took what I needed from my hotel room, left, and locked the door. A few moments later, I was in my car and headed to the steep, curving road that would take me to my destination.
The windows were rolled down and I took in great gulps of the fresh air. My palms were sweating so much that my grasp on the steering wheel was slick. My whole body felt shaky, and I felt as though I had drank several cups of black coffee, when I hadn't had any.
What would happen today? I wondered. Would Luke be overjoyed to see me…had he missed me as much as I had missed him? Maybe he had missed me more- after all, he believed I was dead. He had had to learn to move on and wasn't expecting to ever see me again. Undoubtedly, his love for me had been tucked away in a part of his heart few others saw, whereas my love for him was still aching to be nourished into the real love I had always dreamed of sharing with my husband… I wanted the kind of relationship with Luke now that we had begun to have when we had been married…before my supposed death.
Was that still possible?
Or was I simply fooling myself into believing it was?
I made the final turn, my thoughts and questions overwhelming me, and then pulled up in front of the house that wasn't much more than a shack. It was home to me once, I thought. Maybe it still can be home.
I climbed out of the car and shut the door, then took a long look at the cabin. The little house had been obviously old and small before, but now it looked dilapidated…as though no one cared for it anymore.
The grass had been allowed to grow a bit longer than Luke liked it to be, and some children's toys lay scattered in the yard. But the two rocking chairs Ma and Pa had sat in to rock were still sitting firmly on the sagging porch. The sight of those two chairs- something familiar despite how my life had changed- sent a surge of renewed hope
through me.
Slowly but purposefully, I walked up the few steps to the porch. My hands shook as I knocked two loud raps on the wooden door. And then I waited for someone to answer the door.
And waited.
Finally, after almost two minuets, I knocked again. I looked at the simple gold watch I wore. It was eight thirty- surely they weren't sleeping this late, I thought to myself.
Still, no one answered the door. Dejected, I turned to go. I took the first step and an aching seemed to fill my soul.
I'll come back later, I thought. Maybe they went to church after all.
Yes, I could come back later. I could try again.
Just then, the door creaked open. I whirled around and gazed at the woman who stood in front of me. I didn't have to guess at who she was- for I still remembered my first sight of Annie Brandywine Casteel over four years ago.
She hadn't changed really, only the addition of a few more wrinkles marked her face and let me know she had indeed aged.
Neither of us spoke. The lump in my throat was growing larger, and I wondered if perhaps she thought she was seeing a ghost. I wouldn't blame her for doubting what her eyes were showing her, I thought.
Finally, her dark eyes wide, she spoke.
"Angel?" Her voice quavered with disbelief but like the rockers and the cabin, it was familiar. Safe. Comforting.
"Angel, is it really you?"
All I could manage was a nod. I tried to compose myself.
"Yes, Ma, it's really me."
She stared at me in wonder.
"How? T' doctors told us ya were dead…killed birthin' Heaven."
I nodded again.
"I know, Ma. I didn't die, I was in a comma. They took me to the hospital. The doctors tried to tell Luke that I hadn't died, but I think he was too grief-stricken to listen to any reason then.
"Tony Tatterton and my mother were contacted, and they took me back to Boston. They kept me there until I turned 18."
"Tony- yer stepfather- and yer Momma?"
"Yes."
Ma shook her head, as though all this was too fantastic for her to believe. I still could barely believe it all myself. All of it seemed like a life someone I knew had lived- not a life I had lived.
"I know it sounds like something out a movie," I continued, "but it's all true," I quickly added. "Because I wasn't a legal adult, I had to live with them. My daddy tried to get custody of me, or at least let me come back here, but Momma and Tony told the judge that my marriage to Luke wasn't legal. I didn't have anything to prove it was legal, even though it was. And Daddy couldn't get custody of me. I had to remain at Farthinggale Manor until I turned 18.
"After that, I worked to save up my own money, and started college. I wanted to make sure Momma and Tony knew I was not going to be a part of their lives anymore, and then I'd come back here. And now…I'm back."
Annie sat down in the nearby rocking chair and closed her eyes for a long moment. Then, she looked up at me.
"Come here," she whispered. I moved closer to her. She reached out a thin hand and touched me, and then quickly jerked her hand back. "Yer real," she murmured, appearing shocked. It had taken her touching me to convince her this was no dream, no joke.
"And very much alive," I added, smiling.
I sat in the chair next to her.
"I know it's hard to believe, but it all really happened."
"I remember what ya told us of thet Tony Tatterton and yer mother. It sure sounds like somethin' they would do," she muttered, angrily.
Then she reached out and touched my hand again.
"Tell me the whole story, startin' from t' beginning and not leavin' out anything'," she requested.
"Shouldn't I wait to tell Luke and Pa the whole story?" I asked softly, gently.
"Luke and t' others went ta church this mornin' an' they won't be back fer anotha
hour or so." She told me.
"Oh," I said softly. I couldn't help but feel disappointed, and thought that if I had gone with my instinct and gone to church this morning I would have most likely have already seen Luke and Heaven.
But I was here now and I might as well make the most of this time with Annie.
I wanted to tell the whole story when I was with her, Luke and Pa, but I knew that I would have plenty of time to re-tell the story.
So I told Ma everything, and didn't leave out anything. I told her my first memories of waking up in a Boston hospital, of realizing where I was and of my first meeting with Tony and Momma in that hospital. I recounted what they had told me- and the ultimatum they had given me: live with them or they would make sure Heaven was taken from Luke and given up for adoption.
It had been too painful to recall that particular memory earlier but now, with Ma's presence nearby, I could speak about that day for the first time in years.
I continued with the story, the tale of my imprisionment at Farthy, of the rest of my high-school years, of how I had longed to return here…how I had missed Luke, Heaven, Pa and Ma. I even told Ma about young Troy.
She listened to everything I had to say, and when I cried, she didn't try to stop me. She just patted my back and let me cry.
The last time I had cried was the day Tony had caught me trying to run away again. I had vowed not to cry anymore, but rather to become strong and determined…strong enough to vanquish even Tony!
But now I let the tears come freely and then when the worst was over, I dried my eyes and turned to Ma.
"So, now you know everything," I said softly.
Well, not everything, I thought. Ma still didn't know that Heaven was really Tony's daughter- and if I had my way, no one but Luke would ever know! I didn't want to bring my daughter up in the world I had left. I wanted to bring her up here, where she was safe. That's all I had wanted when I married Luke…that and to be happy with Luke.
Fate had taken all that away from me but now…
Now I hoped to reclaim what I had lost.
"Yes, now I know everythin'," Ma said softly, almost disbelievingly. "It's still so hard ta believe, Angel, thet you're alive an' here. It's like a miracle," she continued, with a tremulous smile.
"I know just what you mean," I said and gently squeezed the hand she had rested over mine. "But I'm back for good, Ma! Don't you see- Luke and I can remarry if we need to, raise Heaven…we can still have the life we had begun four years ago!"
Ma looked at me, but didn't speak. A troubled look came into her eyes, and I leaned forward.
"Can't we?" I asked, urgently. "I know this is all unbelievable and a wild act of Fate, but can't Luke and I start over and make a family? I still love him, Ma, as much as I ever did…maybe more now! And I've missed him and Heaven every day since I left. I've dreamed of nothing but coming back here, and now I'm finally back!" I cried.
Still, Annie didn't speak and I felt something dark and cold- something like fear- push some of my elation out of the way.
What was wrong here? Could Heaven or Luke be sick? Could something have happened to Heaven?
No, No, I cried silently. I wouldn't permit myself to think that! Not now, when I was finally back where I belonged!
Finally, Ma spoke.
"Angel, some thins' have changed since ya been gone," she said gently.
"That's okay," I replied, desperate for her not to say what I thought she was going to say. "Whatever has happened, Luke and I can triumph over it. I know we can!"
"Leigh," Ma said softly, and for her to call me by my given name, it must be serious, I thought, panicked, "Luke has…well…he's…" She trailed off, as though telling me was too great a shock. What could be so wrong?
Just then, the truck I knew was Luke's pulled up in the yard.
Ma stood.
"Luke's married again," she blurted.
I stood there, frozen. It hurt to breathe and I didn't trust myself to move or speak. Luke had remarried? No, that wasn't part of the plan! I hadn't let myself think about that possibility…I had wanted to believe Luke still loved me enough to…
To what? Chase after a dream that would, for him, never come true? Hold onto a love he believed was dead?
I knew it made sense for Luke to marry, to give Heaven a mother and yet still I could say nothing.
But I didn't have to say anything, because just then the truck doors opened and Luke and Pa got out, followed by two young children and a red-haired woman holding a sleeping baby.
I felt as though time slowed down as they approached the spot where I stood with Annie. Everything went into slow-motion and the few steps it took to get to the porch became giant leaps in my mind.
And then, Luke walked to where I stood and stopped. He took a long look at me, into my blue eyes and didn't say a word. And I…I couldn't say anything.
Finally, after four years I was face-to-face with Luke Casteel…only this reunion wasn't turning out to be anything like I had hoped it would be.
A/N: I'd like to apologize for the delay with this chapter. I've been so busy finishing other stories that I neglected this one! Thank you to everyone who's waited patiently for this chapter, and I'll try to get more chapters out sooner now! Also, thank you very much to everyone who reviewed. Your support means a lot to me! -Molli
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The room I stepped into was admittedly smaller than my suite of rooms at Farthy, but I knew I would rather be in this less luxurious room than an any room in Farthingale Manor.
I surveyed the room, and concluded that although it was cramped, it wasn't a bad room at all. The double bed had a warm-looking comforter spread across it, and two fluffy pillows were tucked beneath that comforter. A chest of drawers stood against one corner, and a nightstand stood by the other side of the bed. There was a small lamp on both the nightstand and the chest.
There was one large, bay window on the far left side of the room, and I crossed the room to look out the window. It was early afternoon, and the streets weren't very crowded. Today was Saturday and I had been gone from Winnerrow long enough that I didn't remember what its residents did Saturday afternoons.
Suddenly, the infamous jet lag caught up with me. The flight hadn't been that long, but I was tired, both from physical stress and emotional stress. I set my alarm clock for five o'clock and crawled under the blanket.
In moments, I was asleep.
If I dreamed, I didn't remember the dreams when I woke. The room didn't come into focus immediately, because it had been light outside when I had went to sleep, and now it was dark outside. I sat up and looked at the small clock. I had slept through the alarm- it was 9:30. Much too late to go to the cabin. I groaned with disappointment, and then got out of bed.
The hotel had a small restaurant- nothing fancy, mind you- but I knew it would do for a quick dinner. The sign said it was open until 10:30, and I knew I would have time to eat something. I slipped on a pair of shoes and brushed my hair, grabbed my room key and put in inside my purse, and then walked out of the room. I locked the door behind me and took the elevator down to the lobby.
The hamburger and French fries weren't the best I had ever had, but to me, they were very good. The sweet iced tea tasted like none I had ever had, and I savored it all.
I went back up to my room and sat by the window, looking out. The sky was clear and starry and I focused on the first star I saw. It was childish, I knew, to wish on a star, but if anyone needed a wish to come true, I did, I thought.
I wish that Luke and Heaven will accept me back into their lives and that this reunion will go smoothly.
Was that too much to hope for? I wondered as I changed into pajamas and got back into bed.
I would know tomorrow, I realized, as despite my five-hour nap, I drifted off to sleep.
_________
The following day was a Sunday. I had thought about attending Winnerrow's local church service, but finally decided to go straight to the cabin in the Willies. I wanted to do so before I lost my nerve.
I showered, dressed and dried my hair. I hadn't dressed up, I hadn't wanted to put on airs for my meeting with my Winnerrow family. I had never done so in the past and I didn't want to start pretending to be someone I wasn't now.
I ate a quick breakfast in the hotel restaurant, then took what I needed from my hotel room, left, and locked the door. A few moments later, I was in my car and headed to the steep, curving road that would take me to my destination.
The windows were rolled down and I took in great gulps of the fresh air. My palms were sweating so much that my grasp on the steering wheel was slick. My whole body felt shaky, and I felt as though I had drank several cups of black coffee, when I hadn't had any.
What would happen today? I wondered. Would Luke be overjoyed to see me…had he missed me as much as I had missed him? Maybe he had missed me more- after all, he believed I was dead. He had had to learn to move on and wasn't expecting to ever see me again. Undoubtedly, his love for me had been tucked away in a part of his heart few others saw, whereas my love for him was still aching to be nourished into the real love I had always dreamed of sharing with my husband… I wanted the kind of relationship with Luke now that we had begun to have when we had been married…before my supposed death.
Was that still possible?
Or was I simply fooling myself into believing it was?
I made the final turn, my thoughts and questions overwhelming me, and then pulled up in front of the house that wasn't much more than a shack. It was home to me once, I thought. Maybe it still can be home.
I climbed out of the car and shut the door, then took a long look at the cabin. The little house had been obviously old and small before, but now it looked dilapidated…as though no one cared for it anymore.
The grass had been allowed to grow a bit longer than Luke liked it to be, and some children's toys lay scattered in the yard. But the two rocking chairs Ma and Pa had sat in to rock were still sitting firmly on the sagging porch. The sight of those two chairs- something familiar despite how my life had changed- sent a surge of renewed hope
through me.
Slowly but purposefully, I walked up the few steps to the porch. My hands shook as I knocked two loud raps on the wooden door. And then I waited for someone to answer the door.
And waited.
Finally, after almost two minuets, I knocked again. I looked at the simple gold watch I wore. It was eight thirty- surely they weren't sleeping this late, I thought to myself.
Still, no one answered the door. Dejected, I turned to go. I took the first step and an aching seemed to fill my soul.
I'll come back later, I thought. Maybe they went to church after all.
Yes, I could come back later. I could try again.
Just then, the door creaked open. I whirled around and gazed at the woman who stood in front of me. I didn't have to guess at who she was- for I still remembered my first sight of Annie Brandywine Casteel over four years ago.
She hadn't changed really, only the addition of a few more wrinkles marked her face and let me know she had indeed aged.
Neither of us spoke. The lump in my throat was growing larger, and I wondered if perhaps she thought she was seeing a ghost. I wouldn't blame her for doubting what her eyes were showing her, I thought.
Finally, her dark eyes wide, she spoke.
"Angel?" Her voice quavered with disbelief but like the rockers and the cabin, it was familiar. Safe. Comforting.
"Angel, is it really you?"
All I could manage was a nod. I tried to compose myself.
"Yes, Ma, it's really me."
She stared at me in wonder.
"How? T' doctors told us ya were dead…killed birthin' Heaven."
I nodded again.
"I know, Ma. I didn't die, I was in a comma. They took me to the hospital. The doctors tried to tell Luke that I hadn't died, but I think he was too grief-stricken to listen to any reason then.
"Tony Tatterton and my mother were contacted, and they took me back to Boston. They kept me there until I turned 18."
"Tony- yer stepfather- and yer Momma?"
"Yes."
Ma shook her head, as though all this was too fantastic for her to believe. I still could barely believe it all myself. All of it seemed like a life someone I knew had lived- not a life I had lived.
"I know it sounds like something out a movie," I continued, "but it's all true," I quickly added. "Because I wasn't a legal adult, I had to live with them. My daddy tried to get custody of me, or at least let me come back here, but Momma and Tony told the judge that my marriage to Luke wasn't legal. I didn't have anything to prove it was legal, even though it was. And Daddy couldn't get custody of me. I had to remain at Farthinggale Manor until I turned 18.
"After that, I worked to save up my own money, and started college. I wanted to make sure Momma and Tony knew I was not going to be a part of their lives anymore, and then I'd come back here. And now…I'm back."
Annie sat down in the nearby rocking chair and closed her eyes for a long moment. Then, she looked up at me.
"Come here," she whispered. I moved closer to her. She reached out a thin hand and touched me, and then quickly jerked her hand back. "Yer real," she murmured, appearing shocked. It had taken her touching me to convince her this was no dream, no joke.
"And very much alive," I added, smiling.
I sat in the chair next to her.
"I know it's hard to believe, but it all really happened."
"I remember what ya told us of thet Tony Tatterton and yer mother. It sure sounds like somethin' they would do," she muttered, angrily.
Then she reached out and touched my hand again.
"Tell me the whole story, startin' from t' beginning and not leavin' out anything'," she requested.
"Shouldn't I wait to tell Luke and Pa the whole story?" I asked softly, gently.
"Luke and t' others went ta church this mornin' an' they won't be back fer anotha
hour or so." She told me.
"Oh," I said softly. I couldn't help but feel disappointed, and thought that if I had gone with my instinct and gone to church this morning I would have most likely have already seen Luke and Heaven.
But I was here now and I might as well make the most of this time with Annie.
I wanted to tell the whole story when I was with her, Luke and Pa, but I knew that I would have plenty of time to re-tell the story.
So I told Ma everything, and didn't leave out anything. I told her my first memories of waking up in a Boston hospital, of realizing where I was and of my first meeting with Tony and Momma in that hospital. I recounted what they had told me- and the ultimatum they had given me: live with them or they would make sure Heaven was taken from Luke and given up for adoption.
It had been too painful to recall that particular memory earlier but now, with Ma's presence nearby, I could speak about that day for the first time in years.
I continued with the story, the tale of my imprisionment at Farthy, of the rest of my high-school years, of how I had longed to return here…how I had missed Luke, Heaven, Pa and Ma. I even told Ma about young Troy.
She listened to everything I had to say, and when I cried, she didn't try to stop me. She just patted my back and let me cry.
The last time I had cried was the day Tony had caught me trying to run away again. I had vowed not to cry anymore, but rather to become strong and determined…strong enough to vanquish even Tony!
But now I let the tears come freely and then when the worst was over, I dried my eyes and turned to Ma.
"So, now you know everything," I said softly.
Well, not everything, I thought. Ma still didn't know that Heaven was really Tony's daughter- and if I had my way, no one but Luke would ever know! I didn't want to bring my daughter up in the world I had left. I wanted to bring her up here, where she was safe. That's all I had wanted when I married Luke…that and to be happy with Luke.
Fate had taken all that away from me but now…
Now I hoped to reclaim what I had lost.
"Yes, now I know everythin'," Ma said softly, almost disbelievingly. "It's still so hard ta believe, Angel, thet you're alive an' here. It's like a miracle," she continued, with a tremulous smile.
"I know just what you mean," I said and gently squeezed the hand she had rested over mine. "But I'm back for good, Ma! Don't you see- Luke and I can remarry if we need to, raise Heaven…we can still have the life we had begun four years ago!"
Ma looked at me, but didn't speak. A troubled look came into her eyes, and I leaned forward.
"Can't we?" I asked, urgently. "I know this is all unbelievable and a wild act of Fate, but can't Luke and I start over and make a family? I still love him, Ma, as much as I ever did…maybe more now! And I've missed him and Heaven every day since I left. I've dreamed of nothing but coming back here, and now I'm finally back!" I cried.
Still, Annie didn't speak and I felt something dark and cold- something like fear- push some of my elation out of the way.
What was wrong here? Could Heaven or Luke be sick? Could something have happened to Heaven?
No, No, I cried silently. I wouldn't permit myself to think that! Not now, when I was finally back where I belonged!
Finally, Ma spoke.
"Angel, some thins' have changed since ya been gone," she said gently.
"That's okay," I replied, desperate for her not to say what I thought she was going to say. "Whatever has happened, Luke and I can triumph over it. I know we can!"
"Leigh," Ma said softly, and for her to call me by my given name, it must be serious, I thought, panicked, "Luke has…well…he's…" She trailed off, as though telling me was too great a shock. What could be so wrong?
Just then, the truck I knew was Luke's pulled up in the yard.
Ma stood.
"Luke's married again," she blurted.
I stood there, frozen. It hurt to breathe and I didn't trust myself to move or speak. Luke had remarried? No, that wasn't part of the plan! I hadn't let myself think about that possibility…I had wanted to believe Luke still loved me enough to…
To what? Chase after a dream that would, for him, never come true? Hold onto a love he believed was dead?
I knew it made sense for Luke to marry, to give Heaven a mother and yet still I could say nothing.
But I didn't have to say anything, because just then the truck doors opened and Luke and Pa got out, followed by two young children and a red-haired woman holding a sleeping baby.
I felt as though time slowed down as they approached the spot where I stood with Annie. Everything went into slow-motion and the few steps it took to get to the porch became giant leaps in my mind.
And then, Luke walked to where I stood and stopped. He took a long look at me, into my blue eyes and didn't say a word. And I…I couldn't say anything.
Finally, after four years I was face-to-face with Luke Casteel…only this reunion wasn't turning out to be anything like I had hoped it would be.