Title: Agent Smith Considers A Career Change Part 2
Rating: PG because I don't want to ever own a G fic.
Disclaimer: Characters aren't mine, I am not to be held responsible for the following: hallucinations, disturbing dreams and/or any other mental images.
A/N: Don't ask. I'm sick and I've had Cherry Coke. Yes, I have been told this is disturbing but then again, so am I. I am going to continue this because I love poking fun at Smith and I haven't forgotten about my other fics, I'm just slow/lazy. :-P
Part II - Of Scissors and Hair
Agent Smith walked stealthily down the crowded city street. His highly polished shoes making a path through the crowd as his eyes behind the sunglasses searched for any wandering rebels.
Out of the corner of his eye, a sign grasped Smith's attention. In brightly sparkly letters there shone a sign which read "Neo-Style: We Cut Hair, Wax, Pierce And Manicure!"
That word, Neo. It filled him with an anger he wasn't meant to feel, he was a program and therefore feelings were something he need not be burdened with. But it was there, the anger welled up inside him like a storm until he felt the enormous need to punch something, preferably another rebel.
Normally Smith would have kept walking but this time was different. He was compelled to stay and inspect this building. Carefully he stepped closer to the pink abomination and was horrified by what he saw.
An overweight woman sat in one of the chairs, her blonde hair hanging limply, dripping with water. Smith watched entranced as one of the hairdressers, a bubbly looking girl dressed in a pink apron, started to snip at the womans hair with a pair of sharp looking scissors. He watched as the hairdresser clumsily cut the womans hair. If there was one thing Smith could not stand it was people doing things wrong.
Quickly analyzing the situation, Agent Smith decided to take matters (or in this case, scissors) into his own hands. Casually he stepped inside the Saloon and was immediately smothered by the putrid smell of shampoo and some cheap perfume. Ignoring the stinging pain in his eyes he walked over to where were the blonde woman sat in the chair and pushed the hairdresser abruptly out of the way,
"Out of my way, human." Smith spat at her.
"Wha…What are you doing?" She stammered.
Smith merely sneered at her, ignoring her protests and threats. Meanwhile the lady in the chair seemed oblivious to what was going on around her, actually it seemed as though she had fallen asleep.
Smith looked at her for awhile, immersed in thought. He stared at her for what seemed minutes before he finally started to cut the woman's hair. His cuts were precise and slowly a fashionable hair style seemed to immerge from the wet blonde mass that was.
Smith smiled to himself, this was actually more fun than he thought it would be.
As Smith made the last snip he looked at his creation and was filled with an overwhelming pride. The woman now had a hair cut identical to his, complete with receding hair line.
Smith handed the woman and watched as she looked at her reaction in the little mirror. The womans face turned pale, than green and than finally a bright shade of red.
"What the hell? What have you done to my hair?! Are you even a real hairdresser!?!?" The woman screeched at Smith.
Smith seem unperturbed. "You humans never had an eye for style in the first place." And with that he pushed the woman out of the shop. The little bell tinkling as the door slammed shut.
Smith looked around and to his surprise he saw that he was the only person left. All the customers seemed to have left and the rest of the staff seemed to be hiding.
Was he really that bad? He though. No, he told himself. He was a great hairdresser. It was the humans who were stupid and oblivious to style and with that he also exited Neo-Style, his mind filled with visions of his own hair saloon. Stylin' Smith. Hmmm….he thought, that was a catchy name for a buisness.
Maybe it was time for a career change, he thought as he observed the unflattering hair cuts around him.
A/N: It was lame and short in my opinion but I hope you liked it. Please read and review.