The One With The Indecent Proposal

By: Jana~

Chapter Fifteen

***************

--"We shouldn't be doing this," Monica mumbled against Chandler's lips, her protests weak. "Your friends…"

"Are asleep," he mumbled back. "They could sleep through anything," he added, his lips finding her neck; his warm breath was a welcome sensation in the cold of the room. "One time, Joey actually fell asleep during an audition."

"Audition?" she asked, breathless, arching into his kisses as her fingernails raked up his arm.

"He's an actor," he answered, a winded whisper, his hand sliding into her hair.

"Would I know him?" Her heart wasn't really invested in the answer, her head spinning from the affection he doted on her.

"Days Of Our Lives," he said simply, his kisses hungrier.

Suddenly pulling away, her eyes wide, she exclaimed quietly, "Dr Drake Ramoray!"

Chandler forced a polite smile, his breath ragged.

"I thought I recognized him from somewhere," she whispered, peeking over her shoulder at the man being discussed as he slept uncomfortably.

His expression seemed almost pained as he asked, "You a fan?" The cold air stung and dried out his throat as he struggled to breathe normally.

It wasn't hard to see where his thoughts had been. What he was assuming. "No. My friend, Rachel is. Big soap opera fan." That revelation caused a change in Chandler's façade. "I'm not interested in Joey," she told him sincerely. "I'm interested in you, Chandler."

Cold fingertips grazing her skin, inching beneath her robe caused a warmth to spread from deep inside. "I am so captivated by you, Monica. And I don't want to scare you, by moving too fast. Especially now, with all this," he added as he glanced at the cage bars, "But, I really feel something for you."

"Do you believe in love at first sight?" There was no hint to her feelings on the issue showing in her tone or demeanor.

Honestly, he answered with, "I didn't used to."

With a slight nod she asked, "But now?"

"The moment I saw you," he whispered, "I started to believe."

A deep sigh escaped, her heart racing from his touch. "It doesn't seem so cold in here now," she whispered; she had never felt so aroused, so dizzy with desire, by such simple contact.

"Um, guys?" Monica and Chandler both startled at the sound of Joey's voice. "Sorry to interrupt, but, just so you know…" his eyes remained closed as he spoke, "I'm actually awake."

"How long have you been listening to us?" Chandler asked, sounding slightly cross, slightly amused.

Eyes fluttering open, he guiltily said, "Since Monica asked if you believed in love at first sight."

"Me, since she told you that Rachel is a soap opera fan," Phoebe admitted, her eyes opening as she spoke.

Hiding a smile, Monica looked at Chandler. "So much for the 'they could sleep through anything' theory."

"You guys are making a great impression here," Chandler scolded them.

"I wasn't eavesdropping on purpose!" Phoebe insisted defensively.

"See?" Joey exclaimed. "It can happen even though you don't mean it to!"

"I just wasn't sure if I should say something and interrupt," Phoebe continued, "Or keep my mouth shut and give you guys some privacy."

"Which is hard to do," Joey added, "Seeing as how we're in the same stupid cage together."

"Now, sweetie," Phoebe corrected, "The cage isn't stupid, my sister is."

"Speaking of," Chandler interjected, "We haven't seen her in a while."

"My legs are asleep," Joey muttered, wiggling uncomfortably.

Phoebe, realizing near immediately that she was the cause of his discomfort, struggled to stand. "Oh, eeesh, I'm sorry!"

"Your legs are probably asleep too, huh?" Monica asked Chandler, not waiting for his answer before moving off his lap; she shuddered when her skin made contact with the cold ground.

"It's colder than a witches tit in here," Phoebe announced, and they all shot her an odd look. "My grandma used to say that," she explained.

"My grandma used to say, it's cold enough to hang meat," Monica shared, wrapping her arms tightly around herself.

Chandler groaned, catching everyone's attention. "Pins and needles! Pins and needles!"

"I like that feeling," Phoebe admitted. "It's like, pain and pleasure mixed."

Still suffering, Chandler made a face, his antics almost comical as he corrected his friend. "No, it's like pain and pain, period!"

"It's because it's so cold," Monica interjected. "That it hurts that much."

"I think you guys had the right idea," Joey stated, shaking and rubbing his legs to get the blood flowing again. "Making out warms you up."

Monica laughed, "It's like a bad porno movie! C'mon, baby," she cooed, pretending to be acting out a scene from an adult movie, "It's so cold, and we have nothing better to do."

It happened before the final words were even out of Monica's mouth. Suddenly, like a lightbulb moment, it all became clear as crystal.

"Oh my God, I know! I know how Ursula did this!"

***

--"Where do you suppose everyone is?" Rachel asked, following Ross closely.

"Who's everyone?" He whispered his question as he opened a door and peeked inside.

"Monica, Chandler, the friend…"

Spinning around to face her, he asked, "What friend?"

"She said there was a friend," Rachel explained. "He was part of the reason why she passed out."

"Why? What did he do?"

"Nothing. She just wasn't expecting to see him right then, and she was freaking over the dungeon already. It caused her to faint."

"You're sure it was a guy friend?"

"Well, she said 'he' when referring to him. So, yeah, I'm gonna say it's a guy."

The sarcasm in her tone was noted and dismissed, Ross rolling his eyes before opening another door and peering in.

"Oh my God," he whispered, pushing his way in. "Monica was here."

"How do you know?" Rachel asked, fast on his heels.

"Who else would have folded their pajamas so neatly, with the blanket pulled down to just the right angle?" Whipping around, he scanned the room, looking for any other signs that his sister had been there. He gasped, pointing at the dresser. "A woman's evening bag!"

Rachel grabbed his arm, leaning on him as he plucked the purse off the piece of antique furniture and slowly opened it; she gasped as Ross produced a New York license with Monica's picture on it.

"She wouldn't have left without her purse!" Rachel hissed.

"Which means she's still here," Ross theorized. "Unless she was dragged off against her will. Dead or alive."

Promptly, she hit him. "Would you stop that!" she snipped. "What the hell is the matter with you?!"

"Freeze!"

Ross and Rachel both spun around, to be faced with a uniformed officer holding a gun.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Please review! And remember… you're not allowed to go through the metaphorical commitment tunnel with more than one person in the car.

MTLBYAKY