Helping Hand
Chapter 10
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Faith watched Emily walk Charlie down the hallway and then let her gaze linger there as she felt Bosco's eyes on her. She didn't really know what to say to him. She was grateful for his help with Charlie, but the anger of all that had happened was still there - although it had faded slightly. She heard him clear his throat as if to remind her that he was still there and slowly, she turned to face him.
"Well, Fred should be at work by now. I'll give him a call and let him know what's going on," she said, not looking him in the eye.
"You want me to stick around? I can take a couple of hours of personal leave if you want me to help you tell Fred. You know, in case he has any questions or, you know, wants to kill me," Bosco said, trying to take some of the seriousness out of the moment.
Faith let a small laugh escape. "No. You've done enough, Bos," she said, realizing that he could have taken that a couple of ways - one of them being as a dig at what had happened to her. She looked quickly back at him to see the hurt expression on his face. "I didn't mean it that way. I mean well..., thanks for helping Charlie out. I just wish he felt like he could talk to us," she clarified, and Bosco noticed the disappointed look on her face.
Bosco looked back at her, still standing near the door. He nodded, "Well, as long as he gets some help now is all that matters. I can kind of understand how he felt. I mean, when my parents were having problems, the last thing I wanted to do was to hit them with more. So, pretty much nothing got solved around my house because my parents were having problems all the time," he added, finishing the thought with a sarcastic chuckle.
"I know," Faith said, remembering the numerous little hints over the years at the hard childhood he'd had. She still remembered the confrontation between Bosco and his mother over the boyfriend that had beat her up - the look of pain on his face as they fought in the middle of the hospital hallway after he'd beat the snot out of the guy. The look of defeat as he walked to the nurses' lounge after she'd said she was going to go back to him and how sad she felt for him. The whole thing gave her a great insight into how he had always reacted to calls for domestic disputes - especially when they involved violence against women.
"So, the doctors say your doing well then?" he asked, breaking the awkward silence again.
"Yeah," Faith answered. "It's just gonna take a while, but they think I should be able to make a good recovery."
"You gonna come back to work?" he asked, not wanting to know what her decision would be about partnering up with him again.
"I don't know. Guess it depends on how much mobility I get back, but I'm trying," she answered.
Bosco nodded. "Well, guess I should get going then," he said, turning to head for the door. "Let me know if you need anything, Faith. I'm just a phone call away - always."
"Yeah, thanks," Faith answered, rolling herself toward the door to see him out.
Suddenly he turned back to her again and they both jumped as she wasn't expecting him to turn back to her and he didn't expect her to be right next to him. "Sorry," he said nervously, pausing as if to decide whether he should say anymore or not. Finally, he decided to just come out with it.
He squatted down next to her. "Look, Faith. I never got the chance to talk to you really after everything happened. I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am about everything that happened. I wish I could take it all back - take the bullet for you.
She interrupted him, "Bos, I just can't talk about this now. I have to get hold of Fred and..., well, I just can't," she repeated, her eyes getting wet.
"You're right," he said, looking down at the floor. "I'm sorry. I just..., I need you to know is all."
"Know what? That mistakes were made - by everyone. I already know, Bos. Look, Emily's right. You didn't make me go into Noble's apartment that night. I'm a big girl. I knew what I was doing. I just don't understand how it all came to that. We always used to talk things out first. I mean, hell, I knew you were a big Romeo from the day we met, always getting caught up in one romance or another, but I'm still trying to figure out when you stopped listening. I could still always talk to you about the job - you still always had your head on straight when it came to that. But, Cruz messed with your head. You fell for her, Bos. Face it. You fell hard for her and that's where the problem was. You asked for advice when things started going sour, but your heart wouldn't let you listen. You could see no wrong with her - took her at her word for everything. Over me. Over me, and our 10+ years together. You broke up the partnership, Bos - broke up the trust. I wish to God that this hadn't happened," she said, sweeping her hand over herself and the wheelchair, "but I also thank God that it wasn't worse - that you didn't get killed in that apartment. Because, I don't know what I would've done, Bos. I don't think I could've handled the fact that I failed - wasn't able to get through to you," she said, tears falling now.
"I'm sorry, Faith. You're right," Bosco said, tears gathering in his eyes as well. "I was blind when it came to Cruz. She had me totally fooled. Totally," he said quietly.
"We weren't working as partners that night. I didn't trust you anymore. I didn't know how you'd react. I didn't know that you were focusing on Noble or I never would have shot my gun. I thought we were reacting to Cruz. That's why I shot. I thought she was drawing down on you, but she was reacting to your reaction to Noble taking his gun out." She said, trying to regain control of her emotions.
They both were silent for a moment. Then, Bosco spoke, "So, what now? When you come back to work, what'll happen?" he asked, almost afraid to hear her answer.
Faith shook her head. "I honestly don't know, Bos. I can't answer that now. Hell, I don't even know if I CAN come back to work. I'm still having a hard time getting over the fact that nothing really happened to Cruz in all of this. She's still working. She's going on as if none of this happened."
It was Bosco's turn to shake his head now. "No, she's not. She's changed. Don't get me wrong," he added quickly at the look on her face that said she thought they were still involved. "We're not together, but I've been forced to work with her on occasion and she's changed. A lot. She's been through more stuff since that night. She got pulled from Anti-Crime and put back into uniform, working the street. Her Anti-Crime team got broken up. She got raped by a perp while she was working undercover at a prostitution ring. She's changed," he said.
They were both silent again. Nothing more to be said right then. After a moment, Bosco stood up. He put a hand on Faith's shoulder as Emily came out from the bedroom. "Well, I gotta get to work unless you need me."
Faith put a hand on his as it rested on her shoulder. "No. Go to work. I'll talk to Fred and we'll get Charlie some help. Thanks again, Bos. I mean it."
Bosco nodded his head and gave Faith's shoulder a squeeze. He looked at Emily, "Bye, Em. Remember, call me if you need anything," he said, looking from Emily to Faith so they both knew he meant it. He opened the door and pulled it closed behind him as he took one last look at his partner.
He stood outside the door for a moment, letting all that was said soak in. He wiped at his eyes and headed to work.
Faith looked at Emily. "You were very good at helping Charlie. Thank you. But, I want you to know that you can come to me about anything - no matter what, okay?"
"Okay, Mom," Emily agreed. "So, are things better with you and Bosco?"
"A little, Em. Whew," Faith said, taking a deep, cleansing breath. "I'm gonna go check on your brother and talk a little. Then I'm gonna call your Dad. You okay for a bit?"
"Yeah, Mom. I'm fine," Emily said, leaning over to hug her mother. She watched as Faith wheeled her chair down the hallway.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TBC...
Chapter 10
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Faith watched Emily walk Charlie down the hallway and then let her gaze linger there as she felt Bosco's eyes on her. She didn't really know what to say to him. She was grateful for his help with Charlie, but the anger of all that had happened was still there - although it had faded slightly. She heard him clear his throat as if to remind her that he was still there and slowly, she turned to face him.
"Well, Fred should be at work by now. I'll give him a call and let him know what's going on," she said, not looking him in the eye.
"You want me to stick around? I can take a couple of hours of personal leave if you want me to help you tell Fred. You know, in case he has any questions or, you know, wants to kill me," Bosco said, trying to take some of the seriousness out of the moment.
Faith let a small laugh escape. "No. You've done enough, Bos," she said, realizing that he could have taken that a couple of ways - one of them being as a dig at what had happened to her. She looked quickly back at him to see the hurt expression on his face. "I didn't mean it that way. I mean well..., thanks for helping Charlie out. I just wish he felt like he could talk to us," she clarified, and Bosco noticed the disappointed look on her face.
Bosco looked back at her, still standing near the door. He nodded, "Well, as long as he gets some help now is all that matters. I can kind of understand how he felt. I mean, when my parents were having problems, the last thing I wanted to do was to hit them with more. So, pretty much nothing got solved around my house because my parents were having problems all the time," he added, finishing the thought with a sarcastic chuckle.
"I know," Faith said, remembering the numerous little hints over the years at the hard childhood he'd had. She still remembered the confrontation between Bosco and his mother over the boyfriend that had beat her up - the look of pain on his face as they fought in the middle of the hospital hallway after he'd beat the snot out of the guy. The look of defeat as he walked to the nurses' lounge after she'd said she was going to go back to him and how sad she felt for him. The whole thing gave her a great insight into how he had always reacted to calls for domestic disputes - especially when they involved violence against women.
"So, the doctors say your doing well then?" he asked, breaking the awkward silence again.
"Yeah," Faith answered. "It's just gonna take a while, but they think I should be able to make a good recovery."
"You gonna come back to work?" he asked, not wanting to know what her decision would be about partnering up with him again.
"I don't know. Guess it depends on how much mobility I get back, but I'm trying," she answered.
Bosco nodded. "Well, guess I should get going then," he said, turning to head for the door. "Let me know if you need anything, Faith. I'm just a phone call away - always."
"Yeah, thanks," Faith answered, rolling herself toward the door to see him out.
Suddenly he turned back to her again and they both jumped as she wasn't expecting him to turn back to her and he didn't expect her to be right next to him. "Sorry," he said nervously, pausing as if to decide whether he should say anymore or not. Finally, he decided to just come out with it.
He squatted down next to her. "Look, Faith. I never got the chance to talk to you really after everything happened. I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am about everything that happened. I wish I could take it all back - take the bullet for you.
She interrupted him, "Bos, I just can't talk about this now. I have to get hold of Fred and..., well, I just can't," she repeated, her eyes getting wet.
"You're right," he said, looking down at the floor. "I'm sorry. I just..., I need you to know is all."
"Know what? That mistakes were made - by everyone. I already know, Bos. Look, Emily's right. You didn't make me go into Noble's apartment that night. I'm a big girl. I knew what I was doing. I just don't understand how it all came to that. We always used to talk things out first. I mean, hell, I knew you were a big Romeo from the day we met, always getting caught up in one romance or another, but I'm still trying to figure out when you stopped listening. I could still always talk to you about the job - you still always had your head on straight when it came to that. But, Cruz messed with your head. You fell for her, Bos. Face it. You fell hard for her and that's where the problem was. You asked for advice when things started going sour, but your heart wouldn't let you listen. You could see no wrong with her - took her at her word for everything. Over me. Over me, and our 10+ years together. You broke up the partnership, Bos - broke up the trust. I wish to God that this hadn't happened," she said, sweeping her hand over herself and the wheelchair, "but I also thank God that it wasn't worse - that you didn't get killed in that apartment. Because, I don't know what I would've done, Bos. I don't think I could've handled the fact that I failed - wasn't able to get through to you," she said, tears falling now.
"I'm sorry, Faith. You're right," Bosco said, tears gathering in his eyes as well. "I was blind when it came to Cruz. She had me totally fooled. Totally," he said quietly.
"We weren't working as partners that night. I didn't trust you anymore. I didn't know how you'd react. I didn't know that you were focusing on Noble or I never would have shot my gun. I thought we were reacting to Cruz. That's why I shot. I thought she was drawing down on you, but she was reacting to your reaction to Noble taking his gun out." She said, trying to regain control of her emotions.
They both were silent for a moment. Then, Bosco spoke, "So, what now? When you come back to work, what'll happen?" he asked, almost afraid to hear her answer.
Faith shook her head. "I honestly don't know, Bos. I can't answer that now. Hell, I don't even know if I CAN come back to work. I'm still having a hard time getting over the fact that nothing really happened to Cruz in all of this. She's still working. She's going on as if none of this happened."
It was Bosco's turn to shake his head now. "No, she's not. She's changed. Don't get me wrong," he added quickly at the look on her face that said she thought they were still involved. "We're not together, but I've been forced to work with her on occasion and she's changed. A lot. She's been through more stuff since that night. She got pulled from Anti-Crime and put back into uniform, working the street. Her Anti-Crime team got broken up. She got raped by a perp while she was working undercover at a prostitution ring. She's changed," he said.
They were both silent again. Nothing more to be said right then. After a moment, Bosco stood up. He put a hand on Faith's shoulder as Emily came out from the bedroom. "Well, I gotta get to work unless you need me."
Faith put a hand on his as it rested on her shoulder. "No. Go to work. I'll talk to Fred and we'll get Charlie some help. Thanks again, Bos. I mean it."
Bosco nodded his head and gave Faith's shoulder a squeeze. He looked at Emily, "Bye, Em. Remember, call me if you need anything," he said, looking from Emily to Faith so they both knew he meant it. He opened the door and pulled it closed behind him as he took one last look at his partner.
He stood outside the door for a moment, letting all that was said soak in. He wiped at his eyes and headed to work.
Faith looked at Emily. "You were very good at helping Charlie. Thank you. But, I want you to know that you can come to me about anything - no matter what, okay?"
"Okay, Mom," Emily agreed. "So, are things better with you and Bosco?"
"A little, Em. Whew," Faith said, taking a deep, cleansing breath. "I'm gonna go check on your brother and talk a little. Then I'm gonna call your Dad. You okay for a bit?"
"Yeah, Mom. I'm fine," Emily said, leaning over to hug her mother. She watched as Faith wheeled her chair down the hallway.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TBC...
