The Return
Friday
He stood in the hallway before her door. Again, he'd come to this place. He'd sworn after last time that he wouldn't do it anymore, that he'd find the strength within to deal with his memories alone and leave her out of it, but still, he had ended up exactly where he began. He paused, hand frozen in a loose fist, almost ready to knock. Almost. He lowered his arm and stepped back, then turned and walked briskly down the hall, into the elevator, and left the building.
She had heard his footsteps stop outside the door and held her breath, waiting. She knew that he was contemplating knocking, and was pleased when he didn't. But then she heard him retreat, and inexplicably regretful, wafted to the window to watch him depart. He crossed the street and unlocked his car, and as he climbed inside she found that she couldn't watch him drive away after all.
~x~
He paused in the hallway and thought of all the reasons why he shouldn't go inside. There were so many of them, each plausible and valid in their own way, and they roared through his mind in a chaotic frenzy. Then a single face appeared in the midst of the maelstrom, an anchor of reason and hope, and he clung to it as everything else faded.
Once again, he'd found that all his promises and self-control counted for nothing against the need he felt for her and the rightness she exuded.
She thought he'd left, but he'd only gone to retrieve something that he finally felt he deserved. He'd surprised them both last week, as he'd sat dripping a stain into her couch. He had beaten his fear and asked for that which he most desired. And against all the odds, she'd given.
His hand trembled slightly as he raised his arm, aware that once he stepped through the door there would be no going back. Because this time he didn't need to knock. This time, he had a key.
End
Friday
He stood in the hallway before her door. Again, he'd come to this place. He'd sworn after last time that he wouldn't do it anymore, that he'd find the strength within to deal with his memories alone and leave her out of it, but still, he had ended up exactly where he began. He paused, hand frozen in a loose fist, almost ready to knock. Almost. He lowered his arm and stepped back, then turned and walked briskly down the hall, into the elevator, and left the building.
She had heard his footsteps stop outside the door and held her breath, waiting. She knew that he was contemplating knocking, and was pleased when he didn't. But then she heard him retreat, and inexplicably regretful, wafted to the window to watch him depart. He crossed the street and unlocked his car, and as he climbed inside she found that she couldn't watch him drive away after all.
~x~
He paused in the hallway and thought of all the reasons why he shouldn't go inside. There were so many of them, each plausible and valid in their own way, and they roared through his mind in a chaotic frenzy. Then a single face appeared in the midst of the maelstrom, an anchor of reason and hope, and he clung to it as everything else faded.
Once again, he'd found that all his promises and self-control counted for nothing against the need he felt for her and the rightness she exuded.
She thought he'd left, but he'd only gone to retrieve something that he finally felt he deserved. He'd surprised them both last week, as he'd sat dripping a stain into her couch. He had beaten his fear and asked for that which he most desired. And against all the odds, she'd given.
His hand trembled slightly as he raised his arm, aware that once he stepped through the door there would be no going back. Because this time he didn't need to knock. This time, he had a key.
End