Chapter 7: The Final Author's Rant (All the RK music I own was used to turn out this final load of drivel)

OK, don't take the final wrong, this ain't the last chapter by a long shot unless I get some massive flames. Instead it is a short skit, featuring me and Sano, of the type I've been shoving on my FOD for months as a way to blow off steam. All is explained, or you could just skip this chapter, because the next one is a biggie, hopefully. Enjoy. Or don't.

*t3h jack is lying in bed. He appears dead.*

Sano: Heya, Jack-kun, there're people out there who wants to know what happens with me and Kennie-poo.

T3h jack: Bugger off. I never have any time to write, I never get to do jack-shit homework, and I might fail English this semester, and if I do THAT than the irony would be a small thermonuclear device to the nuts. PLUS now Koishii is talking about some kid on the bus she thinks is cute, and I'm so godamn sick I feel like bits of me may at any moment fall off, starting with, I dunno, my HEAD. SO THERE! AND SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO CLAW OUT PEOPLE'S THROATS WITH MY BARE FRIGGIN HANDS AND PLAY HACKY-SACK WITH THEIR ADAM'S APPLES!!!

Sano: Wouldn't you get your Vans bloody?

T3h jack: true. I love these shoes. BUT STILL!!

Sano: Well listen, man. You have plenty of time to write AND do homework, you just need to quit slacking off! And you can pass English too, I mean there are people out there who RAVE about you in their reviews. You can't be THAT bad. And your Koishii TOLD you he's her best friend and that she loves you to death, now stop whining.

T3h jack: But she saidshe said he has nice hairshe likes itso threatened by hair

Sano: She also said she liked yours more.

T3h jack: She's just sayin' that.

Sano: Oh stfu. Anyway, it's just a flu, and it's not like you have to SPEAK your fanfics aloud, just type 'em! I mean, it's like Dolla Dolla bill, yo!

Saitou: It's all about the bling-bling.

Sano: Shut up, jerk!

Saitou: Make me, moron.

T3h jack: the bling-bling?!

Sano: *Throws Saitou over handy cliff* Nothing, babe. Just write.

T3h jack: I DUN WANNA!!! *cries like small child*

Sano: Look, just LOOK at these reviews though! I mean, Jessi reviews every chapter with an awesome paragraph, AND she's now voluntarily reading the shounen-ai bits! There's this new one here who says she likes lots of your fics, and that you have a new fan in her, and Mindmelda thinks you found your genre with this story! MINDMELDA!! Even Steal likes it! And she edits everything that passes through her hands to death! People even agree that 'goku' is an ass, and he's the only person who's really flamed you so far. I'm not even

T3h jack: Wellfeh. It's still a shameless self-insertion fantasy. And all I can seem to do is write friggin author's notes.

Sano: Well just make this your last one! I mean, all you favorite authors and authoresses barely ever indulge themselves in such literary debauchery! It's satanic (And Sano slowly slides out of character!). Maybe do one at the end for all the reviewers without e-mails, but otherwise just stop, k hon?

T3h jack: will I get some lovin?

Sano: I'll go put the satin sheets on, sexy.

T3h jack: Right! I'll be in once the new chappie is upworse that can happen is that I get flamed, and you catch my flu, and we get to spend a few days staying home*waggles eyebrows suggestively*

Sano: If that's the worst case scenario, I'd LOVE to try some of the better ones. Now write, I'll go buy some handcuffs.

There we go! I feel much better getting that off my back, been wanting to write it for a while I'll whine less in my notes, and limit them to one a chapter, from now on! Next chapter is coming up soon, I'll try to make it a winner. L8r my loyal readers and reviewers! I love you Koishii!