DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from 'Mutant X'. They're not
my property. They belong to Tribune Entertainment.
***
*********
Leaning on her palm, her blue eyes watched the movement of Brennan's fingers along his arm; if they moved any deeper he would surely rip out a chunk of his flesh.
"What's wrong?" she saw him open his mouth with the readiness to answer but Emma cut him off. "It's something else besides Shalimar?"
His dark browns turned to her with hidden uneasiness that observed her for a few moments before he responded. He could tell her, she might understand. Shalimar tried but it did not help him, they did not go away. Seeing her big blue eyes staring patiently at him, the Elemental gave a ready sigh and then said: "Last night I had this nightmare... but it suddenly switched to something else."
"Something more pleasant?" Emma's voice was low.
"Yeah. It hasn't happened to me before," he said.
Emma swallowed. Should she tell him? It would be for the best; a secret like that would resurface sooner than it could be hoped for. "I did it," she quickly told him.
Brennan's lips were closed and he stopped his fingers from moving. "Well... I'm not going to ask how, but..."
"I couldn't sleep last night and I passed by *my* room and saw that you were having that bad dream," she put her hands together, gripping them with her fingers as tightly as she could; her skin had gone pale where the pressure had been applied. She knew that he wanted to know the steps she took to give him a good night's sleep. "I wanted to actually see what was happening in there but it wasn't a pleasant experience for me when I tried," a failed attempt for a smile appeared.
"What happened?" he crossed his eyes.
"Just me being less careful than usual," the attempt was bigger now. She would not tell him of the closeness which she had to fainting. "The images were so scary and all that it freaked me out so intensely and I had to pull out quickly and try a different approach and luckily... it worked." She lifted her shoulders.
"Thanks." He nodded. "That was a rare night for me," Brennan stretched out his hands and pulled Emma closer to him, embracing her as his sign of gratitude. This little Psionic had managed to chase those tormenting and exasperating images for a night when he had needed the strength for the next day; the nightmares always managed to drain him from almost half of his strength which went to his psyche to try and fight them away and every time he would lose.
Emma smiled. She felt even her heart smile to the knowledge that she had done something good for her friend. Departing from him, she tapped his hand and leaned back. They had already exhausted the previous hour of a conversation revolving around Shalimar; they would have gone to see her right now if it hadn't been for Jesse's words that indirectly warned them to keep away for tonight. Emma sensed that somehow; she did not blame the Molecular. He had wanted to stay with the Feral that night, to be alone with her. Emma knew that he had missed Shalimar the most and that he would want to experience the quietness of the night with her where no one would disturb them, when no one would dare. Tomorrow they would return and he would see her with Brennan again. Emma wondered if he had been upset that Brennan hadn't been there. Perhaps she should have let the nightmare in his head continue so he wouldn't have over slept and missed the flight? No, that would have been wrong. At least the Feral had been well, Emma had hoped, and she helped Brennan. "Do they happen often?" she asked the tall Elemental.
His face turned for his eyes to gaze in front of him. "Almost every night since we left Sanctuary," he spoke with upcoming irritation but the thick disappointing melancholy was not going to allow that.
"Are they all the same?"
Brennan nodded in response.
"And you don't know what's causing them."
"No, I don't." He spread his arms on the couch. "But I wish I did, most times I feel like throwing chairs against the walls. It's so fucking irritating."
Emma folded her arms while watching every little expression his calm face was making. Her thought about those nightmares was simply the traumas he and the others had the unfortunate privilege of going through but she realized a second afterwards that there was more to it. This didn't seem natural or healthy. It was how savagely the dark images had sucked her inside with the perhaps, surprising, intention of suffocating her to death; dreams couldn't do that, no matter how evil and tormenting they appeared; they simply did not have that power.
It had been the safe thought of Jesse's watchfulness over Shalimar which did not let Emma's feelings drift too far away into the theme about their friend's safety. However, it had proven difficult to not have her thoughts there, so close by. It was then that Brennan and Emma exchanged sudden looks; they were both worried about their friend. Of course they would be. "We know that he won't let anything happen to her," Emma reassured them both - Brennan and herself.
"Yeah," he nodded once with agreement, "I know," and leaned forward exhaling extensively. His hands moved across his dark hair which seemed like nothing else but a dead piece of chalk, oddly enough; finally his forearms found themselves supporting his upper body on his knees as he stared in front of him once again. "I can't wait to see her," he spoke with honesty but with an intention which was more of guilt rather than the more expected approach, considering their relationship.
Emma was slightly surprised by this feeling which she sensed but she brushed it off as insignificant; they loved each other and the Psionic with all the sincerity inside her, could not picture him with anyone else. "I can't wait either," she had wanted to say but it would have sounded musty if she did so she chose momentarily silence instead.
They could hear the quiet moving of the clock's hands. Emma felt that it would become irritating so she picked up the remote from the table and started the CD player. The quiet instrumental melody had begun from the speakers. Putting the remote back, she leaned her head back and stared at the ceiling. Jesse would take care of Shalimar tonight; Emma sensed that Brennan trusted that as well. The redhead sighed; it seemed less lonely tonight; he made it less lonely; it hadn't been much different when Mary was here but somehow it felt better. "I'm sorry again." She heard him say. "About?"
"What I said that night."
There was a smirk. "And I've already told you that I've forgiven you." Something solid hit inside her, caused by this sentence; she hadn't forgotten her realization during the night when her blues were observing Brennan's sleeping body.
"Why does it sound so odd when I heard it now?" he took a doubt.
"How did he sense that?" she wondered. "Just your imagination, Bren, it's just your imagination," it was said with a pinch of, what Emma had hoped - unnoticed, humor. She would keep that inside her still. Perhaps with time it will disappear and she wouldn't have to reveal that she had unconsciously lied to him that night.
Brennan took a glimpse of Emma. Maybe he had imagined the barely noticeable falseness in her sentence. But how did they distance themselves from the topic about his constant nightmares? Tonight did not appear at all that perfect night for such a discussion although he had desperately wished to know the root of those irritating nightmares; the thoughts of their injured friend kept getting in their way despite the previously exhausted topic and despite the small ease provided by the knowledge that Jesse was watching out for her which, at least for a short while, reigned. Another glimpse; he was still thankful to Emma for getting rid of those evil images if only for one night. Brennan squeezed his lips together while something else began lurking in his head. If she helped him once maybe she could... no, he wouldn't ask her again, not in that way at least. "Em?" he called softly over to her.
"Mm?" she lifted her head and her blues fixed on his eyes.
"Would you..." he turned his face to stare at his hands for a few short seconds before letting out a much more heavier sigh. "Odd request but... wanna sleep with me tonight?"
Emma's eyes widened as much as they could to this demand.
"No, no, I don't mean it in that way! Don't worry, sex is the *last* thing on my mind right now! And with you especially."
"Gee, thanks," and threw her head back on the pillow once again.
"I just mean... to share a room with me?"
She lifted her head again. Emma didn't have to ask for a reason, she knew he would give it to her.
"I know it's weird, but I would like for you to be in the same room with me tonight. It won't accomplish anything but still it's ..."
"Ok." She nodded when seeing his almost ridiculous search of words for something she could already sense all too clearly.
A relieved smile, although small, appeared on his face. "Thanks."
"You're welcome, Bren." She stood up. "Gonna go prepare the nest," she smiled and walked towards the other rooms.
*********
He had woken up at 4 in the morning. His eyes opened and were allowed to travel around the limited picture of the ceiling with its gray and black shadows dancing around. Insomnia. a sigh was produced. He didn't need this interruption of his slumber, not now. As he swallowed a few drops of saliva through his dry throat, Brennan realized that he hadn't woken up because of a nightmare; there was no nightmare, no screams, ugly images but simple. stubbornness to return to his slumber. "This is a first." he thought and placed his right arm beneath his head to realize a moment later that the white and soft pillow which Emma had given him earlier felt much better so he placed his head on the pillow once again. Turning to his left, he saw a draped arm over a body he could not recognize fully due to the blocking caused by the small brown table. Lifting his head slightly, Brennan then saw the sleeping face and motionless body of the small redhead and the only sign of life was the barely noticeable movement of her chest as she soundlessly breathed in and out.
They had much deliberation of the sleeping arrangements and because of the strange awkwardness which arouse between them when one of the bedrooms was mentioned; a better alternative was seen in the living room. Brennan had immediately begun to put the sheets and pillows on the floor when they were quickly snatched away by Emma. "You're sleeping on the couch," she told him.
Brennan looked at her. "Uh, no. You're sleeping on the couch."
"But you're the guest here so you should be sleeping on the couch," she kept insisting. And that determination eventually ended up with Brennan's subduing to her 'wish'; it must have been the tiredness otherwise he would have not let her win. Although feeling uncomfortable of the switch which appeared so strange for the view of a male and female, Brennan soon fell asleep, not being able to think anymore. His only wish before he drifted off was the hope that tonight he would be spared of nightmares and that Jesse would take care of Shalimar.
Now, that slumber was cut off... at least for him. But he felt strange as to the absence of reason for his sudden insomnia when usually or always for this past, not to say lonely, year had been the bad dream. It had either been his psyche which had enough strength to fight off the horrible images or the nearness of this little Psionic. He chose to believe the first option. Although something deeper inside him wanted to scream out something else, shaking him briefly and roughly, that it had been more than that. Brennan smirked to this; if he could only determine the root of those nightmares it would be nothing but a 'piece of cake' to explain the rest... wouldn't it? He sat up, gripping the velvet surface ends of the couch on which he had been in deep slumber only a few minutes ago. His view of the Psionic was now improved; he could see her entire body, stretched out on the side as if on a display for him.
Brennan wondered how Shalimar was at this moment as he stood up; had she been asleep or perhaps having the same lack of that sleep as him? As soundlessly as he could possibly walk, the Elemental made his way slowly to his friend's sleeping figure. Did Jesse bring her to bed as he was supposed to or did he let her sleep on the couch? Brennan kneeled down; leaning forward as low as he could until his forearms were feeling the soft woolen carpet beneath him. Was Shalimar hurt badly and Jesse refused to say or were there only few minor cuts? His face was inches apart from Emma's; he observed her carefully and even took a strain of her hair which covered her closed eyes, putting it away. One year... could it possibly have been that long? At this moment Brennan was finding it impossible to believe. His right hand was now free as it hovered over her face; he was questioning himself whether to let his shame disappear or perhaps for only a few short seconds, throwing everything else, apart from Shalimar's wellbeing out of his mind and place the back of his hand on Emma's cheek, stroking her so tenderly that if she were dreaming, she would feel a butterfly crawling on her cheek.
Her skin was soft; Brennan had so few intimate moments to experience such a feeling but now, this felt the safest of them all as her skin felt like a pillow beneath his fingers. Was Jesse sleeping by her side or did he leave her the needed space? , another thought. Brennan felt even more guilty now for those nasty accusations an entire year before; she moved her face slightly which caused the Elemental to quickly pull his hand away; when she settled again, he took the dare again and returned his hand... he liked the feel she gave out.
Although her eyes were closed and her face with only a fraction of what could be interpreted as an announcement for perhaps a future smile, he could swear to himself that there was something kept inside her, something which he should be allowed to know; but he hoped that it was the strange imagination which the cursed insomnia was creating for him. Finally he removed his hand and placed it as a platform for his chin; he watched her for what his brain registered had been five minutes, when in fact it had been more than that. Brennan wanted to kiss her cheek, to say thank you for staying with him... might sound cowardly but his wild assumption of her company had been right... or perhaps he only wished it was. He gave a barely noticeable sigh and slowly backed away, standing up. He would thank her tomorrow... without the kiss.
As quietly as he approached Emma, even more quietly he retreated to the couch. To his relief, the insomnia was drifting away, making the path for his dreams to return. the pleasant ones, naturally.
*********
***
*********
Leaning on her palm, her blue eyes watched the movement of Brennan's fingers along his arm; if they moved any deeper he would surely rip out a chunk of his flesh.
"What's wrong?" she saw him open his mouth with the readiness to answer but Emma cut him off. "It's something else besides Shalimar?"
His dark browns turned to her with hidden uneasiness that observed her for a few moments before he responded. He could tell her, she might understand. Shalimar tried but it did not help him, they did not go away. Seeing her big blue eyes staring patiently at him, the Elemental gave a ready sigh and then said: "Last night I had this nightmare... but it suddenly switched to something else."
"Something more pleasant?" Emma's voice was low.
"Yeah. It hasn't happened to me before," he said.
Emma swallowed. Should she tell him? It would be for the best; a secret like that would resurface sooner than it could be hoped for. "I did it," she quickly told him.
Brennan's lips were closed and he stopped his fingers from moving. "Well... I'm not going to ask how, but..."
"I couldn't sleep last night and I passed by *my* room and saw that you were having that bad dream," she put her hands together, gripping them with her fingers as tightly as she could; her skin had gone pale where the pressure had been applied. She knew that he wanted to know the steps she took to give him a good night's sleep. "I wanted to actually see what was happening in there but it wasn't a pleasant experience for me when I tried," a failed attempt for a smile appeared.
"What happened?" he crossed his eyes.
"Just me being less careful than usual," the attempt was bigger now. She would not tell him of the closeness which she had to fainting. "The images were so scary and all that it freaked me out so intensely and I had to pull out quickly and try a different approach and luckily... it worked." She lifted her shoulders.
"Thanks." He nodded. "That was a rare night for me," Brennan stretched out his hands and pulled Emma closer to him, embracing her as his sign of gratitude. This little Psionic had managed to chase those tormenting and exasperating images for a night when he had needed the strength for the next day; the nightmares always managed to drain him from almost half of his strength which went to his psyche to try and fight them away and every time he would lose.
Emma smiled. She felt even her heart smile to the knowledge that she had done something good for her friend. Departing from him, she tapped his hand and leaned back. They had already exhausted the previous hour of a conversation revolving around Shalimar; they would have gone to see her right now if it hadn't been for Jesse's words that indirectly warned them to keep away for tonight. Emma sensed that somehow; she did not blame the Molecular. He had wanted to stay with the Feral that night, to be alone with her. Emma knew that he had missed Shalimar the most and that he would want to experience the quietness of the night with her where no one would disturb them, when no one would dare. Tomorrow they would return and he would see her with Brennan again. Emma wondered if he had been upset that Brennan hadn't been there. Perhaps she should have let the nightmare in his head continue so he wouldn't have over slept and missed the flight? No, that would have been wrong. At least the Feral had been well, Emma had hoped, and she helped Brennan. "Do they happen often?" she asked the tall Elemental.
His face turned for his eyes to gaze in front of him. "Almost every night since we left Sanctuary," he spoke with upcoming irritation but the thick disappointing melancholy was not going to allow that.
"Are they all the same?"
Brennan nodded in response.
"And you don't know what's causing them."
"No, I don't." He spread his arms on the couch. "But I wish I did, most times I feel like throwing chairs against the walls. It's so fucking irritating."
Emma folded her arms while watching every little expression his calm face was making. Her thought about those nightmares was simply the traumas he and the others had the unfortunate privilege of going through but she realized a second afterwards that there was more to it. This didn't seem natural or healthy. It was how savagely the dark images had sucked her inside with the perhaps, surprising, intention of suffocating her to death; dreams couldn't do that, no matter how evil and tormenting they appeared; they simply did not have that power.
It had been the safe thought of Jesse's watchfulness over Shalimar which did not let Emma's feelings drift too far away into the theme about their friend's safety. However, it had proven difficult to not have her thoughts there, so close by. It was then that Brennan and Emma exchanged sudden looks; they were both worried about their friend. Of course they would be. "We know that he won't let anything happen to her," Emma reassured them both - Brennan and herself.
"Yeah," he nodded once with agreement, "I know," and leaned forward exhaling extensively. His hands moved across his dark hair which seemed like nothing else but a dead piece of chalk, oddly enough; finally his forearms found themselves supporting his upper body on his knees as he stared in front of him once again. "I can't wait to see her," he spoke with honesty but with an intention which was more of guilt rather than the more expected approach, considering their relationship.
Emma was slightly surprised by this feeling which she sensed but she brushed it off as insignificant; they loved each other and the Psionic with all the sincerity inside her, could not picture him with anyone else. "I can't wait either," she had wanted to say but it would have sounded musty if she did so she chose momentarily silence instead.
They could hear the quiet moving of the clock's hands. Emma felt that it would become irritating so she picked up the remote from the table and started the CD player. The quiet instrumental melody had begun from the speakers. Putting the remote back, she leaned her head back and stared at the ceiling. Jesse would take care of Shalimar tonight; Emma sensed that Brennan trusted that as well. The redhead sighed; it seemed less lonely tonight; he made it less lonely; it hadn't been much different when Mary was here but somehow it felt better. "I'm sorry again." She heard him say. "About?"
"What I said that night."
There was a smirk. "And I've already told you that I've forgiven you." Something solid hit inside her, caused by this sentence; she hadn't forgotten her realization during the night when her blues were observing Brennan's sleeping body.
"Why does it sound so odd when I heard it now?" he took a doubt.
"How did he sense that?" she wondered. "Just your imagination, Bren, it's just your imagination," it was said with a pinch of, what Emma had hoped - unnoticed, humor. She would keep that inside her still. Perhaps with time it will disappear and she wouldn't have to reveal that she had unconsciously lied to him that night.
Brennan took a glimpse of Emma. Maybe he had imagined the barely noticeable falseness in her sentence. But how did they distance themselves from the topic about his constant nightmares? Tonight did not appear at all that perfect night for such a discussion although he had desperately wished to know the root of those irritating nightmares; the thoughts of their injured friend kept getting in their way despite the previously exhausted topic and despite the small ease provided by the knowledge that Jesse was watching out for her which, at least for a short while, reigned. Another glimpse; he was still thankful to Emma for getting rid of those evil images if only for one night. Brennan squeezed his lips together while something else began lurking in his head. If she helped him once maybe she could... no, he wouldn't ask her again, not in that way at least. "Em?" he called softly over to her.
"Mm?" she lifted her head and her blues fixed on his eyes.
"Would you..." he turned his face to stare at his hands for a few short seconds before letting out a much more heavier sigh. "Odd request but... wanna sleep with me tonight?"
Emma's eyes widened as much as they could to this demand.
"No, no, I don't mean it in that way! Don't worry, sex is the *last* thing on my mind right now! And with you especially."
"Gee, thanks," and threw her head back on the pillow once again.
"I just mean... to share a room with me?"
She lifted her head again. Emma didn't have to ask for a reason, she knew he would give it to her.
"I know it's weird, but I would like for you to be in the same room with me tonight. It won't accomplish anything but still it's ..."
"Ok." She nodded when seeing his almost ridiculous search of words for something she could already sense all too clearly.
A relieved smile, although small, appeared on his face. "Thanks."
"You're welcome, Bren." She stood up. "Gonna go prepare the nest," she smiled and walked towards the other rooms.
*********
He had woken up at 4 in the morning. His eyes opened and were allowed to travel around the limited picture of the ceiling with its gray and black shadows dancing around. Insomnia. a sigh was produced. He didn't need this interruption of his slumber, not now. As he swallowed a few drops of saliva through his dry throat, Brennan realized that he hadn't woken up because of a nightmare; there was no nightmare, no screams, ugly images but simple. stubbornness to return to his slumber. "This is a first." he thought and placed his right arm beneath his head to realize a moment later that the white and soft pillow which Emma had given him earlier felt much better so he placed his head on the pillow once again. Turning to his left, he saw a draped arm over a body he could not recognize fully due to the blocking caused by the small brown table. Lifting his head slightly, Brennan then saw the sleeping face and motionless body of the small redhead and the only sign of life was the barely noticeable movement of her chest as she soundlessly breathed in and out.
They had much deliberation of the sleeping arrangements and because of the strange awkwardness which arouse between them when one of the bedrooms was mentioned; a better alternative was seen in the living room. Brennan had immediately begun to put the sheets and pillows on the floor when they were quickly snatched away by Emma. "You're sleeping on the couch," she told him.
Brennan looked at her. "Uh, no. You're sleeping on the couch."
"But you're the guest here so you should be sleeping on the couch," she kept insisting. And that determination eventually ended up with Brennan's subduing to her 'wish'; it must have been the tiredness otherwise he would have not let her win. Although feeling uncomfortable of the switch which appeared so strange for the view of a male and female, Brennan soon fell asleep, not being able to think anymore. His only wish before he drifted off was the hope that tonight he would be spared of nightmares and that Jesse would take care of Shalimar.
Now, that slumber was cut off... at least for him. But he felt strange as to the absence of reason for his sudden insomnia when usually or always for this past, not to say lonely, year had been the bad dream. It had either been his psyche which had enough strength to fight off the horrible images or the nearness of this little Psionic. He chose to believe the first option. Although something deeper inside him wanted to scream out something else, shaking him briefly and roughly, that it had been more than that. Brennan smirked to this; if he could only determine the root of those nightmares it would be nothing but a 'piece of cake' to explain the rest... wouldn't it? He sat up, gripping the velvet surface ends of the couch on which he had been in deep slumber only a few minutes ago. His view of the Psionic was now improved; he could see her entire body, stretched out on the side as if on a display for him.
Brennan wondered how Shalimar was at this moment as he stood up; had she been asleep or perhaps having the same lack of that sleep as him? As soundlessly as he could possibly walk, the Elemental made his way slowly to his friend's sleeping figure. Did Jesse bring her to bed as he was supposed to or did he let her sleep on the couch? Brennan kneeled down; leaning forward as low as he could until his forearms were feeling the soft woolen carpet beneath him. Was Shalimar hurt badly and Jesse refused to say or were there only few minor cuts? His face was inches apart from Emma's; he observed her carefully and even took a strain of her hair which covered her closed eyes, putting it away. One year... could it possibly have been that long? At this moment Brennan was finding it impossible to believe. His right hand was now free as it hovered over her face; he was questioning himself whether to let his shame disappear or perhaps for only a few short seconds, throwing everything else, apart from Shalimar's wellbeing out of his mind and place the back of his hand on Emma's cheek, stroking her so tenderly that if she were dreaming, she would feel a butterfly crawling on her cheek.
Her skin was soft; Brennan had so few intimate moments to experience such a feeling but now, this felt the safest of them all as her skin felt like a pillow beneath his fingers. Was Jesse sleeping by her side or did he leave her the needed space? , another thought. Brennan felt even more guilty now for those nasty accusations an entire year before; she moved her face slightly which caused the Elemental to quickly pull his hand away; when she settled again, he took the dare again and returned his hand... he liked the feel she gave out.
Although her eyes were closed and her face with only a fraction of what could be interpreted as an announcement for perhaps a future smile, he could swear to himself that there was something kept inside her, something which he should be allowed to know; but he hoped that it was the strange imagination which the cursed insomnia was creating for him. Finally he removed his hand and placed it as a platform for his chin; he watched her for what his brain registered had been five minutes, when in fact it had been more than that. Brennan wanted to kiss her cheek, to say thank you for staying with him... might sound cowardly but his wild assumption of her company had been right... or perhaps he only wished it was. He gave a barely noticeable sigh and slowly backed away, standing up. He would thank her tomorrow... without the kiss.
As quietly as he approached Emma, even more quietly he retreated to the couch. To his relief, the insomnia was drifting away, making the path for his dreams to return. the pleasant ones, naturally.
*********