Disclaimer: I don't own Joan of Arcadia, the town, or its characters. I'm
just a college student.
Chapter 2: Help me Understand
"I still don't know," Joan said, starting to pull away from Adam as he moved closer to her,
"It's okay," he said disappointed, "I just wanted you to know how I feel, I don't want to hide my feelings about anything from you anymore, Joan. You're my best friend,"
"I am?" she asked happily, "I thought you and Grace were best friends, you've known her for a lot longer than you've known me,"
"No, Joan. Grace is one of my good friends, but I don't feel as comfortable around her as I do you," he said, and Joan smiled.
"That's really good to know," she said, "And you've been such a good friend to me too,"
"I see where this is going, Jane," he said walking away from her, "please, if you're going to discourage me, at least have the decency to not look me in the eye,"
"I don't understand," she said, her voice shaking.
"You told me you care for me, so if you try to make me change how I feel about you it would only be a lie, and really . . . lies aren't something I want to hear from my best friend,"
Joan walked over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. He only turned his head enough so he could see her out of the corner of his eye, "I do care for you, that's not the problem. If I didn't care for you I wouldn't be here trying to get you to look at me," she stopped, "now please, Adam," he slowly turned toward her.
"Lay it out plainly for me, Joan. If you don't want to be with me, or you don't think it would work then just say it. I'd rather have you be honest than lie to me and break my heart later. Just do one thing for me," he requested softly.
"Anything," she said, her breath becoming shallow. He moved his lips close to hers again, just as they had been earlier.
"Let me kiss you one more time," he looked her straight in the eye, "then you can tell me what you really want, Joan," all she could do was nod and close her eyes before his lips were on hers once again. The kiss felt sweet, a little different, surer, and more sincere than at the science fair. Maybe it was because they were alone this time, or maybe because they had time to think about the last one, but whatever the reason, it left Joan breathless and there was no way she could deny that she wanted to be with him. He pulled away before she was ready, and her hands clenched around his neck more tightly, as if she were begging him to kiss her once again. He wanted to, more than anything he wanted to, but he didn't. He looked her deeply in her eyes and waited for her response. He wanted to believe, but didn't assume that her physical response to his kiss was enough to signal what she would say. He hoped she'd link herself to him; say that anything and everything was worth risking so they could be together, so they could be happy.
"When you do things like that, Adam" she said, feeling her cheeks flush. She again tried to pinpoint when her feelings became romantic for him, but so much was going on and she knew she had to find the right words to say to him so she dismissed all other thoughts for the time being, "Let me start over," she said laughing, feeling foolish, "You were right, I would be lying if I said I didn't want to be with you," he closed his eyes,
"But?" he asked, feeling sad.
"There aren't any buts. Few things in life are certain, and how is anyone to know what's right or wrong for them unless they try?" she said smiling. He hugged her tightly as she finished what she was saying,
"I want to take things slowly," he whispered in her ear. He could feel her smiling against his shoulder, "rushing into things never works," They stood there in his shed, among his pieces of art, just holding one another. Joan wondered why God hadn't warned her about Adam. It's not that she was angry with God, she just wondered why he always had her doing tasks and when she needed to ask him something or needed to know what would happen in her own life, he never appeared. He did; she just wouldn't find that out til' later.
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"Our project definitely turned out better than I expected," Luke said to Grace as they sat in her bedroom. He knew that Grace had only invited him over to work on homework, but he wanted to believe there was still a chance for them.
"Yeah, I, uh, thought it wasn't going to work at all at first," Grace said in her usual tone.
"I knew we'd make a great team, Grace," he said cautiously, "We could be good friends,"
"Like I said before, don't push it," she reminded him and he nodded obediently, but then shook his head after realizing that he didn't agree,
"I don't get it," he said loudly, trying to get her attention. She stood up and closed her chemistry book.
"What don't you get?" she asked, seeming disinterested.
"You kissed me, Grace. Now, excuse the fact that I keep bringing it up, but it IS kind of a big deal, you know," he laughed in exasperation. His volume had increased without, much unknown to him, and the Rabbi Polk entered his daughter's room,
"Is there a problem, Grace?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. Luke's heart sped up. How could things be so awkward when he and Grace were only friends?
"No, Dad, I'm fine," she said and her father smiled and left the room.
"I was proving a point, you know that," she said, turning back to Luke.
"What if I stopped bugging you about it, then would explain to me what's going on?"
"You're right, you DON'T get it, do you? Just because we did one project together doesn't mean that we're friends,"
"You're going in circles, Grace. WE'RE going in circles. Why'd you even invite me here if you don't want to be my friend?"
"Leave then," she said, pointing at her door.
"Very funny, it's not like I drive," he stared at her, making a good point.
"I'm sure you can find someone to pick you up," still pointing at the door. Her tone was still cold and unaffected as he picked up his bag and stormed down the stairs.
Inside, Grace shut her door and fell onto her bed. She always did this, put up a front when she was around people, only to breakdown when she was alone. The truth was, she DID want to tell Luke about herself, about why she does the things she does, acts the way she does, and she gladly WOULD'VE told him . . . had she known the answers herself. So she carried on with her life unchanged, maybe someday she will understand and be able to share her emotions, the feelings know one thinks she has, with someone who she can trust. Whether she knew it or not, Luke was just about the closest thing to what she needed.
"Sir, Rabbi . . . um . . .?" Luke began, he needed to use the phone.
The man laughed, "Just because I'm a Rabbi doesn't mean you have to be nervous son," Luke smiled, "Now, what do you need?"
"I was wondering if I could use your phone . . .?"
"Certainly, are you going home?" he asked kindly.
"Yes," he said briefly as Grace's father handed him the phone,
"I'd offer to take you, but I've got some work to do around here,"
"Thanks, I'll be okay," he said, dialing Joan's cell number. It rang several times, he had no idea what he was interrupting.
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Lips pressed up against one another, Joan pretended she didn't hear the familiar ring of her cell phone. Kissing Adam more, she tried placing her hands over his ears so that he couldn't hear it either, but to no avail,
"Mmm," he said pulling away from her for a second, their lips parting made a soft sound, "Joan, is that your phone?"
"No," she said moving to kiss him again, "no I don't hear anything," She wrapped her arms around him, but the phone rang incessantly.
"Just answer it," he said smiling and touching her nose with his index finger, "I'm sure it's important. They keep calling," she sighed and reached in her bag,
"The caller ID says it's Grace, I wonder what THIS is about," she said curiously before she picked up the phone. She'd completely forgotten that Andy was 'studying' at the Polk house. Adam placed his hands on his face, so much was going on that he had barely had time to realize that Joan was finally his. He smiled, touching his lips, and then looking at his art. She inspired him.
"Hello?" Joan said.
"Oh, God what TOOK you so long?," her brother said, "I need a big favor," she rolled her eyes, knowing it was him. Rabbi Polk peeked his head around the corner and looked at him. "Sorry," he whispered. He wasn't used to being careful with his words like he should've been around a Rabbi.
"Well, I'm not GOD," she teased, "believe me, I'm nothing like Him," she mumbled.
"What?" he asked, "Anyways," he continued, "Can you come pick me up from Grace's?"
"Finished 'STUDYING?'" she joked.
"I don't want to talk about it," he breathed. Joan could sense the seriousness in his voice and stopped giving him a hard time.
"Okay, but give me a few minutes, I'm not at home," she explained.
"Thank you SO much, Joan. I owe you one," he said happily. Joan looked at Adam and smiled, then said to her brother,
"You have NO idea," and then hung up. She walked over to Adam again and took his hand, "I've got to pick Luke up from Grace's. I'm pretty sure something big happened, he seems pretty upset. I'm sorry," she said, eyes growing sad.
"It's cool," he smiled and kissed her on the cheek, "I'll see you in school tomorrow?" he asked hopefully.
"Yeah, definitely," she smiled and lifted her bag, walking out the door. Where was God now? He hadn't shown up all day?
Chapter 2: Help me Understand
"I still don't know," Joan said, starting to pull away from Adam as he moved closer to her,
"It's okay," he said disappointed, "I just wanted you to know how I feel, I don't want to hide my feelings about anything from you anymore, Joan. You're my best friend,"
"I am?" she asked happily, "I thought you and Grace were best friends, you've known her for a lot longer than you've known me,"
"No, Joan. Grace is one of my good friends, but I don't feel as comfortable around her as I do you," he said, and Joan smiled.
"That's really good to know," she said, "And you've been such a good friend to me too,"
"I see where this is going, Jane," he said walking away from her, "please, if you're going to discourage me, at least have the decency to not look me in the eye,"
"I don't understand," she said, her voice shaking.
"You told me you care for me, so if you try to make me change how I feel about you it would only be a lie, and really . . . lies aren't something I want to hear from my best friend,"
Joan walked over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. He only turned his head enough so he could see her out of the corner of his eye, "I do care for you, that's not the problem. If I didn't care for you I wouldn't be here trying to get you to look at me," she stopped, "now please, Adam," he slowly turned toward her.
"Lay it out plainly for me, Joan. If you don't want to be with me, or you don't think it would work then just say it. I'd rather have you be honest than lie to me and break my heart later. Just do one thing for me," he requested softly.
"Anything," she said, her breath becoming shallow. He moved his lips close to hers again, just as they had been earlier.
"Let me kiss you one more time," he looked her straight in the eye, "then you can tell me what you really want, Joan," all she could do was nod and close her eyes before his lips were on hers once again. The kiss felt sweet, a little different, surer, and more sincere than at the science fair. Maybe it was because they were alone this time, or maybe because they had time to think about the last one, but whatever the reason, it left Joan breathless and there was no way she could deny that she wanted to be with him. He pulled away before she was ready, and her hands clenched around his neck more tightly, as if she were begging him to kiss her once again. He wanted to, more than anything he wanted to, but he didn't. He looked her deeply in her eyes and waited for her response. He wanted to believe, but didn't assume that her physical response to his kiss was enough to signal what she would say. He hoped she'd link herself to him; say that anything and everything was worth risking so they could be together, so they could be happy.
"When you do things like that, Adam" she said, feeling her cheeks flush. She again tried to pinpoint when her feelings became romantic for him, but so much was going on and she knew she had to find the right words to say to him so she dismissed all other thoughts for the time being, "Let me start over," she said laughing, feeling foolish, "You were right, I would be lying if I said I didn't want to be with you," he closed his eyes,
"But?" he asked, feeling sad.
"There aren't any buts. Few things in life are certain, and how is anyone to know what's right or wrong for them unless they try?" she said smiling. He hugged her tightly as she finished what she was saying,
"I want to take things slowly," he whispered in her ear. He could feel her smiling against his shoulder, "rushing into things never works," They stood there in his shed, among his pieces of art, just holding one another. Joan wondered why God hadn't warned her about Adam. It's not that she was angry with God, she just wondered why he always had her doing tasks and when she needed to ask him something or needed to know what would happen in her own life, he never appeared. He did; she just wouldn't find that out til' later.
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"Our project definitely turned out better than I expected," Luke said to Grace as they sat in her bedroom. He knew that Grace had only invited him over to work on homework, but he wanted to believe there was still a chance for them.
"Yeah, I, uh, thought it wasn't going to work at all at first," Grace said in her usual tone.
"I knew we'd make a great team, Grace," he said cautiously, "We could be good friends,"
"Like I said before, don't push it," she reminded him and he nodded obediently, but then shook his head after realizing that he didn't agree,
"I don't get it," he said loudly, trying to get her attention. She stood up and closed her chemistry book.
"What don't you get?" she asked, seeming disinterested.
"You kissed me, Grace. Now, excuse the fact that I keep bringing it up, but it IS kind of a big deal, you know," he laughed in exasperation. His volume had increased without, much unknown to him, and the Rabbi Polk entered his daughter's room,
"Is there a problem, Grace?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. Luke's heart sped up. How could things be so awkward when he and Grace were only friends?
"No, Dad, I'm fine," she said and her father smiled and left the room.
"I was proving a point, you know that," she said, turning back to Luke.
"What if I stopped bugging you about it, then would explain to me what's going on?"
"You're right, you DON'T get it, do you? Just because we did one project together doesn't mean that we're friends,"
"You're going in circles, Grace. WE'RE going in circles. Why'd you even invite me here if you don't want to be my friend?"
"Leave then," she said, pointing at her door.
"Very funny, it's not like I drive," he stared at her, making a good point.
"I'm sure you can find someone to pick you up," still pointing at the door. Her tone was still cold and unaffected as he picked up his bag and stormed down the stairs.
Inside, Grace shut her door and fell onto her bed. She always did this, put up a front when she was around people, only to breakdown when she was alone. The truth was, she DID want to tell Luke about herself, about why she does the things she does, acts the way she does, and she gladly WOULD'VE told him . . . had she known the answers herself. So she carried on with her life unchanged, maybe someday she will understand and be able to share her emotions, the feelings know one thinks she has, with someone who she can trust. Whether she knew it or not, Luke was just about the closest thing to what she needed.
"Sir, Rabbi . . . um . . .?" Luke began, he needed to use the phone.
The man laughed, "Just because I'm a Rabbi doesn't mean you have to be nervous son," Luke smiled, "Now, what do you need?"
"I was wondering if I could use your phone . . .?"
"Certainly, are you going home?" he asked kindly.
"Yes," he said briefly as Grace's father handed him the phone,
"I'd offer to take you, but I've got some work to do around here,"
"Thanks, I'll be okay," he said, dialing Joan's cell number. It rang several times, he had no idea what he was interrupting.
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Lips pressed up against one another, Joan pretended she didn't hear the familiar ring of her cell phone. Kissing Adam more, she tried placing her hands over his ears so that he couldn't hear it either, but to no avail,
"Mmm," he said pulling away from her for a second, their lips parting made a soft sound, "Joan, is that your phone?"
"No," she said moving to kiss him again, "no I don't hear anything," She wrapped her arms around him, but the phone rang incessantly.
"Just answer it," he said smiling and touching her nose with his index finger, "I'm sure it's important. They keep calling," she sighed and reached in her bag,
"The caller ID says it's Grace, I wonder what THIS is about," she said curiously before she picked up the phone. She'd completely forgotten that Andy was 'studying' at the Polk house. Adam placed his hands on his face, so much was going on that he had barely had time to realize that Joan was finally his. He smiled, touching his lips, and then looking at his art. She inspired him.
"Hello?" Joan said.
"Oh, God what TOOK you so long?," her brother said, "I need a big favor," she rolled her eyes, knowing it was him. Rabbi Polk peeked his head around the corner and looked at him. "Sorry," he whispered. He wasn't used to being careful with his words like he should've been around a Rabbi.
"Well, I'm not GOD," she teased, "believe me, I'm nothing like Him," she mumbled.
"What?" he asked, "Anyways," he continued, "Can you come pick me up from Grace's?"
"Finished 'STUDYING?'" she joked.
"I don't want to talk about it," he breathed. Joan could sense the seriousness in his voice and stopped giving him a hard time.
"Okay, but give me a few minutes, I'm not at home," she explained.
"Thank you SO much, Joan. I owe you one," he said happily. Joan looked at Adam and smiled, then said to her brother,
"You have NO idea," and then hung up. She walked over to Adam again and took his hand, "I've got to pick Luke up from Grace's. I'm pretty sure something big happened, he seems pretty upset. I'm sorry," she said, eyes growing sad.
"It's cool," he smiled and kissed her on the cheek, "I'll see you in school tomorrow?" he asked hopefully.
"Yeah, definitely," she smiled and lifted her bag, walking out the door. Where was God now? He hadn't shown up all day?