AN: It's been SOOOOOOOOOO long!!!!!!!!! *drops to knees and begins to beg proffusely* I'm SOOOOOOOOOO sorry! Please forgive me! Life got in the way!!!!!!!

*calms down and breathes* OMG! 33 reviews! I've never even dared to dream of having 33 reviews! I feel SOOOOOOOO loved! Ok, anyways, I love you all! *throws out Spock plushies to everyone* And special thanks to Anna and her brilliant jokes, and round-about inspiration! On with the story!

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Anna, who had been focused on the Vulcan goodness that is Spock, did not notice the others in the room until she heard Chekov's unmistakable Russian tones.

"Pavel!" she squealed in a voice high enough to qualify as a faulty dog whistle (in fact Porthos whined piteously and covered his eyes with his paws, cowering in Lillian's lap as the word came out of her mouth.) "HEY!" Anna continued indignantly, seeing Bunny, "what do you think you're doing with him? If anyone's going to tackle Chekov it should be me! When I'm not too busy tackling Spock, of course," she added, smiling at the first officer. Turning back to Bunny: "I love him! You can't love him cause I love him! It's...it's..." She paused, trying to find a word that expressed what it was. Ah, she had it! "It's illogical!" She then lauched herself once again this time at Chekov, where she had a gloriously heated argument with Bunny as to who should tackle him.

"Me!" Anna declared. "If anyone is tackling Pavel it's me!"

"No way! I am BATGIRL! I demand the right of tackling him! You have Spock, Chekov's mine!"

"No, mine!" She pried Bunny's fingers off and pushed her away, latching herself onto the unfortunate navigator. Hugging him in a death grip she beamed up at him. "Hi, Pavel!"

Chekov gulped, looking very scared, a "dear G-D someone help me" look in his eyes as he couldn't help looking at the girl who had securely fastened herself to his person. "Um, yes, hello…I, uh…yes, spaseeba, thank you…I am…very flattered…"
Spock bent his head toward Gwen: "Does she have a habit of tackling people?"

"Oh no," Gwen said airily, as if Anna's behavior was the most natural thing in the world. "She's just being Anna."

"Pretty much full time," Anna said, gazing at Chekov adoringly.

"I think I liked her better when she was being herself with me," Kirk muttered. "Upstaged by a navigational officer…this ruins my reputation and does nothing for my pride…"

"Aw, poor Jim," Anna said sympathetically. "You know I love you." Chekov and Kirk both brightened at this, Chekov because she might let go of him and Kirk because she might leave Chekov for him. Their hopes were dashed for the moment when Anna added, "And when I'm done giving Pavel the recognition and attention he rightly deserves, poor neglected and unappreciated navigational officer that he is, I'll be more than happy to tackle you. Again. But not now. OK, sweetie?"

"Don't encourage him," Bones said, then smiled innocently as Kirk glared at him, causing McCoy to add quickly, "Then again, I'm a doctor, not a matchmaker, so what do I know?"

Between gazing alternately at Spock and Chekov, Anna spared a thought to notice Q's arrival and deciding whether it warranted her immediate attention. She decided it didn't; she still hadn't forgotten the time Q had sent Picard and company lightyears into the future where they met the Borg. And he was all power, petulance, and playfulness, which, alliteration aside, was an impressive yet deadly combination. He reminded her of the Agents from the Matrix. One good deed was supposed to make up for all that? But she didn't want to think about philosophy or ethics or…any of it, actually. She wanted to think about Spock., And Chekov. And how she was going to get them and keep them away from everyone else. Besides, Q was a definite nutcase, and she didn't even like the idea that there might be someone crazier than she was. She did have a reputation to maintain.

Turning her back on Q, she started another long arguement with Bunny over whom Chekov loved best (and the subject of their argument looked like he'd just walked into a starship full of Klingons with an empty phaser and no back-up power source).

She started a rendition of Robert Burns' March to Bannockburn in her best Scottish accent. "Scots, wha hae wi' Wallace bled, Scots, wham Bruce has aften led, welcome to your gory bed, or to Victory!"

Scotty looked at her with respect dancing in his eyes, and his face crinkled as he smiled, applauding loudly. Spock was quite impressed but merely inclined his head in acknowledgement. Bones and Kirk were lost for words, which was a first on Kirk's part.

"Where'd ye learn that, lassie?"

"British Literature. Want to hear the rest of it?"

"If I might interject at this juncture in time, Captain, it would be more logical to focus on the immediate problem, the anomaly, as well as the corollary, which is why so many members have congregated here so quickly."

"You're slipping, Spock," Bones said after a minute. "I almost understood that. I think. Jim, I'm a doctor, not Noah Webster. You speak Spock. What'd he say?"

"We should forget Anna's flawless poetry skills" – he paused to flash her an award-winning smile – "and try to figure out what the original glitch was and why we're all here."

"Oh."

"Before ve do that, Keptin," Chekov said, "can ve take time for a drink?"

"Aye," Scotty said, "I've got a sair amount o' credits wagered against ye."

"You're a GAMBLER?" Anna shrieked indignantly, waking Porthos up with a pitiful whine and reducing him to a cringing ball of fur. Lillian quickly scooped him up and started petting him. "I am offended! I must smite thee down with moral indignation!" She started towards him menacingly.

"Uh, whatever happened to, 'I disagree'?" Bones said quickly before any of Scotty's major organs got squished.

"That's over too quickly and has absolutely no aerobic benefit." She glared at the engineer. "How can you be a gambler?!"

"I'm jist a wee one," Scotty said. "Mah pride's at stake. Ne'er argue wi' a Scot about liquor."

"A drinking contest," Gwen howled. "They're having a drinking contest!"

"Aye! We've a bet wagered on which is better, Scotch or Vodka!"

Spock arched an elegant eyebrow. "That is not logical."

"Pride never is, sir!" Scotty said cheerfully. "An' wi' the Captain's permission, I'll drink his navigator under the table any stardate o' the year. Preferably this one, though, I could do with a bit o' fun after all th' hard work I've done on th' console. Scotch or nothing!"

Chekov glared at Scotty; his eyes were like phasers set to kill. "I'm from Russia! We inwented drinking! With proper drinks like Wodka, not some stupid watered down poor excuse like Scotch!"

"This resulting flow of illogic is most entertaining," Spock observed dryly.

Scotty and Chekov whirled on him: "You stay out of this!" They turned back to face each other, and Scotty said, "Fine! Get yer wodka and we'll see how proper it is!"

"You'll fall out of orbit like a faulty starship, Scotsman!"

"Hey!" Gwen shouted, suddenly aware of the serious consequences of this contest. "I do not want to see an inebriated Scotty or an inebriated Chekov together in a relatively small room––"

"Actually," Spock interrupted, "the dimensions of this room do not technically constitute…"

But Gwen cut him off: "A relatively small room together especially when he's an engineer and he's a navigator and there are breakable objects!"

"Wow!" Bunny said after a minute or two. "Beware the wrath of Gwendolyn."

"Which is just like the Wrath of Kahn," Talia added, "only more…wrathful."

At this Gwen jumped and began to do her best evil cackle.

People cringed. Spock blinked. Porthos whined a bit, and Lillian immediately stopped cringing and comforted him. (Whether he was whining because of the sound or that Lillian had stopped lavishing him with attention for half a minute we'll never know)

Q stared in disbelief, "Wait…hello? What about me? Aren't I supposed to be the most insane one here?"

Gwen stopped cackling, she stared at him before bursting out in non-evil laughing at him, "NoOoO! I'm the most insane one here, followed closely by Anna, and then next is Bunny. Compared to us your normal!"

"Bah!" Anna snorted in contempt of all things reality-based. "Saness is vastly overrated. And reality is only for people who lack imagination, and we've all got plenty of that. You must remember, Gwen, that normality is relative. In fact, there is no normal. And besides, I'm not insane! I'm…I'm sanity challenged, thank you oh so very much! And besides, I read somewhere that insanity is a natural reaction to an insane world and so anyone's who's not insane is not normal! Hah! I've run rings round you logically!"

"Your definition of logic is decidedly illogical," Spock said seriously.

"But even you've got to admit that there's a defenite streak of logic in my illogic because it wouldn't be illogical if there was no logic on which to base it, therefore making my illogic logical and my logic illogical but logically my illogic is by definition logical."

"OK, see, that was scary on a level I never knew existed," Tavia said. "That was insane even for me."

"You don't agree?" Anna asked.

"I will as soon as I figure out what in the galaxy you just said."

"I know this illogical logic. It was inwented in Russia," Chekov said.

"Like everything else in the galaxy," Bones muttered.

"But…but…don't you even want to know what I'm doing here?" Q asked in disbelief.

"You're here because you caused whatever it was that brought all the Star Trek hotties here and now your going to gloat?" Tavia asked.

"…"

Gwen sat back down and immediately latched back on to Spock's arm, muttering something about the letter Q and something about ownership of Spock. Spock blinked again.

"OH MY GOSH!!!!!" Everyone turned to the window, the source of the exclamation. There stood a window washing girl, who looked ready to well…wash some windows. " It's Spock!!!!!!!"

Anna and Gwen immediately stepped in front of the window, blocking the girl. Gwen wore her Death Glare 'O Doom™.

"And who do you think you are?" They asked lowly.

"I'm Alyssa, the window washer! And that's MY Spock!"

"HE'S MINE!" Gwen and Anna said in unison before turning and glaring at each other, "NO, HE'S MINE!" The said in unison again. And hence began another argument, this time including a new combatent, Alyssa…the window washer.

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AN: And that another chapter wrapped up. PS. Alyssa, sorry, you said window washer and I couldn't resist. =p

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