Goodbye
By
One-Winged Angel
Disclaimer: I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion
Thank Yous:
Nigoki-Thanks for the praise
Kman- I think 31/2 out of 5 is a good start
D14852001-Thanks for the advice on the sound effects
Animefan2017-Your advice I really took into account, It helped my brain churn out new ideas.
Keyblade-00-Your review helps me to write even better chapters for this story.
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The light was shining through the window of a bedroom. The occupant not noticing the other bed is vacant. The sleeping figure was shifting slowly among the sheets, trying to adjust her eyes to the blinding light of the morning's sunshine.
"Shinji?" The figure lightly asked.
There was no response; only the silence of the air could be heard.
"Shinji?" The figure asked with more concern in her voice and slowly began to rise. Asuka rose from her bed and lightly rubbed her eyes taking into account her surroundings.
She noticed Shinji's bed was messy and untidy. 'Shinji's never messy' the redhead thought. "Shinji?" Asuka shouted, but still only silence could be heard. She climbed up from her bed and proceeded into the hallway that connected their bedroom to the living room.
"Shinji?" Asuka asked with more worry in her tone. The kitchen was empty and the living room was bare. It's like she was the only one there. Asuka started to become worried where Shinji was.
She returned to their room and saw that the drawers Shinji owned were empty. 'Where'd all….' She then saw a letter on top of the drawer.
She fingered the top of the letter and slowly started to open it.
I silently read the white piece of paper that may lead me to where Shinji may be:
Dear Asuka,
If you're reading this, then that means that I've left you. Don't come looking for me, and I doubt you will. I just didn't want to be a burden to you any longer. It tears my heart to see you in pain.
I knew that from the first day you married me that, you didn't love me. I just thought that maybe with time you would learn to. I guess I was wrong. You just never saw me that way, I guess. So I'm leaving this house, this place, and Tokyo-3. I wrote this letter as a sort of goodbye and as my confession.
What confession you might ask, well… I loved you from the first day I saw you. You were the light that guided me when I was in the darkness; you were the flower in my desert of despair. I have and always loved you, the strength and conviction of my love for you will never waver through the years, and though I won't be there know that I will always love you now and forever.
Now that I've poured my heart out, I just want to say goodbye, and I hope that we'll meet each other again.
You know some say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and whoever said that was one really smart person. I just looked in your eyes and I knew the answer. I wish you would love me back, but I guess it's not meant to be. I hope your not laughing your head of right now, but what I'm saying is true.
Goodbye, Asuka, goodbye forever.
Always and forever yours,
Shinji Ikari
Midway through the letter, tears were falling down Asuka's cheeks when she got halfway through the letter. It was full of emotion and passion that even if Shinji wasn't there, she could feel the words as if it were her own.
She placed her hand over here eyes, and felt the hot tears running down her cheeks. "I'm crying… for that idiot…" But it was very hard for her to say those last few words, she felt like her heart was being torn apart and stepped upon.
Ever since she married Shinji, she didn't show any amount of love to him. She kept it all inside thinking Shinji was only feeling sorry for her. In, reality she was afraid of showing her love for the brown-eyed boy. She felt that maybe he would leave her just like everyone else.
But, Asuka knew that deep within her heart, she loved Shinji. It reflected on the way she less frequently insulted him, and toned down the intensity of her insults. How, when he was not looking, looked at him with the love that she hid within herself. How she would smile when he did even the smallest act of kindness for her.
Then, she remembered all those smiles, all the compliments, and all the love that Shinji showed her, but never reciprocated. She was now regretting the fact that she took it all for granted. She wanted to return all those gestures of kindness he showed her.
She then realized, in all her married life, she never once kissed Shinji, never once hugged him, or have any physical touch except for the occasional holding hands.
At all these thoughts Asuka's heart felt like it was being shattered by the numerous revelations that were erupting from her mind. No her heart was already shattered. She was regretting every bad thing that she has ever done to Shinji.
All the insults that she ever hurled against him. All the punches that she would throw at him, it all served as a bulldozer for Asuka's already shattered heart.
She put the tear-stained letter back on the dresser and went to the living room and sat down on the couch. Her hands were holding her head and she looked like she was just out of a bar fight.
She thought of all the things she could've said to him, all the things she could've done for him. But, now it was too late as he has already left.
'If only I wasn't so stubborn, if only I could've shown my feelings instead of hiding them, Shinji would still be here.'
Then she thought about it, Shinji couldn't leave the city at least not yet, he still has to stay goodbye to all his friends. She could visit each of them and maybe meet him while he's saying goodbye to them. She knew he couldn't do it in the middle of the night, so he must found some place to say, it would be in the morning or in the afternoon before he would leave.
Yes, she could do that! And pray to God that she would be reunited with Shinji. She thought that maybe if he wasn't there, her last resort was the train station, and hope that his train hasn't left yet.
She stood up, with this revelation, and proceeded to run into the bedroom, and upon reaching her closet, got her coat out.
She raced out the door of their apartment, not caring that she was still in her pajamas, with a renewed faith that she would be reunited with the one she loved.
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Thanks for the reviews keep them coming.
I'll be ready with the next chapter maybe by next week.
Domo Arigato