Live to Love
Author: Moggie
Pairing: Do I really need to tell you?
Category: Angst
Rating: R
Summary: Read and find out.
Spoilers: Not Sure Yet
Disclaimer: I do not under any circumstances own CSI: Crime Scene Investigation.
Notes: Song = David Sylvian -Dead Bees on a Cake: Darkest Dreaming. The song from 'Lady Heather's Box', where Grissom is sitting in his car at the end of the episode.
Section 1
The room is dark apart from its single light source, the moon. It's glow floats around the room with its soft white and blue light. The large bed in the centre of the room is occupied and the sheets are barely covering those that weren't sleeping.
He raises his head and locks onto her dark eyes. She grips his biceps as the passion grew and let out a gasp of pleasure. His body gave into everything and showed her all that he felt. Their eyes never wavered as his lips grazed her nose in a light kiss. Bodies met in perfect synchronisation, both amazed and wondered how it was that they were making love like it had always meant to be.
Sweat glistens against the moonlight shining through the window. His back muscles bunched tightly and relaxed with each motion. Dropping his head as his eyes clamped shut; his fingers pushed through her silky brown hair. His lips found hers as she slipped her hands over his shoulders to rest on his neck. Drawing air into their lungs between kisses, their movements became more urgent. Breaking a deep kiss with a gasp from both, they gave into the passion that had been locked within them for years.
Eyes met, still intimately held together. Tears gradually form in her eyes as he gazes down at her. His thumb brushes a tear away as he let a small sad sigh pass his lips. Closing his eyes, he gently kisses her, lingering until both knew it was time to stop. Her eyes remained closed as they curled up together and slept for the first time in each other's arms.
*^*^*^*
"Stay tonight
We'll watch the full moon rising
Hold on tight
The sky is breaking
I don't ever want to be alone
With all my darkest dreaming
Hold me close
The sky is breaking
I don't ever want to be alone
With all my darkest dreaming
Hold me close
The sky is breaking"
*^*^*^*
She had her back to him as she listened to his soft breathing and light movements of deep sleep. Her tears had returned and as she rolled over to see him, she couldn't stop them from dropping onto her pillow.
He lay on his back with his right arm resting over his stomach and his left pushed under his head. He looks so peaceful and so young lying beside her. She wanted to remember this moment forever, burn it into her mind so she could look back and remember that she was once happy and that he had loved her, showed her his love for her and gave every ounce of feeling into it.
Now, she was conflicted as to whether she should stay or go. It was still dark outside and the moonlight was fading. If she didn't decide now, she would still be in this bed lying beside him when he woke.
Thinking about that time of wakefulness, it scared her. He may have shown her, but what would it be like when he woke up to find her here. She couldn't stop the pain that filled her heart and her tears gradually blurred her vision some more.
She hesitated as she reached out to hover her hand over his heart, wanting so much to touch him, but afraid he'd wake and she'd see the confusion and then the regret.
Pulling her hand back to wipe her eyes, she tried to stop the crying and control her beating heart. She slipped quietly from the bed and collected her clothes that had fallen to the floor hours ago in the throes of passion.
Looking back at him as he moaned and turned in his sleep, she watched as his left hand reached out to the space she had been. Her eyes closed as he pulled her pillow to his chest and sighed.
He'd understand he had to. It was for the best and she wouldn't have to wait anymore. It had been over three years that she had waited and when he finally took notice, she had made her decision to leave. She knew it was the reason he came, to stop her, to talk her out of it, but in the heat of the argument, she'd kissed him.
Now she knew what it feels like to be close to him, to touch him and to kiss him. If that's all he was willing to give, she'd allow him to give it, but she knew deep down that he'd never change, he'd never pursue it even if she stays.
He wanted this from the beginning, for her to stay away, to not get involved, but she couldn't. She couldn't just leave in the beginning. It was too hard to leave him even though she never meant anything to him. She knew. She wasn't completely blind to his true feelings. He kept his hearing secret from her because he's private, but more because he didn't want to tell her.
Enduring his gruffness at work and his seemingly unlawful treatment of her was moot now. She understood and though it took so long, she figured it out. He really didn't care anything for her other than a co-worker and it was strained to believe he'd kept her on. He must have really hated her for the things she did. If she thought his 'deserving a life' comment was going to pull them further apart, she would have been content on being alone.
Over the year and a half, their friendship that had been unbreakable was shattered into tiny pieces. Friendship that had lasted long before she came to Vegas was no more and for a long time she had thought about leaving. Perhaps their friendship could be salvaged if they never worked together or saw each other for a while.
Funny how a friendship turns into a tattered relationship and the only way that seemed to fix the problem was distance and that didn't always work.
Casting one last look across his sleeping body, she couldn't help the lasting tear that slipped from her guard and rolled down her cheek. She felt she was betraying him and her punishment was already set before her. She was destined to be alone forever.
*^*^*^*
He rolled over and stretched his arm out against the mattress; much like many hours ago, feeling for it's other occupant. Finding nothing but the cold crisp sheet, his eyes slowly opened to see nothing there. Pushing himself up, he looked around the room with a heavy heart.
Her suitcase was gone from by the door and her jacket was missing from the chair by the desk. A strong feeling of loss and pain hit his heart so hard, he didn't notice the lone tear that escaped him and landed in slow motion on his hand. She was gone from his life forever. She'd left him alone to deal with the aftermath of what had happened and worse, she'd left him in her bed.
TBC
Author: Moggie
Pairing: Do I really need to tell you?
Category: Angst
Rating: R
Summary: Read and find out.
Spoilers: Not Sure Yet
Disclaimer: I do not under any circumstances own CSI: Crime Scene Investigation.
Notes: Song = David Sylvian -Dead Bees on a Cake: Darkest Dreaming. The song from 'Lady Heather's Box', where Grissom is sitting in his car at the end of the episode.
Section 1
The room is dark apart from its single light source, the moon. It's glow floats around the room with its soft white and blue light. The large bed in the centre of the room is occupied and the sheets are barely covering those that weren't sleeping.
He raises his head and locks onto her dark eyes. She grips his biceps as the passion grew and let out a gasp of pleasure. His body gave into everything and showed her all that he felt. Their eyes never wavered as his lips grazed her nose in a light kiss. Bodies met in perfect synchronisation, both amazed and wondered how it was that they were making love like it had always meant to be.
Sweat glistens against the moonlight shining through the window. His back muscles bunched tightly and relaxed with each motion. Dropping his head as his eyes clamped shut; his fingers pushed through her silky brown hair. His lips found hers as she slipped her hands over his shoulders to rest on his neck. Drawing air into their lungs between kisses, their movements became more urgent. Breaking a deep kiss with a gasp from both, they gave into the passion that had been locked within them for years.
Eyes met, still intimately held together. Tears gradually form in her eyes as he gazes down at her. His thumb brushes a tear away as he let a small sad sigh pass his lips. Closing his eyes, he gently kisses her, lingering until both knew it was time to stop. Her eyes remained closed as they curled up together and slept for the first time in each other's arms.
*^*^*^*
"Stay tonight
We'll watch the full moon rising
Hold on tight
The sky is breaking
I don't ever want to be alone
With all my darkest dreaming
Hold me close
The sky is breaking
I don't ever want to be alone
With all my darkest dreaming
Hold me close
The sky is breaking"
*^*^*^*
She had her back to him as she listened to his soft breathing and light movements of deep sleep. Her tears had returned and as she rolled over to see him, she couldn't stop them from dropping onto her pillow.
He lay on his back with his right arm resting over his stomach and his left pushed under his head. He looks so peaceful and so young lying beside her. She wanted to remember this moment forever, burn it into her mind so she could look back and remember that she was once happy and that he had loved her, showed her his love for her and gave every ounce of feeling into it.
Now, she was conflicted as to whether she should stay or go. It was still dark outside and the moonlight was fading. If she didn't decide now, she would still be in this bed lying beside him when he woke.
Thinking about that time of wakefulness, it scared her. He may have shown her, but what would it be like when he woke up to find her here. She couldn't stop the pain that filled her heart and her tears gradually blurred her vision some more.
She hesitated as she reached out to hover her hand over his heart, wanting so much to touch him, but afraid he'd wake and she'd see the confusion and then the regret.
Pulling her hand back to wipe her eyes, she tried to stop the crying and control her beating heart. She slipped quietly from the bed and collected her clothes that had fallen to the floor hours ago in the throes of passion.
Looking back at him as he moaned and turned in his sleep, she watched as his left hand reached out to the space she had been. Her eyes closed as he pulled her pillow to his chest and sighed.
He'd understand he had to. It was for the best and she wouldn't have to wait anymore. It had been over three years that she had waited and when he finally took notice, she had made her decision to leave. She knew it was the reason he came, to stop her, to talk her out of it, but in the heat of the argument, she'd kissed him.
Now she knew what it feels like to be close to him, to touch him and to kiss him. If that's all he was willing to give, she'd allow him to give it, but she knew deep down that he'd never change, he'd never pursue it even if she stays.
He wanted this from the beginning, for her to stay away, to not get involved, but she couldn't. She couldn't just leave in the beginning. It was too hard to leave him even though she never meant anything to him. She knew. She wasn't completely blind to his true feelings. He kept his hearing secret from her because he's private, but more because he didn't want to tell her.
Enduring his gruffness at work and his seemingly unlawful treatment of her was moot now. She understood and though it took so long, she figured it out. He really didn't care anything for her other than a co-worker and it was strained to believe he'd kept her on. He must have really hated her for the things she did. If she thought his 'deserving a life' comment was going to pull them further apart, she would have been content on being alone.
Over the year and a half, their friendship that had been unbreakable was shattered into tiny pieces. Friendship that had lasted long before she came to Vegas was no more and for a long time she had thought about leaving. Perhaps their friendship could be salvaged if they never worked together or saw each other for a while.
Funny how a friendship turns into a tattered relationship and the only way that seemed to fix the problem was distance and that didn't always work.
Casting one last look across his sleeping body, she couldn't help the lasting tear that slipped from her guard and rolled down her cheek. She felt she was betraying him and her punishment was already set before her. She was destined to be alone forever.
*^*^*^*
He rolled over and stretched his arm out against the mattress; much like many hours ago, feeling for it's other occupant. Finding nothing but the cold crisp sheet, his eyes slowly opened to see nothing there. Pushing himself up, he looked around the room with a heavy heart.
Her suitcase was gone from by the door and her jacket was missing from the chair by the desk. A strong feeling of loss and pain hit his heart so hard, he didn't notice the lone tear that escaped him and landed in slow motion on his hand. She was gone from his life forever. She'd left him alone to deal with the aftermath of what had happened and worse, she'd left him in her bed.
TBC