Wizard´s Chess
By neopyro
A\n: I have a very low opinion of most religions, and a very low knowlege of others. I have no intent to offend you, I´m just in the mood for a funny fic. Enjoy.
A\n 2: Some of the names I use, I didn´t invent. See if you can spot them. No lawsuits please! I´m broke!
Everyone gets bored. Even the gods. Now everyone knows that when you´re bored you end up doing stupid things. That, of course explains this incident.
There are some wizards that have been declared "All Powerful." Most of which are obvious. Salazar Slytherin, Merlin, Harry Potter, Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, Rowena Ravenclaw and Albus Percival Wufric Brian Dumbledore. Not all of those were really specifically "Good" or "Evil", so naturally, they can´t all be used in this Game.
That´s right. Game. Meaning a contest, tournement, competition or whatever you wish to call it. In this case, a large battle of good and evil, with wizards. After all, the gods are low on ideas and even gods need to have fun. And this, is where our story begins.
"This is so dull. There´s nothing on TV, no wars and sports have gotten a bit corny as of late. Anybody up for scrabble?" Thor complained
"Scrabble´s only good for four players, and Hermes always cheats." Hades pointed out
"That´s true. Hermes really needs to lay off the wine. Besides, we´re almost out." Bacchus pointed out
"Hermes didn´t drink all the wine, you did!" Venus corrected "Besides, we can just have that Jesus fellow make more. That´s a nice trick, that water to wine stuff."
"That it is." Thor agreed "But we´re still bored. Let´s gather everyone. I have an idea, and a good feeling that everyone´ll love it."
*****later*****
"So, let me get this straight." Odin said "You want us to bring 16 good wizards and 16 evil wizards and have them duke it out on a battle arena that has a chessboard on the floor?"
"That is correct." Thor confirmed
"Well..." Odin started
"I THINK IT´S BLOODY BRILLIANT!" Nike yelled "I volunteer to design the arena, if Hades will release the souls. Then each Lucifer, Pluto, Proserpine, Hades, Osiris, Poena, Hel and Death will each pick two evil wizards and Odin, Zeus, Jesus, Allah, Juno, Jupiter, Idun and Frigg will each pick two good wizards."
There was suddenly no doubt in any of the god´s minds. This was going to be excellent.
*****later still*****
Hades cleared his throat, and all eyes turned towards him.
"The side of evil has chosen it´s fighters. They will be as follows:" Hades said in an official voice "Tom Riddle, Salazar Slytherin, Ararorrin Slytherin, Albert Grindelwald, Amedaus Malfoy, Pol Detson, Jonathan Hiner, Podo Hardbottle, Jason Nesmeth, Milliard Peacecraft, Tyler Heatherson, Andreas Gaymes, Walton Kaak, Chivalry Farseer and Chade Fallstar." Hades announced
The crowd applauded the choices. There were a couple suprises amongst that list, but nothing that stood out as shocking. Zeus stepped out and everyone quieted again.
"The side of light has chosen their warriors. These are our selections: Harry Potter, Albus Dumbledore, Virginia Weasly, Sirius Black, Harkat Mulds, Urza Planeswalker, Holly Short, Jude Gwenn, Godric Gryffindor, Merlin, Onkimser Archon, Magnus Needlewind, Thorin Oakenshield, and the triplets."
Everyone gasped. Even among the gods thought that the triplets were merely a joke. They hadn´t really existed had they? maybe so, maybe not. They were of course about to find out.
By neopyro
A\n: I have a very low opinion of most religions, and a very low knowlege of others. I have no intent to offend you, I´m just in the mood for a funny fic. Enjoy.
A\n 2: Some of the names I use, I didn´t invent. See if you can spot them. No lawsuits please! I´m broke!
Everyone gets bored. Even the gods. Now everyone knows that when you´re bored you end up doing stupid things. That, of course explains this incident.
There are some wizards that have been declared "All Powerful." Most of which are obvious. Salazar Slytherin, Merlin, Harry Potter, Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, Rowena Ravenclaw and Albus Percival Wufric Brian Dumbledore. Not all of those were really specifically "Good" or "Evil", so naturally, they can´t all be used in this Game.
That´s right. Game. Meaning a contest, tournement, competition or whatever you wish to call it. In this case, a large battle of good and evil, with wizards. After all, the gods are low on ideas and even gods need to have fun. And this, is where our story begins.
"This is so dull. There´s nothing on TV, no wars and sports have gotten a bit corny as of late. Anybody up for scrabble?" Thor complained
"Scrabble´s only good for four players, and Hermes always cheats." Hades pointed out
"That´s true. Hermes really needs to lay off the wine. Besides, we´re almost out." Bacchus pointed out
"Hermes didn´t drink all the wine, you did!" Venus corrected "Besides, we can just have that Jesus fellow make more. That´s a nice trick, that water to wine stuff."
"That it is." Thor agreed "But we´re still bored. Let´s gather everyone. I have an idea, and a good feeling that everyone´ll love it."
*****later*****
"So, let me get this straight." Odin said "You want us to bring 16 good wizards and 16 evil wizards and have them duke it out on a battle arena that has a chessboard on the floor?"
"That is correct." Thor confirmed
"Well..." Odin started
"I THINK IT´S BLOODY BRILLIANT!" Nike yelled "I volunteer to design the arena, if Hades will release the souls. Then each Lucifer, Pluto, Proserpine, Hades, Osiris, Poena, Hel and Death will each pick two evil wizards and Odin, Zeus, Jesus, Allah, Juno, Jupiter, Idun and Frigg will each pick two good wizards."
There was suddenly no doubt in any of the god´s minds. This was going to be excellent.
*****later still*****
Hades cleared his throat, and all eyes turned towards him.
"The side of evil has chosen it´s fighters. They will be as follows:" Hades said in an official voice "Tom Riddle, Salazar Slytherin, Ararorrin Slytherin, Albert Grindelwald, Amedaus Malfoy, Pol Detson, Jonathan Hiner, Podo Hardbottle, Jason Nesmeth, Milliard Peacecraft, Tyler Heatherson, Andreas Gaymes, Walton Kaak, Chivalry Farseer and Chade Fallstar." Hades announced
The crowd applauded the choices. There were a couple suprises amongst that list, but nothing that stood out as shocking. Zeus stepped out and everyone quieted again.
"The side of light has chosen their warriors. These are our selections: Harry Potter, Albus Dumbledore, Virginia Weasly, Sirius Black, Harkat Mulds, Urza Planeswalker, Holly Short, Jude Gwenn, Godric Gryffindor, Merlin, Onkimser Archon, Magnus Needlewind, Thorin Oakenshield, and the triplets."
Everyone gasped. Even among the gods thought that the triplets were merely a joke. They hadn´t really existed had they? maybe so, maybe not. They were of course about to find out.