Authors: slytherinsRsexyer7283 and beater#4
Rating: PG-13
Summary: 5 years after arriving at Hogwarts, Draco joins a tap dancing troupe- but what about his baby?
Disclaimer: Jay-Kay owns it ALL. Except we own the cup of fire.
Chapter Thirteen: Big Brother Uncut
Now this looks like a job for me
So everybody just follow me
Cos we need a little controversy
Cos it feels so empty without me
Now this looks like a job for me
So everybody just follow me
Cos we need a little controversy
Cos it feels so empty without me
- Eminem, "Without Me"
~
Stephen Cornfoot sent an owl home with a message.... a ferociously dangerous message.
"Scared Potterrrrr?" Draco, a Slytherin stud in Harry's year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and
Wizardry, drawled.
"You wish Draco!!! Youuuu wisshhh!!! You really wish Draco!!!!!" Harry's voice had broken and he had
now become a man.
"Yer. Great man Dumbledore, great man." Rubeus, another man whose voice had just broken, peeped
out with his beetle black eyes from behind his gristly bush of a beard.
"Can we panic now?" Ron's voice was breaking and he sounded like a cross between a 7 year old girl and Hagrid.
"Oh Ron you are such a joker!" Hermione spanked Ron playfully on the backside.
Unknowingly to everyone, Chow Chang - who we haven't seen for a while - slipped into the background
dragging a familiar looking corpse with her....
Suddenly an old man turned on the lights and startled everyone to death, literally!
Thanks for reading Pump the Breaks. We hoped you enjoyed this Re-Run. Will Keyring leave the house? Or will Grindleward rise again with his faithful sidekick Grindylow? Well you'll never know because the story has ended. Hahahahahahahahahaha.
Meanwhile on the Quidditch field, Drakkie, also known as 'Dragon', was brushing his hair.
"Who are you?" A newly grown Daniel Radcliffe exclaimed wheatily.
"Dooby the house elf." Cried Dobby the House Elves.
It started to rain and the class all trudged back inside and made their way to the Wylde Rattz concert.
Rumor has it that Ewan McGregor plays a mean guitar. Neville brought some lipstick for the
occasion.
"Oh no we have Advanced Dark Magic Studies with Slytherin!"
"Oh no we've missed the sorting!" Harry had missed the sorting for 2 years - he even missed his own
sorting due to drug abuse. The Sorting Hat sorted the first years into their houses (in case you didn't
know).
Dean Thomas took down his Westlife poster, sadly reminiscing of all the good times they had had together.
"Today class we are going to learn the Avada Kedavra spell! Who would like to help me demonstrate?
Eye..." Ernie the Night Bus Guy drove.
Everyone looked at Ron.
"Aha! Another Weasley! Eye..." Ernie the Night Bus Guy indicated and turned to Ron. Ron didn't have
much to live for, and didn't have much money either, so he walked up to the front of the class, while his
fellow classmates either cheered him on or cheered because he was going to die. Ron didn't know which,
but he knew Harry would be cheering him on. They were best friends, you see. Ron had the necklace to
prove it. Although Ron hadn't seen Harry's half of the necklace since he gave it to him. Ron figured he'd
just ask him about it later.
Ernie the Night Bus Guy dodged some letterboxes and gave him hot chocolate and screamed... "AVADA
KEDAVRA!!!! Eye...." Ron's limp body crumpled in a heap on the ground and burst into flames.
"Okay, everyone get into pairs and practice the spell on each other!" Ernie the Night Bus Guy reversed
and parked himself at the front desk. Soon, there was an entire class full of smoking uniforms and ash
until Neville (or so Ernie the Night Bus Guy thought) was the only one left.
"Sir, I can't get the spell to work!" Alex Band sung. Ernie the Night Bus Guy frowned, as Alex Band was
the best student in the class and this spell should be easy for him.
"Let me try." Ernie the Night Bus Guy went into first and waved his gear stick and blinked his lights "ABRA
KEBABRA!!!!! Eye..."
But that didn't work on 'Neville' either.
"ABRA KEDABRA!!!! Eye.... AVADA KEDAVRA!!!! ARABIAN!!! Eye..."
And still 'Neville' didn't die. Ernie the Night Bus Guy thought his wAnd was broken so he motioned to Alex
Band to sing... I mean, do the spell on him.
"AAAAAAAAAADRIANNNEE!!!" Alex Band kedavred. And Ernie the Night Bus Guy was but a crumpled pile of
clothes and a small fire on the ground. Paul Walker pulled out his marshmallows and they all sat around
what used to be Ernie the Night Bus Guy, toasting marshmallows on the ends of their wands.
And Ernie the Night Bus Guy never found out that 'Neville' was really Harry using a fake name.
The bell rung signaling the end of class and everyron got up and left. Except for the real Neville....
A.N: Who really is the Green Goblin? Will Snape ever steal the Sorcerers Rock? Who REALLY put
Harry's name in the cup of fire??? Find out in the next episode of PUMP THE BREAKS. Review! Review!
Review!