00Snape
Sev The Expectant
"Draco!" was all Hermione could say as she launched herself into his arms and began to sob hysterically. The blonde boy could do nothing but rub comforting circles into her back and make strange hissing noises of comfort. Well, he was a Slytherin.
"Bee! Bee!" came a hysterical sound from behind Hermione, where Harry Potter was hopping round in circles, making gleeful exclamations at the sight of a rather large bumbelbee which had flown in at the window. "Bzzzz!" He began to flap his arms rather quickly and zoom around the room, chasing and mimicking the bee.
"Harry!" came the explosion from Hermione, as she watched in horror. The shout made him turn, and he spotted Draco.
"Oooooh. Pwetty." He said, and crawled towards them on hands and knees, staring at Draco as one would stare at a rather juicy slab of Belgium chocolate, or The Rolling Stones when they turn up on your doorstep and serenade you.
"Hermione!?" said Draco, in a rather paniced tone of voice, "Is that Potter?"
"Powwer!" shouted Harry triumphantly, and latched himself onto Draco's leg. "Me Hawwy."
"Harry, darling, leave Draco alone. Come to aunty Mimi." The look on harry's face was one of such horror and pain that Hermione carefully squatted down next to him and attempted to prise him off Draco's leg. Harry burst into tears, fell backwards and raised his arms beseechingly to Draco, screaming.
"What on earth!?" shouted Draco over the din, and pulled Hermione to her feet.
"The shock, it sent him over the edge." Explained the girl, massaging the small of her back, and tugging out her wand from the back pocket where it sat. "Clofesio elle mione!" she whispered, and the gown smoothly changed from the illustrious gift of her lover to a pair of hip hugging jeans and a blue T-shirt.
"Right, lets go." Draco said, ignoring Harry, who was still sobbing.
"Look, we can't just leave them here." Pointed out the girl rationaly, and leviated Ron into the air, Draco sighed. "You take Harry. Hold his hand or he'll escape."
"What!" screamed Draco, giving Harry a dirty look. Seeing the utter dejection on his friend's face, he reluctantly transfigured a small red cushion into a large red lollipop and held it out to the large baby in front of him. Harry beamed, and crawled forward. "Ergh."
"Dwaco!"
With Harry trotting happily at his heels, in baby reigns and Ronald Weasley floating in front of him held by Hermione, Draco and Co. wearily set off for the hospital wing, praying earnestly that he would meet no-one.
-*ö*-
"What on earth!" was Madame Promfreys exclamation when they arrived. "Hermione! What happened!"
Hermione wearily laid Ron down on a bed and Mme. Promfrey began fussing over him. Harry meanwhile, was attempting to climb Draco to reach his hair, while Draco was fending him off. Madame Promfrey, although a bit bossy, was also pragmatic, and summoned a large baby den, popping Harry firmly into it and latching the door. Harry began to cry fitfully until she pressed a Draco Doll she had just transfigured in with him, whereupon he began chewing the animated Draco's ear.
The real Draco, watching in disgust, turned to Hermione and whispered,
"I am never having children." Hermione smirked and laughed, a strange I'm-trying-not-to-bawl-my-eyes-out laugh. Draco comfortingly hugged her, while Mme Promfrey attempted to enervate Ron. Finally, after the seventh attempt, she attatched a mass of beeping wires around him and began herding Draco and Hermione into her office, where Draco sat down in a leather chair and picked up the copy of 'Quidditch Daily'.
Mme Promfrey meanwhile was talking to Hermione, who had clearly released some charms, as her flat stomach bulged out just slightly.
"Good girl. I wish you didn't have to use those."
"I have to Madame." Hermione answered tiridly, leaning against the recliner summoned up for her. A few rather complicated spells later and Mme Promfrey was smiling happily. Hermione was not, she looked exhausted.
"Did you sleep last night, girl?" the medi-witch asked suddenly, rustling in her desk drawers. Hermione blushed and mumbled something.
"I think I'm glad I didn't hear that." Draco, who was looking revolted, added darkly,
"I wish I hadn't." Hermione went almost purple.
"Uhm, anything to do?" she asked hurridly, and Mme Promfrey held up a large bottle of something dark and heady.
"Drink some every night." She passed her the bottle, and jumped when someone barked from outside.
"Poppy!" came the summons, and Hermione almost dived across the room towards the window. Luckily, Draco caught her and handed her the wand he had been holding for her.
"The spells." He hissed, and she nodded, wide eyed.
"Totalus secretis abholus." She muttered, and the teeny bump flattened as if it had been squashed by her books. Then she whispered at Draco, "Why are we here?"
"Potter and weasley!" he excalimed, as the door was almost blasted off it's hinges by someone who was very angry.
"Poppy!" snarled Severus Snape, holding his arm awkwardly. "Hermione?" he sounded terribly starled, and Hermione moved ever so discreetly behind Draco suddenly.
"Master Malfoy, you are wante by Dumbledore. Miss Granger, what on earth are you doing here?" he sounded angry now, and Draco made to stay, but was almost knocked out of the way as professor Snape seized Hermione by the upper arma and marched her out of the room.
Half running to keep up with her lover, Hermione was pulled through the castle until she was yanked through a small stone passage way and fell.
"Severus!" she exclaimed, as he promptley picked her up and carried on marching until they reached another stone corridor and a stone snake.
"My only love springeth from my only hate." He quoted and marched into his chambers, flinging floo powder onto the fireplace there and shouting out 'Snape Castle!'- hurtling both himself and his girlfriend through the floo network to end up in their room.
-*ö*-
"Sevrus, please put me down." Hermione requested weakly and he sat down, her still posessivley in his arms, on the silken bed. Tiredly she let her head nestle against his shoulder.
"What's wrong, my love?" asked Severus, suddenly concerned by her wane face. She smiled. Hurrdily he shouted imperiously downstairs,
"Water!" and within seconds a small house-elf had appeared, holding an ornate caraf and two long stemmed glasses. Severus nodded, took the drinks and pured her some. "Drink that." He commanded, and she oblidged. Suddenly she turned slightly green and belted for the door leading through to the bathroom.
"Hermione!?" exclaimed Snape and raced after her, only to find her retching into the toilet. Carefully he drew her hair back from her face and stroked her cheeks as she clambered wearily to her feet again.
"Here, drink this." He handed her a glass of water and she rinsed and then drank. "What's wrong?"
Hermione leant against him as she staggered back to the bedroom and lay down again. Waving her wand breifly, she changed her T shirt and cleared up the aura of I've-just-puked surrounding her. Snape, noticing her teary eyes gathered her into his arms and set about kissing her better.
"Do you want anything?" he asked at last, setting her down gently and covering her bare feet with a black silk sheet and propping her up against his headboard with pillows. She began to sob slightly.
"A banana milkshake would be nice." She said sniffily, and he sighed and conjured one up for her, lying down on the bed next to her and wrapping his arms around her stomach. With a startled cry he lept backwards, holding the arm he had been holding when Promfrey had shooed them out from her office.
"What's wrong?" she asked, and he moved towards her again. He looked puzzled.
"Have you got charms up?" he asked, and she nodded meekly. He scowled softly and rolled his sleeve up, revealing a perfectly bare left forearm.
"The Totalus secretis abholus spell." She gasped. "That's how you keep it hidden."
"Mm, yes." He answered briefly, rolling his sleeve down again. "You have one up as well." Hermione's eyes widened and she realised that the spells had come into contact with each other, causing a shock to be experianced by the weaker secret.
They sat in silence for a moment, holding each other carefully, and then Severus spoke again.
"What's your's?" he asked quietly, and she gulped. "Did you get a piercing or something?"
"Nooo." She said slowly, almost unwillingly.
"What then?" he sounded quite jokey, "Put on some weight? I won't mind."
"Oh you will." She whispered bitterly. "Because it will be more than just a bit."
"Oh Hermione, I love you, you silly witch. I shan't mind." She couldn't understand why he was so happy.
"Then we both release them together." She said, after he had pleaded with her for some twenty minutes.
"You don't want to see my mark." He shuddered, and she gave him a challenging glare.
"You won't want to see this." She said. And he nodded his head as they drew their wands out.
And removed them.
Severus had been right, she hadn't wanted to see that, that tattoo. She almost retched, but held her food in as her stomch bulged out slightly more. Severus still had that slightly blanc, hopeful, carefully sculpted look on his face and Hermione sighed.
"I don't understand Hermione." He said at last, slowly, and she began to cry slightly.
"I'm rather surprised you haven't." she answered, evading his out reaching arms. "It all adds upto one thing, Sev, the sickness, the weight gainage, the horrid emotion swings, the dependancy on Draco, even the regular visits to the hospital wing. Even the cravings for those putrid bananas!"
There was a silence, and then Sev spoke.
"I'm not sure I und-" he began, and she turned to him, eyes blazing.
"Fine! I'm pregant; preggers; with child; indisposed; knocked up even! Whatever you think diguses it most you can say!" and then she broke down into torrents of tears, cuddeled up on the bed, one hand desperately clutching the black silk bedsheets.
Severus sat, in total silence until Hermione turned over and looked at him, some five minutes later. She had been expecting to be pushed off the bed and out of the room, or to be cuddled and told everything would be all right, but not this silence. It mystified her, until she noticed his pupils were not visiable and his eyes were rolled up into his head. Lord Severus Snape, feared potions master of Hogwarts, reformed deatheater, lover;: ex-lover Hermione, she reminded herself bitterly, of Hermione Granger and ruler of three estates and seven full Gringotts accounts, had fainted.
Sighing, his pregnant girlfriend heaved herself dramatically from his side, and stalked over to the fireplace.
"Headboy's rooms!" she cried and flung herself into the green flames.
Draco was sitting on his bed, apparantly disgusted by a drooling Harry Potter who was lying fawningly over his knees. He looked up startled when she arrived, dry eyed and unscathed. He had had the sneaky suspicion his godfather would whack her one in puzzlement, and was rather surprised to see her with the charm off and no tears spilling down her face.
"I told him!" she announced, and Harry cocked his head appealingly. "I told him I was knocked up!"
Draco, just about to say something was distracted by a horrendous banshee like shriek as Harry Potter dropped into his lap unconcious.
"Like that?" groaned the Slytherin, pushing the wonderboy off his bed.
"I gave him a choice of words and phrases." She said calmly.
"What did he do? Where is he?" asked Draco frantically, worried his potions teacher would burst in at any moment threatening to avada kedara him for being in the same room as his loved one.
"He fainted. I left him on the bed." She said, a ghost of a smile forming on her lips. "You can go and get him while I take Harry to the hospital wing."
Draco threw back his head and laughed. And then, because it is very awkward to laugh when ones head is tilted at an ungodly angle, pushed his head forward and laughed properly.
"No, seriously, what did he do?"
Hermione looked startled, and told him quite seriously.
"I left him unconcious on the bed. Just leave him there." And then glided serenely out of the room, a leviating Harry behind her, in the direction of the hospital wing and madame Promfrey.
Leaving Draco Malfoy to hurridly look up self-preservation spells to use against his furious god father, who was lying unconcious in his manor.
Author's Note: That went better than I expected. It worked! I tried out all these tragic scenes, ('Severus, I'm pregnant!' 'Look, you asshole, I indisposed! Help!') and none worked, so I just went for humor! I read this thing today where it said 'There must be a direction to the storyline if there is to be a good tale' and I realised I have no direction. Please reassure me that this is worth doing! Sobs I'm not posting again until I get another five reviews. Please.
Thanks to:-
Walking Enigma – Thankyou so much for putting me one your favourites list, I'm really happy! jumps around And for your most recent review. Grrrrr. Back away from the Severus. Mine! Mine!
Mickat – Er, you do know there was another chapter after that, right? Thankyou for your review, and the second chapter seems to be confusing a great many people. All will become clear…
MadAboutHarry – I don't think I'll end up anywhere. But never mind. That's half the fun of fanfiction.