The Adventures of Chevron Guy: Love Machine
Major Carter: 'Airman have you seen General Hammond?'
Me: No Mam, but I think he may be in the infirmary (she is SO checking me out, lucky I wore sexy new blue shirt today and my tight black trousers that make my butt look irresistible. the ladies love it)
Major Carter: Ah right, well could you help me with something while you're here?
Me: Anything for you sweet cheeks (CRAP, I can't believe I just said that, I meant to think it. Quick think of some brilliant cover up, or maybe she didn't notice.)
Major Carter: Excuse me? (I guessed she noticed)
Me: You're excused (way to go get yourself fired)
Major Carter: What did you say before?
Me: I didn't say anything (that's it, make it look like she's the one with the problem - hearing things, crazy lady)
Major Carter: Ok. Well could you just bring up the data on this gate address?
Me: (Sure thing Sweet Cheeks - that time I manage just to think it (I'm not suicidal)). Yes Mam. (God MC is HOT when she's mad. and when she smiles. and when she breathes. ok pull yourself together - this may be the only chance you get to impress her with your vast intelligence) I engage the chevrons (and then I smile like a goon--- way to go dumbarse)
Major Carter: That's. nice, must be a errr challenging job
Me: Oh it is (wait is she mocking me? She better not be mocking me! I don't like to be mocked! Nothing makes a Chevron guy madder than someone mocking his chevron encoding skills... no no this is MC she's nice she would never mock anyone, she must be genuinely interested --my chances are looking up)
Colonel O'Neill: Hey Carter, Airman (Oh bugger not him. stupid, arrogant, thinks he's so great just because he's Colonel, please like its that hard)
Me: Sir (I manage to give a respectful nod)
Colonel O'Neill: So Carter what are you up to? (Is he hitting on her? He's hitting on my chick. I don't believe it. Not that MC and me are involved but the attraction is blatant. Well her attraction to me is - I on the other hand am far more subtle)
Major Carter: We were just looking up some information on P3X259 (We were? Oh yeah I'd better actually do that)
Colonel O'Neill: Sounds like fun
Me: Yeah its great (he's just jealous because she's spending time with me, everyone knows she won't give him the time of day. loser)
Colonel O'Neill: Carter you wana grab some breakfast?
Major Carter: Sure Sir (she turns to me) can you finish doing this and I'll meet up with you later
Me: Yes Mam (Oh she's saying meet up to talk chevrons but we both know what she really means - Sorry Colonel but MC is mine)
Major Carter: Ok, see you later
Me: Sure thing toots (though I waited for her to get out of hearing distance before adding 'toots'. ah life is good, MC wants me and as long as I don't have to eat any of her carrot cake I'll settle for being her boyfriend)
The End
Authors Note: Ok can you image what 'MC' would do to anyone who called her 'toots'? BAMM a punch in the nose. Realised while writing this that Colonel O'Neill initialled is CO just like 'commanding officer' - how exciting. Anyway I know this wasn't a proper romance for CG and I will give him one, I just wanted to show how smooth he is with the ladies. Please make my day and Review, toodles
Major Carter: 'Airman have you seen General Hammond?'
Me: No Mam, but I think he may be in the infirmary (she is SO checking me out, lucky I wore sexy new blue shirt today and my tight black trousers that make my butt look irresistible. the ladies love it)
Major Carter: Ah right, well could you help me with something while you're here?
Me: Anything for you sweet cheeks (CRAP, I can't believe I just said that, I meant to think it. Quick think of some brilliant cover up, or maybe she didn't notice.)
Major Carter: Excuse me? (I guessed she noticed)
Me: You're excused (way to go get yourself fired)
Major Carter: What did you say before?
Me: I didn't say anything (that's it, make it look like she's the one with the problem - hearing things, crazy lady)
Major Carter: Ok. Well could you just bring up the data on this gate address?
Me: (Sure thing Sweet Cheeks - that time I manage just to think it (I'm not suicidal)). Yes Mam. (God MC is HOT when she's mad. and when she smiles. and when she breathes. ok pull yourself together - this may be the only chance you get to impress her with your vast intelligence) I engage the chevrons (and then I smile like a goon--- way to go dumbarse)
Major Carter: That's. nice, must be a errr challenging job
Me: Oh it is (wait is she mocking me? She better not be mocking me! I don't like to be mocked! Nothing makes a Chevron guy madder than someone mocking his chevron encoding skills... no no this is MC she's nice she would never mock anyone, she must be genuinely interested --my chances are looking up)
Colonel O'Neill: Hey Carter, Airman (Oh bugger not him. stupid, arrogant, thinks he's so great just because he's Colonel, please like its that hard)
Me: Sir (I manage to give a respectful nod)
Colonel O'Neill: So Carter what are you up to? (Is he hitting on her? He's hitting on my chick. I don't believe it. Not that MC and me are involved but the attraction is blatant. Well her attraction to me is - I on the other hand am far more subtle)
Major Carter: We were just looking up some information on P3X259 (We were? Oh yeah I'd better actually do that)
Colonel O'Neill: Sounds like fun
Me: Yeah its great (he's just jealous because she's spending time with me, everyone knows she won't give him the time of day. loser)
Colonel O'Neill: Carter you wana grab some breakfast?
Major Carter: Sure Sir (she turns to me) can you finish doing this and I'll meet up with you later
Me: Yes Mam (Oh she's saying meet up to talk chevrons but we both know what she really means - Sorry Colonel but MC is mine)
Major Carter: Ok, see you later
Me: Sure thing toots (though I waited for her to get out of hearing distance before adding 'toots'. ah life is good, MC wants me and as long as I don't have to eat any of her carrot cake I'll settle for being her boyfriend)
The End
Authors Note: Ok can you image what 'MC' would do to anyone who called her 'toots'? BAMM a punch in the nose. Realised while writing this that Colonel O'Neill initialled is CO just like 'commanding officer' - how exciting. Anyway I know this wasn't a proper romance for CG and I will give him one, I just wanted to show how smooth he is with the ladies. Please make my day and Review, toodles