"What is it that has hurt you so bad you sail for the Undying Lands, without a word to me?"

The upset in Elladan's voice clenched Elrohir's heart so painfully he let out a sob.

Elladan, heart breaking at the noise of distress he had not heard from anyone in a long time impulsively moved forward and took his brother in his arms, relieved when Elrohir did not fight him. "Tell me all," he begged when the twin remained silent as he rocked him in his arms. "Tell me so that I may help you bear this burden,"

At length Elrohir drew a shuddering sigh. And so the purging begins. "I love someone."

Inwardly Elladan gave a moan. Glorfindel had been right all along; he would have to make sure and not tell him of that fact. Stroking his brother's hair Elladan guessed. "They do not return your love? Tell me who it is, and I will make them love you," he demanded.

Elrohir laughed ruefully. "It is not so simple as that. They love me, but not as a lover." He pulled back slightly to look into Elladan's eyes, letting his guard down and their bond reopened, Elrohir allowing all of his unspoken words of desire pour out.

Such longing poured into his soul, so much craving and want flooded into him that Elladan gasped, unsure of where Elrohir's yearning ended and his own began. Elladan had never though of his brother or of males as such until now but their souls were so akin that the moment the possibility hit him his heart was lost, and he did not have any intention of retrieving it.

Feeling comprehension dawn in his brother Elrohir said softly, "And that is why I must go."

"Oh. I will go with you!"

"No." Shaking his head Elrohir said soothingly, "That would defeat the purpose, dear brother. I go from you to escape this."

Elladan started to weep, clinging to his twin. "Our souls are as one; to part ways would slay us!"

"So emotional, always so emotional my dear brother." Cradling his dark head to his chest Elrohir murmured, "Better to die with your soul but without your body, Elladan, than to have both and face banishment and to bring shame to Adar."

"Elrohir, I do not care! Why must you be so reasonable? I want to bond to you and it is selfish but; I do not care!"

The look on his twins face was so earnest, so pleading and the bond of brotherhood between them was so intense that Elrohir broke and began to weep also. "Do not ask that of me, of us; this double sin of male-male incest! When we are slain by our kin we could not even pass to Mandos!" Elrohir struggled to get up, to run away from his brother who clung to him so insistent and needy but Elladan pinned him down, grabbing his face in his hands and kissing him in a clumsy first attempt.

"Then our Fëa would be without a home but we would be together, wandering but together, for all time," he whispered breathlessly, pulling back only slightly so his breath tickled his twin's face, his hands starting to snake up beneath the hem of his tunic.

Beneath him Elrohir let out a sob of defeat, of want, of mourning for the loss of life they would never have and those that were left behind. "If we bond all would be able to tell by looking at us; what is written in our hearts will be written in our eyes…Adar will be shamed…how will we face them? How can we do this?"

"If we do not and we are separated, we will die; if we bond, we shall be slain…" Elladan feathered his ignorant lips over his brother's once again. "Let us take this one night that we have for our own; you are shaking, and I can feel the throb of your soul, my brother. I know it is not from lack of want that you refuse."

Elrohir groaned at the thought of what they could have. "Must you always rush into things?"

"It has always been my way." With great effort Elladan released Elrohir from his grasp and backed slowly away to the door. "But if you are abject then let us do this. Tomorrow after evening meal and when all have gone to bed I will come to you, and if you still desire to sail for Valinor, then you will leave once and for all. If not, we will bond?" Elladan watched Elrohir close his eyes, swallowing hard and he could feel him fighting to control the pulse of physical desire raging between the two of them.

"And if we bond, what then?"

Elladan did not reply but Elrohir could feel his answer.

"Yes," Elrohir said softly. "Yes, you are right, but we must not do it in Adar's realm."

When Elrohir awoke the next morning he had made his decision, and had determined himself to make himself scarce around Elladan for the day. Skipping morning meal and ignoring the silvery chime that preceded it he headed out to the stable, in hopes that he could spend the day astride Pelro and in welcome solitude.

The warm, sunny stable was nearly vacant as most of the horses had chosen to wander freely through the sun bathed valley at their leisure. Licking his lips Elrohir whistled, leaning on the stall door that opened into the stable aisle, waiting for his black mare to come through the opposite end that opened into the outside.

"Oh,"

Elrohir turned to see Glorfindel coming into the stable and in turn whistled for Asfaloth.

The blond Elda turned and smiled. "I am surprised that you are not with Elladan this morning. He has just left with Celro; perhaps you will join him?"

Pursing his lips Elrohir turned to stroke Pelro's nose as she came to the stall and nudged her elf expectantly. "Actually…I…thought I might spend my day indoors." He could not look Glorfindel in the eye; all of a sudden it seemed the Elda's keen blue eyes would be able to see his innermost thoughts…nearly as bad as Galadriel.

Shifting his weight to one leg Glorfindel surveyed the dark haired elf across from him. "Something is not right, Elrohir. Your brother has noticed it as well as your Adar and I." When Elrohir made no answer Glorfindel said gently, "I know you are not accustomed to opening your thoughts and heart, but –"

"You stand correct," Elrohir said sharply, turning to go. "I am not going to open my heart and thoughts on this matter."

Glorfindel said nothing, sadness tugging at his heart as he threw one leg over Asfaloth and they rode out into the lushness of the valley. "Go on," he encouraged Asfaloth, "This will be your ride today," and at his elf's prompting the white horse nickered and took off into the valley.

In the distance, a dark figure on a horse raised an arm in greeting, and Asfaloth took of toward it, eventually drawing abreast of Celro and the horses touched noses. "Elladan," Glorfindel greeted. "I just saw your brother leave the stable,"

Elladan scowled. "Elrohir is out riding? I think then I will go back inside," he started to nudge Celro with his heels.

"No, Elrohir decided to not go out of a ride," the Elda said slowly, wondering at this change in the twins.

"Well, then," Elladan turned Celro around. "Let us stay out, and race over to the nearest waterfall?"

Night had fallen and Elrohir was perched in his window ledge, staring out at the sky with his decision firmly in place. "Come in," he called when there was a soft knock at the door.

At first Elrond said nothing as he stood beside his son in the starlight, remembering the bitter sweetness of his wife's passing to Valinor so many years ago. "Elladan said to nullify your plans to go West, until I heard other wise from you," he started, smiling to himself as he remembered Elladan's vehemence. "I take it you have spoken with each other since yesterday morning?"

"We have," Elrohir did not turn to look at his father. "I will leave Imladris late tomorrow morning."

Elrond lowered his head slightly. "You will not tell me why you chose to leave?"

"You will find out tomorrow, Adar, perhaps."

"As you wish then. Goodnight, Elrohir." Elrond turned to leave and felt his son stand and embrace him from behind.

"Goodnight and goodbye, Adar. I will miss you."

Turning the elf lord returned Elrohir's embrace. "I will miss you as well."

Elrohir sat patiently in his window and listened as the sounds of the house grew quieter, the singing of lore gradually turning to the gentle purr of a single lullaby, and Elladan slipped into his room as silently as a shadow. The latch caught with a soft click and Elladan leaned against the wooden paneling, waiting, reaching out to his brother with his soul.

"Lock the door, Elladan," Elrohir said without turning from the window.

Hope mixed with dread flared in Elladan's heart as he did as he was bid, turning the small latch, locking the entrance against any possible intrusion. Crossing the room to the window he sat beside Elrohir, who gazed pensively out at the stars.

"Look, there is Eärendil, shining bright as always." Elrohir paused and licked his lips. "Do you think he can see what we are doing?"

"If he does, I hope he does not tell Adar."

Elrohir turned to look at his brother, taking one hand. "I will bond with you tonight, Elladan, not sailing for Valinor, and am ready and willing to accept what must follow our union." Reaching behind him he drew the curtain so that the bright starlight glowed faintly behind the thick panel. "And so we begin our end."

Elladan had moved to sit on the bed and was reaching for the tiny clasps that ran along the hidden seam at his shoulder but Elrohir, moving off his perch at the window, raised his hand. "No, brother, do not rush into this," he reached the bed. "It would be my pleasure."

"Elladan," Glorfindel knocked gently on the door. "Elladan," when there was still no answer and the Elda opened the door slowly, to be greeted by an empty bed chamber awash in the pale glow of the dawn. Where is Elladan? "Did Elladan and Elrohir both leave for the Havens? They did not bid farewell to me," With a half mock expression of insult Glorfindel poked his head into Elrond's sitting room, where the elf lord was pouring over a large book with Erestor.

With a frown Elrond looked up. "Elrohir said that he would be leaving this morning, but I did not know that Elladan had chosen to go. But I suppose it is not a great surprise, as they are inseparable. I will write the Havens to inform them of both my sons impending arrivals."

The one night that they could have together, breaking all acknowledgement of kinship as it was overridden as they joined as lovers, ended as the glow of Eärendil was replaced by the more insistent light of the sun as dawn crept over Imladris.

"My brother," Elrohir stopped his horse at the edge of the dell. "Are you ready to say farewell?" Solemnly the twins gazed down at the valley, sparkeling in the sunlight as a haven in the wilderness, a place where they were now not safe. Good bye, Adar; we do this because we love you. "Where shall we go, to finish?"

"The Misty Mountains. We will not be found there, even when all is done."

With a sigh Elrohir agreed. "Yes. Have you a plot to get past the border guards? Other than," he said quickly, glancing side long at his twin, "Riding really fast?"

"You do not think that they will simply let us pass?"

"No, for they will see in our eyes exactly what we fear they will see and our journey to the Mountains will be unnecessary."

For a short while they rode in pensive silence.

For all the fear of discovery and hiding we face for the next days to come, until we reach our destiny, this will be the few last days that I treasure. I love and am loved freely, and that is all one needs, Elladan reflected and as Elrohir looked over to him and smiled, he knew his brother could hear his thoughts and felt the very same.

Dawn of the next day found the elves nearing the border, and Elladan said slowly, "I have a thought as to get past the guards. We will go separately and in different places, for surely if we went together we would be given away, but if we went independently it would only be known that we were bound."

"Then we shall separate and meet at the mouth of the Pass of the Misty Mountains?"

"Yes, that is what should be best." Elladan squeezed his twin's arm briefly. "Farewell,"

"But not for long,"

What do you mean, Cirdan, that my sons have not arrived to the Grey Havens? Elrond glared at the parchment unrolled before him on his desk, but it did not change the words it bore. Perhaps they are just late…perhaps they ran into trouble on the journey there.

"Greetings, son of Elrond," a young Imladris border guard raised one hand in salute as the black mare strode past, arching her neck and tossing her head for she was in high spirits. "You have business through the Misty Mountains again? Where is your brother? I have rarely seen you apart." He smiled conversationally as his father, who was on horseback, approached him from behind.

Elladan narrowed his eyes and sighed. "Business, indeed," he replied without smiling. I do not like the way the elder looks at me for he can see what the other does not, Elladan thought as he met the eyes of the older, wiser elf, and looked back into the merry, naive eyes of the first. "It is nothing of grave concern though,"

The young elf nodded a little bemused as the dark haired twin continued on under the afternoon sun. It was not like Elladan to be so reserved; he usually enjoyed a brief stop and conversation while it was Elrohir who preferred to continue briskly on his way, but this time Elladan did not stop or dismount.

"I had not heard word that the son or sons of Elrond had married to any, but it would not be surprising as they are more than of age." When his son looked at him in surprise, he smiled at his innocence and continued, "Could you not tell from his eyes? Hmm. At any rate, I came to inform you that I am riding back to Imladris as it is time for the weekly report."

"Oh, Lindir has a message from Mirkwood that must be taken as well. He was hoping that you could…?"

"Thank you, I shall stop and see Lindir before I leave." The older elf nudged his horse and continued on his way. He had not traveled far when there was the approaching sound of hoof beats, light on the springy turf. Surprised, the elf turned. "Elladan! No, Elrohir," he called, as the other twin emerged through the trees.

Elrohir looked to see where the voice hailed from, and nodded briefly in greeting before clicking his tongue to his black mare and continuing on at a slightly increased pace.

It was not unlike Elrohir to be brief in his exchange with the border guards for it was known that he opened to few. What surprised the elf was the new knowledge that both the sons of Elrond had been bound in marriage, and he had heard no news of either's bonding. He shrugged to himself. Still, even under the tranquility of the late afternoon, something nagged at the back of his mind that he could just not place.

Behind him Elrohir's mind was racing. Once out of sight the dark haired elf leaned forward and whispered to his mare and she sprang forward with new urgency.

He knows I am bound, Elrohir said to himself, anxiety growing in his chest. Does he know it is Elladan?

Worries, anxiety, apprehension tumbled over each other in his mind creating a hard knot of fear that turned into irritation as he reached his destination to wait.

And wait.

Has something happened? No, that cannot be for I would have felt it…What is it then? What could be keeping Elladan? Dismounting Elrohir sank down into the grass, fidgeting restlessly. Picking a daisy from its tender stem he pulled one petal off after another, rolling the velvety white between his thumb and forefinger and flicking it away into the grass. No, nothing is wrong for Pelro is calm. She could sense distress in her twin as I can in mine, and we are both at peace.

The sun was sinking in the West when finally a figure appeared over the crest of the hill. Elladan cantered forward to where his twin stood, grinning. "You worry too much, my brother."

"I worry when you are late," Elrohir reprimanded gently.

"It was necessary to take the long path to keep encounters to a minimum." The dark haired elf put a tender hand on his brother's shoulder, leaning forward earnestly as careless, silky locks that blew around his eyes. "I trust you had no difficulty?"

For brief moment of hesitation, Elrohir thought of the elderly border guard who now rode back to Imadris. "No," he reached up and smoothed away the locks from is brother's face. "No difficulty. Let us take a brief rest before we continue on our journey."