Chapter 5
Kal Kally
It would have been a perfect romantic dinner, Kurapika thought as he stepped into the room and took a look at the surroundings. The room was well decorated. With one glance, he could tell its furniture was ancient and very expensive. But what was most impressive about the room lied in its style. The dark shades of black and crimson of the walls and most furniture blended into each other very well, creating an effect of allure and mystery. The room was brightened up by the light from the candles on the table at the middle of the room.
He had discovered one more side of Kuroro today. Kurapika had never thought that a person like Kuroro could possess such a sense of style and beauty. A dry chuckle escaped his lips. For a moment, he even thought that under the aloof mask, Kuroro might be a delicate being.
Such a ridiculous idea, Kurapika thought as he stepped to the table. Even though he had learnt earlier at lunch that Kuroro could be damn good at cooking when the man wanted to, he still got speechless as his eyes landed on the table. Everything looked so good and delicious. One would think a professional cook, not a criminal, prepared this.
Kuroro hadn't been here yet, so he moved to stand by a large open window. Such a beautiful night it was. The sea was calm. Faintly, Kurapika heard the sound of waves clashing to the shore and felt the salty breeze tapping on his face. Such a peaceful night.
Kurapika looked up and saw the golden moon on the dark sky. For some reasons, the moon looked so sad, so lonely, even if it was surrounded by thousands of twinkling stars. He sighed as his eyes returned to the Earth. There was no point in letting himself slipping further away from reality.
Kuroro still hadn't come, and the man was the one that insisted on this dinner in the first place. Kurapika started to feel uneasy, and suspicion slowly made its way back to him. How could he forget? He wasn't here to enjoy the company of a friend, or a lover. He was here to confront an enemy. There was no place for romance in the life of people like him. There was no place for trust in a world where people must lie and trick to survive.
Where was Kuroro? What if the man was connecting with the Genei Ryodan, and all of this display was only a trap? His hand subconsciously pressed on his heart. It hurt. To know that he was falling for his enemy's gentle treatment was painful enough, yet to know that tenderness was only a lie was excruciating.
"Spare your brain of unnecessary thoughts," said a voice behind him, "thinking too much won't do anything good for your current condition."
His heart stopped for a second, then Kurapika scowled and turned around, intended to throw back a retort. However, all words died on his lips as he stared at the other. Kuroro clad only in black and let his black loose. There was nothing in him that reminded Kurapika of light and purity, but in the glows of candles, all malice had lost on his face. Indeed, Kuroro did look like an angel. 'A fallen angel', Kurapika added silently.
"Why are you still standing there?" Kuroro asked and approached him.
Kurapika tensed, feeling like a trapped animal. His mind told him to strike, whispering to him that Kuroro was only either trying to use him or toying with his thoughts. But as Kuroro's eyes continued to drown him in their depth, the voice of his mind became more distant, and more distant, then faded.
"Come here", Kuroro said and offered Kurapika his hand.
"I'm not a woman." Kurapika scowled, but accepted the other's hand and let himself be guided back to the table.
The dinner was spent in silent. Kurapika focused only on his plates. He didn't dare to look up, as he could feel the intense of Kuroro's eyes on him all the time. At some point during the dinner, the feeling became too unbearable. Kurapika snapped his head up in annoyance. He looked at the other accusingly, but as predicted, he met Kuroro's eyes, immediately froze and turned away.
"Why don't you have anything?" Kurapika asked quietly. "You plate wasn't even touched."
Lifting his glass and taking a sip of red wine, Kuroro only smiled a half-hearted smile. His eyes still didn't left Kurapika. Kurapika started to feel his anger rising up. "Answer me, dammit! And stop staring at me!"
"Why must I stop?" Kuroro just said, "Only you can fulfill this hunger I feel."
Catching the innuendo, Kurapika blushed. "You're talking nonsense."
"And besides, all of this was made specially for you, and only for you."
This sentence, Kurapika had heard before. A wave of sadness hit him hard; he dropped his folk, having lost his appetite.
"What's wrong?" Kuroro frowned.
"I... you make me thought of a departure meal." Kurapika murmured.
"A what?"
"A departure meal. In my land, there's a tradition that whenever someone has to leave the clan to go far away, the whole family would gather and hold a departure meal to say goodbye to that person, and express their love for him. Sometimes, it's the whole tribe, which depends on the position of that person in the clan. The meal is made for that person alone, so usually, only that person would eat, others just watch him silently."
"How does it feel?"
"Sad, feeling almost as if everyone knew that it was the last time they could see their beloved one." Kurapika said, feeling his voice break. He totally missed the sadness that clouded Kuroro's eyes momentarily.
"I see." Suddenly Kuroro's voice turned cold. "So that's why you survive."
"What?"
"I was wondering why that tribe still has a survival left. We have cleared that region so thoroughly that even grass wouldn't be able to grow there!"
"Shut up! How dare you!" Kurapika screamed and sprang to his feet. He called his nen, but then stared at his hand in disbelief as no chain formed.
"You haven't recovered yet, remember?" Kuroro said at his side. Kurapika froze, didn't expect the other to move that fast. Before he could gain back his sense and react, Kuroro grabbed his upper arm and pulled him hard. His back slammed at the other chest. Kuroro's hand moved up to wrap around his throat threateningly, while the other hand pressed at his abdomen, held him immobile.
"Where is your perfect self-control now?" Kuroro's voice was mocking. "Why did you lose it? Scarlet eyes? Are you afraid of me?"
"Release me!" Kurapika cried and struggled, but even when he was at his best, his physical strength didn't match that of Kuroro.
"Why must I?" There was a faint laughter that sent shivers down his spines. "Do you know how you drive me crazy? After so many years of feeling nothing, wanting no one, suddenly you appear and make me feel. Well, are you going to take responsibility now?"
Kurapika's anger was slowly changing into panic as he felt the hand on this throat tighten and the other slide under his shirt. To his horror, the feeling of Kuroro caressing his skin sent flashes of guilty pleasure through his brain. Against his will, his struggle ceased. "You wouldn't dare!" His threat was cut off by a gasp as Kuroro's hand either accidentally or purportedly brushed over his nipple.
"Would I?" Kuroro sneered. Kurapika winced as the man grasped a fistful of his hair and yanked his head back, making their eyes lock. "Don't you know how vulnerable you're right now?"
Kuroro's eyes was glittering a strange light. Kurapika was surprised to find there was no malice, just hunger, and something else, something much more frightening.
"Why can't you look at me with only fear?" Those eyes hardened, and the next second, Kurapika's back hit the floor hard. His tongue tasted of blood, as he must have bitten his lips in the effort to muffle a scream. Pain radiated through his body from his side. Kurapika tried to sit up, but failed, as he was still dizzy from the sudden impact.
In his condition, Kurapika had no chance to get away when Kuroro joined him onto the floor, holding both his wrists up with one hand while keeping him imprison under the man's weight. "Get off me." Kurapika cried and tried to struggle harder, but only for a short moment as every move created burning pain. It felt like someone was stabbing him at his side again and again.
Kuroro leaned up, his lips warm on the other's neck, sucking the skin there, mindless of Kurapika's painful cries. "Are you feeling helpless yet?" Kuroro whispered. His mouth found the front of Kurapika's shirt, and the next moment, the sound of tearing clothes filled the room, shocked Kurapika into losing all his fight.
Suddenly the room was thrown into darkness. The only light was weak, coming from the stars and the moon that was now hovering above the line separated the sea and the sky. It took Kurapika a moment to realize all the candle had been burnt out. Kuroro paused, but then laughed. "Just when I needed. Isn't it more fun, chain guy?"
It wasn't fun, and it wasn't pleasant. The remaining of his clothes felt damp at his side, and Kurapika didn't have to see with his own eyes to know that the cloth there must have been soaked with blood. While he knew his technique enough to be sure that the Healing chain should have healed the wound completely, the pain radiated from there was too real to be denied. His eyes stung, all thought left his mind, leaving only terror and some kind of pain at the betrayal of his trust. Moonlight was spreading across the floor, slashing at darkness. Kurapika knew it must have framed his face with its dim brightness too, but above him, Kuroro's face remained hidden in darkness. This made him feel more vulnerable than ever.
"Please stop. You're hurting me." A whimper escaped his lips before he was aware of it. Kurapika turned his head away in shame, a tear slip out of his closed eyes and trailed to the floor.
Kuroro had stopped. The stronger man didn't move like he was frozen, his body tense. "What did you just say?" His voice was low and devoid of all emotions.
There was no way that he would repeat those shameful words again. Kurapika bit his lips and tried to hold on to his useless pride. "Go on. What are you waiting? Rape me if you wish, but I'll never summit to you. One day I'll eventually kill you." His words came out weak and trembling, much different from the harsh threat he wanted them to be.
Silence passed, then something wet and cold touch his cheek. The iron hold on his wrists was taken off at the same time. Kurapika blinked and looked up, but all what he could see was a dark shadow looming over him.
Another water drop... was it...?
Before anything could really form in Kurapika's head, Kuroro rolled away from him. He tried to push himself up and saw the criminal sitting with his back turned to him, his face hidden in his hand.
"Kuroro..." Kurapika hesitatingly touch the other's back. Somehow this silent, sad-looking Kuroro was far more depressing than the aggressive Kuroro of just a minute ago. "Kuroro?" He repeated, as the other didn't answer.
"Did I hurt you?" The voice was so faint that it was nearly lost in the sounds of wind and waves outside.
Kurapika didn't know how to answer. It did hurt. His body hurt like hell, and his mind was still torn with the image of a gentle Kuroro still carved into his memories. But as he listened to Kuroro's pained voice, he knew he couldn't say the truth. "No..." Kurapika looked down at his fingers and whispered.
"Liar." Kuroro laughed softly, his laughter full of bitterness.
"Why suddenly are you this way?" Kurapika rested his forehead on the other's back, feeling his own bitterness rising. "Why are you so hostile in one moment, then so nice to me in the next? Why acting as if you care?" It horrified him to find that his voice was shaking, but Kurapika couldn't help it. He blinked rapidly, trying not to cry, but soon tear fell, wetting his check and Kuroro's shirt. "Why don't you just hurt me, use me and let me have a reason to hate you? God, you have taken away from me enough already. This hatred is all what I have left. Why must you come and rob me of this last thing?"
Kuroro moved. Kurapika looked up to see the man had turned round. Kuroro wordlessly pulled him to his lap and let him rest against the man's strong chest. He tilted Kurapika's head up and kissed away the tears on his cheeks. It was hard to believe that the leader of the Genei Ryodan could possess such gentleness.
"I didn't mean it." Kuroro said sadly. "I always thought that people like us should never have feelings like this. But since I met you..."
"Stop." Kurapika whispered. Every of Kuroro's words hurt. They hurt so much, as even if his mind was screaming at him to stay alert in the presence of an enemy, his heart believed, or longed to believe that those words were real.
"All the things I have done..." Kuroro continued, ignoring Kurapika weak attempt. "Killing, stealing, destroying, losing myself to darkness... I have never really considered any of them a crime... but I think I have committed my first crime today."
"Kuroro... don't... that's enough..." Kurapika choked on his old tears. He knew what Kuroro was going to say. He craved for it, but still, he held onto a childish thought that if Kuroro didn't say anything, everything would still be the same, and they would be back to hating each other.
The arms around him tightened. The pain from his must-be-reopen wound was still throbbing, and the world started to spin. That was hardly important though. Not when Kuroro's words were still floating into his mind, hurting and awakening the part of his heart that had been turned into stone a long time ago. "I knew we aren't born for each other, yet I still... My heart aches for you. My thoughts keep returning to you. If this hunger is what people call love, then I think I have fallen hard. I think I love..."
And I too, Kurapika thought. He wanted to say something, but words couldn't form between his ragging breaths. In the end, he gave up trying and leaned up to wrap his arms around the other's neck. His lips locked with the other's in a passionate kiss. For a short moment, both physical and emotional pain faded as he simply enjoyed this closeness with Kuroro, and let the kiss say what he couldn't.
Kurapika wasn't aware when the kiss broke. He heard Kuroro calling his name from somewhere distant, but he couldn't even will his half-closed eyes to open. He felt himself falling, but then, since the day his tribe were murdered and their eyes were stolen, he had always been falling. Only that this time, there were strong arms catching him and supporting him. Was it a crime to enjoy the feeling of security provided by the one who had made him fall in the first place?
Fate was so unfair. But right now, Kurapika could hardly care. For he...
...was sliding into darkness.
End chapter 5.
