Hi, I've read some depressing poems today so I'm in that good angsty mood to write this. Maybe I'll spend some more time on it than I did the last half. I got a fiction press id now and you can check out my poems at SORRY FOR THE INSANITY. Yes, I do know that the contrast between some of the poems is great.
9/7/98
Oh shit Katie I can't believe it! He found you! He really found you. We're all in the hospital right now. We're all right by your bed. It doesn't look good. The doctors give you a ten- percent chance of coming out of the coma. You're really in bad shape. Oh shit Katie you're so pale and skinny.
We're all right here Katie, do you feel Oliver holding your hand? He asked him where he found you but he refuses to talk. The healers all insist we should go home. They say we're not doing anything productive and making ourselves all worked up. Healers, they have no heart particularly in the section where most patients don't recover. Oh Shit, I don't think anyone has ever recovered in here. This is where they put people with no hope. Oh please Katie, don't die. Don't die on us, we need you too much. Come on Katies, we're all here even if the healers push out the door and Oliver refuses to be moved. They're all trying to push him out the door but he won't move. He just hangs on to your hand. He won't give up on you and we won't either.
Angelina
9/10/98
I'll never forget how you looked when I found you. Right after I finished writing I apparated to New York City. I found you almost instantly, like you wanted to be found and knew I was coming. You were in an alleyway. I didn't recognize you at first, you were just another huddled ball in a dirty alley. You looked at up at me barely recognizing me. You whispered my name and collapsed in my arms, like you were hanging on all this time just for me to find you. You're so skinny and frail, I thought you would break if I held you too firmly but I thought you would disappear if I let you go. I'm still not sure that you're real. You were and still are burning with fever and you're pale like you've lost a lot of blood. What happened to you? Just wakeup and everything will be fine.
Love,
Oliver
9/14/98
Kay me girl, it's been a week. Yes it's been a whole bleeping week. (A/N I'm bleeping out the f curse beause I don't want to offend anyone but other profanities will not be bleeped so if you are offended I'm really sorry.) I think you look worse than when you came in. Still our beautiful Kay Tie, but you're too pale. We can could your ribs and I never want to be able to do that again. When you wake up we're taking you to mum's house and she's going to feed you good and proper. Where were you? Oliver still refuses to talk though I could have sworn he said thank you when I handed him a cup of yogurt. Then again he didn't eat it. He hasn't moved (or changed.) It's got to be romantic but it's not pleasant for the rest of us so wake up so Oliver can take a shower. Ok? That's an order. Stop being a drama queen and wake up.
Fred
P.S. We're going to pull a huge prank when you wake up so wake up so you can see it.
9/19/98
You are marrying a madman. He's almost worse than when you were missing. He hasn't moved or talked in days. He just sits there holding our hand. He refuses to be sent home to sleep. I would think he doesn't sleep but George told me he caught Oliver dozing one time but I'm not sure if I believe it.
You missed your family's funerals but the unveiling is in a year and you'll be better by then, right? If you won't wake up for us, wake up because you know your family would like you to honor them by going to the unveiling.
Griffindor chasers have to stick together, you can't just leave and leave Angelina and me. You can't have a chaser team of two, you need three to form the triangle we worked on for hours and didn't even tell Oliver about. You remember that? We worked for weeks to get that right and did it in that game against the Slytherins. Those Slytherins were pissing in their knickers. They didn't see what hit them. Even Oliver was impressed. Remember? We need you back to do that and no one else could replace you. Who is going to make sure Oliver doesn't go on about Quidditch if you're not here? Who is going to remind Angelina that the ministry doesn't mean everything and no they don't control the world. Who is going to laugh with Fred and put George in his place? Who's going to listen to my silly complaints? We need you Katie.
Alicia
9/22/98
Hi Katie,
You look so peaceful when sleeping, ok, you resemble more of a sleeping corpse, but still. Maybe you're sleeping beauty and you'll wake up when the handsome prince played by Oliver gives you a kiss. Volde is the evil fairy and the rest of are the kingdom that goes to sleep with sleeping beauty.
Mum, Dad, Bill, Charlie, Ron, Ginny, Harry and Hermione came to visit yesterday. Harry's going to be an Auror. He's going to be an assistant to Moody. He's also dating my baby sister so he had better watch it. If he makes one wrong move, Bill, Charlie, Fred, Ron and me will beat him up and do not tell me we're being over protective and that Ginny can take care of herself. Don't lecture me on being an older brother. You're not even awake and you're yelling at me for doing something stupid. See Kates? You're such a part of all of us that you yell at me in my head. I think I'm going crazy.
Oh SHIT! Katie your heart just stopped. The machine is making that beeping sound and the line is straight! You're not breathing. Oh shit this is not happening. Katie Anne Bell! You cut that out right now or I'll call you KAB for the rest of my life and I'll make sure they use KAB on your gravestone! That's right I'm not joking so come back so I won't. Come on Katie, you've been technically dead for a full minute, people have been 'dead' for longer, you can come back.
Oliver is shaking your shoulders, trying to wake you up. I've never seen him cry before.
Good girl Katie! Your heart has started again. You were 'dead' for two whole minutes, well that's something you can brag about to people. What was it like? I don't really care, don' do that again. Stop making up worry, wake up.
George
10/5/98
Without you,
the ground thaws,
the rain falls,
the grass grows.
Without you,
the seeds root,
the flowers bloom,
the children play.
The stars gleam,
the poets dream, the
eagles fly, without you.
The earth turns,
the sun burns,
but I die,
without you.
I remember how you looked when I met you for the first time. You were on Angelina's tire swing at her Grandmother's house. Angelina was inside getting lemonade from her grandmother for the two of you. I remember that I loved you from that instant. I loved how you smiled as the tire swung back and forth, how your hair caught the sun, how your eyes burned with curiosity and love around you. I loved how you swung higher that you were supposed to and how every once in a while you would yell at Angelina that you wanted to swing over the branch. They tell me no one falls in love when they're seven years old, but I did and I never stopped.
I'm not good at putting how I feel into words. Why do you think it took me fourteen years to tell you that I love you? Do you remember our first kiss? You probably wouldn't seeing as how you were asleep at the time. I was ten and you were eight. You had fallen asleep with your head on my shoulder. Angelina and Alicia where off somewhere else and had left the two of us behind. I remember how pretty you looked and I bent over and kissed you. If you're not supposed to find your soul mate when you're seven, you're not supposed to kiss them when you're ten.
I'm sorry that I stole your first kiss from you without you realizing it. Remember I made you that crow of dandelions that I claimed my mum had made? I'll make you another one. I'll make you one everyday. I'll fill the flat with flowers as long as you come back to enjy them. Those are my conditions.
I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as you're living,
My Katie you'll be.
Oliver
Without You
The Eyes Gaze
The Legs Walk
The Lungs Breathe
The Mind Churns
The Heart Yearns
The Tears Dry
Without You
Life Goes On
But I'm Gone
Cause I Died
Excerpts from WITHOUT YOU which is a song from RENT it is not mine. I'm leaving you here for now.
