Chapter 5 - Past Tense
[Note: the next chapter was, I felt, too long, so I cut it in half.]
(...the center...a month later...)
Helga and Victor are again sitting at the table in the room facing each other.
"I cannot believe this, Helga. It's been a month - one month of role-playing and self-reflection - and we've made no process."
"What can I say? That's life."
"Somehow, I don't think your trying."
"Oh, but I am. I'm trying very hard to be a walking sugar cube; the sweetest, nicest person in the world."
"There's your sarcasm again. You must be a hit with the guys."
"Get bent."
"You know what I think? These exercises have done nothing to relieve you of your anger. You need to release it."
Victor puts his arm on the table.
"Want to arm-wrestle?"
"Arm-wrestle?"
"As a warm-up."
"Okay. I'll try not to go too easy on you."
Their hands lock and they struggle for victory. Victor is surprised at the strength of his opponent.
"Impressive."
"Thanks."
"Tell me, why don't you want to get better. Why are you so filled with hate?"
"You sure you been checking that file, Vic?"
"Childhood neglect. That is very sad. How did that turn out?"
"Moved out after graduating high school; put them behind me."
"So why are you still so angry?"
"None of your business!"
"What if I make it my business?"
"What do you want from me?"
"Answers."
"Why don't you just give up?"
"I don't give up on things I care about."
Helga starts to push down on Victor's hand.
"News flash: this is who I choose to be. I have a right to be angry!"
"I understand where you're coming from, Helga. I, myself, had a rough childhood. It's okay to act out..."
Victor turns the tables on Helga and pushes her hand toward the table.
"...but what's acceptable at nine years of age is downright insufferable when you're an adult."
He slams her hand down.
"Just so you know, I hate you right now."
"Oh, you hate me?"
"Yes."
"Then hit me."
"Excuse me?"
"You hate me, right? Then hit me."
"You're serious?"
"Like a stroke. You can't release your rage if you don't release it."
Helga gets up from her chair.
"That mantra alone makes me wanna hit you."
"Then what's stopping you? Afraid you'll hurt yourself?"
With that, Helga knocks Victor to the floor. During his moments on the floor, Helga shakes her hand; it had been a while since she put the Five Avengers to work. Victor sits up and wipes the blood from his nose. He looks up at her with a smile on his face.
"How do you feel now?"
"Surprisingly...I feel better."
(...the center...a week later...)
"Now, Helga, you mentioned last week that you put your family behind you."
"Yeah..."
"Did you put your family behind you, or their neglect?"
"All of the above."
"At last, some progress! Not the 'family' thing, but the fact that you've left behind such a painful chapter of your life."
"It wasn't easy, let me tell you."
"Letting go of anger rarely is, Helga. Though it still doesn't explain why you blew up at the airport."
Helga looks off.
"What happened between graduating high school and six weeks ago? A friend's death, mugging, an old boyfriend, perhaps?"
The word 'boyfriend' caused Helga to sit back in her chair, a sad look on her face.
(...an airport...five years ago...)
Having deplaned, Helga walks into the lobby of an airport. She's not three steps out the door when she sees Arnold looking in her direction. College had seen them together in the briefest of flings and Helga felt that they might have another chance.
He runs toward her and she opens her arms, hoping to catch him in a hug, but he instead runs into the arms of a dark-haired woman. Helga watches and feels her heart shatter as the two of them smother each other in kisses. Arnold turns to see Helga.
"Hey, Helga."
"Hey, Arnold."
The woman nudges him.
"Oh, this is Cheryl."
"Pleased to meet you", the brunette said, extending a hand.
"Pleasure's all yours", replied Helga.
"So what brings you here?"
"My first book signing. I'm hoping 'The Secret' is a big seller."
"That's nice. Well, Cheryl and I have to be going."
"You got anything planned?", Helga asked nervously.
"I'm sure we'll think of something", Cheryl said, winking at Arnold.
"It was nice seeing you again, Helga."
"Yeah. See you around."
A deep scowl developed on Helga's face as she watched Arnold and Cheryl walk away.
(...the center...)
"It seems to me like you have one more hurdle to jump before you can get back to your regular life."
"What? I don't know what you're talking about", Helga stated as she turned away from Victor.
He walks to try and face her, but she turns away again.
"You're still angry about this. If you don't find a way to let this go, your anger will consume you and, pretty soon, you'll have nothing left except that one wish: that you were never born."
Victor stares into Helga's eyes.
"Is that really what you want, Helga?"
"No. It's not."
(...Helga's bedroom...that night...)
Helga tossed and turned in her bed, memories of her sessions with Victor flooding her head:
"Do you know why you're here?"..."There's your sarcasm again."..."...what's acceptable at nine years of age is downright insufferable when you're an adult."..."You can't release your rage if you don't release it."..."If you don't find a way to let this go, your anger will consume you and, pretty soon, you'll have nothing left except that one wish: that you were never born."..."Is that really what you want, Helga?"..."I don't give up on things I care about."
It was this last bit of dialogue that struck a chord in Helga.
(...the center...the next day...)
"So, how's my favorite irate charge?"
"Fine."
"What, no cutting remarks, no defense mechanisms? Is something wrong?"
"Probably. I thought about what you said yesterday. I still think I have a right to my anger, but I don't want it to consume me."
"You're serious?"
"Very. I've got a career to live for, and someone to be with."
"Who is he?"
Helga gets up and walks toward Victor.
"Well, he works with people, helping them to better themselves."
"Huh. Sounds familiar."
"He should."
Helga kisses Victor on the cheek.
"Does this mean what I assume it means?"
"You shouldn't assume."
With that, Helga and Victor kiss passionately.
