Disclaimer: Me no own LOTR. Me no own SC. Me no own anything. Gaa! No sue!
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And now our feature presentation. i AT In Mary Sue Land: Fellowship of the Ring /i
A happy, smiling sun rose over Middle Earth. Birds sang happily as they greeted the dawn. It was so peaceful. No one there could possibly be unhappy. Truly Eru had blessed this spot. The grass was the brightest green and the sky was a cheery blue. Nearby, a river gurgled gleefully. Even the fish in the river were really, really, really ha- "GODAMMIT!"
Ah. I see our brave young heroine has awoken. Sprawled across the path was none other than the authoress Astrid Tinuvial. She joyfully rose and greeted the sun.
"GODAMMIT! Where the hell am I? Damn damn damn damn damn!" she screamed.
Suddenly she heard people coming down the path. She dove into the bushes when she saw who was coming.
"What the hell? Aragorn, Sam, Merry, and Pippin? Where the hell am I?!?!? Godammit!" asked the authoress trying to assess the situation.
AT watched as the party passed. She heard little tidbits of conversations. From what she heard our super smart protagonist figured out they were heading to Rivendell.
"They must be going to meet up with Frodo. I really hate that little blighter," AT said to herself. "Still can't figure out why the hell I'm here. If I'm in Middle Earth, it's most likely that I mess up the storyline. That would mean I'm a *cringe* Mary Sue."
"You are absolutely correct," said a somewhat familiar voice behind her. AT quickly spun around so she could see the speaker.
"SC, what the hell?! Godammit! Did you do this to me?!" she inquired. "And what the hell are you wearing?! Are you sitting on a llama?!?!?!"
The person this question was directed to was AT's best friend Syth Colbalt, or SC for short. Dressed in flowing robes she was seated atop a llama. She laughed manically and replied, "Of course I did it. Who else would?"
"But why?!"
"Because you always call me and rant about the horrible Mary Sue's you have read all the freaking time!"
"Godammit! That is no reason to make me a Mary Sue. Do you realize how much damage we could do to the beloved sub-creator's work?!?!"
"Only you will be doing the damage, AT. No one can see me unless I want them to."
"Godammit SC! Get me the hell out of here! Now!!!!"
"You will leave according to my terms."
"And what god damned, f*cked up terms might those be?!"
"Tsk tsk. Language, AT. These are my terms. You have two weeks to complete three tasks. If you do not complete them in said time period, you will be stuck in Middle Earth forever."
"Agh! GODAMMIT! What the hell kind of tasks do I have to do?!"
SC laughed to herself and dismounted her llama. "You have to complete the three main objectives of a Mary Sue. First you must join the fellowship. Then you need to slay something, preferable an orc or urk-hai. And lastly you must kiss one of the male leads."
"Screw you. Did your god damn llama help you think that up?!"
"YOU DID NOT JUST INSULT MY LLAMA! You do not insult Bob. Poor Bob." SC pats her llama on the head and begins talking in a babyish voice to it. "Who's a good llama? Yes you are, yes you are. You are the bestest llama in the whole Middle Earth. Such a good llama. Yes you are! I wuv you Bob! Yes I d-"
"Godammit! Shut the hell up you blathering idiot! How the hell am I suppose to join the fellowship?!"
"Well Rivendell is right over there. Let's go speak with Lord Elrond."
"Oh godammit."
END OF CHAPPIE 1!
A/N: Hey y'all! You likey? Reviewy! SC and me are righting this together so you can drop her a message to if you wanna. This is going to be major funny (I hope) so y'all are in for a wild ride. Get ready for invisible catfights, flying llama rides, and much much more!
Just a note: If you want to review, but your not sure how, it's actually very easy. You clicky the purty blue button, typey stuffs in the boxy, and clicky the send button. Yayz!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And now our feature presentation. i AT In Mary Sue Land: Fellowship of the Ring /i
A happy, smiling sun rose over Middle Earth. Birds sang happily as they greeted the dawn. It was so peaceful. No one there could possibly be unhappy. Truly Eru had blessed this spot. The grass was the brightest green and the sky was a cheery blue. Nearby, a river gurgled gleefully. Even the fish in the river were really, really, really ha- "GODAMMIT!"
Ah. I see our brave young heroine has awoken. Sprawled across the path was none other than the authoress Astrid Tinuvial. She joyfully rose and greeted the sun.
"GODAMMIT! Where the hell am I? Damn damn damn damn damn!" she screamed.
Suddenly she heard people coming down the path. She dove into the bushes when she saw who was coming.
"What the hell? Aragorn, Sam, Merry, and Pippin? Where the hell am I?!?!? Godammit!" asked the authoress trying to assess the situation.
AT watched as the party passed. She heard little tidbits of conversations. From what she heard our super smart protagonist figured out they were heading to Rivendell.
"They must be going to meet up with Frodo. I really hate that little blighter," AT said to herself. "Still can't figure out why the hell I'm here. If I'm in Middle Earth, it's most likely that I mess up the storyline. That would mean I'm a *cringe* Mary Sue."
"You are absolutely correct," said a somewhat familiar voice behind her. AT quickly spun around so she could see the speaker.
"SC, what the hell?! Godammit! Did you do this to me?!" she inquired. "And what the hell are you wearing?! Are you sitting on a llama?!?!?!"
The person this question was directed to was AT's best friend Syth Colbalt, or SC for short. Dressed in flowing robes she was seated atop a llama. She laughed manically and replied, "Of course I did it. Who else would?"
"But why?!"
"Because you always call me and rant about the horrible Mary Sue's you have read all the freaking time!"
"Godammit! That is no reason to make me a Mary Sue. Do you realize how much damage we could do to the beloved sub-creator's work?!?!"
"Only you will be doing the damage, AT. No one can see me unless I want them to."
"Godammit SC! Get me the hell out of here! Now!!!!"
"You will leave according to my terms."
"And what god damned, f*cked up terms might those be?!"
"Tsk tsk. Language, AT. These are my terms. You have two weeks to complete three tasks. If you do not complete them in said time period, you will be stuck in Middle Earth forever."
"Agh! GODAMMIT! What the hell kind of tasks do I have to do?!"
SC laughed to herself and dismounted her llama. "You have to complete the three main objectives of a Mary Sue. First you must join the fellowship. Then you need to slay something, preferable an orc or urk-hai. And lastly you must kiss one of the male leads."
"Screw you. Did your god damn llama help you think that up?!"
"YOU DID NOT JUST INSULT MY LLAMA! You do not insult Bob. Poor Bob." SC pats her llama on the head and begins talking in a babyish voice to it. "Who's a good llama? Yes you are, yes you are. You are the bestest llama in the whole Middle Earth. Such a good llama. Yes you are! I wuv you Bob! Yes I d-"
"Godammit! Shut the hell up you blathering idiot! How the hell am I suppose to join the fellowship?!"
"Well Rivendell is right over there. Let's go speak with Lord Elrond."
"Oh godammit."
END OF CHAPPIE 1!
A/N: Hey y'all! You likey? Reviewy! SC and me are righting this together so you can drop her a message to if you wanna. This is going to be major funny (I hope) so y'all are in for a wild ride. Get ready for invisible catfights, flying llama rides, and much much more!
Just a note: If you want to review, but your not sure how, it's actually very easy. You clicky the purty blue button, typey stuffs in the boxy, and clicky the send button. Yayz!
