Silver: Welcome everyone! I have some wonderful news for you! Julian was fired! We won't ever have to hear from him again! Mike is going to help me write this chapter!

Mike: Yeah! I'm much better than Julian!

Silver: No. Your not. But You'll do.

Mike: *pouts*

Silver: More warning, remember you don't like it, you don't read it. You don't read it, why the f*** would you review it?

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Disclaimer: If I didn't own anything before, why would I now???

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"So, why did he kick you out?" Harry asked Sirius after their laughter died down.

"Because... I was, er, fucking fluffy... " Harry's eye twitched. "Fluffy wasn't always a big dog! She used to be human! You-know-Who put a spell over her and now she's stuck. I've been trying to comfort her, and well one thing led to another and..."

"you cheated on Remus?"

"Yes" he admitted "but I would do anything to get him back right now."

"did you apologize?"

"a couple times. I even told- I even told him I loved him" Harry snorted

"You? You told a guy you love him? God that's funny."

"Why? You tell Ron you love him don't you?"

"Well yeah, but- HOW THE MOTHER FUCKING HELL DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?!" Harry stood up and screamed. Sirius started laughing.

"I didn't!" He was in hysterics and Harry was pissed at himself. It was true, he and Ron had been together for quite sometime now, but not forever. They were...friends with benefits.

"Ok, fine just, uh, well...Don't tell Draco" His words came like a bullet to Sirius.

"Don't...Tell...Draco...?"

"Draco is my boyfriend. I'm his sexy bitch" Siruis twitched.

"You really are just like your father." He said eventually " He was Lucious' sexy bitch, as you so poetically put it. In fact... I don't think you want to hear this now but... Draco is the child of James Potter and Lucious Malfoy. He's your brother Harry."

"Dr-Draco is m-my brother?"

"Yeah, but that's ok! Fred and George fuck each other all the time"

"My child is an INCEST CHILD!?" Harry screamed.

"Child? Oh Harry! Your Pregnant! So is Remus! This is wonderful!"

"NOT ME! MY BROTHER! ICH! THAT SOUNDS WRONG! MY BROTHER IS CARRYING MY CHILD! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Harry fell to the floor. Dumbledore suddenly appeared out of thin air.

"I have an Idea!" he announced in a great booming voice. He raised his wand "JERRYIUS! SPRINGERUS!" In the next moment, Harry, Ron, Draco, Lucious, Snape, Sirius, and Remus were all at the Jerry Springer show. Harry was the only one on stage at the moment.

"Welcome! My guests today say that they're Wizards of the sex world, Please welcome Harry Potter! Harry say's he's fucking his brother and now his brother is pregnant. But his Brother doesn't know that he is his brother! Harry what's going on?"

"What do you mean what's going on?" He said agitated already

"Well, what's the story?"

"You just told everyone the story"

"Yeah but..."

"Jerry, go fuck yourself" Jerry sighed and looked at the ground.

"Ok, let's bring out your brother" Draco walked out onto the stage and sat right on Harry's lap. He wrapped his legs around his waist and began to grind and kiss him. If Harry hadn't stopped him,. They would of soon been fucking each other right there on the stage.

"Geroff!" Harry finally managed to scream, as he pushed Draco to the floor. Draco looked mortally wounded.

"Harry...?" he asked as he stood up and placed his hand on his cheek. Harry bit his hand.

"Draco, there's something I've got to tell you..." Draco frowned a little "You're my brother" Draco sighed deeply

"Is that all? God I thought you were going to tell me you've been cheating on me with the Weasel King"

"First off..." Harry began "It's sickening to fuck your brother, and second I am fucking Ron"

"YOU WHAT?!" Draco lunged at Harry and took a swing, Steve caught his arm and pulled him away by the waist, he was still struggling to get free. Harry was on the ground in a little ball, his glasses had been thrown off and he was weeping uncontrollably.

"How could you possibly want that scrawny, red headed bitch to me?!" Draco yelled and took off his shirt. "Look at This! Why do you need any thing else?!"

"YOU DON'T EVEN CARE THAT I'M YOUR BROTHER?!" Harry yelled back "YOU WANT OUR CHILD TO GROW UP KNOWING THAT HIS PARENTS WERE BROTHERS?! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT YOU SON-OF-A-BITCH!?" Draco stopped yelling and struggling against Steve.

"Well lets bring him out here's Ron!" Ron walked out onto the stage and took a seat. He turned to Harry.

"Harry, God knows the sex was good, but we both knew it wasn't forever and... Well...There is someone else."

"You What? WHO THE FUCK IS IT?!" Harry yelled. Ron mumbled something under his breath. "WHO?!"

"Lucious Malfoy!" He yelled

"WHAT!?!?!?!? YOU BITCH ASS WHORE!" Malfoy took out his wand, Steve wrestled it away from him. "BRING HIM OUT HERE! I WANT TO FACE MY FATHER!"

"I'm already here son." Said a voice from behind him Draco turned to find himself face to face with his father.

"Dad..." Draco said completely caught off guard "You've been fucking a weasley?"

"Not A Weasley. All of them at least once. But Ron was by far the best. And your one to talk. Going and getting yourself impregnated by Harry Potter, what's wrong with you?"

"What wrong with you?!" Harry spoke up "Going and getting yourself impregnated by James Potter?" Draco looked flabbergasted

"YOU WHAT?!" Draco screamed "ARE YOU EVER SEXUALLY SATISFIED?!"

"No, not really. But you should know that son." Draco turned a violent shape of scarlet and he threw up all over the stage. "Oh now, now it wasn't that repulsive. You sure weren't complaining when I pounded you" Draco covered his face and walked off stage. Harry followed him. Draco was crying and Harry was holding him.

"Oh, God..." Draco said "Why did he tell everyone, why?" Harry was holding him very protectively.

"It's O.K. Draco...You didn't ask your father to rape you...shhhhh....it'll be alright..." Harry was saying.

"And We'll be back!" Jerry yelled, and the camera cut to commercials