The Wolf Man vs. Ash

Ash is walking in a remote forest, looking for any deadites.
Ash: They're here somewhere.

As Ash is walking by a tree, a man grabs is leg.
Ash: AH!
Voice: Heeeeeeeelpppp!

Ash picks the man up to see who it is.
Ash: Who are you?
Larry: Talbot. Larry Talbot.
Ash: What are you doing out here, Larry?
Larry: I don't know. I was in my room asleep, and then I wake up here. It's very strange.
Ash: I'll say.
Larry: Please. Take me back to my house. I'll give you food and a bed to sleep in.
Ash: Alright. Will do.

Ash picks up Larry and within minutes, they're back at Larry's house. As Ash carries Larry into the house, a maid runs over and takes Larry up to his room.
Maid: Wait here.
Ash: Okay.

The maid comes down the steps to talk to Ash.
Ash: So. What's wrong with our sleepwalker up there?
Maid: I don't know. This happens every time there is a full moon.
Ash: Full moon, eh.
Maid: Yes. Mr. Talbot goes to bed and in the morning, he wakes up in the forest.
Ash: Does anything else weird happen during a full moon?
Maid: Yes. I person always gets killed.
Ash: Hmmmm. I'll go have a little chat with our sleepwalker upstairs.

Ash walks upstairs into Talbot's room.
Ash: How's it goin', Larry?
Larry: I'm doing well. What's your name?
Ash: Name's Ash. House wares.
Larry: House wares?
Ash: I work at a convenience store called "S-MART."
Larry: Well, Ash, I want to thank you for saving me.
Ash: You're welcome. So, uh, do you know why all the people die when there is a full moon?
Larry: The only thing I do know is that I know the people that get killed.
Ash: Did a wolf bite you anytime in your life?
Larry: Once. A couple of weeks ago.
Ash: You're a werewolf.
Larry: A werewolf?
Ash: Yeah, a werewolf.
Larry: How do you stop a werewolf?
Ash: With a silver bullet.
Larry: A silver bullet?
Ash: Yeah, we're gonna have to wait 'til nightfall to finish this.

It is now nightfall and Larry is getting ready to change into the wolf.
Larry: Are you going to kill me?

Ash puts a silver chain on his chainsaw and silver bullets into his gun.
Ash: Yeah. It's the only way to stop these murders.
Larry: I understand.

Just then, a beam of moonlight hits Talbot. He grows fangs.
Ash: Whoa.

Talbot grows claws.
Ash: Ow.

Talbot grows hair all over his body.
Ash: Groovy.

Talbot is now a fully-grown werewolf.
Ash: Sorry, Larry.

As Ash approaches the Wolf Man; he throws Ash out of the window.
Ash: OH! I'm gonna make this slow and painful!

The Wolf Man jumps out of the window in front of Ash.
Wolf Man: Grrr!
Ash: You are one ugly beast.

Ash rams his chainsaw into the Wolf Man's chest and lifts him into the air.
Ash: This is going to hurt!

Ash pulls the chainsaw out and rams his boomstick into the hole he just made and pulls the trigger, killing the Wolf Man. The Wolf Man goes flying and hits the ground hard. Ash walks up to the corpse.

Ash: No hard feelings.

The Wolf Man slowly turns back into Larry.
Ash: Would you get a load of that!

Ash crosses the Wolf Man's name off of the list and heads through the woods to take on his next opponent.