Chapter Eight: Harry Potter and the Ice-hot Ice Lolly
He hated him - *hated* him! Draco stalked down the corridor, hastily trying to do up the zipper of his trousers. However, he kept meeting with the resistance of his being continually erect.
Who the fuck did Potter think he was? Using Draco like a sex toy - please. Draco scoffed to no one.
But he liked it.
Don't be ridiculous; Malfoys were nobody's sex toy. They were in charge, king of the castle.
Damn it. Why wouldn't the thing go down? Shit - now he'd have to wank. Die Potter die!
**
The next day, Draco sat unusually erect in Transfiguration. Normally he liked this class (even if that twit McGonagall was the professor), but today he couldn't focus. Someone was watching him. He could feel it. Damn it, if Potter.
Draco whipped around, sneering. Granger. Granger was watching him. What was her problem?
Fine. If Granger was going to stare at him, he'd do her one better.
"Granger," Draco called after her as they filed out of class. She turned and peered at him curiously. Draco was suddenly glad that she always stayed after class to prattle on with McGonagall, sending Boy Wonder and the Weasel ahead.
"What do *you* want, Malfoy?" she responded coldly.
"What I *want*, Granger," Draco sneered sarcastically, cornering Hermione in an alcove outside the classroom, "is for you and your cheer gang to take a trip into the fiery pits of doom," he paused for dramatic effect. "But as *that's* unlikely to happen, I'd like to know why the fuck you were making such a study of me in class."
"I wasn't making a study of you, Malfoy," she bit back.
"I'm neither blind nor stupid, Granger. You were staring at me with your beady little Mudblood eyes, and now I feel quite dirty."
Hermione scoffed and gave him an appraising look.
"What?"
"Nothing," Hermione looked away. She seemed to be suppressing a smile.
"Don't 'nothing' me!" Draco shrieked, his voice echoing off the stone walls. He paused a moment. "Jesus fucking Christ," he started angrily. "He told you. He bloody told you!"
Hermione simply arched her eyebrows and smirked.
"Fucking brilliant!" Draco threw his hands up in exasperation. "So, what? What did he tell you?"
She played innocent and shrugged her shoulders.
"Shit," Draco spat and ran his fingers through his hair nervously. He was starting to sweat. (glisten!)
"Well, I'll have you know, Granger, that Potter started it." He nodded vehemently, as if trying to convince himself. "Your little fairy friend is the one who shoved his hand down my trousers and humped me by the bathtub. I had no part in it."
"That's not what he told me," she finally spoke. "From what I understand, you were quite the eager little vixen."
"What?!?!"
"Hmm," she continued, unfazed by his astounded reaction, "he said, and I quote, that it was 'bloody unbelievable.'"
Malfoy thought he would have a heart attack.
"Listen, Malfoy," Hermione tried to sound soothing, "there's nothing wrong with being gay..."
"I'm not gay!" he cut her off, his eyes flashing. "I'm.... I'm..." he struggled to find the term, "demented! Potter pulled a fancy memory trick on me and skewed all my fucking priorities. He's evil - pure unadulterated evil!"
Hermione rolled her eyes. "You're being a bit dramatic. Harry isn't evil; he's just... a bit confused, " she finished delicately. "He's never had these kinds of feelings for a bloke - "
"And you think I have?" Draco seethed. "He... hoodwinked me!"
"Please, Malfoy!" Hermione countered, hands on her hips. "You can't *hoodwink* someone into being gay. You clearly had these feelings for Harry before, and his actions triggered your dormant sexual attraction towards him."
"Excuse me, Granger, but I most certainly did not have... dormant sexual feelings for *Potter*."
"Oh, lay off your righteous indignant act and calm down for a minute," she ordered him. He started at her gaul, but she indicated by a hand gesture that he would suffer a harsh penalty for interrupting her.
"Do please channel the human being I suspect is in there, " she pointed at his chest, "and listen to me. You need to talk to Harry - sans groping. You two clearly have issues that won't be sorted out through angry banter and reciprocal fondling."
"Reciprocal!" he squawked.
"You gave him a hand job!" she cried shrilly.
"Well," he pouted, "it's not like I finished or anything. It doesn't count if they don't come."
"I admire your twisted logic. Face it, Malfoy. You and Harry are involved in some big, sexual... thing," she finished.
"How articulate, Granger."
"Shove off, Malfoy."
"Blow me, Granger!"
"Oooh!" Her eyes lit up suddenly. "Harry could!"
She couldn't be serious.
"I should mention it to him..." she trailed off, clearly making a mental note.
She was serious.
"You're kidding me," he asked rhetorically.
"Nope," she answered. "It's a lovely and effective way to mend bridges. And," she smirked, "every man is negotiable when he's having his dick sucked."
"Ugh, Granger!" Draco drew back in repugnance, his face scrunched up in disgust. "Never, ever utter those words... EVER. That is so wrong coming from you. It'll take weeks to expunge those disgusting images from my head."
She chuckled and he scowled at her. "Well, there's an obvious solution for that." She paused. "Picture Harry doing it instead."
She winked at him and pushed past him to make her way down the hall.
The nerve of her, saying those... shit. Potter sucking him off. Shit, shit, shit. He'd have to wank again.
**
Harry paced back and forth across the small space at the foot of his bed. Hermione sat on his bed, her feet settled on his trunk, as she peered at him expectantly.
How could she. suggest that? What was she thinking?
"Are you mad, Hermione?"
"No, Harry," she answered seriously, "I think it's a really good idea."
"A good idea to. to." he hesitated.
"Blow Draco Malfoy?" Hermione offered, a glint of amusement dancing in her eyes.
Harry narrowed his eyes at her. "I don't even understand why you're so on board with this. You hate Malfoy."
"Yes, but you fancy him. You're my best friend, Harry, I'll support you no matter what."
"It would help me a lot more if you'd simply tell me that I'm crazy and keep me away from him."
"Well," she smirked, "I also find it a tad bit amusing. You and Malfoy, shagging in the loo."
"We weren't shagging!"
"But you could."
Harry chose to ignore this stem of conversation and move on. "Where did this come from, anyway? Yesterday you said I shouldn't worry about Malfoy and today you're suggesting I. I."
"You're an adult, Harry, you can say it."
"Fine! That I give Draco Malfoy a blow job," he threw his hands up in resignation. "Why would you suggest such a thing?"
"Well, when I talked to him earlier, he gave me the idea that - "
Harry interrupted her with a shriek. "What!?!?!?"
"It was no big deal, Harry." She shrugged him off. "But about you and Malfoy. frankly I find it rather hot."
"Hot? Excuse me?"
"Well, two attractive guys making out - every girl's fantasy."
"Oh, God." Harry could feel himself turning a shade of puce.
"Oh, grow up, Harry!" Hermione rolled her eyes and folded her arms across her chest. "You blokes get to fantasize about two women getting together, why shouldn't we women have a little fun?"
"You think that Malfoy and me would be fun? Hermione, that's gross!"
"Not if you do it right."
"Right? I didn't know you could do it wrong!" Harry found that he had to lean against the wall for support; his palms were clammy with sweat.
Well, you could use teeth - that would be wrong."
"TEETH?!?!?!"
"Oh, Harry, do you know nothing about blow jobs?"
"I haven't exactly *had* to before, Hermione!"
"You mean Cho didn't."
"No!"
"Wow. We have a lot of catching up to do, then."
"Catching up? What are we catching up on?"
"You need to know how to give Draco Malfoy a blow job. Which is a problem, because it seems you also need to know how to get one."
"Hermione."
"Don't worry, I don't intend to. demonstrate or anything. Ron would get terribly jealous. He's quite enthusiastic about them, you know."
"No, I wouldn't know, we haven't discussed it."
"Are you sure you're a normal boy?" She peered at him skeptically.
"Yes, I'm normal! I just don't discuss how one of my best friends gets blow jobs from another. That would just be. pervy."
"Well, we're about to break the fourth wall anyway, so let's go for it."
"The fourth wall?"
"Don't ask. Anyway - for starters: no teeth. Ever. Well, that's not true. It can be an erotic addition to the act, but if you're not gentle it can be very unpleasant."
"Uh." Harry simply nodded.
Hermione tilted her head, assessing him. "Harry, why don't you sit down. It might make this easier."
He sat beside her on the bed.
"Where to go from here? There's so much information you should know." Hermione racked her brains. "Okay: for starters you'll want to wrap your hand around the base of the shaft. Then you use your tongue and mouth in various ways, all to simulate sexual intercourse. The key is alternating between applying pressure with your hand and your mouth. Harry! Sit back down!" Hermione pointed emphatically at the mattress and Harry took his seat once more.
"Hermione," Harry lamented, "I do have a... a... one of those; I know what feels nice."
"Quite." She smirked and continued her diatribe. "Honestly, Harry, the rest depends on the individual. Some men like it when you play with their testicles, while others get a kick off deep-throating. But never do anything you're not comfortable with. Mind you, Ron and I have done about everything and - "
"Hermione, stop!"
"Right," she nodded, "maybe you should be practising. You can only take in so much. information."
"Practice? Practice on what?" He looked around frantically.
"On this!" Hermione smiled and gave her wand a quick flick, muttering a spell under her breath. An ice lolly appeared with a pop and she handed it to him. "I wasn't sure of Malfoy's exact, um, measurements, but an ice lolly's a good starter. We can graduate to cucumbers when you're ready."
"Cucumbers? Even Malfoy's not that big, Hermione!"
"Really?" she looked vaguely disappointed. "I had heard rumors, but it's no matter."
"What kind of rumors?"
"Oh, you know - that he's got a bit of a tripod."
Harry rolled his eyes. "You're such a gossip, Hermione. Anyway, he's big, just not *that* big."
Hermione smirked, "So he's *big*, is he? Could you give me an idea in inches?"
"Hermione!"
"What? Just cause I'm a book worm by day doesn't mean I don't enjoy the finer things by night. A girl can be curious, can't she?"
"Not about the boy I'm supposed to shag!"
"We're talking about blow jobs, Harry, not shagging. Though I'm delighted that you've got that in mind."
"You don't get to watch, Hermione."
She pouted. "You're no fun. Anyhow, the ice lolly's going to melt if you don't get started."
Harry let out a great sigh and tentatively pressed his lips to the tip of the ice lolly. It was orange, his favourite flavour. The surface of the ice lolly was frosted with ice and Harry's lips stuck to it. He wet his tongue and ran it from the base of the ice lolly to the tip, once on each side.
Harry looked up. at Hermione was gaping at him with wide eyes.
"What?" he questioned innocently.
"That was. hot, Harry."
"Hot? I really don't think you're allowed to think that I'm hot."
"I don't, Harry. I think that you doing that to an ice lolly is hot. There's a difference."
"Hmmpf," he muttered in protest, though he turned back to his lolly without another word.
Harry slowly but surely worked his mouth over the lolly, slowly sucking just the tip at first and then working his way further down towards the base. It wasn't at all as difficult as Harry had thought it would be, as this was how he normally consumed his ice lollies. Well, when the Dursleys ever actually gave him any.
Hmmm. deep throating. Harry wondered how much of the ice lolly he could take into his mouth without choking. It was quite cold, which stood to impede his progress, but Harry reckoned he could give it a shot. He inched his mouth closer to the bottom of the lolly, releasing the back of his throat to take more in. This wasn't so bad.
"Harry!" Hermione leaned over and began thumping on Harry's back, trying to stop him from choking. "That would be your gag reflex." She smiled at him. "But you're really not all that bad. It's pretty impressive for your first try."
"This is so mortifying," Harry choked, slumping over and hiding his face in his hands.
"It could be worse," Hermione cajoled, "Malfoy could have told everyone that you wanked him off."
"Hermione!" Harry's head shot up and he narrowed his eyes at her. "You're not helping!"
"Sorry," she shrugged and hopped off the bed. "Well, I have to study, and it would do you well to as well."
"I know, Herm, we have an exam in Transfiguration next week."
"I wasn't referring to that, Harry. I think you should practise on more ice lollies," she threw him an impish grin and scampered out the door.
End Chapter Eight
He hated him - *hated* him! Draco stalked down the corridor, hastily trying to do up the zipper of his trousers. However, he kept meeting with the resistance of his being continually erect.
Who the fuck did Potter think he was? Using Draco like a sex toy - please. Draco scoffed to no one.
But he liked it.
Don't be ridiculous; Malfoys were nobody's sex toy. They were in charge, king of the castle.
Damn it. Why wouldn't the thing go down? Shit - now he'd have to wank. Die Potter die!
**
The next day, Draco sat unusually erect in Transfiguration. Normally he liked this class (even if that twit McGonagall was the professor), but today he couldn't focus. Someone was watching him. He could feel it. Damn it, if Potter.
Draco whipped around, sneering. Granger. Granger was watching him. What was her problem?
Fine. If Granger was going to stare at him, he'd do her one better.
"Granger," Draco called after her as they filed out of class. She turned and peered at him curiously. Draco was suddenly glad that she always stayed after class to prattle on with McGonagall, sending Boy Wonder and the Weasel ahead.
"What do *you* want, Malfoy?" she responded coldly.
"What I *want*, Granger," Draco sneered sarcastically, cornering Hermione in an alcove outside the classroom, "is for you and your cheer gang to take a trip into the fiery pits of doom," he paused for dramatic effect. "But as *that's* unlikely to happen, I'd like to know why the fuck you were making such a study of me in class."
"I wasn't making a study of you, Malfoy," she bit back.
"I'm neither blind nor stupid, Granger. You were staring at me with your beady little Mudblood eyes, and now I feel quite dirty."
Hermione scoffed and gave him an appraising look.
"What?"
"Nothing," Hermione looked away. She seemed to be suppressing a smile.
"Don't 'nothing' me!" Draco shrieked, his voice echoing off the stone walls. He paused a moment. "Jesus fucking Christ," he started angrily. "He told you. He bloody told you!"
Hermione simply arched her eyebrows and smirked.
"Fucking brilliant!" Draco threw his hands up in exasperation. "So, what? What did he tell you?"
She played innocent and shrugged her shoulders.
"Shit," Draco spat and ran his fingers through his hair nervously. He was starting to sweat. (glisten!)
"Well, I'll have you know, Granger, that Potter started it." He nodded vehemently, as if trying to convince himself. "Your little fairy friend is the one who shoved his hand down my trousers and humped me by the bathtub. I had no part in it."
"That's not what he told me," she finally spoke. "From what I understand, you were quite the eager little vixen."
"What?!?!"
"Hmm," she continued, unfazed by his astounded reaction, "he said, and I quote, that it was 'bloody unbelievable.'"
Malfoy thought he would have a heart attack.
"Listen, Malfoy," Hermione tried to sound soothing, "there's nothing wrong with being gay..."
"I'm not gay!" he cut her off, his eyes flashing. "I'm.... I'm..." he struggled to find the term, "demented! Potter pulled a fancy memory trick on me and skewed all my fucking priorities. He's evil - pure unadulterated evil!"
Hermione rolled her eyes. "You're being a bit dramatic. Harry isn't evil; he's just... a bit confused, " she finished delicately. "He's never had these kinds of feelings for a bloke - "
"And you think I have?" Draco seethed. "He... hoodwinked me!"
"Please, Malfoy!" Hermione countered, hands on her hips. "You can't *hoodwink* someone into being gay. You clearly had these feelings for Harry before, and his actions triggered your dormant sexual attraction towards him."
"Excuse me, Granger, but I most certainly did not have... dormant sexual feelings for *Potter*."
"Oh, lay off your righteous indignant act and calm down for a minute," she ordered him. He started at her gaul, but she indicated by a hand gesture that he would suffer a harsh penalty for interrupting her.
"Do please channel the human being I suspect is in there, " she pointed at his chest, "and listen to me. You need to talk to Harry - sans groping. You two clearly have issues that won't be sorted out through angry banter and reciprocal fondling."
"Reciprocal!" he squawked.
"You gave him a hand job!" she cried shrilly.
"Well," he pouted, "it's not like I finished or anything. It doesn't count if they don't come."
"I admire your twisted logic. Face it, Malfoy. You and Harry are involved in some big, sexual... thing," she finished.
"How articulate, Granger."
"Shove off, Malfoy."
"Blow me, Granger!"
"Oooh!" Her eyes lit up suddenly. "Harry could!"
She couldn't be serious.
"I should mention it to him..." she trailed off, clearly making a mental note.
She was serious.
"You're kidding me," he asked rhetorically.
"Nope," she answered. "It's a lovely and effective way to mend bridges. And," she smirked, "every man is negotiable when he's having his dick sucked."
"Ugh, Granger!" Draco drew back in repugnance, his face scrunched up in disgust. "Never, ever utter those words... EVER. That is so wrong coming from you. It'll take weeks to expunge those disgusting images from my head."
She chuckled and he scowled at her. "Well, there's an obvious solution for that." She paused. "Picture Harry doing it instead."
She winked at him and pushed past him to make her way down the hall.
The nerve of her, saying those... shit. Potter sucking him off. Shit, shit, shit. He'd have to wank again.
**
Harry paced back and forth across the small space at the foot of his bed. Hermione sat on his bed, her feet settled on his trunk, as she peered at him expectantly.
How could she. suggest that? What was she thinking?
"Are you mad, Hermione?"
"No, Harry," she answered seriously, "I think it's a really good idea."
"A good idea to. to." he hesitated.
"Blow Draco Malfoy?" Hermione offered, a glint of amusement dancing in her eyes.
Harry narrowed his eyes at her. "I don't even understand why you're so on board with this. You hate Malfoy."
"Yes, but you fancy him. You're my best friend, Harry, I'll support you no matter what."
"It would help me a lot more if you'd simply tell me that I'm crazy and keep me away from him."
"Well," she smirked, "I also find it a tad bit amusing. You and Malfoy, shagging in the loo."
"We weren't shagging!"
"But you could."
Harry chose to ignore this stem of conversation and move on. "Where did this come from, anyway? Yesterday you said I shouldn't worry about Malfoy and today you're suggesting I. I."
"You're an adult, Harry, you can say it."
"Fine! That I give Draco Malfoy a blow job," he threw his hands up in resignation. "Why would you suggest such a thing?"
"Well, when I talked to him earlier, he gave me the idea that - "
Harry interrupted her with a shriek. "What!?!?!?"
"It was no big deal, Harry." She shrugged him off. "But about you and Malfoy. frankly I find it rather hot."
"Hot? Excuse me?"
"Well, two attractive guys making out - every girl's fantasy."
"Oh, God." Harry could feel himself turning a shade of puce.
"Oh, grow up, Harry!" Hermione rolled her eyes and folded her arms across her chest. "You blokes get to fantasize about two women getting together, why shouldn't we women have a little fun?"
"You think that Malfoy and me would be fun? Hermione, that's gross!"
"Not if you do it right."
"Right? I didn't know you could do it wrong!" Harry found that he had to lean against the wall for support; his palms were clammy with sweat.
Well, you could use teeth - that would be wrong."
"TEETH?!?!?!"
"Oh, Harry, do you know nothing about blow jobs?"
"I haven't exactly *had* to before, Hermione!"
"You mean Cho didn't."
"No!"
"Wow. We have a lot of catching up to do, then."
"Catching up? What are we catching up on?"
"You need to know how to give Draco Malfoy a blow job. Which is a problem, because it seems you also need to know how to get one."
"Hermione."
"Don't worry, I don't intend to. demonstrate or anything. Ron would get terribly jealous. He's quite enthusiastic about them, you know."
"No, I wouldn't know, we haven't discussed it."
"Are you sure you're a normal boy?" She peered at him skeptically.
"Yes, I'm normal! I just don't discuss how one of my best friends gets blow jobs from another. That would just be. pervy."
"Well, we're about to break the fourth wall anyway, so let's go for it."
"The fourth wall?"
"Don't ask. Anyway - for starters: no teeth. Ever. Well, that's not true. It can be an erotic addition to the act, but if you're not gentle it can be very unpleasant."
"Uh." Harry simply nodded.
Hermione tilted her head, assessing him. "Harry, why don't you sit down. It might make this easier."
He sat beside her on the bed.
"Where to go from here? There's so much information you should know." Hermione racked her brains. "Okay: for starters you'll want to wrap your hand around the base of the shaft. Then you use your tongue and mouth in various ways, all to simulate sexual intercourse. The key is alternating between applying pressure with your hand and your mouth. Harry! Sit back down!" Hermione pointed emphatically at the mattress and Harry took his seat once more.
"Hermione," Harry lamented, "I do have a... a... one of those; I know what feels nice."
"Quite." She smirked and continued her diatribe. "Honestly, Harry, the rest depends on the individual. Some men like it when you play with their testicles, while others get a kick off deep-throating. But never do anything you're not comfortable with. Mind you, Ron and I have done about everything and - "
"Hermione, stop!"
"Right," she nodded, "maybe you should be practising. You can only take in so much. information."
"Practice? Practice on what?" He looked around frantically.
"On this!" Hermione smiled and gave her wand a quick flick, muttering a spell under her breath. An ice lolly appeared with a pop and she handed it to him. "I wasn't sure of Malfoy's exact, um, measurements, but an ice lolly's a good starter. We can graduate to cucumbers when you're ready."
"Cucumbers? Even Malfoy's not that big, Hermione!"
"Really?" she looked vaguely disappointed. "I had heard rumors, but it's no matter."
"What kind of rumors?"
"Oh, you know - that he's got a bit of a tripod."
Harry rolled his eyes. "You're such a gossip, Hermione. Anyway, he's big, just not *that* big."
Hermione smirked, "So he's *big*, is he? Could you give me an idea in inches?"
"Hermione!"
"What? Just cause I'm a book worm by day doesn't mean I don't enjoy the finer things by night. A girl can be curious, can't she?"
"Not about the boy I'm supposed to shag!"
"We're talking about blow jobs, Harry, not shagging. Though I'm delighted that you've got that in mind."
"You don't get to watch, Hermione."
She pouted. "You're no fun. Anyhow, the ice lolly's going to melt if you don't get started."
Harry let out a great sigh and tentatively pressed his lips to the tip of the ice lolly. It was orange, his favourite flavour. The surface of the ice lolly was frosted with ice and Harry's lips stuck to it. He wet his tongue and ran it from the base of the ice lolly to the tip, once on each side.
Harry looked up. at Hermione was gaping at him with wide eyes.
"What?" he questioned innocently.
"That was. hot, Harry."
"Hot? I really don't think you're allowed to think that I'm hot."
"I don't, Harry. I think that you doing that to an ice lolly is hot. There's a difference."
"Hmmpf," he muttered in protest, though he turned back to his lolly without another word.
Harry slowly but surely worked his mouth over the lolly, slowly sucking just the tip at first and then working his way further down towards the base. It wasn't at all as difficult as Harry had thought it would be, as this was how he normally consumed his ice lollies. Well, when the Dursleys ever actually gave him any.
Hmmm. deep throating. Harry wondered how much of the ice lolly he could take into his mouth without choking. It was quite cold, which stood to impede his progress, but Harry reckoned he could give it a shot. He inched his mouth closer to the bottom of the lolly, releasing the back of his throat to take more in. This wasn't so bad.
"Harry!" Hermione leaned over and began thumping on Harry's back, trying to stop him from choking. "That would be your gag reflex." She smiled at him. "But you're really not all that bad. It's pretty impressive for your first try."
"This is so mortifying," Harry choked, slumping over and hiding his face in his hands.
"It could be worse," Hermione cajoled, "Malfoy could have told everyone that you wanked him off."
"Hermione!" Harry's head shot up and he narrowed his eyes at her. "You're not helping!"
"Sorry," she shrugged and hopped off the bed. "Well, I have to study, and it would do you well to as well."
"I know, Herm, we have an exam in Transfiguration next week."
"I wasn't referring to that, Harry. I think you should practise on more ice lollies," she threw him an impish grin and scampered out the door.
End Chapter Eight
