I thought a chapter that was devoted to Pippin would do us all good ;) So here you are!

Quick Notes: Lhachel, did I truly put the word 'okay' in here? Urgh, and I tried so hard to avoid it! Thank you so much for pointing it out!

All reviewers: Your encouragement and advice is so incredibly supporting, you have no idea! Although I write partly for my own enjoyment, I write mostly for you -- I love all your feedback, all of it. I'm extremely greedy when it comes to reviews -- I'll take all I can get! And you all have certainly made all the time put into this and all my writing worthwhile. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you!

And so on we go, jumping right in with Pippin and his terribly confusing thoughts. Neither Pippin nor Diamond have any idea of the ride I'm about to take them on, and I hope you all stick around for it!

-Chapter Six-

Nighttime Wonderings

Pippin lay awake in bed late that night. It was partly because the night was too warm for sleep in his opinion, but mostly because of what was on his mind.

A cool breeze floated in through the parted window, playfully dancing through Pippin's long curls and skimming the surface of his clammy skin. He rolled over in bed, curled one arm beneath his pillow, and threw his covers off with the other. He found his thoughts in most unpleasant territory, and wasn't sure how to get them back out again.

For the first time in his life, he had come to terms with his feelings about Merry and Estella. They were to be wed in the fall, and Pippin was jealous. Merry had managed to find and snag what a lot of hobbits (well, Pippin wasn't entirely sure about this; he supposed he could only say what he) had always wanted; love. Not false, phony, cheated love, the kind that some hobbits based a marriage off of ("We get along just fine, and the fights are few; it is better than nothing") but genuine, true love.

He could see it when he looked into Merry's eyes. He loved her dearly.

Pippin shoved his face into his pillow in frustration. When was it his turn? He had always been the younger cousin, always second to do things, always tagging along. He had always tended to be happy for his elder cousin when he had it well enough. He was happy for him now. But he was also jealous. He wanted what Merry had for once. He was not ashamed to admit that, at least not to himself.

Pippin had to confess that he had given up on it for the time being. He told himself repeatedly that eventually, he may fall for some silly lass somewhere, and they would be wed and he would take over his position of Thain and have little children of his own. Perhaps just as foolish as he was. That thought brought a small grin to his face, as Merry would often chide him and claim that one day his children would either be as foolish as him or wiser, and think little of their old Da.

The grin was gone quickly, however, and his thoughts returned full-paced. Yes, he had given up for the time being. Merry had Estella and Estella had Merry, and Pippin tagged along behind them both, tying up the rear, just struggling to keep up. That was just how it was.

Besides, what lass was interested in his silly feelings? In his thoughts and his mind?

And then today. Pippin frowned thoughtfully, trying to gather his thoughts it some sort of order. He succeeded to some extent.

He wasn't sure of his feelings, and wasn't sure if he ever would be. But earlier that day when Merry and he had run across Prisca and Diamond... it almost seemed like fate, as irrational as it sounded to Pippin to admit it.

And there I go with my foolishness again, he thought bitterly.

But he couldn't help it. The walk had been painfully long, but Pippin thoroughly enjoyed every second of it. Why shouldn't he? The company was pleasant.

More than pleasant, it was desirable.

Diamond looked him in the eye when he spoke. She questioned him; she seemed authentically interested in his life and what he had to say. She asked of their journey with Frodo and Sam.

The quest was a part of him. Diamond seemed to realize this.

He felt drawn to her. He wasn't sure how, but he did. I am foolish, he thought suddenly. For he knew barely anything of this lass, had only just met her today. So she asked him a few questions, talked to him most of the day. It meant nothing.

Yet it did.

He thought bitterly that if he voiced these thoughts to anyone they would deem him has being the silly lad he always was. Thirsty for tales and unwilling to accept reality.  That was how he had been growing up, he knew. But he wasn't a lad, not any longer. His feelings and his thoughts should count for something!

He thought of Merry, asleep in the guest room down the hall, probably dreaming of his Estella. Better yet, she was probably dreaming of him as well from her own bed. Merry and Pippin had left from dinner late, having talked into the night, and upon arriving home had immediately gone to bed. How he wished to have someone to dream of, and to dream of him in return!

Perhaps he would dream of someone tonight, even if the dream wasn't shared. Perhaps he would see her gleaming curls, freckled-strewn face, and her nose wrinkle up delightfully as she giggled, her bright eyes alert and full of curiosity...

Stop it, Peregrin! He scolded himself. Stop lusting after this lass you hardly know.

For it was lust, it had to be. How could he ever think he felt a certain way about someone he didn't even know?

He did know her, though, or so he felt. He felt he knew all about her, and felt a thirst that would only be quenched by being with her. His thoughts abruptly hit a dead-end. He was foolish after all. Nothing would come of this. Love at first sight was hardly viable. In fact, it was downright imprudent!

She had been silent through a lot of the dinner and tea. Still, however, there was something about just being in the same room as this lass, something so enticing and wondrous...

Had anyone noticed his stolen, sidelong glances? They were often enough. He supposed she didn't, at the very least. Heat crept up his neck and tinted his cheeks at the thought of anyone noticing his repeated glimpses of the sweet face that had occupied the room with him for hours he wished would not have ended...

A rash and inexplicable fury suddenly rose in his chest and without warning, he found his legs had seemed to come to life and swung out of his bed all on their own. His feet collided with the chilly floor, and then took him away; out the door, down the hall, and into the guestroom.

Papers were strewn across the chair and desk tucked neatly away in the corner; clothes and other such garments were scattered about recklessly. Moonlight overflowed through the shut window, and the sill before it was littered with useless trinkets. A smile crossed Pippin's face. It seemed Merry had made himself quite at home.

Merry himself was not happy with being awoken. He grumbled and groaned and wrathfully glared at his younger cousin as he pulled himself into a sitting position. Pippin waited as he rubbed his sleep-filled eyes and stretched intentionally, soft moonlight spilling across his tired face and illuminating his curls.

"What is it, Pippin?" Merry hissed at last, locking his eyes in Pippin's. "It had better be good."

"I can't sleep, Merry."

"That's not a good reason, Pip," Merry growled, a glower flickering across his face.

"Perhaps why I cannot sleep is a good reason?" Pippin suggested hopefully.

Merry blinked several times. For a moment, time seemed to have stopped and then started again, this time in reverse. For a moment, Pippin was just a wee lad again so many years before, coming to his older cousin in the middle of night because he had a scary dream or heard a frightening noise. For a moment, they both seemed to be trapped in an illogical time inverse, and Merry felt his heart soften and fill with such love that his cousin would come to him for comfort, of all hobbits. And then it was gone, and they were in their own time, grown lads who happen to be sitting together on a bed in the middle of the night. Merry blinked several times. Though time had seemed to change briefly, his feelings had not. He was reminded of the love he had for Pippin, always had had, and always would have. Of the way he had always longed to comfort him when he was upset. He smiled, yawned involuntarily, and nodded. "Let's hear it, shall we?"

Pippin drew a deep breath, his eyes flickering around the room. He didn't know how to express such vague feelings, and any words that formulated in his mind sounded quite daft. "How was it," he began slowly, at last. "that you felt when you first met Estella?" He knew this would cause Merry to fish far back into the depths of his memory and retrieve the thought from a dusty corner, but he thought perhaps it would shed a bit of light on his current situation.

Merry regarded him curiously. "Annoyed," he responded. "I believe it was because she shoved me out of an apple tree, many years before." His brow furrowed. "You woke me up to ask me this? Could it not have waited until morning? And why do you even wish to know?"

"It could not have waited, since I cannot sleep now, cousin," Pippin said tartly. "I wish to know for my own information." He paused briefly. "Did you feel... connected to her in any way?" He felt amazingly absurd for asking Merry this and felt himself color briefly, but hoped that in the faint light Merry would not notice.

Merry rested his elbows on his knees and looked carefully at Pippin, who sat at the end of the bed regarding Merry in much the same way. "Not that I can think of," he said slowly. "Fatty and I were friends so I saw much of her, and we slowly grew to be friends ourselves. This was a long time ago, remember Pip. We were so very young," Merry paused, a dreamlike expression temporarily flooding his face. "It wasn't until after we returned with Frodo and Sam that we began to realize that it was possibly more than friendship."

"Oh," said Pippin, somewhat putout.

"I have to ask, Peregrin Took," Merry said seriously. "Why you have woken me up in the dead of night to ask me seemingly pointless questions about Estella."

Pippin titled his head slightly to the right and acquired a pensive sort of look. "Do you believe in such a thing as... I don't know, Merry, feeling perhaps drawn to someone?"

A broad grin suddenly appeared on Merry's face. "So that is what this is about!" he declared. Pippin raised his eyebrows and stared at Merry in confusion.

"Diamond!" Merry said for clarification. "You could not keep your eyes off her, Pip, and now you are waking me up to ask about my feelings for Estella. I hope you don't think that it's not obvious."

Pippin opened his mouth furiously, and then shut it again. There was nothing he could say. Merry had said it all.

"So," Merry mused. "Are you planning on going back for a visit?"

"I don't know, Merry!" Pippin said. His head met his hands and he massaged his forehead, letting forth a miserable groan. When he finally looked back up, Merry was surprised at the amount of gravity his cousin's youthful face held. "You may think I'm as foolish as you wish for saying this, Merry, but it's true. I don't know how to explain it well, but I felt... attached to her in some way. Drawn to her. And I felt like she understood, and that she would understand anything I ever tell her. It's such a... different feeling than any I have ever experienced. A pleasant one, one I wish to hold onto."

Merry looked hesitant. "Love?" he questione.

"No!" Pippin said at once. "No, not that. I don't even know her that well, Merry!"

"You don't need to get angry," Merry said softly.

"I'm not. I'm just frustrated, I suppose." Pippin sighed. "That's the foolish part of it all. I barely know her; I don't know her! Yet I feel like this, and I feel like I do know her, in a way. I don't know her favorite season or how she likes to spend her time; I don't know of her past or her hopes for the future; I don't even know if she's promised to another already! Yet I do know her..." he glanced exasperatedly. "Does that make any sense, cousin, any at all?"

Merry nodded. "Yes, it does."

"Does it?" Pippin asked, relief flooding through him. Relief from what he wasn't sure, but it comforted him.

"In ways."

"What ways?" Pippin prodded.

"In ways that I can be sure you are absolutely taken with this lass, and that I insist you go back to see her," Merry said matter-of-factly.

Pippin slumped. "Yes, I suppose," he murmured. He supposed he should feel better about this whole situation somehow... yet he felt oddly disappointed. What else had he been looking for?

"It's all so unbelievable," Merry said with a mock sigh. Pippin glanced up.

"What is?"

"My little cousin is getting older with every passing day. Where does the time go?" Merry heaved an overdramatic sigh and pulled forward to engulf his cousin in a warm hug. Pippin returned it at first, and then scowled and pulled back.

"I'm hardly little," he retorted. "And besides, you are not one to talk, with Estella and such. You aren't that much older than me. Only a few years."

"A few years?" Merry laughed. "Think what you wish, little cousin." He emphasized the 'little'. "Now, get out Pip, and let me get back to sleep. You get yourself back to your own room and let yourself sleep. You have nothing to worry about." A yawn followed by another overtook him and he felt his eyelids droop, heavy with drowsiness.

Pippin nodded and stood. "You're right, Merry, thank you."
Merry grinned. "We much older folk know best," he teased.

"And are laid to rest first," Pippin retorted sourly. Merry moved to throw his pillow at him, but by the time he had actually pitched it towards Pippin, the door was closed and Pippin was gone; the pillow bounced harmlessly off the door and to the floor. Merry shook his head and went to retrieve it.

"Cousins," he murmured beneath his breath. "They're good for nothing except waking you up in the middle of the night to ask trivial questions about trivial manners." He smiled slightly as he laid his head upon his pillow. He wouldn't have it any other way.

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We are just beginning to graze the tip of the iceberg! Poor Pippin has no idea what he's getting himself into. You guys saw how much reviews mean to me at the beginning of the chapter, so please! Review! Thank you!

(Another quick note: If any of you have been reading 'Distance to the Stars', then maybe you've noticed a bit of a similarity between the second chapter of it, involving Fatty and Estella, and this one. Seems I can't stay away from these nighttime visits! They're just too much fun to write.)