I don't own any parts of Love Hina

===

Kitsune: Where are you going? Where are you going? I know it's taken me awhile to find Naru's video, but here it is!

She holds up a video where the words 'Essence of the Forbidden' is scribbled along the front. She pops it into the cassette player and holds her breath.

===

Location: Secret Base, AKA Tea House

Haruka stares at the group who appears to be in a heated discussion. She wouldn't have minded, except Motoko brought out her blade at that moment and was glowing in anger as Su took out one of her many bazookas and aimed it at Keitaro. Obviously, her nephew had said another stupid thing and was getting himself into deeper and deeper shit, but this was scaring away her business.

On the other end of the tea house, Naru watches with a sense of glee as the first shot of Su's weapon hits Keitaro in the nuts--that is until she feels a cold shiver run up her body, as if she knew that Kitsune would show movies of her next. She had to stop this and stop it quickly.

"Everyone!" she screams at the top of her lungs.

No one looks at her.

"GUYS!"

Still, Motoko and Su are occupied with trying to damage Keitaro, Sarah is cheering them on, and Shinobu is standing over Mutsumi who looks--wait--DEAD????

"HEY!"

Haruka's voice brakes over the racket and almost instantly, they settle down and look at her. Even Mutsumi's soul, which had been on the verge of floating away, stops in mid flight and turns to look at the elder woman.

"Do that shit somewhere else." With those words of wisdom, Haruka strolls back to the other end of the tea house.

"She's right," Naru says as soon as Haruka leaves. "We have to get those videos out of Kitsune's collection. We have to stop it now!"

"You're just saying that because you don't want the world to see you and that sock puppet," Keitaro murmurs from the ground.

"I was just pretending to make out with it! You know, practicing!" Naru defends herself.

"IT GOT TO THIRD BASE!" As soon as Keitaro finishes that sentence, he knows that he is dead. "Oh, crap," he groans as Naru flies at him.

===

After a few blurry lines, the video flashes on the screen then explodes.

Kitsune: What the hell? What happened?

She ejects the tape and peers at the label. A small frown mars her face as she glances at the small crowed.

Kitsune: It says rated R, and I forgot this was a PG-13 viewing. . . Maybe I should find another tape. Give me a moment.

Kitsune scrambles out of the room, but while she's gone, one of the more horny watchers grabs the tape and sticks it back into the video tape player.

=Essence of the Forbidden=

Naru stood in the middle of her room as she contemplated her relationship with Seta. She had loved him for the longest time and the day before, she had asked him out on a date with a lot of pressure from Kitsune.

Kitsune sat on the edge of Naru's bed, a cup of sake in her hands and her eyes staring smartly at the younger girl. "Big date tonight, right?"

Naru blushed. She had already grabbed a brush and ran it through her long hair, making herself look as nice as possible. "Yes," Naru murmured.

"Giving it up tonight too?"

Naru turned, her face turning red as she hurled the brush at Kitsune. Kitsune ducked out of the way as she laughed. "I meant are you going to let him KISS you tonight!"

"Well--I--nev--"

"Ah, so you've never had a kiss before, have you?"

"No."

Kitsune looked at the direction of the camera she had implanted and winked at it. She then stood up abruptly and said, "Hold on. I've got an idea."

She rushed out of the room while Naru pulled out some clothes to wear. She began to change, pulling off her shirt, when Kitsune rushed back into the room with a little sock over her hands. She shoved it in front of Naru's face and said, "This is Rei. You can practice kissing with it!"

Naru made a disgusted face and pushed away the sock. "Kiss a sock? Are you serious?" Naru continued to get dressed.

"Of course I am. I mean," Kitsune tried to think quickly. "Wouldn't it be embarrassing if it's a cool night, your hair's stirring as the sun's setting and Seta is standing at your side. Suddenly, he glances down at you, leans over and his lips touches yours--then he pulls back because you're such a horrible kisser and he never sees you EVER again!"

Naru's face became pale.

Kitsune dropped the sock puppet onto Naru's bed and backed out of the room. "I'll just leave that there and if you feel that you need to practice, feel free to use it."

Kitsune closed the door behind her, leaving Naru and the sock puppet alone.

Naru glanced at the sock puppet, then away. She repeats that maneuver several times before she drops on her knees and puts the sock puppet over her hand.

"Okay, Rei, I'm just practicing--this really isn't a first kiss--so…"

Naru shut her eyes and leaned in closer until her lips touched the furry sock puppets "mouth."

Within minutes, she was giving the small object butterfly kisses. Her tongue delved into the oriface, Frenching it. Suddenly, she dropped down in her bed with the sock puppet above her, it caressing her shoulder and slowly sliding down until--

===

Kitsune runs back in and hit's the stop button.

Kitsune: If we want to keep this at PG-13, we stop there! So, who wants to buy this?

Kitsune: Well, there's still three more tapes to view: Keitaro, Mutsumi, and Su's…actually I want to show you Su's at the end, as a finally. So, pick between Keitaro and Mutsumi for now.