A/N: I am extremely sorry for this long gap of time between chapters 3 and
4, but I do appreciate the readers that wait around for the next chapter. I
also apologize for it being a little shorter, it's just that school started
and things have been a little hectic. I finally got settled into things so
I found some free time. Hope you guys like Chapter 4. Oh and thank you so
much for all the amazing reviews!!! A special thanks to Arianna555 for
calling my writing "so...Gilmore" that's just about the best compliment
ever. It's what I was going for! Thank you! This chapter has some serious
Rory Jess discussion, that's basically all it is, but I think you will like
it. Has a lot of emotion to it. Like I said, this is more drama, not so
much romance.
Disclaimer: Same as always, don't own a thing.
Previously:
Jess saw hurt in her eyes and she just kept staring. What in the world was wrong with her? "Rory...? You okay? You look like your ready to throw up or- " Rory interrupted his words.
"Not graduating?" She was so hurt that her words came out as a small whisper.
Although barely audible, her words hit Jess and he gasped, barely able to breath. His muscles tensed and his stomach churned. He scrambled his brain for words, but all didn't seem right. He had no choice though, she needed an explanation. Tears of failure stung the back of his eyes, but he held them back. No more stalling, it was now or never.
Chapter 4: The Right Words
"JESS! Care to explain yourself? What the hell did Lane mean by not graduating?" Rory was infuriated and was holding herself back from blowing up because she needed to know the truth from him first.
Jess had been sitting there, coming up with nothing to say for several minutes. Nothing seemed right. He couldn't put his emotions into words. They just kept coming up as tears and they were building up in his eyes ready to rush down his cheeks. However, there was no way that Jess could be that open, even in front of Rory.
"Dammit Jess! Why can't you ever just talk! I can't take it anymore, you can never talk to me or tell me what your feeling and I never know what the hell is wrong with you when you walk around sulking. I don't ever know if it's me your mad at or if it's Luke or school. You know, I am here to help you. You just have to talk." Rory waited to see if her words got through to him, but he didn't even look at her. "But I guess that's not going to happen. I'm leaving. Call me or not, whatever. Because you want to know something Jess? I don't care anymore."
And with those hurtful words, Jess watched Rory open the front door to Luke's walk out and shut the door behind her. The slamming was his cue to start letting it all out, no one was around to see. His eyes were flooded with tears which soon soaked his face. So Jess sat there with his head in his hands and thought to himself:
'So that's two people I closed off today. First Luke when he asked me what was wrong and now Rory. I need to stop doing this. I can't push them all way, especially Rory. '
Jess couldn't let Rory slip through his hands like that. He had to admit it to himself that he loved her. There was no doubt about that. The words that came out of her mouth normally wouldn't even penetrate his skin, but from her it was like a bullet breaking the skin and puncturing his heart, breaking it. He quickly wiped the salted water from his face and stood on his feet to confront her and finally open up, something he had never done before, something that he needed to do.
*********************************
Rory couldn't believe her own words. How could she say such harsh words to him? Of course she still cared, she had to care because she loved him. In a way she was just as stubborn as him for not telling him how much she loved him. She was on the verge of tears as she hurriedly tried to make it back home. She was just about to walk past the gazebo. She just had to put on some Coldplay and lay down for a while. That always soothed her. Rory was already starting to relax at the thought, but she immediately tensed when she felt a familiar hand grab her shoulder and stop her in her tracks. She looked down at the grass beneath her feet and nervously spoke.
"What do you want?" Rory didn't dare turn around. She couldn't look into his lying eyes.
"I...I was going to tell you." Jess thought to himself 'Idiot! Was that the best you could come up with!?'
Rory remained silent and folded her arms closing him off. She felt that she wasn't the one that had to talk. He couldn't just say a few words and it be all over with like usual. This time he hurt her deeply. This wasn't a stupid black eye or even Dean. This was him lying to her.
Jess knew that he was the one that had to do the talking. He couldn't blame her, "Listen, I...I failed most of my classes and I'm not graduating. I can't get prom tickets. I'm sorry, I can't take you to prom." Jess fidgeted with the back of his head and then shoved his hands in his pockets still waiting for her response. He watched her let her arms unfold and slowly turn around.
"I can't believe this." Rory shook her head, still avoiding his eyes.
"I know Rory, I know you wanted to go to prom, and I feel like shit for not being able to take you."
"No, I can't believe this. As in I can't believe that you think I am that shallow!"
Jess stood there bewildered at what she just said. Could he ever say anything right with this girl? "What?" he said, dumbfounded.
"Do you really think I am mad because you can't take me to prom? You think I care more about going to some stupid party where people that don't know how to dance prance around like idiots in cheesy prom dresses? Jess, I care about you! I'm upset because you hid this from me, that you couldn't just talk to me and ask for help. And you failing? What the hell is wrong with that school? You are a genius, you read more books than any of those kids will read in a lifetime and-"
"I wasn't going to class. I missed too many days and I can't make them up. That's why I failed." He averted his eyes from hers, he couldn't bare to see the disappointment flood them.
Rory rubbed her forehead and closed her eyes. Why would he do something so stupid? "Jess, remember that night I tutored you at Luke's?"
"The night of the car crash, yeah" He wasn't sure what she was leading to.
"And remember what I said to you that night in the car after we got ice cream?"
"No, I tried to erase that night from my memory. It didn't hold many of my shining moments."
"Yeah well that's evident, but what I am getting at is that I said that you could do so much more. And there are still no pom poms." She put on a smile. She didn't want to talk down to him, she wanted to be there for him so she wasn't going to yell at him. She wanted to make him smile. He lifted his head and he had a smirk across his face. "You can do so much more than not graduating high school. I know what your capable of."
"Well I'm glad you have so much faith in me, but your naivety is too cute."
"Don't give me that 'Oh I'm a troubled teen and I wont amount to anything' act. You can if you just get your act together and maybe, if a miracle decides to occur, ask for help. Hey, if the gods are on my side maybe you'll even talk to me about how you feel. "
His smirk faded from his face. Jess had to control himself. She always tried to give him this speech and it angered him every time. He thought she could understand what he was thinking and that he wasn't who she thought he was. "Whatever, I don't want to talk about it." He spoke in a stern voice hoping she would drop it, but Rory never just dropped anything.
"And there's your famous line-"
"RORY! What the hell do you want from me!" Jess had to let his anger out. He knew it was wrong to yell at Rory. It was like he was watching himself acting like an idiot yet he couldn't stop himself. He proceeded to yell as he gained the attention of the entire town. "I said sorry, I told you about school and the prom yet you're still standing there interrogating me. What do you want me to say? You want me to tell you that I'm a failure and screwed up my life! That I want to leave this hell hole or even possibly just end my life since it's nothing but shit anyway! The only reason I'm still here is because I love you too God damn much! Is that what you want to hear, are you happy with that?" By now, Jess was crying his heart out. He wasn't planning on an answer from her so he brought his hands to his face as he inhaled deeply and turned around. He couldn't feel his legs anymore so he brought himself down on his knees and sat Indian style as he let his hands drop to his lap. Jess looked at his tears that lay in the palm of his hands and realized just how much he had bottled up.
Rory stepped forward and kneeled behind him and whispered in his ear, "Yes, that's exactly what I wanted, you told me how you feel." Still kneeling behind him she placed her arms around his neck and let them hang in front of his chest. Her head rested next to his on his shoulder. She turned her head to the left and kissed his cheek and then wiped away the slowly falling tears.
Jess was blown away by the angel that was kneeled behind him. He had never felt what it was like to have someone love him, but he was pretty sure this was the feeling. He lifted his hands from his lap and grabbed onto both her hands. Jess brought both of them to his lips and kissed them. He knew that now he could never leave her. He had wanted to run and start a different life somewhere faraway, but there was no need to leave. The next chapter to his life was right here with Rory.
Rory slowly pulled away and stood up. She walked in front of him and held out her hand to help him up. In a way she wasn't just helping him up from the floor but helping him out of the hole he had been sitting in for the past few months. The one he had dug himself into and closed himself off from the world in.
He stood up and looked into his life saver's eyes. He cupped her cheeks and traced her jaw line with his thumb. Jess tilted his head slightly and kissed her supple lips and pulled her in closer. He pulled his lips away from hers, wrapped his arms around her and hugged her. "Thank you." Those two words sounded so simple to him, but it was the only thing he could tell her. There was no other way to put it.
Rory loosened from his embrace and stepped back, her arms still resting on his shoulders, "You're welcome and if you haven't figured it out by now, I love you too." The sound of his small chuckle filled Rory's heart with pure bliss. "So how about some coffee?"
Jess laughed, she never forgot about her coffee, "Aww..I love my little caffeine addict."
"Damn straight." The both of them laughed and as soon as they realized that the whole town was still watching and they noticed Miss. Patty was making her way to them, they started walking as fast as they could to Luke's. They were going to have a lot of explaining to do, just not now. The both of them just wanted the day to themselves. Rory wanted to enjoy the fact that she was the only one he could open up to and Jess wanted time to take on this new feeling called love.
A/N: So, good or bad? Please review! This is, I think, the most important chapter yet and I need to know whether it was done correctly. I have several I ideas up in the air of what comes up next, but I am still thinking about it. So if anyone has anything, and I mean ANYTHING, on their mind about what they would like to see happen, please don't be shy! It will definitely bring the next chapter a lot quicker. I welcome anyone that would like to help me out because I'm a little unsure. REVIEW!!!!!!
Disclaimer: Same as always, don't own a thing.
Previously:
Jess saw hurt in her eyes and she just kept staring. What in the world was wrong with her? "Rory...? You okay? You look like your ready to throw up or- " Rory interrupted his words.
"Not graduating?" She was so hurt that her words came out as a small whisper.
Although barely audible, her words hit Jess and he gasped, barely able to breath. His muscles tensed and his stomach churned. He scrambled his brain for words, but all didn't seem right. He had no choice though, she needed an explanation. Tears of failure stung the back of his eyes, but he held them back. No more stalling, it was now or never.
Chapter 4: The Right Words
"JESS! Care to explain yourself? What the hell did Lane mean by not graduating?" Rory was infuriated and was holding herself back from blowing up because she needed to know the truth from him first.
Jess had been sitting there, coming up with nothing to say for several minutes. Nothing seemed right. He couldn't put his emotions into words. They just kept coming up as tears and they were building up in his eyes ready to rush down his cheeks. However, there was no way that Jess could be that open, even in front of Rory.
"Dammit Jess! Why can't you ever just talk! I can't take it anymore, you can never talk to me or tell me what your feeling and I never know what the hell is wrong with you when you walk around sulking. I don't ever know if it's me your mad at or if it's Luke or school. You know, I am here to help you. You just have to talk." Rory waited to see if her words got through to him, but he didn't even look at her. "But I guess that's not going to happen. I'm leaving. Call me or not, whatever. Because you want to know something Jess? I don't care anymore."
And with those hurtful words, Jess watched Rory open the front door to Luke's walk out and shut the door behind her. The slamming was his cue to start letting it all out, no one was around to see. His eyes were flooded with tears which soon soaked his face. So Jess sat there with his head in his hands and thought to himself:
'So that's two people I closed off today. First Luke when he asked me what was wrong and now Rory. I need to stop doing this. I can't push them all way, especially Rory. '
Jess couldn't let Rory slip through his hands like that. He had to admit it to himself that he loved her. There was no doubt about that. The words that came out of her mouth normally wouldn't even penetrate his skin, but from her it was like a bullet breaking the skin and puncturing his heart, breaking it. He quickly wiped the salted water from his face and stood on his feet to confront her and finally open up, something he had never done before, something that he needed to do.
*********************************
Rory couldn't believe her own words. How could she say such harsh words to him? Of course she still cared, she had to care because she loved him. In a way she was just as stubborn as him for not telling him how much she loved him. She was on the verge of tears as she hurriedly tried to make it back home. She was just about to walk past the gazebo. She just had to put on some Coldplay and lay down for a while. That always soothed her. Rory was already starting to relax at the thought, but she immediately tensed when she felt a familiar hand grab her shoulder and stop her in her tracks. She looked down at the grass beneath her feet and nervously spoke.
"What do you want?" Rory didn't dare turn around. She couldn't look into his lying eyes.
"I...I was going to tell you." Jess thought to himself 'Idiot! Was that the best you could come up with!?'
Rory remained silent and folded her arms closing him off. She felt that she wasn't the one that had to talk. He couldn't just say a few words and it be all over with like usual. This time he hurt her deeply. This wasn't a stupid black eye or even Dean. This was him lying to her.
Jess knew that he was the one that had to do the talking. He couldn't blame her, "Listen, I...I failed most of my classes and I'm not graduating. I can't get prom tickets. I'm sorry, I can't take you to prom." Jess fidgeted with the back of his head and then shoved his hands in his pockets still waiting for her response. He watched her let her arms unfold and slowly turn around.
"I can't believe this." Rory shook her head, still avoiding his eyes.
"I know Rory, I know you wanted to go to prom, and I feel like shit for not being able to take you."
"No, I can't believe this. As in I can't believe that you think I am that shallow!"
Jess stood there bewildered at what she just said. Could he ever say anything right with this girl? "What?" he said, dumbfounded.
"Do you really think I am mad because you can't take me to prom? You think I care more about going to some stupid party where people that don't know how to dance prance around like idiots in cheesy prom dresses? Jess, I care about you! I'm upset because you hid this from me, that you couldn't just talk to me and ask for help. And you failing? What the hell is wrong with that school? You are a genius, you read more books than any of those kids will read in a lifetime and-"
"I wasn't going to class. I missed too many days and I can't make them up. That's why I failed." He averted his eyes from hers, he couldn't bare to see the disappointment flood them.
Rory rubbed her forehead and closed her eyes. Why would he do something so stupid? "Jess, remember that night I tutored you at Luke's?"
"The night of the car crash, yeah" He wasn't sure what she was leading to.
"And remember what I said to you that night in the car after we got ice cream?"
"No, I tried to erase that night from my memory. It didn't hold many of my shining moments."
"Yeah well that's evident, but what I am getting at is that I said that you could do so much more. And there are still no pom poms." She put on a smile. She didn't want to talk down to him, she wanted to be there for him so she wasn't going to yell at him. She wanted to make him smile. He lifted his head and he had a smirk across his face. "You can do so much more than not graduating high school. I know what your capable of."
"Well I'm glad you have so much faith in me, but your naivety is too cute."
"Don't give me that 'Oh I'm a troubled teen and I wont amount to anything' act. You can if you just get your act together and maybe, if a miracle decides to occur, ask for help. Hey, if the gods are on my side maybe you'll even talk to me about how you feel. "
His smirk faded from his face. Jess had to control himself. She always tried to give him this speech and it angered him every time. He thought she could understand what he was thinking and that he wasn't who she thought he was. "Whatever, I don't want to talk about it." He spoke in a stern voice hoping she would drop it, but Rory never just dropped anything.
"And there's your famous line-"
"RORY! What the hell do you want from me!" Jess had to let his anger out. He knew it was wrong to yell at Rory. It was like he was watching himself acting like an idiot yet he couldn't stop himself. He proceeded to yell as he gained the attention of the entire town. "I said sorry, I told you about school and the prom yet you're still standing there interrogating me. What do you want me to say? You want me to tell you that I'm a failure and screwed up my life! That I want to leave this hell hole or even possibly just end my life since it's nothing but shit anyway! The only reason I'm still here is because I love you too God damn much! Is that what you want to hear, are you happy with that?" By now, Jess was crying his heart out. He wasn't planning on an answer from her so he brought his hands to his face as he inhaled deeply and turned around. He couldn't feel his legs anymore so he brought himself down on his knees and sat Indian style as he let his hands drop to his lap. Jess looked at his tears that lay in the palm of his hands and realized just how much he had bottled up.
Rory stepped forward and kneeled behind him and whispered in his ear, "Yes, that's exactly what I wanted, you told me how you feel." Still kneeling behind him she placed her arms around his neck and let them hang in front of his chest. Her head rested next to his on his shoulder. She turned her head to the left and kissed his cheek and then wiped away the slowly falling tears.
Jess was blown away by the angel that was kneeled behind him. He had never felt what it was like to have someone love him, but he was pretty sure this was the feeling. He lifted his hands from his lap and grabbed onto both her hands. Jess brought both of them to his lips and kissed them. He knew that now he could never leave her. He had wanted to run and start a different life somewhere faraway, but there was no need to leave. The next chapter to his life was right here with Rory.
Rory slowly pulled away and stood up. She walked in front of him and held out her hand to help him up. In a way she wasn't just helping him up from the floor but helping him out of the hole he had been sitting in for the past few months. The one he had dug himself into and closed himself off from the world in.
He stood up and looked into his life saver's eyes. He cupped her cheeks and traced her jaw line with his thumb. Jess tilted his head slightly and kissed her supple lips and pulled her in closer. He pulled his lips away from hers, wrapped his arms around her and hugged her. "Thank you." Those two words sounded so simple to him, but it was the only thing he could tell her. There was no other way to put it.
Rory loosened from his embrace and stepped back, her arms still resting on his shoulders, "You're welcome and if you haven't figured it out by now, I love you too." The sound of his small chuckle filled Rory's heart with pure bliss. "So how about some coffee?"
Jess laughed, she never forgot about her coffee, "Aww..I love my little caffeine addict."
"Damn straight." The both of them laughed and as soon as they realized that the whole town was still watching and they noticed Miss. Patty was making her way to them, they started walking as fast as they could to Luke's. They were going to have a lot of explaining to do, just not now. The both of them just wanted the day to themselves. Rory wanted to enjoy the fact that she was the only one he could open up to and Jess wanted time to take on this new feeling called love.
A/N: So, good or bad? Please review! This is, I think, the most important chapter yet and I need to know whether it was done correctly. I have several I ideas up in the air of what comes up next, but I am still thinking about it. So if anyone has anything, and I mean ANYTHING, on their mind about what they would like to see happen, please don't be shy! It will definitely bring the next chapter a lot quicker. I welcome anyone that would like to help me out because I'm a little unsure. REVIEW!!!!!!
