Chapter 2: "Caution: Slow person crossing."Disclaimer: Don't own anything,
cept for the plot. The OOCness is from Bahamut. Beware the Mega Flare.
Trish taught Dante about everything he needed about tying your shoes, why demons never need food, how to fend off strange, demented perverts that might be your brother, Alastor Ifrit Sparda: Getting to talk to your weapons that you have met before, but not in weaponform exept for Ifrit.
She reminded him to take meds constantly (when he is told.) She then went off somwhere on the isle, singing "Dante, I shall find you a vaccine for stupidity."
Dante's short attention span got the better of him. He saw the blue orb, and he now was constantly trying to get it. It went like this:
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."...
2 hours of bouncing later...
A death schythe pops out of the catle. He shouts to Dante, !!!!!!!!!"ARE YOU F***ING RETARDED, OR ARE YOU JUST CHOOSING TO IGNORE THE
ESCALAtOR
30 FEET AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Trish, who heard this, thought, "Probably both." The etheral being became furious as Dante looked at a bluejay the entire time.
He then used the escalator and threw the blue orb straight at the back of his head. Dante said, "Thanks mister mad ghost!" and walked through the door. He decided that he would look for summore orbs to add to his collection. He saw a stairwell with huge increments of red orbs on them. He also noticed a statue with a very sharp spear. He collected a red orb, then decided to stare at the counter for a while as it went up. He stared at it till he was at the platform with the spear, then fell right on to it, grabbed the spear, do a perfect rodeo 720, and was showered with red orbs, gining him a grand total of 100 red orbs. He then said, "I can buy a new dinette pizza set! Awesome."
He then went to the door and it took 45 red orbs from him. He banged on the door, did a flip kick, then his eyes glowed red. He then said," Better down some meds. Light ones, for now." He then got out a Hi-C mixed with pot, drank it all up, then got an evil glint in his eye. " Prepare to eat my lead!"He whipped out the REAL Ebony and Ivory, then hit the door with 80 clips from the guns. After all that, only a tiny piece of wood is all that's left, and the meds wear off.
R&R. You know you want to.
Trish taught Dante about everything he needed about tying your shoes, why demons never need food, how to fend off strange, demented perverts that might be your brother, Alastor Ifrit Sparda: Getting to talk to your weapons that you have met before, but not in weaponform exept for Ifrit.
She reminded him to take meds constantly (when he is told.) She then went off somwhere on the isle, singing "Dante, I shall find you a vaccine for stupidity."
Dante's short attention span got the better of him. He saw the blue orb, and he now was constantly trying to get it. It went like this:
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."
Bounce."Just missed it."...
2 hours of bouncing later...
A death schythe pops out of the catle. He shouts to Dante, !!!!!!!!!"ARE YOU F***ING RETARDED, OR ARE YOU JUST CHOOSING TO IGNORE THE
ESCALAtOR
30 FEET AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Trish, who heard this, thought, "Probably both." The etheral being became furious as Dante looked at a bluejay the entire time.
He then used the escalator and threw the blue orb straight at the back of his head. Dante said, "Thanks mister mad ghost!" and walked through the door. He decided that he would look for summore orbs to add to his collection. He saw a stairwell with huge increments of red orbs on them. He also noticed a statue with a very sharp spear. He collected a red orb, then decided to stare at the counter for a while as it went up. He stared at it till he was at the platform with the spear, then fell right on to it, grabbed the spear, do a perfect rodeo 720, and was showered with red orbs, gining him a grand total of 100 red orbs. He then said, "I can buy a new dinette pizza set! Awesome."
He then went to the door and it took 45 red orbs from him. He banged on the door, did a flip kick, then his eyes glowed red. He then said," Better down some meds. Light ones, for now." He then got out a Hi-C mixed with pot, drank it all up, then got an evil glint in his eye. " Prepare to eat my lead!"He whipped out the REAL Ebony and Ivory, then hit the door with 80 clips from the guns. After all that, only a tiny piece of wood is all that's left, and the meds wear off.
R&R. You know you want to.
