Chapter Four
AN: I know, short chapters but at least I update a lot right?
The instant Ellie walks into Doctor James' office a week later she immediately launches into the rest of her story. Obviously wanting to get in and get it over with.
Where was I last week. Right, the day I made my stupid mistake. My entire life I had based on telling no lies, a moral my father planted in my head from a young age, granted as I got older a did start my lying by omission to protect myself. But I had honestly never lied to anyone, when I was covering for Marco it was him who was doing all the direct lying. So I should have known that the instant I started lying the basis of my entire world would fall out. And it did, it started crumbling that day.
I rushed around all day looking for Sean, but unfortunately Sean and I didn't have any classes together and I really didn't get a chance to see him. But long before lunch I heard the rumors going around that Sean and I were dating and people kept coming up to me all day asking for verification, but when I would commit to anything everyone figured I was just being my usual loner self.
Sean found me first that day at lunch and his expression was totally apologetic. He stated right away that he had nothing to do with the rumor and he didn't know how they got started, he just stated that someone must have seen them outside the community center on Saturday. I had to tell him, so I explained everything to him, about how I had basically let Paige believe that we were dating. That's when he stated that we needed to talk and dragged me out of the cafeteria away from all of the eyes that had been focused on us.
Ellie falls silent then, takes a deep breath and then continues. Not talking so much about actually events but about her thoughts, something that Doctor James' rarely got out of her, even after a year of working with her.
I hated that feeling, of everyone watching me. I was always so busy hiding secrets that I hated when any attention fell on me, afraid that everyone would be able to see through all of the walls I had put up around myself. This was way to much for me to cope with, if I had known before I spoke to Paige just how much the possibility of my having a boyfriend would stir up my entire grade I never would have said anything. It probably would have been better for me to have people whispering behind my back then to have them straight out staring at me...maybe things wouldn't have gotten so out of control. And Sean wouldn't be in jail right now...
An orderly bursting into the room stops Ellie from going any further, "I'm sorry Doctor James' I know you have a session but we have a code red on the second floor."
"Ellie, dear, I'm so sorry to cut this short, I know we were getting somewhere today. But I want to reschedule for tomorrow."
Ellie shakes her head, "our normal time will be all right."
"You're sure?"
Ellie nods, "I'm sure."
AN: I know, short chapters but at least I update a lot right?
The instant Ellie walks into Doctor James' office a week later she immediately launches into the rest of her story. Obviously wanting to get in and get it over with.
Where was I last week. Right, the day I made my stupid mistake. My entire life I had based on telling no lies, a moral my father planted in my head from a young age, granted as I got older a did start my lying by omission to protect myself. But I had honestly never lied to anyone, when I was covering for Marco it was him who was doing all the direct lying. So I should have known that the instant I started lying the basis of my entire world would fall out. And it did, it started crumbling that day.
I rushed around all day looking for Sean, but unfortunately Sean and I didn't have any classes together and I really didn't get a chance to see him. But long before lunch I heard the rumors going around that Sean and I were dating and people kept coming up to me all day asking for verification, but when I would commit to anything everyone figured I was just being my usual loner self.
Sean found me first that day at lunch and his expression was totally apologetic. He stated right away that he had nothing to do with the rumor and he didn't know how they got started, he just stated that someone must have seen them outside the community center on Saturday. I had to tell him, so I explained everything to him, about how I had basically let Paige believe that we were dating. That's when he stated that we needed to talk and dragged me out of the cafeteria away from all of the eyes that had been focused on us.
Ellie falls silent then, takes a deep breath and then continues. Not talking so much about actually events but about her thoughts, something that Doctor James' rarely got out of her, even after a year of working with her.
I hated that feeling, of everyone watching me. I was always so busy hiding secrets that I hated when any attention fell on me, afraid that everyone would be able to see through all of the walls I had put up around myself. This was way to much for me to cope with, if I had known before I spoke to Paige just how much the possibility of my having a boyfriend would stir up my entire grade I never would have said anything. It probably would have been better for me to have people whispering behind my back then to have them straight out staring at me...maybe things wouldn't have gotten so out of control. And Sean wouldn't be in jail right now...
An orderly bursting into the room stops Ellie from going any further, "I'm sorry Doctor James' I know you have a session but we have a code red on the second floor."
"Ellie, dear, I'm so sorry to cut this short, I know we were getting somewhere today. But I want to reschedule for tomorrow."
Ellie shakes her head, "our normal time will be all right."
"You're sure?"
Ellie nods, "I'm sure."
