Title: Made For A Maid
Author: Waddles52
Summary: A series of little accidents add up to big
trouble.
Rating: PG 13
Category: MT, MSR
Disclaimer: These characters belong to Chris Carter,
1013 Productions and Fox Broadcasting. No copyright
infringement intended.
Archives: Written for the January Fic Challenge at
MR, after that, please ask.
Feedback: I'd love to hear from you.
Waddles52@insightbb.com
Thanks: To Lisa for her services as beta. I
couldn't do it without her.
"Mulder, they should be transferring you to your room
pretty soon." Scully ran her fingers through his
sweaty hair, a very sad look on her face.
"Can't wait." Mulder looked at her through sleepy
eyes, the pain medication and muscle relaxant
beginning to work their magic.
This weekend had started out with such promise and
now he was going to be tied to a hospital bed the
entire time. Life wasn't fair and all because of
some stupid, little domestic accidents.
Earlier that day, 1PM.
Mulder was packing up his briefcase, ready to take a
half-day off. It wasn't his choice, but the powers-
that-be had insisted that he take his accumulated
vacation days. He had talked them in to a compromise
and he was taking them a day at a time or a half-day,
as was the case today.
"Scully, I hate to leave you here with all of this
work."
"Oh, it's not so bad. What are you going to do with
your half-day?"
"I thought I would clean up my apartment a little
bit. The new love in my life prefers her
surroundings clutter-free and sparkling clean," he
grinned.
"A woman after my own heart. I'm sure she'll reward
you exceedingly well." Scully's eyes twinkled as a
huge smile spread across her face. It was all he
could do to stop the groan that threatened to escape
his lips.
"You think so? If you were to guess, when do you
think my love would arrive?"
"This is just a guess, but I'd say she'd come
straight from work bringing dinner with her. At
least, that's what I'd do if I were her."
"Then I'd better get out of here and get busy." He
grabbed his coat and stopped in the doorway. "I
wonder how she'll reward me?" He had a definite
twinkle in his eye that almost made Scully laugh out
loud.
"I'm not sure, but I'd be willing to bet it will be
quite enjoyable." She let her tongue slide across
her bottom lip slowly for effect. His eyes widened
mischievously. She loved to tease him.
"That sounds wonderful. I'll have to fill you in on
the details when I see you again."
Scully looked up from the computer. "I'll be waiting
with bells on."
"Interesting visual. I'll see you later."
"Count on it."
Mulder whistled all the way to his car, going over
his plan of attack. Maybe he should hire a maid.
No, his love would be more appreciative of his hard
work. Humming along with the radio, he made his way
home barely aware of how he got there.
After changing into an old pair of sweats and a
muscle shirt, Mulder decided to tackle the grungiest
room first. That was definitely the kitchen. He
tried to think of the last time he had really cleaned
it and came up blank. Oh well, there was a first
time for everything. He stood in the doorway and
surveyed the damage. "Might as well start at the
top," he decided, pulling out a kitchen chair and
positioning it by the cabinets. "Cobwebs, prepare to
meet your doom."
After attacking the cobwebs with a broom, he grabbed
a rag and climbed onto the chair to dust the tops of
the cabinets, determined to get every last molecule
of annoying dust and dirt. As he worked he felt a
strong sense of accomplishment. It was looking great
and Scully would be proud.
He found that he had to stretch and stand on tiptoe
to reach the far corner. The chair wobbled ominously
and the next thing he knew he was sprawled on the
floor holding his right ankle. "Shit! Why me?"
It hurt so much that he was almost afraid to let go,
expecting to see his ankle fall off in his hands when
he finally got up the courage to take a look. It was
already beginning to swell. Pushing himself up, he
found that he could put some weight on it. Deciding
it wasn't broken, he stoically prepared to finish
what he he'd started. There would be plenty of time
to put ice on it after he was finished cleaning.
With a vow to be more careful, he went back to work.
After an hour of hard work he declared the kitchen
presentable. Even the refrigerator was cleaned and
disinfected and the suspicious odor had been
vanquished under a haze of air freshener.
Overcoming the urge to rest, he made his way to the
bathroom. The shower and tub were definitely in need
of some 'scrubbing bubbles' and son-of-a-bitch, there
were cobwebs in the bathroom too. The F.B.I. agent
groaned and went in search of the broom he had used
earlier.
His ankle protesting mightily, he knocked the cobwebs
down and went to work on the tub. As he knelt to
clean around the bottom, he felt something pop in his
right knee. Instant pain! No time to give into it
though, the bathroom needed to be pristine. He
gulped a few mouthfuls of steadying air and carried
on.
Mulder limped through his chores, his knee and ankle
competing for the honor of which hurt the most. The
only good thing was that the injuries were on the
same side. At least he could still get around if he
was careful.
The next stop was the bedroom. Nothing major there.
He just needed to put his dirty clothes in the
hamper, check under the bed for obnoxious lurking
things and change the sheets. The love-struck agent
made quick work of picking up his dirty clothes and
checking under the bed. Although he was tempted to
lie down and prop his injured leg on a couple of
pillows, he grabbed the cotton percale sheets that
Scully had picked out and began to put on the fitted
sheet. As he stretched to pull it taut, he was
knocked to the floor by a lightning bolt of pain in
his lower back.
"Damnit! What now?" He made an effort to get up and
straighten his spine but was met with another
shockwave of pain. He eventually managed to finish
making the bed with his back parallel to the floor.
That only left the living room. Piece of cake! All
he had to do was put some videos and magazines away
and straighten up his desk. He shuffled into the
bathroom and stopped to grab the lemon furniture
polish and a dust rag from the linen closet.
After clearing off the coffee table, he prepared to
spray a generous amount of polish on the flat
surface. Unfortunately, the spray nozzle was
pointing toward his face. He screamed as the
stinging spray hit his eyes. As he searched blindly
for the dust rag, he lost his balance and crashed
into the coffee table, hitting the edge. The ribs on
his right side screamed in agony. The air was full
of blue words and lemon polish particles.
After wiping the polish from his eyes and bathing
them in water, he managed to complete his task by
limping around and holding his side. Each breath was
agony. He painfully sank onto the couch and looked
at his watch. 6:15! Scully would be there any
minute! He slowly got up from the couch and made his
way to the bedroom, hunched over, limping and holding
his ribs. The apartment looked wonderful and he was
a wreck!
He picked out clean clothes and sat on the side of
the bed, hoping to gather the strength to get his
dirty, streaked clothes off and clean ones on.
That's where Scully found him 15 minutes later.
"Mulder, the apartment looks and smells great! Why
don't you finish changing clothes while I set the
food out? I decided to get something different for a
change so we're having a Mexican feast."
"Um, do you think you could bring the food in here?"
he asked pitifully.
"Well, I could, but I'd rather not get taco sauce on
the nice, clean sheets."
"Scully, I have a confession to make." Her eyebrow
arched as she waited for him to continue. "I had a
few minor accidents and well . . .this is
embarrassing."
"Mulder, what's embarrassing?" She ambled over and
sat beside him on the bed. The slight movement
caused by her weight on the mattress brought forth a
huge groan from her hapless partner.
"What happened? What did you do to yourself?"
"Would you like it in the order of occurrence or an
injury list by location?" He gritted his teeth
against the pain while trying to make light of the
situation.
"Any order you like." Scully's happiness was now
turning to concern. Her eyes grew wide as he recited
the afternoon's unfortunate catalog of events.
"Now, do you see why I'm so embarrassed?" He ducked
his head.
"I can't fathom how you were able to continue working
through all of that pain." She immediately indicated
that she wanted to examine each new injury.
"I wanted everything to look nice for you."
"Mulder, if I wasn't afraid I'd injure you further,
I'd give you a big hug."
"There's nothing more I'd rather do than to take you
in my arms, but at the rate my luck has been going my
elbows would probably lock." He tried to laugh, but
the pain in his back and ribs stopped him.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Mulder sighed as he reviewed the day's events and his
injury list. His attempt at housekeeping had netted
him an ankle fracture, torn knee cartilage, a severe
back strain and two fractured ribs.
The next time he felt the urge to clean he was
definitely hiring a maid!
In the meantime, his usual bed at the hospital was
calling.
The End
Author: Waddles52
Summary: A series of little accidents add up to big
trouble.
Rating: PG 13
Category: MT, MSR
Disclaimer: These characters belong to Chris Carter,
1013 Productions and Fox Broadcasting. No copyright
infringement intended.
Archives: Written for the January Fic Challenge at
MR, after that, please ask.
Feedback: I'd love to hear from you.
Waddles52@insightbb.com
Thanks: To Lisa for her services as beta. I
couldn't do it without her.
"Mulder, they should be transferring you to your room
pretty soon." Scully ran her fingers through his
sweaty hair, a very sad look on her face.
"Can't wait." Mulder looked at her through sleepy
eyes, the pain medication and muscle relaxant
beginning to work their magic.
This weekend had started out with such promise and
now he was going to be tied to a hospital bed the
entire time. Life wasn't fair and all because of
some stupid, little domestic accidents.
Earlier that day, 1PM.
Mulder was packing up his briefcase, ready to take a
half-day off. It wasn't his choice, but the powers-
that-be had insisted that he take his accumulated
vacation days. He had talked them in to a compromise
and he was taking them a day at a time or a half-day,
as was the case today.
"Scully, I hate to leave you here with all of this
work."
"Oh, it's not so bad. What are you going to do with
your half-day?"
"I thought I would clean up my apartment a little
bit. The new love in my life prefers her
surroundings clutter-free and sparkling clean," he
grinned.
"A woman after my own heart. I'm sure she'll reward
you exceedingly well." Scully's eyes twinkled as a
huge smile spread across her face. It was all he
could do to stop the groan that threatened to escape
his lips.
"You think so? If you were to guess, when do you
think my love would arrive?"
"This is just a guess, but I'd say she'd come
straight from work bringing dinner with her. At
least, that's what I'd do if I were her."
"Then I'd better get out of here and get busy." He
grabbed his coat and stopped in the doorway. "I
wonder how she'll reward me?" He had a definite
twinkle in his eye that almost made Scully laugh out
loud.
"I'm not sure, but I'd be willing to bet it will be
quite enjoyable." She let her tongue slide across
her bottom lip slowly for effect. His eyes widened
mischievously. She loved to tease him.
"That sounds wonderful. I'll have to fill you in on
the details when I see you again."
Scully looked up from the computer. "I'll be waiting
with bells on."
"Interesting visual. I'll see you later."
"Count on it."
Mulder whistled all the way to his car, going over
his plan of attack. Maybe he should hire a maid.
No, his love would be more appreciative of his hard
work. Humming along with the radio, he made his way
home barely aware of how he got there.
After changing into an old pair of sweats and a
muscle shirt, Mulder decided to tackle the grungiest
room first. That was definitely the kitchen. He
tried to think of the last time he had really cleaned
it and came up blank. Oh well, there was a first
time for everything. He stood in the doorway and
surveyed the damage. "Might as well start at the
top," he decided, pulling out a kitchen chair and
positioning it by the cabinets. "Cobwebs, prepare to
meet your doom."
After attacking the cobwebs with a broom, he grabbed
a rag and climbed onto the chair to dust the tops of
the cabinets, determined to get every last molecule
of annoying dust and dirt. As he worked he felt a
strong sense of accomplishment. It was looking great
and Scully would be proud.
He found that he had to stretch and stand on tiptoe
to reach the far corner. The chair wobbled ominously
and the next thing he knew he was sprawled on the
floor holding his right ankle. "Shit! Why me?"
It hurt so much that he was almost afraid to let go,
expecting to see his ankle fall off in his hands when
he finally got up the courage to take a look. It was
already beginning to swell. Pushing himself up, he
found that he could put some weight on it. Deciding
it wasn't broken, he stoically prepared to finish
what he he'd started. There would be plenty of time
to put ice on it after he was finished cleaning.
With a vow to be more careful, he went back to work.
After an hour of hard work he declared the kitchen
presentable. Even the refrigerator was cleaned and
disinfected and the suspicious odor had been
vanquished under a haze of air freshener.
Overcoming the urge to rest, he made his way to the
bathroom. The shower and tub were definitely in need
of some 'scrubbing bubbles' and son-of-a-bitch, there
were cobwebs in the bathroom too. The F.B.I. agent
groaned and went in search of the broom he had used
earlier.
His ankle protesting mightily, he knocked the cobwebs
down and went to work on the tub. As he knelt to
clean around the bottom, he felt something pop in his
right knee. Instant pain! No time to give into it
though, the bathroom needed to be pristine. He
gulped a few mouthfuls of steadying air and carried
on.
Mulder limped through his chores, his knee and ankle
competing for the honor of which hurt the most. The
only good thing was that the injuries were on the
same side. At least he could still get around if he
was careful.
The next stop was the bedroom. Nothing major there.
He just needed to put his dirty clothes in the
hamper, check under the bed for obnoxious lurking
things and change the sheets. The love-struck agent
made quick work of picking up his dirty clothes and
checking under the bed. Although he was tempted to
lie down and prop his injured leg on a couple of
pillows, he grabbed the cotton percale sheets that
Scully had picked out and began to put on the fitted
sheet. As he stretched to pull it taut, he was
knocked to the floor by a lightning bolt of pain in
his lower back.
"Damnit! What now?" He made an effort to get up and
straighten his spine but was met with another
shockwave of pain. He eventually managed to finish
making the bed with his back parallel to the floor.
That only left the living room. Piece of cake! All
he had to do was put some videos and magazines away
and straighten up his desk. He shuffled into the
bathroom and stopped to grab the lemon furniture
polish and a dust rag from the linen closet.
After clearing off the coffee table, he prepared to
spray a generous amount of polish on the flat
surface. Unfortunately, the spray nozzle was
pointing toward his face. He screamed as the
stinging spray hit his eyes. As he searched blindly
for the dust rag, he lost his balance and crashed
into the coffee table, hitting the edge. The ribs on
his right side screamed in agony. The air was full
of blue words and lemon polish particles.
After wiping the polish from his eyes and bathing
them in water, he managed to complete his task by
limping around and holding his side. Each breath was
agony. He painfully sank onto the couch and looked
at his watch. 6:15! Scully would be there any
minute! He slowly got up from the couch and made his
way to the bedroom, hunched over, limping and holding
his ribs. The apartment looked wonderful and he was
a wreck!
He picked out clean clothes and sat on the side of
the bed, hoping to gather the strength to get his
dirty, streaked clothes off and clean ones on.
That's where Scully found him 15 minutes later.
"Mulder, the apartment looks and smells great! Why
don't you finish changing clothes while I set the
food out? I decided to get something different for a
change so we're having a Mexican feast."
"Um, do you think you could bring the food in here?"
he asked pitifully.
"Well, I could, but I'd rather not get taco sauce on
the nice, clean sheets."
"Scully, I have a confession to make." Her eyebrow
arched as she waited for him to continue. "I had a
few minor accidents and well . . .this is
embarrassing."
"Mulder, what's embarrassing?" She ambled over and
sat beside him on the bed. The slight movement
caused by her weight on the mattress brought forth a
huge groan from her hapless partner.
"What happened? What did you do to yourself?"
"Would you like it in the order of occurrence or an
injury list by location?" He gritted his teeth
against the pain while trying to make light of the
situation.
"Any order you like." Scully's happiness was now
turning to concern. Her eyes grew wide as he recited
the afternoon's unfortunate catalog of events.
"Now, do you see why I'm so embarrassed?" He ducked
his head.
"I can't fathom how you were able to continue working
through all of that pain." She immediately indicated
that she wanted to examine each new injury.
"I wanted everything to look nice for you."
"Mulder, if I wasn't afraid I'd injure you further,
I'd give you a big hug."
"There's nothing more I'd rather do than to take you
in my arms, but at the rate my luck has been going my
elbows would probably lock." He tried to laugh, but
the pain in his back and ribs stopped him.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Mulder sighed as he reviewed the day's events and his
injury list. His attempt at housekeeping had netted
him an ankle fracture, torn knee cartilage, a severe
back strain and two fractured ribs.
The next time he felt the urge to clean he was
definitely hiring a maid!
In the meantime, his usual bed at the hospital was
calling.
The End
