Songs:
Daniel Bedingfield, "If you're not the one"
Back Street Boys, "I thought she knew."
Chapter 3: Trust
TJ hurried to Ashley's side as pieces of the mug scattered the floor. Her face was ghostly white and she looked like she was going to be sick. He gently grabbed her arm and maneuvered her away from the ceramic shards and seated her on the couch. TJ was convinced now more than before that Ashley wasn't lying. How could everyone else look past all the evidence? Granted he didn't know if it was Shelley or not, but until he found out if she was still in prison, he still considered her a suspect.
"Ash, I don't think you should stay here alone." TJ began slowly, trying not to frighten her more. She glanced up at him in surprise before she jumped off the couch.
"Where am I going to go TJ?" She retorted angrily as she quickly shook off the incident. "No one would believe me anyway." Ashley declared sadly as she sat back down.
TJ sat down next to her." Listen Ashley, maybe it would help if I talked." He started to say but she interrupted him, "NO! TJ, you can't tell them. Promise me you won't tell them." She pleaded with the officer, grabbing his hands and staring at him. Tears glistened in her brown eyes, and TJ felt himself weakening.
"Alright Ash. I won't tell them. But you can't stay here. I'll be off in about two hours, I'll come pick you up then and you can stay at my apartment." He offered as a compromise, to which Ashley quickly agreed.
She heard the door shut behind him as he let himself out. Ashley closed her eyes trying to shut out the images that began to play in her mind. Reluctantly she swept up the pieces of the mug and threw them in the garbage. Ashley took her time in the shower, washing the dirt off her body from her near collision with the car. Inside she felt as damaged as she looked on the outside as she inspected the bruises that were scattered across her body.
Ashley stood in front of the mirror as she brushed through the tangles in her wet hair. She paused to check out her reflection. She grimaced as she took in the pale complexion that had taken over her once beautiful tan. The dark circles under her eyes testified to the many sleepless nights she had suffered through, and the red eyes were results of the hours of crying over Andros. She could see the fresh bruises on her skin from her collision with the concrete curb this morning. She pulled the towel tighter around her, as she realized she had lost weight in the last few days. Staring at herself in the mirror she no longer recognized herself. Gone was the cheerful and fun loving girl she remembered being. In her place stood an anxious and tough girl, which was only looking to survive. She quickly packed a bag to take to TJ's, not knowing how long she would be there, and relieved that she wouldn't have to be alone.
TJ opened the door to his apartment, and followed Ashley in. It was a simple two-bedroom apartment with a kitchen and living room but Ashley was impressed nonetheless. This was the first time she had been here, she thought guiltily. "I love your place Teej." She complimented him honestly. "I'm sorry I never came to visit you before." She apologized as she sat down on the couch with him and they dug into their Chinese food that TJ had picked up on his way to pick up Ashley.
"Don't worry about it. I never thought we'd be as busy as we all are now, and we're not even Rangers." TJ cracked, making Ashley smile for the first time that day. She had forgotten how well her and TJ had always gotten along, he always made her feel at ease.
"So how come you didn't want to stay with your dad?" TJ confronted her suddenly. She looked down, embarrassed. "He wants me to see a counselor. If I told him about everything that's been happening, I swear he'd have me committed." Tears sprung up in her eyes, and Ashley forcefully brushed them away, irritated at herself for giving into her tears once again.
"I'm sorry Ash." TJ tried to console the troubled girl. He couldn't image how it would feel to have all your friends and family desert you. "You can stay here until we get this sorted out." TJ let the matter drop after that, allowing her to be distracted by the television. He was relieved when she fell asleep not long after, and he determined he would do whatever it took to see her through this.
TJ sat there a few more minutes watching the brown haired beauty as she slept. "I hope Andros knows how lucky he is." He thought to himself as he finally dragged himself off to bed.
As he lay in bed, he thought about the fact that he and Ashley didn't really know each other well. They were friends of course, as well as teammates, but with Carlos and Cassie around, the two of them never hung out alone much. He wasn't attracted to her, but he couldn't help but think she was beautiful. She was smart, fun to be with, and most of all caring and loyal. But even he could see the toll the last few days had taken on her. There was a sadness about her, and the hollowness in her eyes instead of their usual glowing sparkle gave her away.
Monday morning.
Cassie parked her car, and made her way through the parking lot to the grocery store. She stopped to tie her shoe, and when she glanced up she saw a suspicious scene. She saw Ashley leaving TJ's apartment. She kept looking at the pair hoping for some clue as to what was going on since she could not hear what they were saying.
"I'll be working the late shift tonight so I probably won't see you until tomorrow." TJ said to her as he walked her out to her car.
"Thanks for everything Teej." She spoke softly as she wrapped her arms around him to give him a big hug. "I don't know what I'd do without you", she added. Before pulling away she kissed his cheek to show her gratitude. He watched as she got in her car and drove away.
Cassie hid behind a tree before TJ spotted her. "TJ and Ashley?" She wondered incredulously. Andros had mentioned that Ashley seemed distant these days, but surely she wouldn't cheat on him. And certainly not with TJ. But how could you explain that embrace? And the kiss? She waited until TJ had gone inside and hurried back home, her trip to the grocery store forgotten.
At Kat's Café. Andros and Cassie were seated in a corner booth. She had called him on her cell phone on her way home and he agreed to meet her.
"What's this all about Cass?" He greeted her cheerfully. Cassie paused. Maybe she shouldn't tell him, but he didn't deserve to be hurt, so she confessed what she had witnessed.
"Um, well I was at the grocery store and I looked up and saw Ashley leaving TJ's apartment this morning." She explained slowly, hoping she didn't have to give any more details.
To Andros' credit, he understood her meaning. "Ashley and TJ? Are you sure Cass?" Andros didn't want to believe her, but Ashley's behavior of late was certainly strange. He had thought it was because of the nightmares, but she hadn't informed him of any new incidents. And she had seemed a bit uncomfortable around him.
"I know what I saw Andros. I'm sorry." She said contritely as she finished her coffee. Andros lost his appetite and quickly left the café. He needed to talk to Ashley. He was so filled with disappointment and anger that he never said goodbye to Cassie.
She sighed. "Did I do the right thing?" she wondered, not knowing how the rest of the day's events would turn out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thanks for coming Ashley." Mr. Hammond greeted his daughter warmly as she stepped into the house. "I was just wondering if you had given more thought to my suggestions." He questioned purposefully, forgoing any pretense of trivial talk as they made their way into the kitchen.
Ashley sighed, how many times do I have to convince him I'm not crazy! Her mind screamed at her, but she maintained her calm composure on the outside. Placing her hands on the counter, she turned to address her father.
"Listen Dad. I'm sorry to have worried you and Jeff. I must have overreacted to having those nightmares again." She lied, hoping he would believe her. She hated having to lie to him, but she could not ignore the look of relief that appeared on his face when she admitted to having overreacted to the nightmares. She even pasted on a fake smile for his benefit.
"I'm glad to hear that Ashley. I couldn't bear the thought of something happening to you." He declared, giving his daughter a huge hug. Ashley's mind rebelled against his sentiment. What if something does happen to me? What if it's too late for you to believe me? She cried to herself. She said goodbye to her dad, and as she glanced around as she left, she wished that all her feelings of danger would just go away. There was a huge wedge in her relationship with her father and brother, which would not go away until this matter was resolved. And then there was her relationship with Andros. She knew she was being distant with him, but what choice did he leave her when he refused to believe her?
Ashley waited until after she left her father's house to release her anger. She had stopped by to see him on her way to school by his request, only to be bombarded by questions. She had hoped he would consider her feelings, but upon confrontation she realized he was just as stubborn as she was. There was no way she was going to tell him about all the other incidents, she determined.
She still had an hour to spare before class and decided to take a walk down by the lake to relax herself. She was halfway there when Andros called on her cell phone and asked to meet her at the gardens. She agreed, hoping he would make her day better, as he usually seemed to do.
"Hey!" she greeted him happily, chasing bitter thoughts of her morning away. She moved to hug him, but was dismayed when he pulled away.
"Ash, I think we should talk." He began seriously, startling Ashley and dashing any hopes of salvaging her day. This can't be good. she thought dispiritly as they strolled through the gardens.
Her fears were well founded when he continued. "Listen Ash. I have something I have to ask, and I need you to be honest with me."
Ashley interrupted him at once declaring, "When have I not been honest with you?" she felt her walls go up in defense, not liking where this conversation was headed. She was so focused on him that she missed the beautiful scenery around her.
"It's like this. Cassie saw you leaving TJ's apartment." He confessed to Ashley's puzzlement. "Early this morning." He finished, clarifying his statement.
"And she thought?" Ashley gasped in horror. "And you thought?" She blurted out in disbelief. Before Andros could answer, she rambled on. "You thought I was cheating on you!" Her voice increased in volume. "With TJ?" she finished angrily. "Of all the things, Andros. Why would I cheat on you?" She finally quieted down, stopping to look at him.
He could see the hurt all over her face. Could Cassie have been wrong? He thought, too late. "You've been sort of distant lately Ash." He argued, though he knew it was weak.
Ashley could not contain herself anymore. "If I was distant lately it's because I wasn't sure about us Andros. I didn't know if you saw us as a serious couple or if we were just playing around." She admitted softly, turning away from him.
"Why didn't you just ask me?" He questioned her curiously, watching her gaze across the field.
She waited a few minutes before turning back to him." I was afraid. I was afraid that you might not love me as much as I love you Andros." She confessed tearfully. He reached out to her but she stepped out of the way.
"I do love you Ash." he started to say but she continued to move farther away from him.
"Those are just words Andros. You don't act like it. If you don't trust me, how can you love me?" She queried honestly. Her point hit home, as he was rendered speechless. He could not coax the words out of his mouth, though his breaking heart was desperately pleading with him to do so.
"I'm sorry Ash." He whispers sadly, feeling like they had just crossed the point of no return.
"I am too." She replies. "I think we both need some time and space to think things over." Her statement hung over the two them like a dark cloud. There were so many things they both wanted to say, things they should have said before, and now it looked like it might be too late.
She began to walk away but turned back for one last moment. "I love you Andros. I hope we can make it back to each other someday. Soon." She had to say it. She knew she would regret it if something did happen to her. She would remember the look on his face forever. His hazel eyes filled with tears, his face full of regret. Walking away was the hardest thing she had ever done. But like she reminded herself, if he didn't trust her, how could he love her? Determined, she continued walking. Walking out of the garden, and away from Andros. She knew it was right, even though her heart felt like it was shattering in a million pieces. They needed some time to think things through.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?"
The chorus ran through her head as she slowly made her way to class. The Daniel Bedingfield song had been playing when she parked her car in the campus parking lot. As she thought about those words, she decided against going to class, and voted to drown her sorrows in a Grande latte from the college coffee shop instead.
Ashley had almost convinced herself that she would be okay, when she spotted Carlos and Cassie coming her way from across the campus lawn. She was going to attempt to hide from them when all the anger of the past week bubbled to the surface and she couldn't keep it all inside anymore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Andros groaned as yet another sad love song came over the radio. But he was too depressed to change the station. He recognized the song as a Back street Boys song that he heard once. Ashley loved all the cheesy boy band music.
"She was my once in a lifetime, Happy ending come true Oh I guess I should have told her I thought she knew She said I took her for granted That's the last thing I would do Whoa I'll never understand it I thought she knew I thought she knew
How did this happen? He thought. How could she not have known how much I loved her? I still love her. He corrected himself. He could still see the hurt in her eyes when he confronted her. She was right, how could he believe she would cheat on him? She had never done anything to make him not trust her, and in less than a week, he found himself doubting her constantly. Did he love her? He asked himself honestly, and the unbearable loneliness that surrounded him confirmed that he did.
I thought she knew My world revolved around her My love light burned for her alone But she couldn't see the flame Only myself to blame I should have known I should have known
She stood by me when she had no reason to believe. She never questioned me. And anytime I needed her, whether I knew it or not, she as always by my side. And the first time she needs me, I don't believe her. He berated himself for his stupidity. The real question should be how could she love me? He wondered as he continued to slip into despair.
A heart full of words left unspoken Now that we're through I'd sell my soul to have this silence broken Oh I thought she knew I thought she knew"
I was so afraid of losing her that I never opened up to her. He recalled all those times he could have told her how much he loved her. And that fear of losing her has actually caused me that which I dreaded the most, having to live without her. He was sure there could never be anyone else for him. He would have to find some way to get her back. Resolved, he removed himself from his bedroom and vowed to make it right.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hey Ash!" Carlos greeted the brown haired girl, unaware of what had just happened. She ignored him as she stood face to face to confront Cassie. She simply stared for a minute before going into her tirade.
"Thanks a lot Cass!" Ashley shouted furiously. "Why didn't you ask me before telling Andros that TJ and I were having an affair?" She dared the dark haired girl to reply.
"What? Did I miss something?" Carlos asked in bewilderment. Ashley shot him a look that made him shut up. He thought she was totally crazy until he noticed Cassie squirming uncomfortably next to him. What is going on here? He wondered.
"I just told him what I saw Ash." Cassie tried to explain, pleading with her friend to believe her.
"And what did you see Cassie?" She asked in quiet voice that demanded an answer, crossing her arms waiting her response.
"I saw you leaving TJ's apartment this morning." She finally answered, knowing how lame that sounded.
"So anytime I leave someone's apartment, you should assume that I'm cheating on Andros?" She asked in disbelief, her face turning red with anger. "And with TJ? I mean he's a great friend, but come on Cass." She exclaimed in disbelief.
Cassie had no answer for her. "I'm sorry Ash, I know I should have asked you first." She apologized, but to no avail. Ashley was understandably upset, and showed no signs of calming down.
"Yeah you should have Cass." Ashley replied in an unforgiving tone of voice. "And for your information, TJ and I aren't dating, and now thanks to you, neither are me and Andros." She shocked them with her statement, and rushed away from the scene. Cassie and Carlos were speechless. Carlos was about to ask her about what happened when another person arrived.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "She's not cheating on me." He angrily informed the duo, though he was so focused on Cassie, he didn't know Carlos was even there.
"I know. She just ripped into me." Cassie reported quietly to Andros; hoping to calm him down. She didn't know if she could take another fight. "I didn't know she would break up with you." She commented in disbelief as she looked down at her shoes, disgusted with herself for overreacting.
"Well she did." Andros declared. "And now you have to help me figure out a way to get her back." He commanded, as his anger slowly dissipated, replaced by sorrow. Carlos finally interjected, taking pity on the pair and he led them to the coffee shop to discuss the plan of action.
Ashley spent the last hour before she had to go to work wandering aimlessly through downtown Angel Grove. She was so caught up in her thoughts, she totally missed any of the sales going on around her. The sounds of laughter and the sights of couples totally depressed her as she made her way to the boutique. Hopefully work would keep her mind occupied for a few hours.
4 PM
As she pushed open the door she was ambushed by her co-workers, who were relieved to be leaving. "Hey Ash!" Tara called cheerfully as she quickly made her exit. Ashley went to wave but the bubbly red head was already out the door. She shook her head as she clocked in to begin her shift.
"Thanks for closing for me Ashley, I really appreciate it." Kari declared gratefully as she clocked out herself.
"No problem Kar. Have a great time on your date tonight. You better call me with all the details." She mock threatened her friend who was grinning from ear to ear.
"Better yet I'll tell you myself tomorrow. I switched with Andie to work tomorrow with you." Kari announced happily. Ashley grinned at her friend's antics. She was glad for her. But thinking of her friend's upcoming date reminded her of the events she had unsuccessful tried to forget. The grin faded as she recalled the ugly scene from the morning when she had broken up with Andros.
"Are you okay Ash?" Kari asked suddenly, sensing a difference in her mood, as Ashley stared off into space.
"Andros and I broke up this morning." She quietly confided in her co-worker as the two talked freely since there were no customers in the store.
"Oh Ash. I'm so sorry. I know you loved him." She consoled the distressed girl. "What happened?" Ashley explained the whole episode while Kari listened intently. "Do you still love him?" she gently inquired. Ashley could only nod her confirmation.
"How about I cancel my date, and after work you and I will go out and get totally plastered." Kari suggested, finally getting Ashley to crack a smile.
"It's alright Kar. You go and have a good time. I just want to be alone anyway." She confessed. Kari finally agreed to go on her date. As she was about to leave, she remembered what she had to tell Ashley. "Some lady was in here earlier looking for you." Ashley thinks nothing of it, as she is too preoccupied.
The day passes by slowly as few customers pass through the store. Ashley doesn't mind the loneliness; she keeps herself busy by folding clothes and making a new display for the front window.
7 PM
Ashley takes her salad from the refrigerator and sits down with her novel to enjoy a quiet dinner.
In the dark isolated parking lot behind the motel, the woman loads up her trunk with the necessary supplies. She goes over her list one more time. Satisfied, she closes the trunk and drives her car to the nearest gas station to fill up with gas. It's almost time for her to put her plan into action.
With darkness already arrived, she pulls her Honda accord onto an unpaved gravel road behind an abandoned junkyard and parks it. She waits until 8:45pm to leave the car. She pulled on a large hooded sweatshirt, and stuck an old baseball hat on her now blonde head. Throwing away her cigarette, she moves into position, lurking in the shadows as she awaits the girl who has ruined her life. She controls her breathing as to not alert anyone to the extra presence in the parking lot. She holds a brick in her left hand, ready to immobilize Ashley when the moment arises.
Ashley looked up with a start as the clock chimed nine times. Finally closing time, she thought with a small smile. Maybe I can go to bed and forget this terrible day." She decided hopefully as she locked the front door and switched the sign to closed. She locked the register and put the books in the safe. Turning off the lights, she slid her time card through the clock. 9:04PM it read as she put it back in her designated slot. Grabbing her purse she exited through the back door.
She didn't have to wait long. At 9:05 PM, Ashley left through the back exit to Nonchalance and headed unconcerned to her car. Shelley crept up on the unsuspecting girl, as Ashley put her keys in her door to open her Volkswagen, a strong blow to her head had her crumpling to the ground, completely unconscious. Shelley tossed the brick away and grabbed under Ashley's arms and pulled the girl away from her car and through the woods to where her car was waiting.
Shelley laid Ashley on the ground besides her car and tied her arms and feet. She placed a bandana over her eyes and one in her mouth to keep her quiet in case she awoke. And for extra measure, she injected Ashley with a sedative before laying her on the floor of the back of the car. Smirking to herself for a job well done, she threw a blanket over the lifeless girl and closed the door. Shelley hopped into the drivers seat and took off, beginning the journey to her final destination.
Chapter 3: Trust
TJ hurried to Ashley's side as pieces of the mug scattered the floor. Her face was ghostly white and she looked like she was going to be sick. He gently grabbed her arm and maneuvered her away from the ceramic shards and seated her on the couch. TJ was convinced now more than before that Ashley wasn't lying. How could everyone else look past all the evidence? Granted he didn't know if it was Shelley or not, but until he found out if she was still in prison, he still considered her a suspect.
"Ash, I don't think you should stay here alone." TJ began slowly, trying not to frighten her more. She glanced up at him in surprise before she jumped off the couch.
"Where am I going to go TJ?" She retorted angrily as she quickly shook off the incident. "No one would believe me anyway." Ashley declared sadly as she sat back down.
TJ sat down next to her." Listen Ashley, maybe it would help if I talked." He started to say but she interrupted him, "NO! TJ, you can't tell them. Promise me you won't tell them." She pleaded with the officer, grabbing his hands and staring at him. Tears glistened in her brown eyes, and TJ felt himself weakening.
"Alright Ash. I won't tell them. But you can't stay here. I'll be off in about two hours, I'll come pick you up then and you can stay at my apartment." He offered as a compromise, to which Ashley quickly agreed.
She heard the door shut behind him as he let himself out. Ashley closed her eyes trying to shut out the images that began to play in her mind. Reluctantly she swept up the pieces of the mug and threw them in the garbage. Ashley took her time in the shower, washing the dirt off her body from her near collision with the car. Inside she felt as damaged as she looked on the outside as she inspected the bruises that were scattered across her body.
Ashley stood in front of the mirror as she brushed through the tangles in her wet hair. She paused to check out her reflection. She grimaced as she took in the pale complexion that had taken over her once beautiful tan. The dark circles under her eyes testified to the many sleepless nights she had suffered through, and the red eyes were results of the hours of crying over Andros. She could see the fresh bruises on her skin from her collision with the concrete curb this morning. She pulled the towel tighter around her, as she realized she had lost weight in the last few days. Staring at herself in the mirror she no longer recognized herself. Gone was the cheerful and fun loving girl she remembered being. In her place stood an anxious and tough girl, which was only looking to survive. She quickly packed a bag to take to TJ's, not knowing how long she would be there, and relieved that she wouldn't have to be alone.
TJ opened the door to his apartment, and followed Ashley in. It was a simple two-bedroom apartment with a kitchen and living room but Ashley was impressed nonetheless. This was the first time she had been here, she thought guiltily. "I love your place Teej." She complimented him honestly. "I'm sorry I never came to visit you before." She apologized as she sat down on the couch with him and they dug into their Chinese food that TJ had picked up on his way to pick up Ashley.
"Don't worry about it. I never thought we'd be as busy as we all are now, and we're not even Rangers." TJ cracked, making Ashley smile for the first time that day. She had forgotten how well her and TJ had always gotten along, he always made her feel at ease.
"So how come you didn't want to stay with your dad?" TJ confronted her suddenly. She looked down, embarrassed. "He wants me to see a counselor. If I told him about everything that's been happening, I swear he'd have me committed." Tears sprung up in her eyes, and Ashley forcefully brushed them away, irritated at herself for giving into her tears once again.
"I'm sorry Ash." TJ tried to console the troubled girl. He couldn't image how it would feel to have all your friends and family desert you. "You can stay here until we get this sorted out." TJ let the matter drop after that, allowing her to be distracted by the television. He was relieved when she fell asleep not long after, and he determined he would do whatever it took to see her through this.
TJ sat there a few more minutes watching the brown haired beauty as she slept. "I hope Andros knows how lucky he is." He thought to himself as he finally dragged himself off to bed.
As he lay in bed, he thought about the fact that he and Ashley didn't really know each other well. They were friends of course, as well as teammates, but with Carlos and Cassie around, the two of them never hung out alone much. He wasn't attracted to her, but he couldn't help but think she was beautiful. She was smart, fun to be with, and most of all caring and loyal. But even he could see the toll the last few days had taken on her. There was a sadness about her, and the hollowness in her eyes instead of their usual glowing sparkle gave her away.
Monday morning.
Cassie parked her car, and made her way through the parking lot to the grocery store. She stopped to tie her shoe, and when she glanced up she saw a suspicious scene. She saw Ashley leaving TJ's apartment. She kept looking at the pair hoping for some clue as to what was going on since she could not hear what they were saying.
"I'll be working the late shift tonight so I probably won't see you until tomorrow." TJ said to her as he walked her out to her car.
"Thanks for everything Teej." She spoke softly as she wrapped her arms around him to give him a big hug. "I don't know what I'd do without you", she added. Before pulling away she kissed his cheek to show her gratitude. He watched as she got in her car and drove away.
Cassie hid behind a tree before TJ spotted her. "TJ and Ashley?" She wondered incredulously. Andros had mentioned that Ashley seemed distant these days, but surely she wouldn't cheat on him. And certainly not with TJ. But how could you explain that embrace? And the kiss? She waited until TJ had gone inside and hurried back home, her trip to the grocery store forgotten.
At Kat's Café. Andros and Cassie were seated in a corner booth. She had called him on her cell phone on her way home and he agreed to meet her.
"What's this all about Cass?" He greeted her cheerfully. Cassie paused. Maybe she shouldn't tell him, but he didn't deserve to be hurt, so she confessed what she had witnessed.
"Um, well I was at the grocery store and I looked up and saw Ashley leaving TJ's apartment this morning." She explained slowly, hoping she didn't have to give any more details.
To Andros' credit, he understood her meaning. "Ashley and TJ? Are you sure Cass?" Andros didn't want to believe her, but Ashley's behavior of late was certainly strange. He had thought it was because of the nightmares, but she hadn't informed him of any new incidents. And she had seemed a bit uncomfortable around him.
"I know what I saw Andros. I'm sorry." She said contritely as she finished her coffee. Andros lost his appetite and quickly left the café. He needed to talk to Ashley. He was so filled with disappointment and anger that he never said goodbye to Cassie.
She sighed. "Did I do the right thing?" she wondered, not knowing how the rest of the day's events would turn out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thanks for coming Ashley." Mr. Hammond greeted his daughter warmly as she stepped into the house. "I was just wondering if you had given more thought to my suggestions." He questioned purposefully, forgoing any pretense of trivial talk as they made their way into the kitchen.
Ashley sighed, how many times do I have to convince him I'm not crazy! Her mind screamed at her, but she maintained her calm composure on the outside. Placing her hands on the counter, she turned to address her father.
"Listen Dad. I'm sorry to have worried you and Jeff. I must have overreacted to having those nightmares again." She lied, hoping he would believe her. She hated having to lie to him, but she could not ignore the look of relief that appeared on his face when she admitted to having overreacted to the nightmares. She even pasted on a fake smile for his benefit.
"I'm glad to hear that Ashley. I couldn't bear the thought of something happening to you." He declared, giving his daughter a huge hug. Ashley's mind rebelled against his sentiment. What if something does happen to me? What if it's too late for you to believe me? She cried to herself. She said goodbye to her dad, and as she glanced around as she left, she wished that all her feelings of danger would just go away. There was a huge wedge in her relationship with her father and brother, which would not go away until this matter was resolved. And then there was her relationship with Andros. She knew she was being distant with him, but what choice did he leave her when he refused to believe her?
Ashley waited until after she left her father's house to release her anger. She had stopped by to see him on her way to school by his request, only to be bombarded by questions. She had hoped he would consider her feelings, but upon confrontation she realized he was just as stubborn as she was. There was no way she was going to tell him about all the other incidents, she determined.
She still had an hour to spare before class and decided to take a walk down by the lake to relax herself. She was halfway there when Andros called on her cell phone and asked to meet her at the gardens. She agreed, hoping he would make her day better, as he usually seemed to do.
"Hey!" she greeted him happily, chasing bitter thoughts of her morning away. She moved to hug him, but was dismayed when he pulled away.
"Ash, I think we should talk." He began seriously, startling Ashley and dashing any hopes of salvaging her day. This can't be good. she thought dispiritly as they strolled through the gardens.
Her fears were well founded when he continued. "Listen Ash. I have something I have to ask, and I need you to be honest with me."
Ashley interrupted him at once declaring, "When have I not been honest with you?" she felt her walls go up in defense, not liking where this conversation was headed. She was so focused on him that she missed the beautiful scenery around her.
"It's like this. Cassie saw you leaving TJ's apartment." He confessed to Ashley's puzzlement. "Early this morning." He finished, clarifying his statement.
"And she thought?" Ashley gasped in horror. "And you thought?" She blurted out in disbelief. Before Andros could answer, she rambled on. "You thought I was cheating on you!" Her voice increased in volume. "With TJ?" she finished angrily. "Of all the things, Andros. Why would I cheat on you?" She finally quieted down, stopping to look at him.
He could see the hurt all over her face. Could Cassie have been wrong? He thought, too late. "You've been sort of distant lately Ash." He argued, though he knew it was weak.
Ashley could not contain herself anymore. "If I was distant lately it's because I wasn't sure about us Andros. I didn't know if you saw us as a serious couple or if we were just playing around." She admitted softly, turning away from him.
"Why didn't you just ask me?" He questioned her curiously, watching her gaze across the field.
She waited a few minutes before turning back to him." I was afraid. I was afraid that you might not love me as much as I love you Andros." She confessed tearfully. He reached out to her but she stepped out of the way.
"I do love you Ash." he started to say but she continued to move farther away from him.
"Those are just words Andros. You don't act like it. If you don't trust me, how can you love me?" She queried honestly. Her point hit home, as he was rendered speechless. He could not coax the words out of his mouth, though his breaking heart was desperately pleading with him to do so.
"I'm sorry Ash." He whispers sadly, feeling like they had just crossed the point of no return.
"I am too." She replies. "I think we both need some time and space to think things over." Her statement hung over the two them like a dark cloud. There were so many things they both wanted to say, things they should have said before, and now it looked like it might be too late.
She began to walk away but turned back for one last moment. "I love you Andros. I hope we can make it back to each other someday. Soon." She had to say it. She knew she would regret it if something did happen to her. She would remember the look on his face forever. His hazel eyes filled with tears, his face full of regret. Walking away was the hardest thing she had ever done. But like she reminded herself, if he didn't trust her, how could he love her? Determined, she continued walking. Walking out of the garden, and away from Andros. She knew it was right, even though her heart felt like it was shattering in a million pieces. They needed some time to think things through.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?"
The chorus ran through her head as she slowly made her way to class. The Daniel Bedingfield song had been playing when she parked her car in the campus parking lot. As she thought about those words, she decided against going to class, and voted to drown her sorrows in a Grande latte from the college coffee shop instead.
Ashley had almost convinced herself that she would be okay, when she spotted Carlos and Cassie coming her way from across the campus lawn. She was going to attempt to hide from them when all the anger of the past week bubbled to the surface and she couldn't keep it all inside anymore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Andros groaned as yet another sad love song came over the radio. But he was too depressed to change the station. He recognized the song as a Back street Boys song that he heard once. Ashley loved all the cheesy boy band music.
"She was my once in a lifetime, Happy ending come true Oh I guess I should have told her I thought she knew She said I took her for granted That's the last thing I would do Whoa I'll never understand it I thought she knew I thought she knew
How did this happen? He thought. How could she not have known how much I loved her? I still love her. He corrected himself. He could still see the hurt in her eyes when he confronted her. She was right, how could he believe she would cheat on him? She had never done anything to make him not trust her, and in less than a week, he found himself doubting her constantly. Did he love her? He asked himself honestly, and the unbearable loneliness that surrounded him confirmed that he did.
I thought she knew My world revolved around her My love light burned for her alone But she couldn't see the flame Only myself to blame I should have known I should have known
She stood by me when she had no reason to believe. She never questioned me. And anytime I needed her, whether I knew it or not, she as always by my side. And the first time she needs me, I don't believe her. He berated himself for his stupidity. The real question should be how could she love me? He wondered as he continued to slip into despair.
A heart full of words left unspoken Now that we're through I'd sell my soul to have this silence broken Oh I thought she knew I thought she knew"
I was so afraid of losing her that I never opened up to her. He recalled all those times he could have told her how much he loved her. And that fear of losing her has actually caused me that which I dreaded the most, having to live without her. He was sure there could never be anyone else for him. He would have to find some way to get her back. Resolved, he removed himself from his bedroom and vowed to make it right.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hey Ash!" Carlos greeted the brown haired girl, unaware of what had just happened. She ignored him as she stood face to face to confront Cassie. She simply stared for a minute before going into her tirade.
"Thanks a lot Cass!" Ashley shouted furiously. "Why didn't you ask me before telling Andros that TJ and I were having an affair?" She dared the dark haired girl to reply.
"What? Did I miss something?" Carlos asked in bewilderment. Ashley shot him a look that made him shut up. He thought she was totally crazy until he noticed Cassie squirming uncomfortably next to him. What is going on here? He wondered.
"I just told him what I saw Ash." Cassie tried to explain, pleading with her friend to believe her.
"And what did you see Cassie?" She asked in quiet voice that demanded an answer, crossing her arms waiting her response.
"I saw you leaving TJ's apartment this morning." She finally answered, knowing how lame that sounded.
"So anytime I leave someone's apartment, you should assume that I'm cheating on Andros?" She asked in disbelief, her face turning red with anger. "And with TJ? I mean he's a great friend, but come on Cass." She exclaimed in disbelief.
Cassie had no answer for her. "I'm sorry Ash, I know I should have asked you first." She apologized, but to no avail. Ashley was understandably upset, and showed no signs of calming down.
"Yeah you should have Cass." Ashley replied in an unforgiving tone of voice. "And for your information, TJ and I aren't dating, and now thanks to you, neither are me and Andros." She shocked them with her statement, and rushed away from the scene. Cassie and Carlos were speechless. Carlos was about to ask her about what happened when another person arrived.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "She's not cheating on me." He angrily informed the duo, though he was so focused on Cassie, he didn't know Carlos was even there.
"I know. She just ripped into me." Cassie reported quietly to Andros; hoping to calm him down. She didn't know if she could take another fight. "I didn't know she would break up with you." She commented in disbelief as she looked down at her shoes, disgusted with herself for overreacting.
"Well she did." Andros declared. "And now you have to help me figure out a way to get her back." He commanded, as his anger slowly dissipated, replaced by sorrow. Carlos finally interjected, taking pity on the pair and he led them to the coffee shop to discuss the plan of action.
Ashley spent the last hour before she had to go to work wandering aimlessly through downtown Angel Grove. She was so caught up in her thoughts, she totally missed any of the sales going on around her. The sounds of laughter and the sights of couples totally depressed her as she made her way to the boutique. Hopefully work would keep her mind occupied for a few hours.
4 PM
As she pushed open the door she was ambushed by her co-workers, who were relieved to be leaving. "Hey Ash!" Tara called cheerfully as she quickly made her exit. Ashley went to wave but the bubbly red head was already out the door. She shook her head as she clocked in to begin her shift.
"Thanks for closing for me Ashley, I really appreciate it." Kari declared gratefully as she clocked out herself.
"No problem Kar. Have a great time on your date tonight. You better call me with all the details." She mock threatened her friend who was grinning from ear to ear.
"Better yet I'll tell you myself tomorrow. I switched with Andie to work tomorrow with you." Kari announced happily. Ashley grinned at her friend's antics. She was glad for her. But thinking of her friend's upcoming date reminded her of the events she had unsuccessful tried to forget. The grin faded as she recalled the ugly scene from the morning when she had broken up with Andros.
"Are you okay Ash?" Kari asked suddenly, sensing a difference in her mood, as Ashley stared off into space.
"Andros and I broke up this morning." She quietly confided in her co-worker as the two talked freely since there were no customers in the store.
"Oh Ash. I'm so sorry. I know you loved him." She consoled the distressed girl. "What happened?" Ashley explained the whole episode while Kari listened intently. "Do you still love him?" she gently inquired. Ashley could only nod her confirmation.
"How about I cancel my date, and after work you and I will go out and get totally plastered." Kari suggested, finally getting Ashley to crack a smile.
"It's alright Kar. You go and have a good time. I just want to be alone anyway." She confessed. Kari finally agreed to go on her date. As she was about to leave, she remembered what she had to tell Ashley. "Some lady was in here earlier looking for you." Ashley thinks nothing of it, as she is too preoccupied.
The day passes by slowly as few customers pass through the store. Ashley doesn't mind the loneliness; she keeps herself busy by folding clothes and making a new display for the front window.
7 PM
Ashley takes her salad from the refrigerator and sits down with her novel to enjoy a quiet dinner.
In the dark isolated parking lot behind the motel, the woman loads up her trunk with the necessary supplies. She goes over her list one more time. Satisfied, she closes the trunk and drives her car to the nearest gas station to fill up with gas. It's almost time for her to put her plan into action.
With darkness already arrived, she pulls her Honda accord onto an unpaved gravel road behind an abandoned junkyard and parks it. She waits until 8:45pm to leave the car. She pulled on a large hooded sweatshirt, and stuck an old baseball hat on her now blonde head. Throwing away her cigarette, she moves into position, lurking in the shadows as she awaits the girl who has ruined her life. She controls her breathing as to not alert anyone to the extra presence in the parking lot. She holds a brick in her left hand, ready to immobilize Ashley when the moment arises.
Ashley looked up with a start as the clock chimed nine times. Finally closing time, she thought with a small smile. Maybe I can go to bed and forget this terrible day." She decided hopefully as she locked the front door and switched the sign to closed. She locked the register and put the books in the safe. Turning off the lights, she slid her time card through the clock. 9:04PM it read as she put it back in her designated slot. Grabbing her purse she exited through the back door.
She didn't have to wait long. At 9:05 PM, Ashley left through the back exit to Nonchalance and headed unconcerned to her car. Shelley crept up on the unsuspecting girl, as Ashley put her keys in her door to open her Volkswagen, a strong blow to her head had her crumpling to the ground, completely unconscious. Shelley tossed the brick away and grabbed under Ashley's arms and pulled the girl away from her car and through the woods to where her car was waiting.
Shelley laid Ashley on the ground besides her car and tied her arms and feet. She placed a bandana over her eyes and one in her mouth to keep her quiet in case she awoke. And for extra measure, she injected Ashley with a sedative before laying her on the floor of the back of the car. Smirking to herself for a job well done, she threw a blanket over the lifeless girl and closed the door. Shelley hopped into the drivers seat and took off, beginning the journey to her final destination.
