Hey there…sorry for the long time, but I am so busy. Finals are coming and it will be about two weeks before anything else comes out! I have another story coming out immediately after this one ends, so watch out for it! It's called "Rewarding Christmas." Thank you for your reviews! Happy Holidays!
Read and enjoy,
-MC
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The sword was dead, limp and lifeless against its master's side. It was aware of nothing now, no personification, no traits that had resided previously in the mass of steel and bones were apparent now. The sword was simply a tool of destruction, life preservation and protection. Its power was in tune with two sources now, however, simultaneously drawing forth life and power through unconnected sources. In their joining, however, would come great joy and unsurpassable power. Yet, the sources were stubborn creatures, denying something that was there from the beginning. What could be done? The sword was finished. It was up to the sources now.
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Blood spattered on my chest and I vaguely registered it wasn't clothed. I smirked at the thought that Kagome could lick it up with her tongue later if I used a little of my power. THAT earned a shiver as I hacked into another demon bent on rutting MY Kagome. Inuyasha had been whimpering about some female demon that was somehow attracted to the fray of male demons since she was in heat and managed to pick the one demon trying to fight against the erectly idiotic youkais. She had somewhere along the line found a male who was more…ahem, ready for her attentions. Afterwards I simply left the battle, wanting to bath and cleanse myself from the stench of inferior youkai at my own home. Kagome would call me with her power later, I was sure. It was always better for a little break, to make her want me even more. Ahh, I sniffed as I flew home, she still was in heat.
What am I going to do? Is this just a deplorable mistake? What? Why am I even worried about this? He isn't coming, so that means that I can use my power whenever I want and nothing can happen like losing my virginity in some cave to a blinded by lust and power taiyoukai. Well, Kagome, there is nothing to be upset over now. So, just forget about everything, forget about the past couple of he squeezed my waist as he licked my lips weeks and everything that went on brushing his claws over my nipples he brazenly bit down on my neck during that time. Ha. Easier said than done.
Inuyasha found me still pondering in the cave a little while later.
"Sesshomaru's gone." He looked worse for wear as his clothes had numerous slash marks (most likely from claws) in them, and his hair was sticking up in numerous places. He had blood matted into his hair, clothes and even I could smell the stench from ten feet away. No wonder Sesshomaru left.
"I can see why," I muttered, knowing full well he would be able to hear me.
"He had the top of his kimono off…" he said, not looking at me, but somewhere along the cave, as if he didn't really care what he was saying or what I would say in response. He said it in that distracted way that made me think something else more drastic had happened than simply fighting and killing numerous youkai that had swarmed into camp last night. "You know, he lied, he lied, you know." He was rambling incoherently. What exactly did happen out there?
"Inuyasha, what's wrong?" At the sound of his name he brought his gaze back to me, amber eyes pierced right into my soul. They were lit with something I had never seen the like of before in his eyes; fire, both through anger and lust.
"He lied, don't you get it? Don't you understand?" He said, while grabbing my shoulders, bruising my arms as he brought me close to his chest. "He wasn't under the spell of your power or anything. He just went along with it because he wanted you; he wanted you as his mate! He wanted to keep you for himself and take you away from me! Don't you understand? You're mine, you've always been mine and he can't have you!" He dragged me even closer to his chest still. "Everything has made it so I could be with you! You came through the well and saw me first, you broke the jewel so you could be with me, you promised to be with me forever, and you fought and killed Kikyou and Naraku so we could be together. Everything that has happened is so that we could be together. Everything…" He broke off abruptly as he brought his gaze to my lips. He drew me closer, and I had to stop him.
"Inuyasha, of course he was under the curse! Why was he called from miles away when I used my power?"
"No! No! I saw him. When you had him pinned against the tree and you were…were…well, he looked at me. He knew what he was doing. He knew what he was doing, I tell you! And now, you sit here and defend him…do you, do you want him?" He whispered, his eyes pleading with me to answer. He seemed to give up on that idea and I could do nothing to stop him as he kissed me almost too sweetly, too gently, too…do I dare to think…lovingly? But that wasn't what was really on my mind. Was he right? Did Sesshomaru take advantage of the situation? How could he do that…to me? I thought that, well, I don't know what I thought but I thought he was…I don't know what I thought. How could I think that Sesshomaru was suddenly above being a man, of taking advantage or everything that was going on, of being better than I thought he was? Why would he suddenly change for me? There was no reason for him to do so. Absolutely no reason at all. Inuyasha continued to kiss me and I didn't really know what to do. I didn't want to think or be near any of the brothers right now, it honestly hurt more than words can say to be near them. Inuyasha had played with my heart since the beginning and Sesshomaru, with his beautiful body and writing ability made me want to kiss him senseless…well now it just made me want to remember that all men or demons are alike; they all lie when they want something. And sadly, I knew exactly what the brothers wanted. They wanted exactly what the youkai from the battle wanted from me, although they were getting it in a very roundabout and subtle way. Jerks. Pushing away from Inuyasha roughly I flew on my aura to the well and hopped inside, sealing it from the other side. Perhaps cold turkey was the best idea at the moment.
Sesshomaru paced around the castle after he cleansed himself, trying to get his head cleared. But nothing would work—all he could think about was how Kagome felt underneath him, kissing him, talking to him, commenting on his stories, just being her. Everything he touched and smelled in his home cried out for him to give it to her, to allow her to own, possess, change and keep forever while they lived together throughout the centuries. He wanted to live with her, have pups with her, allow her to help open him up to his feelings, everything. He wanted everything with her and nothing would stand in his way.
Sitting down to his desk in the study, Sesshomaru gave into the urge to write, allowing his one and only muse to wash over him in gentle waves as he imagined her scent and alluring figure in his mind's eye. Nothing could distract him now as he brought his pen down to the paper and then…
And then…
And then…
There was nothing. Nothing at all. He couldn't think or feel anything to write. He once again centered himself and let thoughts of Kagome run through his mind…
Blast, I thought, still nothing. I can't even begin to understand how I wrote anything in the first place. What am I doing to myself?
And then suddenly it hit me, out of nowhere, like the time Inuyasha destroyed my arm all those years ago, I realized why I couldn't write. I realized why when I used my acid claws in the fight and why when I used my aura to fly home Kagome never came to me. I realized that something happened even though I unsheathed the sword I kept at my side constantly. It felt powerful, like it never did before. It felt more powerful than the Tetsuiaga ever felt in my clutches. However there was nothing else that I could feel. It was like the power was there but the will of the sword was not. I didn't even want to think about what that meant to the sword. But to me, to me, it meant that our little "curse" was lifted. That we didn't have anything to call us to each other anymore. That if I wanted to see Kagome I didn't have an excuse anymore to come and invade her personal space or to be near her at all. I couldn't just stick around afterwards and just be near her; I couldn't do anything unless I went directly to her and told her my intentions. And because of our previous encounters we had been less…well…there was no way that I could put anything we did in a positive light that only proved my absolute good intentions with her, I was going to be met with her skepticism of the whole ordeal. If I could only write something then I know she would understand! I need her, want her, love her but unfortunately I don't deserve her. Could I really make her happy? Could I keep her satisfied in everything she wants and desires for eternity? Does she love me too?
Kami! What is she doing to me? I can't even think straight nonetheless function correctly. All I want to do is be with her and at this moment I can't think of anything that will accomplish that goal. Absolutely nothing.
Kagome muttered to herself as she went along to her chores around the shrine. Being home sometimes felt so awkward. Her room was just how she left it, everything in its place and untouched unless her family came in and wanted something particular. She had her bed covers on neatly with the bed made, her desk arranged, and her stuffed animals (every girl has stuffed animals, no matter how immortal or old, thank you!) in welcoming positions. Her mother, Ji-chan and Souta greeted her with fervor every time she graced their presence and came home. But it just wasn't the same. She didn't belong there anymore. It was amazing for her to be in the past as well. She had Kaede's hut and her mat there, her friends welcoming her back every time she felt it sufficient time spent in the future. She didn't seem to belong there either. The only place Kagome felt like she belonged was with her yellow knapsack. She lived out of that bag; it became her whole life since she was grabbed into the past. She kept everything she could possibly ever need and want in there, living modestly and it suited her. But then this whole curse thing had to go and mess everything up. It had to just make her feel something, a little something, well, okay perhaps more than a little something for the ever-sexy, seductive, sweet, endowed (in more ways than one) Sesshomaru. Why did he have to make her feel so…
I just don't know anymore. I want him. I want to be with him, to finally satisfy this unfinished business between us. I want to experience life with someone that I love, though. I want to spend eternity with one man (or demon, most likely) that will not do anything for me, but do anything for us. I want him to be, I don't know. Could, could Sesshomaru be the one? Could he potentially be the man that I want for the rest of my life? Or is it simply that I'm feeling this because life was just pulling us together it seemed, the swords, the Shikon, my power, his power, everything that we depend on seemed to be calling us towards each other. But does he feel anything for me at all? Kagome growled to herself. Idiot, you always do this. You did it with Inuyasha and now you're doing it with Sesshomaru. You are making yourself like someone; love someone perhaps who wouldn't ever return your feelings. This is absolutely and hilariously pathetic. Too bad no one is laughing…
And Inuyasha, everything he said, it felt as if he was delusional or something. He spoke as if hexed, as if it pained him to say these things and yet he said them anyway. I couldn't even think straight before he kissed me and after I was left even more confused. Everything seemed to be working to bring us together as well…but I had already literally "been there, done that" and I couldn't bring myself to do it again. I was hoping he wouldn't turn to me after the death of Kikyou, but I guess it was inevitable. Didn't men (or demons) know that when you were so obviously rebound it didn't bode well for their predicament? I mean, honestly, I don't want her sloppy seconds anymore. I want sloppy firsts, I want everything, I want someone who can just, accept me right without having Inuyasha's stupid emotional baggage. Unfortunately, Sesshomaru seemed to have his own brand of emotional baggage. What was my strange fascination with the dog brothers?
Inuyasha dragged his claws down a tree, shredding the bark to thin slices of wood. Splinters caught in his claws, blood dripped down on the wood while he continually ripped at the trees.
How could I have been so stupid? It was like I was drunk off her scent or something and all I could do was sit there and confess everything to her. She is mine and yet when I said it I couldn't help but see she didn't even think that way of me anymore. But this possession, this desire to protect her and be with her forever wasn't just feelings left over from Kikyou, were they? But, I guess I should really ask myself this: if Kikyou was alive, would I even be traveling with Kagome still?
Inuyasha sighed and howled into the night sky, unable to answer the question out loud but knew deep down in his heart the truth. The truth of the matter was that Kikyou had the previous claim on his heart. But to Kagome's credit he had long ago stopped comparing them, seeing her as Kagome and not a reincarnation. Kagome was so different from Kikyou, now it seemed ludicrous to even think to mistake or compare them. He laughed dryly when he remembered Kagome's face the first time she yelled at him, telling him her name in no uncertain terms and detailing how he should treat her. Nothing would ever be the same…
Sesshomaru left his study, gliding to his balcony and rested his hand on the rail. The wind whipped around his hair, bringing scents of his lands, his property, his tenants, his life. This is what he truly was working for, this dirt, this pathetic title, this honor and pride he had kept so close to his previously iced heart. And yet now, now he would throw it all away if he could see Kagome one more time and tell her how he felt without being afraid, concerned about her feelings, and the high possibility of rejection. A howl, a disheartened howl reached his ear, recognizing it as his brother's harsh bark of summoning. His brother was summoning him? For what reason? He shrugged, not caring, perhaps this was the chance I could use to make Kagome truly understand me and my feelings. Taking flight he allowed his heart to take him to Inuyasha's forest, unable to contain his nerves, something he never spent much thought on before her. He saw the hanyou sitting on the ground, looking dejected and alone, Kagome not in sight or sense of smell.
"Sesshomaru, she went back to the future. She went back without saying goodbye. I, I kissed her. But once again I do not measure up. Make her come back, Sesshomaru. Make her understand that we need her, that we need her more than anything. She can't hear it from me now, she needs you." The hanyou tilted his tear streaked face to Sesshomaru's, pleading with similar golden eyes for some type of response or consent. Sesshomaru's chest tightened, understanding what Inuyasha was doing. Inuyasha was giving up his woman—to his brother. He was relinquishing her.
The Western Lord jumped into the well without a word and returned back a few seconds after, grimacing.
"She has sealed herself in, dear brother, how do we proceed?" He asked, gritting his teeth, not enjoying having to ask his brother for help yet since he was giving up something he could at least relinquish a sliver of his pride for Kagome's sake. Inuyasha glanced at his brother through the curtain of his hair and laughed lightly.
"Now Sesshomaru, all we can do is wait…just wait." The hanyou patted a spot on the edge of the well to his brother and the Taiyoukai snubbed the offering. Shrugging his shoulders, Inuyasha turned his head to the side, escaping to his own thoughts for the duration of their vigil. After a few minutes Sesshomaru took a seat beside his brother and Inuyasha turned back to look at HIS brother close up for the first time in a long time. As dawn broke through the sky both brother's lips quirked up in a semi-smile, both reminiscing about different moments in the past, but pleased that for once, they were brought together mutually by someone they both loved.
