Chapter Four: Explanations

"Severus, could I speak with you?" Buffy asked when she'd finally caught up to the potions' professor.

"What is it?" he answered annoyed.

"I wanted to know about apparating and Albus isn't…"

"How did you know Dumbledore?" He knows that he's acting strangely, actually being interested in some young blonde. She is vastly mysterious and if there's one thing that Snape hates, it is not knowing his possible enemies.

"Giles knew him from before, before watcher's training and that whole Ripper/Ethan/Randall thing. He introduced me to Albus after… after Glory. They both thought I might need some time away from the others, but that was before the truth came out and Giles left to come here again. Then they thought I should come after defeating the First, but the girls needed training and I was still mourning Spike…" Buffy trailed off softly, lost in painful memories that were still too fresh in her mind.

Severus was lost among the names and times he knew nothing of, and it only frustrated him further that she became more of a mystery everytime she talked. His still didn't understand why Dumbledore saw it important to have her here. He didn't understand how she could possibly need to be here.

"Dumbledore mentioned that something happened recently…" even though he was curious, Severus refused at actually ask any more questions. Buffy'd thrown him off guard at first, causing him to drop his normally distant behavior.

"There was an apocalypse. We thought that once we destroyed Sunnydale, after we defeated the First, that it would all be over," she snorted in disgust at their ignorance. "Xander was still heartbroken about losing Anya and I wasn't far behind mourning Spike. Willow seemed to finally be getting over Tara with Kennedy's help. We had nowhere to go, so we went to L.A., to Angel. Everything was truly normal for a while, we were happy. I should have realized that it couldn't have lasted, but I hadn't been that happy in a long time; I didn't want it to end. Then Alecto showed up. She was three times worse than Glory. We weren't ready, not even close, but we still went. I don't remember anything except that when I looked up only three of the girls were standing and we were all covered in blood. Nobody else made it, not Willow, not Xander, not Giles. After that, there was nowhere else to go. I was lost without Giles' advice. I didn't know what to do without Angel. Without out the scooby gang I would've been gone a long time ago, what do I do when they're gone?" By now her voice was barely above a whisper, raspy from choking down the tears. "And then I come here, and I'm still a freak. I just want to fit in for once. I want to have someone else make all the decisions. I don't want to be responsible anymore."

Snape didn't know what to say to that. It didn't matter though, because she turned a moment later and stiffly walked back in the direction she came. Only the laughing in the classroom behind him pulled him from his stupor. Quite disturbed, and much more understanding, he headed off to potions.