Author's note: gee, it seems like I just posted. *shrugs* Well, no matter. Here's the next chapter. A bit more of a background for Tess and an intro for Logan. Don't worry though, the next chapter should focus mainly on Sands. ^_^ That's going to be fun.
Author's thanks at the end.
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Logan was quick to hustle Tessa's little group out of the airport and into a waiting taxi. She almost laughed at the description. This wasn't a taxi, it was a bright yellow minivan – but she didn't dispute it. The sooner Sands sat down, the better. He was looking unsteady on his feet again and the last thing she wanted was for him to collapse. He didn't like to appear weak in front of her – she didn't know what he'd do if his infirmities got the best of him in front of strangers. Strangers who he hadn't had time to judge or adjust to yet. Tess had dealt with one breakdown that day – she didn't need and couldn't handle another.
"Tía, I'm hungry."
"We'll get food soon, Alma, I promise." Tess dug an orange out of her bag. "Go on, get in the van." Alma did, and soon after squabbles broke out in the back seat. "Share with your brothers if they're hungry." The disagreement dissolved as Tina climbed into the back of the van to provide adult order to the back seats.
Tess sighed with relief – the woman was a godsend, she was sure. Now, if only Tina were able to help with Sands, Tess might consider taking a short break. But that was an impossible 'if'. "Sands?" Speaking of impossible, where had that man gotten to? "Sands?"
Unaware of Logan's look of surprise, Tess went in search of her patient. There he was, leaning against the back of the van, cigarette in hand. "Sands, it's time for us to go. I still want to make sure that you didn't do any damage to yourself earlier."
"Ah, earlier. There's something we're going to have a talk about, niña." Sands flicked some ash from his cigarette. "I don't like being left in the dark," he managed to contain a wry and self-deprecating laugh. "Especially about my own actions." He took another drag, trying to hold off another trip. The kids were getting rambunctious from being cooped up all day, and he wasn't sure he wanted to be in the same room with them, much less the same vehicle.
He heard footsteps approach him, and the van sway as someone else leaned against it. Tessa's voice was low, as if she didn't want her conversation to be overheard by anyone else. "I know how you feel, but I also know that you're too weak to keep on your feet at the moment. Admit it – that's why you're leaning against the van. I'll answer all your questions as best I can, but first I'd like to see us someplace safe . . . out of the open. I understand that you don't want to get in the van –"
He appreciated her discretion, but the feeling that he had forgotten something important overwhelmed that. "You understand too damn much." Sands dropped the cigarette. He had to keep this female in her place – at an arm's distance. "You'd better back off before you find yourself 'understanding' a hell of a lot more than you bargained for. Savvy?"
"Loud and clear, Will Robinson." He didn't believe her for a moment. Sands had come to understand that Tess was one of those people who'd do anything within their power for those under their protection. "Can we go now? The longer we wait, the louder the kids are going to get. I don't know about you," the tone of her voice made it clear she knew exactly what he was feeling, "but my head can't take too many more decibels." Her fingertips brushed the sleeve of his jacket. "Shall we?"
He wanted to jerk away from her, but he had the feeling that would have sent him to his knees. He'd ask her not to touch him, but that would give away too much of what he was thinking and feeling. Cursing her in his head all the while, Sands followed Tess back the doors of the van and allowed her to give him a hand in entering the vehicle.
What are you whining about? At least with her help you didn't bang your head on the ceiling.
Traitor, Sands thought as he felt Tessa slide in after him.
Realist. There was an arm brushing against his stomach. That's nice, isn't it?
"What are you doing, señorita?"
Tess blushed – she'd been trying so hard not to touch him. Still, she kept her voice quiet as she answered. Something about having all these other people around made her want to try to protect Sands, but she didn't know from what or why. All she knew was that . . . was that she wanted him to keep his dignity. Yes, that sounded good. "I know this was merely an oversight on your part, but I'd appreciate it if you'd wear your seatbelt. It sets a good example for the children." She settled the buckle in his hand and he heard the snap of her own seatbelt being fastened. With an air of extreme irritation, Sands did the same.
One thing that Tess had learned long ago was there was no arguing with Logan once he'd made up his mind. Well, of course you could argue – it'd just do you no good whatsoever. So when Logan had informed Tess during the ride from the airport that she and her little company would be staying in a condo owned by his firm for as long as they stayed in LA for "consulting and possible treatment," she hadn't argued. She didn't entirely like the idea of living off charity for as long as they might be in California, but she was too tired to argue and too tired to arrange for a hotel. Dinner had been settled in the same way – she'd simply been too tired to argue over his paying for dinner. It was nothing but pizza, but she still felt somewhat guilty over letting him foot the bill.
"I'll pay you back for that."
"T, how many times did you spring for pizza while we were at school? I think that I owe you more than a dinner." Tess smiled and shook her head. They were cleaning up from dinner, the kids thoroughly engrossed in the newly discovered Disney channel (despite the fact that Marcos was really the only one who fully understood what was being said), and Sands had gone outside to smoke.
Outside. Tess looked out the window that showed the back porch. Sands was only visible in the form of a black silhouette against the lights of the LA skyline. Her thoughts returned the man who's been at their center for over a week now. "If you can do what you say you can, I'll be the one in your debt." Somewhere in the house, a clock chimed the hour – nine o'clock. "Excuse me for a moment. It's time the kids were headed towards bed."
Logan watched her go, still amazed at the task she'd taken on herself. Taking in four young children, with all the other concerns she had in her life. Tessa was certainly something, and he was glad to have her back. He'd have to watch her, though, to make sure she didn't overdo anything. As her physician and her friend, of course. "I talked to Inge the other day," he called to the upstairs bathroom where Tess was supervising teeth-brushing.
"How is she? I haven't heard from her lately." Lately. I'm not sure I've heard from her more than five times since graduation.
"Didn't you hear?"
No. I haven't talked to her lately. I just said that. "Hear what?" Tess appeared at the railing that ran along the upstairs hallway.
"She got a job with some government agency about three years back. She's been so busy ever since that she's barely had time to e-mail me. She said that she'd been trying to e-mail you, but you never replied. It sent her into a huff, the way she was being ignored by her old roommate, but I explained that you were on the go in Mexico and didn't always have Internet access." Tess rolled her eyes – they both knew that she had a wireless connection. She simply hated checking her e-mail. Every time she went online she got distracted from whatever it was that she was trying to do. "She was interested to hear that I'd actually found someone crazy enough to listen to my ideas."
"Is that right?" Tess looked over her shoulder. "Just a moment. Minor emergency." A herd of water-splashed children appeared from the bathroom and disappeared into one of the bedrooms.
Fifteen minutes later Tess emerged, a baby in one arm. She trotted down the stairs and came into the kitchen to fix a bottle. "What is it you were saying?"
"Inge – she was amazed."
"That's right. What else did she say?"
"That she had some vacation time coming up in two months or so, and she thought she might come out for a visit. Especially if I manage to 'pull a rabbit out of my hat.' Her words, not mine."
"Where's she living now?"
"D.C."
"Oh. When you said government I assumed she'd be over in Atlanta or something, working for the CDC. Doesn't she specialize in the development and evolution of diseases? I could have sworn that's what she wrote her thesis on."
"Yeah. I was surprised too." The microwave dinged and Logan got up from the table to fetch the bottle for Tess. "But she seems to be enjoying her work."
"Well, that's Inge for you – says one thing then does the exact opposite."
Logan shrugged. "I'm thirty different people sometimes. One day you wake up and you're somebody else, nowhere near who you were before you went to sleep."
Tess shook her head, amazed at how quickly the old routine was picked up between them. Almost as if she'd never left. It was a good feeling. "I've never heard that one before. Who said it?"
"Umm . . . gimme a moment. Can't for the life of me remember his name. That one guy who was in that pirate movie this summer."
Tess blinked at the man, unable figure out what he was saying, then it clicked. "Johnny Depp?"
Logan nodded. "Yeah, that's the one."
"Well, that's a coincidence." Logan looked at her quizzically, but she just shook her head. She didn't want to get into the business of fake ID's and cartels and lying to airport security. She looked down and found that Lena had drifted off. Getting up from the table, she went to put her change down and then came back.
"God, I've missed you." Now that her arms were free, Tess gave her friend a hug, remembering just how nice it was to be able to let down her guard of normalcy around someone. Logan knew she was nuts, so she didn't have to hide the fact around him. Besides, he had a streak of insanity running through his own personality, so for the most part, he had no right to judge her at all.
"I hear you had a rough flight." He let her go to look into her eyes seriously. "That or you've taken up kickboxing again." Logan brushed her bruised eye. "Are you alright?"
Tess looked up at Logan quizzically. How'd he known about what had happened on the flight? "I'm fine. A little sore, and I've got a nice buzz going, but other than that I'm fine. How'd you know what happened?"
He shrugged. "I got a call. I'm afraid that I asked Tina to look out for you. I know she's done her share of looking out for me. I hope you don't mind."
"No, not at all. That woman is worth her weight in antibacterial salve." She put on an injured look when Logan laughed at her comparison. "Well, it's true. She totally took on looking after the kids so I could focus on Sands . . . ." Where is Sands? "Speaking of my recalcitrant patient, where is he?"
"He came in while you were with the kids and went into one of the downstairs bedrooms."
Tess nodded and got up. "I'm sorry to keep interrupting our conversation, but I really do need to go check on him. If I had a rough flight, then he just had the trip from hell. I'll be right back."
It wasn't hard to tell which room Sands had gone into. There were only two bedrooms on the ground floor, and only one had the door open and a light on. Sands had no need for light but much need for privacy, so she assumed he was in the one with the door shut. She knocked quietly, waiting for a reply. When none came, she knocked a bit louder. Still nothing. Tess hesitated for a moment, unsure whether she should go in or not. Sands had suffered constant intrusions on his solitude and seclusion in the past eight or nine days – once they'd reached the condo, he'd locked himself outside. Tess had made sure that he'd eaten, but other than that she'd left him alone.
But what if he did hurt himself earlier?
You just want to see him.
I want to make sure he's alright. The voice didn't answer and Tess picked up her courage and opened the door to the bedroom.
Light filtered in from one open window, the sound of cars rumbling faintly under the sound of moving grass. Tess looked around in the dark, trying to locate her patient, and found him facedown on the bed. He'd stripped off his shirt and changed into a pair of beat-up jeans. His back glowed sliver in the light of the setting moon. Tessa watched as his body slowly rose and fell with the rhythm of the deeply asleep. Well, perhaps an examination can wait until tomorrow. He was wearing his glasses, but Tess was unwilling to make the same mistake the stewardess had made – she'd let him keep them on.
Still, despite her decision to let her patient sleep, Tessa was reluctant to leave the room. There was something about people when they were asleep that made them seem safer. Let threatening. More inviting. Less guarded. I wonder who he is beneath all the layers of indifference, hostility, and tacky t-shirts. There must be something worthwhile, or Marcos wouldn't like him. She shook her head. I wonder why I care. Her voice and Sands stirred at the same time. She froze, wanting to avoid detection and her voice's sharp tongue. It was sure to bring this up later, and who knew was Sands would do if he found her lurking. He didn't mind lurking himself, but she got the feeling he hated to have anyone spy on him.
Moving slowly, Tess left the room, closing the door behind her.
When he was sure that he was alone, Sands sat up. Finally. Maybe now he'd get some answers.
"So, how much can you tell me of what you've been up to lately, Trouble?"
Tess rolled her eyes at the old nickname. "Gee, if you want a complete accounting, maybe we should move into the living room – this may take awhile." Tess grabbed her can of Lipton's Brisk Ice Tea, and went and seated herself in an overstuffed armchair. Logan followed and sat across from her on the sofa, lounging across the cushions. Tessa noticed how he'd grown into his looks – he'd always been a good-looking guy, but now he seemed more comfortable inside his own skin. "How's Jessica?"
"T–"
"I don't want to talk about it, Logan. I've already told you what I can. There's parts of my life that I just can't share, though, for good reasons. I'm here – that's enough for me. Let it be enough for you."
"Doesn't that ever get tiring, Teresa? Don't you ever wish that you could actually talk to someone about all the things you hold back? That's what friends are there to listen to." What I'm here to listen to.
"Logan –"
"How do you know you're not fearing something that doesn't even exist?" he demanded.
Tess stared at him for a moment before her eyes lost focus, as if she were seeing something other than the room she was in. "We make the dragons as we make the gods, because we need them, because somewhere deep in out hearts, we recognize that a world without them is not worth living in. No, I would not want to live in a world without dragons, as I would not want to live in a world without magic, for that is a world without mystery, and that is a world without faith."
"Very impressive. What is that supposed to mean at the moment?"
Logan watched as her eyes focused on him once again. "Don't you ever give up? Can't you tell when things are complicated"
"No. It's one of my many charms. And things are only as complicated as you let them be. Answer the question please."
Tess thought for a moment. "What that means for me . . . at the moment at least . . . is that . . . ." She wasn't good at putting her thoughts into words. The two just didn't mesh well. That's why she used other people's words. "It means . . . that . . . for so long I've held what was bad in my world just as close as I held the few things that were good. And despite the fact that . . . that I was often – and am still – surrounded by dragons, I don't know what my life would be like without them, because they've motivated me for so long. But now my dragons are dead and I have the care of a wounded knight and four children, but I don't know were I'm supposed to find my motivation now. My life is changing, and seemingly for the better, and I don't know how to handle that." She sighed and rubbed her eyes. "I'm so used to running headlong through the dark, that now that there's light around me again, I don't know what to do with it. 'The darkness that surrounds us cannot hurt us. It is the darkness of your own heart you should fear.' Maybe that's it. Maybe now that I have a moment to stand still, I see all that can go wrong inside myself, and I doubt the wisdom of the choices I've made."
"Anything I've ever done that ultimately was worthwhile initially scared me to death."
"I don't think stealing the pants of every member of the football team applies at this instance."
"Hey, I'm not the one who said that."
"Who did then?"
"I don't know, but it was on that quote-a-day calendar you gave me for graduation."
Tess laughed, able to let go of her musings for the time being. "You still have that thing?"
"Yep. It has an honored place on my desk and all my colleagues and patients wonder why I'm still using a calendar from 1996."
"What do you tell them?"
"I tell them that the love of my life, the woman who broke my heart by leaving, gave it to me on our anniversary."
"Do you now?"
"Would I lie to you, T?"
"Yes. But I'll choose to ignore that fact. How's Jessica? I seem to remember asking you that awhile back now."
"Oh, she's doing alright . . . for a girl."
"She'd kick your but back to your undergrad days if she heard you say that."
"Nah, she'd just tell Mom and then let her handle it."
"The women of your family are very outspoken, aren't they?"
"Why are you asking me? You've met them. Although I will admit that Jess isn't nearly as bad as Mom yet. It's only a matter of time before my twin gives into it though."
"Into what?"
"Constant PMS." Tess broke out laughing. The sound reached Sands where he was sitting in the darkened kitchen. He'd never heard that amount of freedom in his companion's voice before and he realized how guarded she was around him. "I didn't say that, Dad did." Again the laughter.
Smart girl to be on the look-out around you. She must know a predator when she sees one.
Yes . . . smart girl. That threw a whole new monkey wrench into things. There was no telling how much she assumed or knew. He'd have to get her to answer some questions. Soon. Sands rubbed the back of his neck and then paid attention as the two friends started talking again.
"So, your flight . . . ."
"Oh my god. I don't even know what to tell you about our flight." Sands heard the weariness return to Tessa's voice. "Things started going wrong from the beginning. I don't even know what I can tell you without telling everything, and I don't want to tell another's story, so by all rights Sands' should be here to tell what he feels comfortable with before I say what I think is safe to be said –"
"Relax. I'm not here to interrogate you. Why don't we just start with Sands. Does he have a first name?"
"Most likely. I don't know what it is, though." Tess took a drink of her iced tea. "The thing you have to realize about Sands is he plays things very close to the vest. I don't know if he's always been that way, or if it's a recent development due to the nature of how he gained his injuries. My gut tells me hat this is somewhat recent, or at least an exaggeration of a previous personality trait."
"How did he get his injuries?"
"As far as I can tell, his eyes were . . . removed by rather primitive means." She swallowed, trying to keep her voice above a whisper. This was a gruesome topic that by all rights, should be explained by someone else. "And umm . . . as I said on the phone, the procedure wasn't entirely finished before he was released."
"Released from a hospital?"
"No."
"From where then? There's relatively few places that can –" She could tell that Logan was having a hard time digesting everything. He was used to the civility of the States – he'd never dealt with a cartel in his life. The closet thing the US had to compare was the mob, and there were relatively few mobs in LA.
"I have a good idea of the conditions it was done in, and a better idea of who did it." Tess gave a weak smile. "I think that our patient . . . your patient now . . . I think he got on the wrong side of a cartel."
"As in a drug cartel?"
"Yeah, as in a drug cartel." There was a look of shock on her friend's face. "I can assure you that it's not all that unusual as you get farther south of the border."
"What have you gotten tangled up in, Teresa?" Logan didn't like the depth of conviction in her voice.
"Nothing. It's what I've gotten free of that should concern you."
"And what's that?"
"A very different
way of life. But anyway, that's why I've
brought Sands to you. As for what
happened on the plane . . . I think your stewardesses need to be briefed on how
far is too far where hospitality is concerned."
"You're not making sense."
"One of your flight attendants took his glasses off, giving them both a rude awakening. I can only assume that she was too rough in her shock, and that she managed to hurt him somehow. He lost track of where he was, and he tried . . . I think he was trying to escape, but not the plane."
"And the black eye?" Sands raised his eyebrows – he hadn't known that she was hurt.
"A lesson in what can happen when one tries to stabilize an unstable mind. Good thing it's not a common occurrence – otherwise I'd be black and blue all over all the time." Tess shrugged. "He thought I was someone else and he tried to make me let go of him. I ducked or avoided most of the blows, but his fist did manage to catch the corner of my eye. Like you said, I've had worse when I was taking that kickboxing course." Leaning her head back onto the back of the chair, she said, "I'm fine."
"That's not what Tina said."
"Logan –"
"She said that you were talking to yourself and that you had to give yourself a booster shot." Sands' ears perked up at that. This line of conversation could end up being ever so informative. "Tina also said that you looked like you hadn't gotten sleep in days. Now that I see you myself, I think she was being kind. You're wearing yourself ragged, and you can't do that, T. You more than anyone should know the repercussions of sleep deprivation on your psyche."
"I do. I know every consequence, every possibility, every 'if' inside and out. You make it sound as if I've been careless. Well . . . maybe I have. But it was either I get enough sleep, or my charges suffer for it. I had to tend a man who by all rights should have bled to death, and I still can't figure out why he didn't. I took in four children left as orphans due to a greed for power and territory. I got shot – twice. And I've been having flashbacks like you wouldn't believe. But I'm still in control. I've gotten everyone to safety while keeping their health intact, and now that I'm here, I can take things a bit easier. I hid our tracks well – we'll be safe for a few weeks. Long enough for you to help Sands."
"He's important to you, isn't he Tessa?" Logan's voice was quiet, but it still caused shock ripples to move through Tessa's body.
"Of course he's important. He's my patient. All my patients are important."
"There's more to it than that, T. Remember, we did our internship together. I've seen you with your patients before. You were professional yet warm with them. I've never yet seen you actually worry over someone in your care. What is it about this man that makes you lose that cool head of yours?"
How do I answer that? "He's the last one."
"The last one of what?"
"The last patient. He's the last that I will ever see under my care."
"What do you mean? You're still a doctor, T. There will be other patients."
"No, there won't. You don't understand. Remember how I graduated second in our class?"
"Yeah. Inge was first, you were second, Jess was third, and I was fourth. It was a dark day that saw three women come in ahead of me, but –"
Tess waved a hand, dismissing the familiar lament. "Yes, I've heard this complaint before. Remember how you all were looking over job offers and discussing benefits while I sat and read?"
"What does this have to do with anything, T?
"Remember what I said? That I already had a job lined up? You were all so amazed that I'd made up my mind so quickly. What you didn't know was that I had no other offers. Just the one with my family. I came in second in the class, but no one wanted to hire me. I was too big a risk. The level of stress that would be placed on me, they said, would be too much. I'd never take it. I'd be a danger to myself and my patients. So I went back to Mexico, stayed with my family for a year, and then ran away. I've taken in patients here and there, but it's time for me to quit. I'm glad that I can turn Sands over to you."
"Tessa –"
"It's true, Logan. We both know that. Regular practice in a hospital somewhere would have broken me years ago."
Her friend was silent for a moment before asking, "So what are you going to do now?"
"I don't know. Maybe find a teaching position at community college or something. They're always on the lookout for good teachers, and seeing as I was second in my class from Harvard med, it shouldn't be too hard to find a job." Tess stood up and stretched. "Of course, anything that I do will have to wait until I know what will happen with Sands. I won't leave him completely friendless. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I should head for bed."
"I won't dream of keeping you from your beauty sleep, Trouble." Logan stood up as well and walked towards the front door at Tessa's side. "I was thinking that tomorrow Tina could take the kids off your hands again, and you could spend the day sleeping."
"That's nice, but it's not really her job."
"Well, actually, it kinda is. Tina isn't a flight attendant, she's my head nurse and personal assistant. She's completely amazing."
"You're such a jerk, Logan. Why didn't you tell me that before?"
"You didn't need to know. Anyway, she'll let herself in tomorrow, so don't worry about being up."
"Logan –"
"Doctor's orders, Ms. Adame. Sleep, or I'll prescribe a sleep-aid for you." He kissed the top of her head. "Go to bed, and I don't want to hear from you before two o'clock tomorrow afternoon. Understood?"
"Yes."
"Ok, then. I'll see you tomorrow." Logan opened the door and left, leaving Tess to stand in the middle of her borrowed living room alone and exhausted. Funny, she hadn't been this tired a few minutes ago.
"Have a nice chat, niña?"
Normally someone sneaking up behind her would startle her, but all Tess could work up was a extreme case of underdeveloped irritation. "What is it Sands?"
"Oh, nothing much. I just have a few questions about your conversation, señorita."
That superior tone could get really annoying. Tess picked up her drink and noticed something around the rim, inside the gutter that ran around the edge. Some liquid must have gotten into it and then dried. But why would it leave a white residue? She knew that should concern her, but she couldn't work up enough energy to worry about it. She yawned. Understanding hit.
"Are you listening to me, chiquita?"
"Yes, but I think your answers are going to have to wait."
"And why's that? You have a pressing engagement?"
"Something like that. I need to lie down before I collapse."
"Why would you
collapse?"
"Because I'm relatively sure that Logan
put some sleeping pills in my drink. The
man always has to take things into his own hands. It's an annoying habit." Tess weaved down the hall with Sands
following behind her. She was somewhat
surprised that he was following her,
but she wasn't going to argue. She
couldn't argue, not through the yawns that were coming fast and furious
now. She switched off the light in her
room and took off her pants. Crawling
under the blankets, she murmured, "Don't be surprised if I'm not up early in
the morning, and don't shoot anyone you might hear moving around. I don't know if you heard this part of the
conversation, but Tina will be coming by for the children." Whether Sands answered her or not, Tess
didn't know. Sleep claimed her hard and
fast, leaving her without dreams, something she was grateful for.
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Quotes: Quotes this chapter are provided for you from – Lost in Space, Johnny Depp, J.R.R. Tolkien, and Silvetris.
Author's Thanks: many thanks, much gratitude, and more appreciation than I can explain goes to Ashley (my babysitting beta), Adrejon, Scarlett Burns, kiare, Blank, TaraRose, Merrie, and Sue. There was a lack of new reviewers this chapter, so I find myself appreciating all of you all the more. ^_^ This really is a story written for those who keep reviewing and sending in feedback (and quotes?) and bothering me for more chapters. The new reviewers have always been more of a 'wow – there's more than ___ people reading this.' But you guys are the ones that inspire me. Thanks without end.
Sara
