Okay, I originally had this chapter written out as if Gabby had miraculously recovered from her rape. Guess what, folks? It doesn't work like that. I haven't a clue what kind of 'baggage' sometimes hangs on around the neck of a victim, but I can only surmise that when and if they ever find 'the one' to be with forever, that sometimes in some large or small way their awful experience might affect that relationship. I can only imagine the terrible fallout with that.
I have shared with some Fanfiction writers about my dilemma with putting everything up that I've written so far. I've discovered, however, that my real obstacle was the way in which I've ignored a very large problem with how Gabby might be coping with her 'Jason experience' in contrast with her impending marriage to Seth. She is not a super mutant hybrid human/reptile. She is flesh and blood and all too 'human' in how she reacts to things. Yes, Gabby is stronger emotionally than she was in the beginning. But she is still taking that 'walk to full ninja' one step at a time. Consequently, it is safe to say that her reaction to what happened to her regarding Jason would affect her deeply and affect how she anticipates her impending marriage to Seth.
I wasn't sure if I could approach the topic of 'sex' within the confines of how I rated this fic and, as you know, I have a hard enough time adding profanity to my story. So, with much trepidation and doing my up most and bestest, I will delve into her world of trying to sort out her feelings. Obviously, Jason will have had a severe impact on her. I will not go into gritty details, but will allow for innuendos. Maybe, here, my PG13 rating will be justified. Hopefully, I can do this and still remain safely within a PG! I'd much prefer that anyway since I tend to blush easily as it is!
Also, for those of you who prefer a much more 'active' storyline - my apologies to this part of the fic that seems to just be 'moving along slowly'. I do have an action chapter or two coming up that will hopefully appease the 'Jackie Chan' addicts (like myself!). Considering my lack of knowledge of martial arts, I've been a little hesitant to venture into that territory. My desire is to 'just get over it' and - as Raph would say, "Just do it!" Thanks for your patience! :0)
Please review and offer any insights or suggestions. Thanks a million! - Rene'
*******
The moment Gaele stepped through the front door on Wednesday afternoon she was met by her family with a barrage of hugs. Once she disengaged herself from them, she did likewise with Gabby and grabbed her in a firm embrace; whispering to her, "Couldn't imagine ever having a sister-in-law, so this is such a big deal to me!" she gushed, smiling so big she reminded Gabby of Mike.
Gaele looked over at Seth and then hugged him as well. "You better be nice to her – or I'll pound you into the ground!" she teased.
Seth just shook his head, laughing, cuffing the top of his sister's head affectionately.
Rahab and Mike then sequestered themselves into the kitchen, preparing as much of the food for the next day as they could. The rest of the family went into the adjoining family room to visit with their newly arriving member.
While everyone was getting reacquainted, Leo went out and brought the professor in from the guest house. The elderly man was greeted warmly to join in with the melee of conversations that seemed to nearly raise the roof at times with its volume. Perry sat quietly and was occasionally drawn into the midst of a discussion, but mostly he observed and listened.
The professor sat next to Gabby, who sat next to Seth, whose hand she held onto tightly.
"Are you feeling okay, Gabs?" Seth asked, noticing the firm grip she was giving him.
"Yeah, it's just a bit noisy for me tonight, that's all." she smiled sheepishly.
"More so than normal? Well, I guess it would be with Gaele here. I'm sure after dinner, things will calm down. But, it's not every Thanksgiving we have the whole family here at the same time!" he explained.
She leaned into him and said softly, "I miss the quiet of the forest." and she looked at him deeply.
"Ah, Gabs, not here!" he said with his eyes as he shook his head. "Not with this crowd, okay?" He smiled at her lovingly.
She nodded, realizing he was right. Gabby observed the room a little self consciously. If any of the others had noticed what transpired a moment before between her and Seth, they didn't let on.
Gabby thought momentarily about Jason, about what he had done to her. She recoiled just a little from the flashback.
Seth sensed her mood-change and so he gave her a reassuring squeeze of her hand. He looked at her and smiled, not really sure what had caused her to react the way she just did.
Gabby smiled back at him and shrugged a little.
"Are you okay?" he asked, furrowing his brow.
"Yeah, just – sort of had a flashback is all. I'll be fine." She replied softly as she smiled a little.
Seth put his arm around her shoulders and brought her up close against his side as they sat on the couch. All he could say was, "I love you, Gabby. You'll be okay – I promise!"
But, Gabby wasn't okay. She was bothered by a great burden. She worried about what kind of effect Jason would have on her and Seth's marriage. Even though the boy was out of the country and no longer a threat, she was afraid her awful experience would influence her response to the one who was embracing her now.
While Gabby was out in the forest with Seth yesterday, she felt so safe. He gave her a sense of peace and security that overshadowed what Jason had done to her. Had they stayed out there any longer and if Seth had been willing, Gabby would have given herself to him. And yet now she saw that as a contradiction to what she was currently feeling. It came upon her so suddenly. She just couldn't put aside Jason's intrusive and intimate attack. It frightened her that, come her wedding night, she would reject Seth completely because of it.
Thinking back to when Seth had first kissed her down in the gym, Gabby had to smile a little. Up until that moment so many weeks ago, she had never felt anything like what she did when their lips met. The force of his embrace and the impact it had on Gabby's whole composure sent her head into a dizzy spin. Feelings she never knew she had spilled out and seemed determine to drown her.
It took a long talk later on with Rahab to finally understand what was happening to her. Rahab had obviously engaged in similar discussions before; she seemed to know exactly what Gabby was going through and what to say to her.
Once the girl had realized what infatuation was and how it contrasted with love, she wanted to explore the options. But, Seth was so respectful towards her and it was obvious he would not respond to her any other way that Gabby let it go. Of course, when he was then sent back to Japan it pretty much forced the issue anyway.
But, once Gabby became entrenched with reading his Bible, she realized that such intimate relationships truly needed the commitment that marriage brought. She soon looked forward to that day.
And, then Jason had to go and ruin it all.
Up until that fateful moment, Gabby didn't have a clue. Not one. The professor had never told her about the facts of life simply because he – well – never did. Maybe it was because he saw her as so unique that he believed she would probably remain single her entire life.
It's funny how things work out.
Now, with the knowledge that Jason so rudely forced upon her, Gabby felt like she was wrestling with a hideous monster – and it was winning! Maybe she needed another 'long talk' with Rahab.
Maybe after dinner!
******
Rahab fixed a light meal to offset the much larger one that would be served the following day. While everyone was eating, she asked when Cassandra would be arriving on Thursday.
"About noon, I think." Don replied. "I gave her directions this morning when I called her."
"How is she feeling?" Rahab asked, aware of the concussion the woman had sustained.
"Better," Leo responded. "I went down there around noon yesterday to check on her to make sure she wasn't putting on a brave front."
"Oh, you went into Carmel?" Gabby asked disappointedly, realizing she missed seeing her friend again.
"I tried to find you, but Don said you took off with Seth. Otherwise....." he commented, giving his son a particularly amused but stern look. Leo never alluded to having any suspicions where his son was with Gabby. But, just the same, Seth felt the sting of warning in the look his father gave him.
Later, as everyone settled in for the evening with either some television or more conversation, Leo gave Seth a familiar glance. He then went down into the gym. Momentarily after that, Seth followed him, although quite reluctantly. He was pretty sure he knew the kind of lecture that was to come.
Gabby saw Seth disappear down the gymnasium stairs and figured now was as good a time as any to talk with Rahab. She went to go find her.
******
"What were you doing in the forest alone with Gabby, Seth?" His father asked as he folded his arms across his plastron.
"We were walking; getting away from the bustle of the house. That's it." his son replied to his father's inquiry.
"Oh, really? You were gone an awfully long time, Seth, from what Don said. How far did you walk?" Leo asked.
"No disrespect, Father, but why all the questions?" his son asked.
"I'm just concerned with your relationship with Gabby right now. Your wedding is not too far away and a lot of young people tend to jump the gun on these matters!" Leo explained.
"I would not dishonor Gabby in that way, especially after what that creep did to her. It's not even how I think!" Seth said defensively, feeling a bit resentful that his own father would even suggest such a thought.
"I'm not worried about you dishonoring Gabby." Leo's reply surprised him, "I trust that you would never put her in a position to take advantage of her!"
Seth was puzzled as he asked, "Then why this talk?"
"I'm worried," Leo replied, "that you would cause her to dishonor herself with desires that, due to your commitment to abstinence, she cannot have fulfilled! I can only encourage you to be careful with where you spend solitude with Gabby."
"We're going to have those feelings anyway, Father. It's what you yourself even told me not too long ago!" Seth stated firmly.
"Yes, that is true. But, to put her in temptation's way by being out of sight of the family will make it harder for her – and for you – to resist." Leo implored.
Seth sighed and then nodded, "I understand. Didn't really think about that; I've been so mindful of me and how I am around her that I didn't think about Gabby's reaction."
"Seth, she's gone through a horrific experience." Leo explained, "You need to be mindful that Jason was her first sexual encounter and it was horrific."
He saw his son glower at the mention of the boy's name. Leo responded gravely, "Look, it's a fact and you better accept it right now! The best thing for you to do is to work your anger out before the marriage takes place! Otherwise, Gabby will pick up on it and then that can put a wedge between you and her."
Leo looked sternly at his son before continuing softly, "Gabby will be looking and needing the strength that you possess to get her through this. Obviously, along the way, she will be having flashbacks and fears and nightmares. How you react to them will determine her recovery. You will be treading with her where Jason has already ventured. Extreme sensitivity on your part is not an option, but a necessity. As far as spending time alone with her like you did yesterday, be mindful that your wedding day is only a month from now. Be careful you do not frustrate her." his father said pointedly. "You, least of all, should not have to be told this!"
And that was the end of the discussion. Leo left the gym, allowing Seth to remain behind to ponder his words of instruction.
*****
"Rahab? Can I talk with you, please – if you have time?" Gabby asked as she watched her aunt come down the stairs.
"Sure, Gabby. Where'd you like to talk?" her aunt asked.
"Hmmm…my room, maybe?" the girl offered quietly.
Once they were in Gabby's room and sitting on the bed, Rahab asked, "So, what'd you want to talk about?"
Gabby was silent for a moment. She looked down at her hands that were resting in her lap. She blushed just a little.
Then, she said softly, "Seth… and … Jason."
"Ah, yes, I wondered if maybe there was going to be some ugly fallout about that. I've been wanting to talk with you about it but decided to wait until you came to me." Rahab was quiet for a moment, watching her niece and wondering how quickly to get into it.
Finally, after Gabby seemed to leave the floor open for discussion, Rahab offered, "Marriage is a wonderful relationship Gabby. You choose marriage, it doesn't choose you. Who you marry is a choice thing, usually, although in some countries and cultures the families choose the life-mate for their children. Seth chose you and you accepted! He loves you very much; you do know that don't you?"
Gabby nodded, but then she remarked, "But, I didn't choose – Jason!" and she started to cry.
Rahab held her tightly and said in a strangled whisper, trying to keep her own emotions under control, "Yes, I know that, honey. I'm so sorry about that. If any of us could change what happened to you we would. We'd take it upon ourselves, in fact. But, it did happen and you've been doing very well in coping."
"But I'm afraid … I-I'll reject Seth because of what Jason did!" Gabby wailed. She leaned heavily into Rahab for support, shuddering with each sob.
Her aunt sighed compassionately, "I'm sure he's aware of this fact, Gabby. Seth is far more intuitive than even his father; just to let you know. " Rahab paused as she tried to find the right words. Not ever having gone through what her niece did had her at a disadvantage. She was afraid of minimizing what Gabby had gone through; afraid she would miss a point and have that come back to haunt her.
All Rahab could say was, "I will tell you this much, intimacy with Seth will be far different than it was with Jason. Seth will not force himself on you. He will not insult you or dishonor you, threaten you, or hurt you. And if there's one thing I know about my son – when he's not trying to get over jet lag – is he's patient, very patient! In that he has taken after his father."
Rahab kissed Gabby's cheek affectionately. "Besides my dear – and take it from one who knows – ninja love is the best!" and she giggled, causing Gabby to hiccup as she giggled in return.
I have shared with some Fanfiction writers about my dilemma with putting everything up that I've written so far. I've discovered, however, that my real obstacle was the way in which I've ignored a very large problem with how Gabby might be coping with her 'Jason experience' in contrast with her impending marriage to Seth. She is not a super mutant hybrid human/reptile. She is flesh and blood and all too 'human' in how she reacts to things. Yes, Gabby is stronger emotionally than she was in the beginning. But she is still taking that 'walk to full ninja' one step at a time. Consequently, it is safe to say that her reaction to what happened to her regarding Jason would affect her deeply and affect how she anticipates her impending marriage to Seth.
I wasn't sure if I could approach the topic of 'sex' within the confines of how I rated this fic and, as you know, I have a hard enough time adding profanity to my story. So, with much trepidation and doing my up most and bestest, I will delve into her world of trying to sort out her feelings. Obviously, Jason will have had a severe impact on her. I will not go into gritty details, but will allow for innuendos. Maybe, here, my PG13 rating will be justified. Hopefully, I can do this and still remain safely within a PG! I'd much prefer that anyway since I tend to blush easily as it is!
Also, for those of you who prefer a much more 'active' storyline - my apologies to this part of the fic that seems to just be 'moving along slowly'. I do have an action chapter or two coming up that will hopefully appease the 'Jackie Chan' addicts (like myself!). Considering my lack of knowledge of martial arts, I've been a little hesitant to venture into that territory. My desire is to 'just get over it' and - as Raph would say, "Just do it!" Thanks for your patience! :0)
Please review and offer any insights or suggestions. Thanks a million! - Rene'
*******
The moment Gaele stepped through the front door on Wednesday afternoon she was met by her family with a barrage of hugs. Once she disengaged herself from them, she did likewise with Gabby and grabbed her in a firm embrace; whispering to her, "Couldn't imagine ever having a sister-in-law, so this is such a big deal to me!" she gushed, smiling so big she reminded Gabby of Mike.
Gaele looked over at Seth and then hugged him as well. "You better be nice to her – or I'll pound you into the ground!" she teased.
Seth just shook his head, laughing, cuffing the top of his sister's head affectionately.
Rahab and Mike then sequestered themselves into the kitchen, preparing as much of the food for the next day as they could. The rest of the family went into the adjoining family room to visit with their newly arriving member.
While everyone was getting reacquainted, Leo went out and brought the professor in from the guest house. The elderly man was greeted warmly to join in with the melee of conversations that seemed to nearly raise the roof at times with its volume. Perry sat quietly and was occasionally drawn into the midst of a discussion, but mostly he observed and listened.
The professor sat next to Gabby, who sat next to Seth, whose hand she held onto tightly.
"Are you feeling okay, Gabs?" Seth asked, noticing the firm grip she was giving him.
"Yeah, it's just a bit noisy for me tonight, that's all." she smiled sheepishly.
"More so than normal? Well, I guess it would be with Gaele here. I'm sure after dinner, things will calm down. But, it's not every Thanksgiving we have the whole family here at the same time!" he explained.
She leaned into him and said softly, "I miss the quiet of the forest." and she looked at him deeply.
"Ah, Gabs, not here!" he said with his eyes as he shook his head. "Not with this crowd, okay?" He smiled at her lovingly.
She nodded, realizing he was right. Gabby observed the room a little self consciously. If any of the others had noticed what transpired a moment before between her and Seth, they didn't let on.
Gabby thought momentarily about Jason, about what he had done to her. She recoiled just a little from the flashback.
Seth sensed her mood-change and so he gave her a reassuring squeeze of her hand. He looked at her and smiled, not really sure what had caused her to react the way she just did.
Gabby smiled back at him and shrugged a little.
"Are you okay?" he asked, furrowing his brow.
"Yeah, just – sort of had a flashback is all. I'll be fine." She replied softly as she smiled a little.
Seth put his arm around her shoulders and brought her up close against his side as they sat on the couch. All he could say was, "I love you, Gabby. You'll be okay – I promise!"
But, Gabby wasn't okay. She was bothered by a great burden. She worried about what kind of effect Jason would have on her and Seth's marriage. Even though the boy was out of the country and no longer a threat, she was afraid her awful experience would influence her response to the one who was embracing her now.
While Gabby was out in the forest with Seth yesterday, she felt so safe. He gave her a sense of peace and security that overshadowed what Jason had done to her. Had they stayed out there any longer and if Seth had been willing, Gabby would have given herself to him. And yet now she saw that as a contradiction to what she was currently feeling. It came upon her so suddenly. She just couldn't put aside Jason's intrusive and intimate attack. It frightened her that, come her wedding night, she would reject Seth completely because of it.
Thinking back to when Seth had first kissed her down in the gym, Gabby had to smile a little. Up until that moment so many weeks ago, she had never felt anything like what she did when their lips met. The force of his embrace and the impact it had on Gabby's whole composure sent her head into a dizzy spin. Feelings she never knew she had spilled out and seemed determine to drown her.
It took a long talk later on with Rahab to finally understand what was happening to her. Rahab had obviously engaged in similar discussions before; she seemed to know exactly what Gabby was going through and what to say to her.
Once the girl had realized what infatuation was and how it contrasted with love, she wanted to explore the options. But, Seth was so respectful towards her and it was obvious he would not respond to her any other way that Gabby let it go. Of course, when he was then sent back to Japan it pretty much forced the issue anyway.
But, once Gabby became entrenched with reading his Bible, she realized that such intimate relationships truly needed the commitment that marriage brought. She soon looked forward to that day.
And, then Jason had to go and ruin it all.
Up until that fateful moment, Gabby didn't have a clue. Not one. The professor had never told her about the facts of life simply because he – well – never did. Maybe it was because he saw her as so unique that he believed she would probably remain single her entire life.
It's funny how things work out.
Now, with the knowledge that Jason so rudely forced upon her, Gabby felt like she was wrestling with a hideous monster – and it was winning! Maybe she needed another 'long talk' with Rahab.
Maybe after dinner!
******
Rahab fixed a light meal to offset the much larger one that would be served the following day. While everyone was eating, she asked when Cassandra would be arriving on Thursday.
"About noon, I think." Don replied. "I gave her directions this morning when I called her."
"How is she feeling?" Rahab asked, aware of the concussion the woman had sustained.
"Better," Leo responded. "I went down there around noon yesterday to check on her to make sure she wasn't putting on a brave front."
"Oh, you went into Carmel?" Gabby asked disappointedly, realizing she missed seeing her friend again.
"I tried to find you, but Don said you took off with Seth. Otherwise....." he commented, giving his son a particularly amused but stern look. Leo never alluded to having any suspicions where his son was with Gabby. But, just the same, Seth felt the sting of warning in the look his father gave him.
Later, as everyone settled in for the evening with either some television or more conversation, Leo gave Seth a familiar glance. He then went down into the gym. Momentarily after that, Seth followed him, although quite reluctantly. He was pretty sure he knew the kind of lecture that was to come.
Gabby saw Seth disappear down the gymnasium stairs and figured now was as good a time as any to talk with Rahab. She went to go find her.
******
"What were you doing in the forest alone with Gabby, Seth?" His father asked as he folded his arms across his plastron.
"We were walking; getting away from the bustle of the house. That's it." his son replied to his father's inquiry.
"Oh, really? You were gone an awfully long time, Seth, from what Don said. How far did you walk?" Leo asked.
"No disrespect, Father, but why all the questions?" his son asked.
"I'm just concerned with your relationship with Gabby right now. Your wedding is not too far away and a lot of young people tend to jump the gun on these matters!" Leo explained.
"I would not dishonor Gabby in that way, especially after what that creep did to her. It's not even how I think!" Seth said defensively, feeling a bit resentful that his own father would even suggest such a thought.
"I'm not worried about you dishonoring Gabby." Leo's reply surprised him, "I trust that you would never put her in a position to take advantage of her!"
Seth was puzzled as he asked, "Then why this talk?"
"I'm worried," Leo replied, "that you would cause her to dishonor herself with desires that, due to your commitment to abstinence, she cannot have fulfilled! I can only encourage you to be careful with where you spend solitude with Gabby."
"We're going to have those feelings anyway, Father. It's what you yourself even told me not too long ago!" Seth stated firmly.
"Yes, that is true. But, to put her in temptation's way by being out of sight of the family will make it harder for her – and for you – to resist." Leo implored.
Seth sighed and then nodded, "I understand. Didn't really think about that; I've been so mindful of me and how I am around her that I didn't think about Gabby's reaction."
"Seth, she's gone through a horrific experience." Leo explained, "You need to be mindful that Jason was her first sexual encounter and it was horrific."
He saw his son glower at the mention of the boy's name. Leo responded gravely, "Look, it's a fact and you better accept it right now! The best thing for you to do is to work your anger out before the marriage takes place! Otherwise, Gabby will pick up on it and then that can put a wedge between you and her."
Leo looked sternly at his son before continuing softly, "Gabby will be looking and needing the strength that you possess to get her through this. Obviously, along the way, she will be having flashbacks and fears and nightmares. How you react to them will determine her recovery. You will be treading with her where Jason has already ventured. Extreme sensitivity on your part is not an option, but a necessity. As far as spending time alone with her like you did yesterday, be mindful that your wedding day is only a month from now. Be careful you do not frustrate her." his father said pointedly. "You, least of all, should not have to be told this!"
And that was the end of the discussion. Leo left the gym, allowing Seth to remain behind to ponder his words of instruction.
*****
"Rahab? Can I talk with you, please – if you have time?" Gabby asked as she watched her aunt come down the stairs.
"Sure, Gabby. Where'd you like to talk?" her aunt asked.
"Hmmm…my room, maybe?" the girl offered quietly.
Once they were in Gabby's room and sitting on the bed, Rahab asked, "So, what'd you want to talk about?"
Gabby was silent for a moment. She looked down at her hands that were resting in her lap. She blushed just a little.
Then, she said softly, "Seth… and … Jason."
"Ah, yes, I wondered if maybe there was going to be some ugly fallout about that. I've been wanting to talk with you about it but decided to wait until you came to me." Rahab was quiet for a moment, watching her niece and wondering how quickly to get into it.
Finally, after Gabby seemed to leave the floor open for discussion, Rahab offered, "Marriage is a wonderful relationship Gabby. You choose marriage, it doesn't choose you. Who you marry is a choice thing, usually, although in some countries and cultures the families choose the life-mate for their children. Seth chose you and you accepted! He loves you very much; you do know that don't you?"
Gabby nodded, but then she remarked, "But, I didn't choose – Jason!" and she started to cry.
Rahab held her tightly and said in a strangled whisper, trying to keep her own emotions under control, "Yes, I know that, honey. I'm so sorry about that. If any of us could change what happened to you we would. We'd take it upon ourselves, in fact. But, it did happen and you've been doing very well in coping."
"But I'm afraid … I-I'll reject Seth because of what Jason did!" Gabby wailed. She leaned heavily into Rahab for support, shuddering with each sob.
Her aunt sighed compassionately, "I'm sure he's aware of this fact, Gabby. Seth is far more intuitive than even his father; just to let you know. " Rahab paused as she tried to find the right words. Not ever having gone through what her niece did had her at a disadvantage. She was afraid of minimizing what Gabby had gone through; afraid she would miss a point and have that come back to haunt her.
All Rahab could say was, "I will tell you this much, intimacy with Seth will be far different than it was with Jason. Seth will not force himself on you. He will not insult you or dishonor you, threaten you, or hurt you. And if there's one thing I know about my son – when he's not trying to get over jet lag – is he's patient, very patient! In that he has taken after his father."
Rahab kissed Gabby's cheek affectionately. "Besides my dear – and take it from one who knows – ninja love is the best!" and she giggled, causing Gabby to hiccup as she giggled in return.
