Ranma ½ x-over w/ Love Hina
By Kensa
Disclaimer: Yup. Same as always. I do not own or make profit out of this. These Anime Series belong to their own genius owners.
Okay, I am doing this because there are so few of this around. Its my own take at this genre. I write as I feel fit to. Not everything is in order. My fic, not yours.* Nyah, Nah Nah Nah Naw!!!* So please R&R.
Love Ranma
Shinobu Maehara was currently cooking dinner. She had gotten off from school so she was back at the dorm doing her chores. She happily hummed as she made food for the Hinata residents. Thinking of her days events she went along her way, until she was interrupted by the phone ringing. When she found out that Haruka had called to tell them that she was calling a dorm meeting in 5 minutes Shinobu was puzzled. Finishing what she was doing she went about collecting the girls. First she went to the springs to call Kitsune and Naru. Then she called Su and Motoko.
Naru Narusegawa had been lounging in the hot springs. It had been a stressful day at school. And it was even more stressful at the prep school. To think that all her hard work was to fulfill a promise to go to Tokyo University. So, she had been relaxing away her worries away with a soak in the springs. Just laying back and looking at the sky. Nothing to worry over, as she watched the clouds pass overhead. Hearing a sound she had turned towards the noise and saw her best friend. Mitsune Konno about to join her in the springs. That was when Shinobu had called out to her and Kitsune that there was a dorm meeting in 5 minutes.
Mistune Konno, a senior in high school was currently undressing. She looked over her beautiful nude body as she thought about her love life. Why couldn't she find a lover. Was she not beautiful enough. Sighing she opened the doors to the hot springs and stepped out. She saw Naru already soaking, so she didn't mind talking to Naru while they bathed. She saw Naru turn towards her, but before she could greet Naru they were interrupted by Shinobu.
Both looked at each other before shrugging. Haruka must have something important to tell them. Sighing they go up and got ready to head to the meeting.
Kaolla Su was still doing her chores as she thought about her next invention. Folding clothes gave her and an idea of folding space into dimensional pockets. With that she was sure she could make her room a whole lot larger. Large enough to fit all her lab in. she was about to maniacally laugh like her favorite anime character Washu when Shinobu called her and told her about the meeting. Sighing she put down her clothes she was folding and went off to the common room.
Motoko Aoyama Heir to the Gods Cry School of Martial Arts was practicing her sword style on the roof. She was thinking of her home and her future as the School Master with each stroke. Repeatedly she slashed as she thought of her life. Over and over again, she slashed with her sword. Her strokes bringing her a step closer to mastering the Gods Cry School. Her musings were cut short as Shinobu called her to a dorm meeting downstairs. Stopping she caught her breath before she went down to see what was so important to interrupt her work out.
All the dorm residents were going to get the shock of their lives.
"I called all you residents here to tell you that you have a new apartment manager. It's my nephew Ranma Saotome" Haruka Urashima told the gathered Hinata Residents.
They were all there because Haruka had called earlier to say that there was going to be an apartment meeting in 5 minutes. So all 5 residents were gathered in the common room, surrounding Haruka and her male guest. His appearance was curious, but after Haruka's announcement all questions and then some were answered.
"Yo What's Up?" Ranma Saotome said to the gathered girls.
It was strange of how ranmas life had dramatically changed in two weeks. He had left Nermia wit his mothers consent. He was no longer engaged to the girls, or married to the Amazon. He was now moving on with his new life.
He had left Nermia to go to Hinata city where he had his grandmothers inn to manage. His mother had called his grandma to ask if he could sty there. Instead he was surprised to know that grandma had given him the inn to run. He had to meet his aunt who he had not seen in 12 years to tell her he was taking over her manager position.
So arriving at Hinata city, he first went to aunt Haruka's tea house. After reacquainting his self with here they got done to business. He showed her the legal papers that grandma had faxed over. Upon seeing them she called the Hinata apartments.
Now Ranma was in control of his life. He was going to manage a inn while he finished school. How good life was. He still remembered how it all started.
***Flash Back***
Ranma Saotome, Heir to the Anything Goes Marital Arts was currently thinking of the insanity of his life. To him it was becoming a daily activity. It was also, why he hated his life.
Remembering his life all the way to the current state it was in was extremely depressing. All his life it was bad. Leaving home at the age of 4 and living on the road with an abusive father was not an ideal childhood.
Constantly moving from here to there he never had any friends of such growing up. He didn't know how to act in society. He rarely had contact to the world. He lived in the backwoods of Japan, never meeting any one unless it was a dojo master or an upset victim of Genma Saotome's greed and thievery.
He grew up with Genma as his only roll model. Learning all he knew from him. All he did was martial arts. Ten years non-stop of improving himself in the arts to be the best there ever was.
His training journey sucked. He was in constant pain. Being beaten daily in the name of the Art. Starving so that his body would become stronger. Living like a thief, until he learned better.
He only got into trouble on the journey. Either from or for his father. His training methods all dangerous and insane to teach. Only the most sadistic murderers would ever employ such torture to a human as Genma did for training.
The culmination of the journey was one that would forever haunt his dreams as the blackest day of his life. A journey to china before he would complete his training. Sure a training grounds over pools of water for balance sounded alright. Until he fell in one that turned him into a girl when ever he was hit with cold water, and his father a panda. Of course Genma never knew how to speak or read Chinese to know that this training grounds were cursed.
Then all the shit hit the fan. The curse was the trigger to his current chaotic life. It was like painting a bulls eye on his back and a sign saying all weirdoes welcome. Like honey is to flies, Ranma was to nut jobs.
His life leading up to its current status. Rivals, Fiancées, family and a life that was seriously fucked up. Two years of being in one spot made it so that all weird shit knew where to find him. Two years of shit 24/ 7.
These days where hell for him. Never did he get any peace or quiet. Anything and everything happened constantly. Anyone and every one turning his life into hell.
He was ready to snap.
Ranma didn't know how he was going to snap though. Breaking down or going crazy. Both were likely and both had the same ending, death. He would either kill himself or kill everyone to get out of this shit.
Sighing to himself, Ranma went back into the house. He needed to get off the roof before he went further into depression. Besides it was time to go to bed.
Saying night to everyone he went to sleep.
Of course this being Ranma, he didn't get any rest.
Ranma was sleeping and dreaming of the past. The past when he was on the road. To be precise, a moment in time when he was happy on the road. It was when he was 10 years old.
He remembered when he was near Kyoto with his father when they had stopped at a local dojo. The dojo was a family sword fighting style. Although his father hated weapon users he took Ranma there because it would help Ranma learn to fight against sword users. Why he took Ranma there instead of a kendo school was because the Gods Cry school was known for its power with the sword. It also helped that during Genma's own training journey he had seen the master beaten by the Gods Cry sword master, which happened to be female.
So going to Kyoto Genma planned to leave the boy there for two weeks while he took a well earned vacation. The time there would help Ranma greatly in his path to mastering the arts. It would also give Genma enough time to experience the Kyoto red light district without the boy.
Genma and him arrived at the dojo only to be surprised to learn that the current master of the school had recently giving up the arts to wed . They learned that all school masters of the Gods Cry school were female and that upon being wed they had to give up the family art. The future master was a 9 year old girl was in training.
Genma not wanting his trip to the brothels be jeopardized gave Ranma over to the dojo to teach him the basics of the gods cry school arts. The Gods Cry school allowed Ranma because he was a cute kid. They liked the idea that a 10 year was training to be the best there ever was in martial arts. Besides the basics of the family wouldn't hurt to part with to an outsider. After all it was the mentality of the basics that made it gods cry. To outsiders it would be kendo basics. If they happened to figure that out, they learned that the thoughts behind the moves were the true Gods Cry teachings. So teaching a little kid that wouldn't hurt them.
So it was the time spent at the Gods Cry School that Ranma was currently dreaming about. He was happy there. They fed him, gave him a bed to sleep in, and even gave him clean clothes. He was in heaven.
The training was fun also. The sword fighting techniques were like kendo except for the way it was taught. But it was fun nonetheless.
But what made it fun was the little girl that trained there besides him at the school. She was pretty good for a girl. Event though was once her stick was gone she was easy to beat.
He spent time training. But he also learned about the Aoyama family history. He learned that the family was devil hunters and shrine priestess.
And all the time there he was side by side with the girl. It was probably due to the fact that he found someone else his age that was nearly as good a martial artists as him. Or that teasing the girl was fun.
At training he would often tease the girl by making a face that would lead the girl into giggling that would get her in trouble by not training. That in turn would make her mad at Ranma for getting her in trouble. At the end of training he would bolt out the door as the girl followed chasing him and yelling of how she was going to beat the stuffing out of him.
Two weeks of fun went too fast for him. His father came one day and said that he was leaving now. He never got to say good by to his friend Motoko-Chan.
He dreamt of all the times they had together. The days of training in the dojo or running around the dojo grounds chasing each other. He dreamt of the times he smiled at the girl holding a bokken. He dreamed of a friend he once had.
Splash!!
Sputtering water out of her mouth Ranma looked towards the house to see the fury fat panda jumping out of the second story window. It was her father waking her up the usual way. It was the beginning of another r day.
Snarling as her father landed Ranma leapt out of the pound to face her father. She wondered why her father even bothered to spar against her since saffron. He was no longer anywhere in her league.
Angry at her father for breaking up his pleasant dreams she decided to end the fight early. It was time to once again show her father the futility of his actions against her. It was also a great way to release stress. Pounding a fat panda was a great way to start the god awful day.
To the other occupants of the house it was another day. Nothing new was going to happen. Nothing good was coming their way. It was life as usual.
Kasumi was busy preparing breakfast like always. Humming a ditty that was soft and melodious. She ignored the fight outside. Her only thoughts were of her happily hanging clothes to dry on a sunny day.
To Soun Tendou it was another day to try and marry off his youngest daughter to his best friends son. It was a day to unite the schools and secure the anything goes legacy. So briefly stopping to clap three times and bow to a picture of his late wife he went downstairs to eat breakfast.
Nabiki Tendou was currently silently cursing martial artists in general. Did martial artist have no consideration for those that were trying to sleep. Giving up on trying to drown the noise of fighting out side with a pillow she reluctantly rose out of bed. She made a mental note to make Ranma pay for waking her up early.
Akane Tendou was currently in the bath. She was looking at the Japanese version of playboy while fingering herself. She kept repeating in her mind that she was not a pervert as she orgasms. Nope she was not a pervert that wanted nothing but to chain ranmas girl side to her bed and ravaging her for a week, nope definitely not a pervert.
Ranma danced between her fathers attacks like he was Akane when she tried to spar with Ranma. She aimed for vital areas of the pandas body so that she could end the fight before breakfast was ready. She continued to punish the pandas body with well aimed strikes as she sensed everyone in the house hold begin their days. He couldn't help to note that Akane was giving off major lust vibes and excitement waves in the bath.
The fat panda was in trouble. Genma had decided that boy was getting lax in his training so he took it upon his self to show the boy the error of his ways. Of course it didn't go as planned.
Once he landed to start attacking the boy while he was in the pond he got the beating of his life humiliation wise. He didn't land a single punch as the red head girl weaved between his attacks. Each ten misses of his resulted in one hard punch to a vital area of his body. So far only minutes into the fight he hurt like never before.
His body was complaining of the mauling. His most sensitive areas as a martial artist were repeatedly tagged to inflict more trauma. Never had he been beaten like this before. Even the master never was this sadistic. And to top matters off it looked like the boy did not even try. The boy just had on a calm expression as he weaved and struck during the fight.
Suddenly this unfocused gaze leapt to the girls face only to be replaced instantly with a look of surprise. The panda leapt at the chance to hit his errant offspring. It was a move that was halted with extreme pain.
Surprised at what Akane's aura was telling him he almost didn't see the panda attack. Ranma focused instantly on the fight. He needed to finish off the panda first before he thought about his fiancés actions.
As a panda paw swiped at Ranma's head he caught it and held it in one place.
The pandas eyes widened in surprise before it almost popped out when Ranma continued on with her actions. He held the panda in place with its arm restricted and upper cut the stomach of the panda. The panda whimpered as tears sprung in its eyes. She followed up with a quick 500 hit chestnut fist combo to the fat fools solar plexus.
The pandas brain screamed with terror as it realized it was being murdered. Its body crying with pain that was not meant for mortal bodies. The world of Genma Saotome feel deeper into pain as Ranma decided to finish with flair.
Ranma having enough of the massacre decided to end his fight with style. He had recently went to the arcade with a few friends from school so watching Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat being played he reenacted some moves. Besides it just added insult to injury to the panda.
So doing a move that made him wince with sympathy she dropped to the ground in a split. Doing so made his arm was lift from the pandas belly, which caused the pandas body support to vanish making its body lean backwards from the previous punches. As the panda fell backwards Ranma screamed out with cheerfulness, " FINISH HIM!!!"
The panda hurt like never before. The hits on its solar plexus nearly caused the panda to blackout. But it kept conscious as its body began to fall backwards. Feeling the sensation of falling it thought that the beating had ended, so it began to relax.
But, upon hearing its offspring yell out an attack followed by a loud crunch it felt pain beyond comprehension. The pandas brain short circuited as the final blow was delivered. Before unconscious claimed the panda from ultimate pain it silently cried out with question on how Ranma could hit him there.
His balls where going to be hurting for the following weeks.
As she called out her attack Ranma couldn't help but to enjoy her attack. A strong quick punch to the pandas nether regions resulted in a loud sickening crunch. Leaving her hand in position she bowed her head. Her pose mimicking Jonny Cage of Mortal Kombat.
The rest of the house hold except Akane had entered the dinning room so they witnessed the ending of the sparring match. They were surprised with the fights conclusion. Horror at ranmas brutal finishing move and sympathy at Genma's ending where the only feelings of the group. They watched on with as Ranma continued to pose as the body of Genma fell in the background.
Kasumi had just been finishing the food so she went to call the others for breakfast. She was surprised to see her father already at his usual spot. She then turned towards the door only to find Nabiki already on the last step. Blinking she decided to get the Akane before she got the two fighters. About to move towards the door she was halted by a yell from Ranma outside followed by the sound of an impact. Turning towards the yell she saw Ranma on the ground with a fist extended towards the groin of the panda. From her studies of the human body she winced as she remembered that it hurt males when hit in that area.
Soun was sitting down at the table waiting for his meal. He ignored the sound of the beating behind him. Thinking that Genma was going easy on Ranma he had ignored the fight as boring. As he opened up his newspaper to read he saw his two oldest daughters. Kasumi was looking towards Nabiki, and Nabiki was looking at the two combatants. He looked down towards his paper when he suddenly heard Ranma yell out. Since the fight was silent earlier except for the pounding of flesh he turned towards the fight. The sight he saw would haunt him for the rest of his days. He saw his oldest and dearest friend being hit in the family jewels with a loud crunch. Horrified he looked at Ranma, who had his head down towards the ground and fist extended. His mouth gaping wide open he turned back to his friend to see him falling backwards.
Nabiki was coming down the steps when she heard the sounds of a scuffle in the yard. Interested at the happenings she looked out side. When she was awoken earlier, she had heard the window breaking and a body splashing in the pound. She wondered why there where not the usual sounds of Ranma yelling at his father. So looking out she saw Ranma finishing up his chestnut fist against his father. She was about to turn towards the table when she saw Ranma drop on the ground doing a spilt. Then she heard him yell out, finish him, as a fist lashed out towards the pandas groin. Instantly she knew what he did was a game move, and was surprised and slightly horrified at what she saw. She grew green at the impact sounded with a crunch.
Akane was still in the bath as the events downstairs unfolded. She would say she didn't hear anything as she was washing her hair. But in reality she had ducked her head in the water to muffle her scream as she climaxed in ecstasy from masturbating.
Ranma with her head still hung low had to think that the finishing move she did was just plain silly. Silly, but it was from a game. As it wasn't a real martial arts move, she knew that it was a insult to Genma to be knocked out like that. As she realized this she couldn't help but to giggle at the dark humor.
"Hee. Hee. Hee. Hee!!!"
Hearing the giggling from Ranma snapped all the spectators from their stunned gazes. The giggles made by her sounded quite scary. Especially since she was still in her pose. It frightened the audience for some unknown reason.
Finishing her inner musings Ranma started to get up. She had worked up quite an appetite looking good. Raising her head she saw most of the tendous looking t her with apprehension. Releasing that even Nabiki was looking cautious at her, she decided to have fun with them. After all was she entitled to fun as every one else was.
Narrowing her eyes towards them she was satisfied by all their unconscious step back. Ranma smiled evilly at them as she addressed them. A twinkling gleam in her eyes made her words more powerful.
"Oh my. You weren't supposed to see that. I think I have to punish you!"
After saying so she looked towards each spectator. She looked from Soun to kasumi then Nabiki. At each person she communicated a silent message.
As she looked towards Soun her eyes darkened considerably. At such a gaze Soun broke down blubbering in fear. He saw eyes that said he was next.
Kasumi saw that gaze focused at her. She was about to faint from the intense stare when she saw the silent message flash in his eyes. It was with warmth and amusement. Instantly she realized he was kidding around. Before she could read any father into her eyes, Ranma turned on Nabiki.
As the gaze settled on Nabiki she felt the hair on the back of her neck raise with fear. His eyes where mad and shinning, her smile turning her heart cold with terror. Ranmas eyes said that it was time for payback.
Seeing the various reactions from the tendous Ranma could barely hold in his laugh. Soun and Nabiki where scared shitless. Kasumi, bless her soul, didn't take him seriously. In fact she already forgot what he did to Genma.
Deciding that enough was enough he turned towards kasumi and asked if breakfast was ready.
"Kasumi-Chan is breakfast ready?"
"Yes, it is Ranma-kun."
At his question kasumi focused back on the morning meal. It was surprising how he acted this morning. But as long as he was still ok like his eyes told her then all was still well.
At the question, Soun stopped blubbering with a sudden hop. Dreading his fate he totally ignored what was said to start crying. He was thinking that Ranma had snapped and gone crazy and was going to kill him like he did Genma.
Nabiki almost jumped when she heard Ranma speak. She then realized what he said. Upon Kasumi's reply she confirmed what she heard Ranma say. He was still Ranma. Unconsciously she relaxed her body, and silently berated her self for jumping to conclusions about Ranma. She had thought that he had finally snapped.
As the previous tense mode passed kasumi, Nabiki, and Ranma all sat down for breakfast. Soun was still blubbering. Seeing that things where back to normal, kasumi began to small talk with Nabiki. Akane was holding up breakfast, so they had to pass time somehow. As kasumi and Nabiki talked, Ranma entertained himself with watching Soun and listening to Nabs and Kas-Chan's conversation.
The morning had so far been fun. Ranma had beat his father badly. He humiliated his father with his insulting finishing move from a game. He had scared Nabiki. Made Soun blubber in fear for once in return. Kasumi was nice as ever. Nobody questioned him about his actions so far. All and all, it was peaceful.
Minutes later Akane came to breakfast. She was bubbling with excitement. She was still effected from masturbating. So all her previous stress was released. Most of her anger came from her sexual frustration and confusing sexual preference.
Upon coming to the table she saw Nabiki and kasumi talking about this and that. Her father was blubbering. Ranma was busy watching her father and listening to her sisters talk. It was the usual morning.
Sitting down she prepared for the day. Breakfast to start off the day. Pleasant conversation with her sisters would start her day off well enough.
"Ohaiyo!"
"Morning, Sis." Nabiki non-chantly replied.
"Ohaiyo, Imouto-Chan" Kasumi cheerfully replied.
"Yo" Ranma passively replied. Glad she was here, because they could start breakfast.
As Akane joined the table, kasumi started to serve the family its meal. She was glad to start off the day by having breakfast with her family. Smiling at each of them she continued on with breakfast. That was until she saw her father still blubbering.
"Father, your breakfast is getting cold."
As kasumi finished saying those words Soun snapped out of his crying with surprise. Why had kasumi said his breakfast was getting cold. He had thought Ranma was going to kill every one. Remembering what Ranma did he turned towards the pigtailed youth. He saw Ranma eating wit his usual gusto.
Turning towards kasumi with confusion he accepted his meal. He was wondering why Ranma was acting normal. He then turned to look at his friend. He was greeted by an empty space where Genma usually sat. turning he saw Genma still out cold in the backyard.
Turning back at Ranma, he saw the boy still eating. Not sure of what he saw, he turned towards his panda friend and back to Ranma. He did this several times as he still hadn't figured out what was going on.
" Father what's wrong?"
Kasumi had still been watching her father as he stopped crying. He had taken his food dazedly. That was concern enough to keep watching him. She saw him look at Ranma and Genma with confusion written clearly on his face.
Upon hearing kasumi ask what was wrong with their father Akane, and Nabiki had stopped eating. They looked up to see what was wrong with their father. They saw what kasumi saw, their father was looking at both Saotome's in confusion.
Ranma just continued to eat peacefully. He didn't have to worry about the furry thief so he eat semi slow. He was focused solely on eating a meal without his father interfering. He missed what was going on at the table.
"Kasumi, why is Ranma eating and Genma still out side. I thought Ranma was going to kill us all?"
"Silly father. Ranma would not do such a thing. What gives you that idea?"
"Well, Ranma looked scary as he killed his father. I thought he went crazy."
"Oh, My! Daddy, Ranma just knocked his father out like usual. Nothings wrong with that."
Listening to the conversation the younger Tendou sisters looked on. Both their minds began to think different thoughts as they continued to listen to the conversation. Akane was beginning to think dark thoughts of her fiancé. Her mind had jumped to conclusion as she heard the words kill in them. Nabiki on the other hand began to wonder about the morning happenings.
"Ranma, why did you hit your father in the groin?" Soun asked Ranma seriously.
Ranma was busy eating peacefully. It was something he rarely did, so he was enjoyment to the fullest. When he heard Soun interrupt him he threw a glare at him as he replied.
"He looked at me weird. Do I have to have a good reason to hit that furry fool?"
"Waaahhh! Ranma looked at me scarily. My son in law is gonna kill me like he did his father. Waaahhhhh!!!"
"Saotome, why did you hit your father like that any ways?"
"Ranmaaaa…" growled the dyke "… why did you make daddy cry?"
The reactions where as expected when Soun asked Ranma about his actions earlier. Ranma knew what was going to happen when they asked the predictable questions. Seeing as the morning was going to go all down hill from there on out he decided to shake things up. Why should he let them step all over him. He was tired of this shit. It was time that it all ended.
***End Flash Back***
He remembered that day two weeks ago. He was just now relizing how important that day was. He was here now because of his actions that day. And he couldn't be any happier.
Of course since Ranma was happy that meant that others weren't. it was just how his life was. And it proved no exception even as he was in a new city.
"WWWHHAAATTTTT!!!"
All the girls screamed at once. This happening was scandalous. How could some guy manage their apartments. Event though he was cute, it was not right for a guy to run an all girls dorm.
"yeah. Granny Hina sent him copy's of the house deed and legal papers of his new title as house manager."
Haruka knew that the girls were going to react this way. She didn't blame them, but she also didn't blame her nephew. After talking wit him she agreed with granny's choice.
When her sister Nodoka had called her and said that her nephew was going ot se her she was surprised. She had not heard from Nodoka in years. Hell, she hadn't even seen Ranma her nephew in over a decade. So when Ranma arrived to see her today she had talked to him about his life.
She wondered why granny would do something like this. Even for her it was a bit extreme. Why would granny do some thing that would upset the Hinata residents. Especially when she cared for them as they were all her daughters.
When Ranma told her of his life she was pissed. Of course one couldn't tell as her face remained passive as she puffed on her cigarette. To think that her nephew who was only 17 went though so much shit in his life. She had found out why granny did as she did.
Granny wanted to give something to Ranma. Something that meant a lot to him. What better than responsibility that included his own job, house, and life. To Ranma, he probably never got anything but trouble.
So now granny gave something to him that did not require his sweat, and blood. He was to be the manager until e did not want to be anymore. He had free rein to do as he pleased wit the dorm. He could do as he pleased for the fist time in his life.
So now she was going to sit back and relax. She was going to enjoy the show that was sure to follow. She couldn't wait to see how the girls reacted to Ranma, and how Ranma would retaliate. It would be very amusing indeed.
Okay. YAYYY!!! I got that finished. It just popped up in my mind. It probably will continue. Slowly. Hmm. Okay I think that it will almost follow Love Hina Manga. I did this all in one night. It took four hours to come up with and type out. Hope it cool and all.
Lets see how Ranma reacts in a new environment with a new attitude. At least that's what I'm aiming for. Heh.
Um, since I am going to be writing more I hope that all stories are well received. And please read & review. If you like my stories and want to add it to your sites or link it, let me know kay? And my "X" crossover and AMG/Ranma x-over are slowly coming along. But most likely they will not be posted up on Fanfiction.net. I will release it to a chosen few. Heh.
And as the sun settles in the west and the night brings dreams, eternal desires leave me awake and restless enough to write this:
"SUCKERS!!!" (I'm going to sleep. So screw you. Night. Zzzzzz.)
By Kensa
Disclaimer: Yup. Same as always. I do not own or make profit out of this. These Anime Series belong to their own genius owners.
Okay, I am doing this because there are so few of this around. Its my own take at this genre. I write as I feel fit to. Not everything is in order. My fic, not yours.* Nyah, Nah Nah Nah Naw!!!* So please R&R.
Love Ranma
Shinobu Maehara was currently cooking dinner. She had gotten off from school so she was back at the dorm doing her chores. She happily hummed as she made food for the Hinata residents. Thinking of her days events she went along her way, until she was interrupted by the phone ringing. When she found out that Haruka had called to tell them that she was calling a dorm meeting in 5 minutes Shinobu was puzzled. Finishing what she was doing she went about collecting the girls. First she went to the springs to call Kitsune and Naru. Then she called Su and Motoko.
Naru Narusegawa had been lounging in the hot springs. It had been a stressful day at school. And it was even more stressful at the prep school. To think that all her hard work was to fulfill a promise to go to Tokyo University. So, she had been relaxing away her worries away with a soak in the springs. Just laying back and looking at the sky. Nothing to worry over, as she watched the clouds pass overhead. Hearing a sound she had turned towards the noise and saw her best friend. Mitsune Konno about to join her in the springs. That was when Shinobu had called out to her and Kitsune that there was a dorm meeting in 5 minutes.
Mistune Konno, a senior in high school was currently undressing. She looked over her beautiful nude body as she thought about her love life. Why couldn't she find a lover. Was she not beautiful enough. Sighing she opened the doors to the hot springs and stepped out. She saw Naru already soaking, so she didn't mind talking to Naru while they bathed. She saw Naru turn towards her, but before she could greet Naru they were interrupted by Shinobu.
Both looked at each other before shrugging. Haruka must have something important to tell them. Sighing they go up and got ready to head to the meeting.
Kaolla Su was still doing her chores as she thought about her next invention. Folding clothes gave her and an idea of folding space into dimensional pockets. With that she was sure she could make her room a whole lot larger. Large enough to fit all her lab in. she was about to maniacally laugh like her favorite anime character Washu when Shinobu called her and told her about the meeting. Sighing she put down her clothes she was folding and went off to the common room.
Motoko Aoyama Heir to the Gods Cry School of Martial Arts was practicing her sword style on the roof. She was thinking of her home and her future as the School Master with each stroke. Repeatedly she slashed as she thought of her life. Over and over again, she slashed with her sword. Her strokes bringing her a step closer to mastering the Gods Cry School. Her musings were cut short as Shinobu called her to a dorm meeting downstairs. Stopping she caught her breath before she went down to see what was so important to interrupt her work out.
All the dorm residents were going to get the shock of their lives.
"I called all you residents here to tell you that you have a new apartment manager. It's my nephew Ranma Saotome" Haruka Urashima told the gathered Hinata Residents.
They were all there because Haruka had called earlier to say that there was going to be an apartment meeting in 5 minutes. So all 5 residents were gathered in the common room, surrounding Haruka and her male guest. His appearance was curious, but after Haruka's announcement all questions and then some were answered.
"Yo What's Up?" Ranma Saotome said to the gathered girls.
It was strange of how ranmas life had dramatically changed in two weeks. He had left Nermia wit his mothers consent. He was no longer engaged to the girls, or married to the Amazon. He was now moving on with his new life.
He had left Nermia to go to Hinata city where he had his grandmothers inn to manage. His mother had called his grandma to ask if he could sty there. Instead he was surprised to know that grandma had given him the inn to run. He had to meet his aunt who he had not seen in 12 years to tell her he was taking over her manager position.
So arriving at Hinata city, he first went to aunt Haruka's tea house. After reacquainting his self with here they got done to business. He showed her the legal papers that grandma had faxed over. Upon seeing them she called the Hinata apartments.
Now Ranma was in control of his life. He was going to manage a inn while he finished school. How good life was. He still remembered how it all started.
***Flash Back***
Ranma Saotome, Heir to the Anything Goes Marital Arts was currently thinking of the insanity of his life. To him it was becoming a daily activity. It was also, why he hated his life.
Remembering his life all the way to the current state it was in was extremely depressing. All his life it was bad. Leaving home at the age of 4 and living on the road with an abusive father was not an ideal childhood.
Constantly moving from here to there he never had any friends of such growing up. He didn't know how to act in society. He rarely had contact to the world. He lived in the backwoods of Japan, never meeting any one unless it was a dojo master or an upset victim of Genma Saotome's greed and thievery.
He grew up with Genma as his only roll model. Learning all he knew from him. All he did was martial arts. Ten years non-stop of improving himself in the arts to be the best there ever was.
His training journey sucked. He was in constant pain. Being beaten daily in the name of the Art. Starving so that his body would become stronger. Living like a thief, until he learned better.
He only got into trouble on the journey. Either from or for his father. His training methods all dangerous and insane to teach. Only the most sadistic murderers would ever employ such torture to a human as Genma did for training.
The culmination of the journey was one that would forever haunt his dreams as the blackest day of his life. A journey to china before he would complete his training. Sure a training grounds over pools of water for balance sounded alright. Until he fell in one that turned him into a girl when ever he was hit with cold water, and his father a panda. Of course Genma never knew how to speak or read Chinese to know that this training grounds were cursed.
Then all the shit hit the fan. The curse was the trigger to his current chaotic life. It was like painting a bulls eye on his back and a sign saying all weirdoes welcome. Like honey is to flies, Ranma was to nut jobs.
His life leading up to its current status. Rivals, Fiancées, family and a life that was seriously fucked up. Two years of being in one spot made it so that all weird shit knew where to find him. Two years of shit 24/ 7.
These days where hell for him. Never did he get any peace or quiet. Anything and everything happened constantly. Anyone and every one turning his life into hell.
He was ready to snap.
Ranma didn't know how he was going to snap though. Breaking down or going crazy. Both were likely and both had the same ending, death. He would either kill himself or kill everyone to get out of this shit.
Sighing to himself, Ranma went back into the house. He needed to get off the roof before he went further into depression. Besides it was time to go to bed.
Saying night to everyone he went to sleep.
Of course this being Ranma, he didn't get any rest.
Ranma was sleeping and dreaming of the past. The past when he was on the road. To be precise, a moment in time when he was happy on the road. It was when he was 10 years old.
He remembered when he was near Kyoto with his father when they had stopped at a local dojo. The dojo was a family sword fighting style. Although his father hated weapon users he took Ranma there because it would help Ranma learn to fight against sword users. Why he took Ranma there instead of a kendo school was because the Gods Cry school was known for its power with the sword. It also helped that during Genma's own training journey he had seen the master beaten by the Gods Cry sword master, which happened to be female.
So going to Kyoto Genma planned to leave the boy there for two weeks while he took a well earned vacation. The time there would help Ranma greatly in his path to mastering the arts. It would also give Genma enough time to experience the Kyoto red light district without the boy.
Genma and him arrived at the dojo only to be surprised to learn that the current master of the school had recently giving up the arts to wed . They learned that all school masters of the Gods Cry school were female and that upon being wed they had to give up the family art. The future master was a 9 year old girl was in training.
Genma not wanting his trip to the brothels be jeopardized gave Ranma over to the dojo to teach him the basics of the gods cry school arts. The Gods Cry school allowed Ranma because he was a cute kid. They liked the idea that a 10 year was training to be the best there ever was in martial arts. Besides the basics of the family wouldn't hurt to part with to an outsider. After all it was the mentality of the basics that made it gods cry. To outsiders it would be kendo basics. If they happened to figure that out, they learned that the thoughts behind the moves were the true Gods Cry teachings. So teaching a little kid that wouldn't hurt them.
So it was the time spent at the Gods Cry School that Ranma was currently dreaming about. He was happy there. They fed him, gave him a bed to sleep in, and even gave him clean clothes. He was in heaven.
The training was fun also. The sword fighting techniques were like kendo except for the way it was taught. But it was fun nonetheless.
But what made it fun was the little girl that trained there besides him at the school. She was pretty good for a girl. Event though was once her stick was gone she was easy to beat.
He spent time training. But he also learned about the Aoyama family history. He learned that the family was devil hunters and shrine priestess.
And all the time there he was side by side with the girl. It was probably due to the fact that he found someone else his age that was nearly as good a martial artists as him. Or that teasing the girl was fun.
At training he would often tease the girl by making a face that would lead the girl into giggling that would get her in trouble by not training. That in turn would make her mad at Ranma for getting her in trouble. At the end of training he would bolt out the door as the girl followed chasing him and yelling of how she was going to beat the stuffing out of him.
Two weeks of fun went too fast for him. His father came one day and said that he was leaving now. He never got to say good by to his friend Motoko-Chan.
He dreamt of all the times they had together. The days of training in the dojo or running around the dojo grounds chasing each other. He dreamt of the times he smiled at the girl holding a bokken. He dreamed of a friend he once had.
Splash!!
Sputtering water out of her mouth Ranma looked towards the house to see the fury fat panda jumping out of the second story window. It was her father waking her up the usual way. It was the beginning of another r day.
Snarling as her father landed Ranma leapt out of the pound to face her father. She wondered why her father even bothered to spar against her since saffron. He was no longer anywhere in her league.
Angry at her father for breaking up his pleasant dreams she decided to end the fight early. It was time to once again show her father the futility of his actions against her. It was also a great way to release stress. Pounding a fat panda was a great way to start the god awful day.
To the other occupants of the house it was another day. Nothing new was going to happen. Nothing good was coming their way. It was life as usual.
Kasumi was busy preparing breakfast like always. Humming a ditty that was soft and melodious. She ignored the fight outside. Her only thoughts were of her happily hanging clothes to dry on a sunny day.
To Soun Tendou it was another day to try and marry off his youngest daughter to his best friends son. It was a day to unite the schools and secure the anything goes legacy. So briefly stopping to clap three times and bow to a picture of his late wife he went downstairs to eat breakfast.
Nabiki Tendou was currently silently cursing martial artists in general. Did martial artist have no consideration for those that were trying to sleep. Giving up on trying to drown the noise of fighting out side with a pillow she reluctantly rose out of bed. She made a mental note to make Ranma pay for waking her up early.
Akane Tendou was currently in the bath. She was looking at the Japanese version of playboy while fingering herself. She kept repeating in her mind that she was not a pervert as she orgasms. Nope she was not a pervert that wanted nothing but to chain ranmas girl side to her bed and ravaging her for a week, nope definitely not a pervert.
Ranma danced between her fathers attacks like he was Akane when she tried to spar with Ranma. She aimed for vital areas of the pandas body so that she could end the fight before breakfast was ready. She continued to punish the pandas body with well aimed strikes as she sensed everyone in the house hold begin their days. He couldn't help to note that Akane was giving off major lust vibes and excitement waves in the bath.
The fat panda was in trouble. Genma had decided that boy was getting lax in his training so he took it upon his self to show the boy the error of his ways. Of course it didn't go as planned.
Once he landed to start attacking the boy while he was in the pond he got the beating of his life humiliation wise. He didn't land a single punch as the red head girl weaved between his attacks. Each ten misses of his resulted in one hard punch to a vital area of his body. So far only minutes into the fight he hurt like never before.
His body was complaining of the mauling. His most sensitive areas as a martial artist were repeatedly tagged to inflict more trauma. Never had he been beaten like this before. Even the master never was this sadistic. And to top matters off it looked like the boy did not even try. The boy just had on a calm expression as he weaved and struck during the fight.
Suddenly this unfocused gaze leapt to the girls face only to be replaced instantly with a look of surprise. The panda leapt at the chance to hit his errant offspring. It was a move that was halted with extreme pain.
Surprised at what Akane's aura was telling him he almost didn't see the panda attack. Ranma focused instantly on the fight. He needed to finish off the panda first before he thought about his fiancés actions.
As a panda paw swiped at Ranma's head he caught it and held it in one place.
The pandas eyes widened in surprise before it almost popped out when Ranma continued on with her actions. He held the panda in place with its arm restricted and upper cut the stomach of the panda. The panda whimpered as tears sprung in its eyes. She followed up with a quick 500 hit chestnut fist combo to the fat fools solar plexus.
The pandas brain screamed with terror as it realized it was being murdered. Its body crying with pain that was not meant for mortal bodies. The world of Genma Saotome feel deeper into pain as Ranma decided to finish with flair.
Ranma having enough of the massacre decided to end his fight with style. He had recently went to the arcade with a few friends from school so watching Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat being played he reenacted some moves. Besides it just added insult to injury to the panda.
So doing a move that made him wince with sympathy she dropped to the ground in a split. Doing so made his arm was lift from the pandas belly, which caused the pandas body support to vanish making its body lean backwards from the previous punches. As the panda fell backwards Ranma screamed out with cheerfulness, " FINISH HIM!!!"
The panda hurt like never before. The hits on its solar plexus nearly caused the panda to blackout. But it kept conscious as its body began to fall backwards. Feeling the sensation of falling it thought that the beating had ended, so it began to relax.
But, upon hearing its offspring yell out an attack followed by a loud crunch it felt pain beyond comprehension. The pandas brain short circuited as the final blow was delivered. Before unconscious claimed the panda from ultimate pain it silently cried out with question on how Ranma could hit him there.
His balls where going to be hurting for the following weeks.
As she called out her attack Ranma couldn't help but to enjoy her attack. A strong quick punch to the pandas nether regions resulted in a loud sickening crunch. Leaving her hand in position she bowed her head. Her pose mimicking Jonny Cage of Mortal Kombat.
The rest of the house hold except Akane had entered the dinning room so they witnessed the ending of the sparring match. They were surprised with the fights conclusion. Horror at ranmas brutal finishing move and sympathy at Genma's ending where the only feelings of the group. They watched on with as Ranma continued to pose as the body of Genma fell in the background.
Kasumi had just been finishing the food so she went to call the others for breakfast. She was surprised to see her father already at his usual spot. She then turned towards the door only to find Nabiki already on the last step. Blinking she decided to get the Akane before she got the two fighters. About to move towards the door she was halted by a yell from Ranma outside followed by the sound of an impact. Turning towards the yell she saw Ranma on the ground with a fist extended towards the groin of the panda. From her studies of the human body she winced as she remembered that it hurt males when hit in that area.
Soun was sitting down at the table waiting for his meal. He ignored the sound of the beating behind him. Thinking that Genma was going easy on Ranma he had ignored the fight as boring. As he opened up his newspaper to read he saw his two oldest daughters. Kasumi was looking towards Nabiki, and Nabiki was looking at the two combatants. He looked down towards his paper when he suddenly heard Ranma yell out. Since the fight was silent earlier except for the pounding of flesh he turned towards the fight. The sight he saw would haunt him for the rest of his days. He saw his oldest and dearest friend being hit in the family jewels with a loud crunch. Horrified he looked at Ranma, who had his head down towards the ground and fist extended. His mouth gaping wide open he turned back to his friend to see him falling backwards.
Nabiki was coming down the steps when she heard the sounds of a scuffle in the yard. Interested at the happenings she looked out side. When she was awoken earlier, she had heard the window breaking and a body splashing in the pound. She wondered why there where not the usual sounds of Ranma yelling at his father. So looking out she saw Ranma finishing up his chestnut fist against his father. She was about to turn towards the table when she saw Ranma drop on the ground doing a spilt. Then she heard him yell out, finish him, as a fist lashed out towards the pandas groin. Instantly she knew what he did was a game move, and was surprised and slightly horrified at what she saw. She grew green at the impact sounded with a crunch.
Akane was still in the bath as the events downstairs unfolded. She would say she didn't hear anything as she was washing her hair. But in reality she had ducked her head in the water to muffle her scream as she climaxed in ecstasy from masturbating.
Ranma with her head still hung low had to think that the finishing move she did was just plain silly. Silly, but it was from a game. As it wasn't a real martial arts move, she knew that it was a insult to Genma to be knocked out like that. As she realized this she couldn't help but to giggle at the dark humor.
"Hee. Hee. Hee. Hee!!!"
Hearing the giggling from Ranma snapped all the spectators from their stunned gazes. The giggles made by her sounded quite scary. Especially since she was still in her pose. It frightened the audience for some unknown reason.
Finishing her inner musings Ranma started to get up. She had worked up quite an appetite looking good. Raising her head she saw most of the tendous looking t her with apprehension. Releasing that even Nabiki was looking cautious at her, she decided to have fun with them. After all was she entitled to fun as every one else was.
Narrowing her eyes towards them she was satisfied by all their unconscious step back. Ranma smiled evilly at them as she addressed them. A twinkling gleam in her eyes made her words more powerful.
"Oh my. You weren't supposed to see that. I think I have to punish you!"
After saying so she looked towards each spectator. She looked from Soun to kasumi then Nabiki. At each person she communicated a silent message.
As she looked towards Soun her eyes darkened considerably. At such a gaze Soun broke down blubbering in fear. He saw eyes that said he was next.
Kasumi saw that gaze focused at her. She was about to faint from the intense stare when she saw the silent message flash in his eyes. It was with warmth and amusement. Instantly she realized he was kidding around. Before she could read any father into her eyes, Ranma turned on Nabiki.
As the gaze settled on Nabiki she felt the hair on the back of her neck raise with fear. His eyes where mad and shinning, her smile turning her heart cold with terror. Ranmas eyes said that it was time for payback.
Seeing the various reactions from the tendous Ranma could barely hold in his laugh. Soun and Nabiki where scared shitless. Kasumi, bless her soul, didn't take him seriously. In fact she already forgot what he did to Genma.
Deciding that enough was enough he turned towards kasumi and asked if breakfast was ready.
"Kasumi-Chan is breakfast ready?"
"Yes, it is Ranma-kun."
At his question kasumi focused back on the morning meal. It was surprising how he acted this morning. But as long as he was still ok like his eyes told her then all was still well.
At the question, Soun stopped blubbering with a sudden hop. Dreading his fate he totally ignored what was said to start crying. He was thinking that Ranma had snapped and gone crazy and was going to kill him like he did Genma.
Nabiki almost jumped when she heard Ranma speak. She then realized what he said. Upon Kasumi's reply she confirmed what she heard Ranma say. He was still Ranma. Unconsciously she relaxed her body, and silently berated her self for jumping to conclusions about Ranma. She had thought that he had finally snapped.
As the previous tense mode passed kasumi, Nabiki, and Ranma all sat down for breakfast. Soun was still blubbering. Seeing that things where back to normal, kasumi began to small talk with Nabiki. Akane was holding up breakfast, so they had to pass time somehow. As kasumi and Nabiki talked, Ranma entertained himself with watching Soun and listening to Nabs and Kas-Chan's conversation.
The morning had so far been fun. Ranma had beat his father badly. He humiliated his father with his insulting finishing move from a game. He had scared Nabiki. Made Soun blubber in fear for once in return. Kasumi was nice as ever. Nobody questioned him about his actions so far. All and all, it was peaceful.
Minutes later Akane came to breakfast. She was bubbling with excitement. She was still effected from masturbating. So all her previous stress was released. Most of her anger came from her sexual frustration and confusing sexual preference.
Upon coming to the table she saw Nabiki and kasumi talking about this and that. Her father was blubbering. Ranma was busy watching her father and listening to her sisters talk. It was the usual morning.
Sitting down she prepared for the day. Breakfast to start off the day. Pleasant conversation with her sisters would start her day off well enough.
"Ohaiyo!"
"Morning, Sis." Nabiki non-chantly replied.
"Ohaiyo, Imouto-Chan" Kasumi cheerfully replied.
"Yo" Ranma passively replied. Glad she was here, because they could start breakfast.
As Akane joined the table, kasumi started to serve the family its meal. She was glad to start off the day by having breakfast with her family. Smiling at each of them she continued on with breakfast. That was until she saw her father still blubbering.
"Father, your breakfast is getting cold."
As kasumi finished saying those words Soun snapped out of his crying with surprise. Why had kasumi said his breakfast was getting cold. He had thought Ranma was going to kill every one. Remembering what Ranma did he turned towards the pigtailed youth. He saw Ranma eating wit his usual gusto.
Turning towards kasumi with confusion he accepted his meal. He was wondering why Ranma was acting normal. He then turned to look at his friend. He was greeted by an empty space where Genma usually sat. turning he saw Genma still out cold in the backyard.
Turning back at Ranma, he saw the boy still eating. Not sure of what he saw, he turned towards his panda friend and back to Ranma. He did this several times as he still hadn't figured out what was going on.
" Father what's wrong?"
Kasumi had still been watching her father as he stopped crying. He had taken his food dazedly. That was concern enough to keep watching him. She saw him look at Ranma and Genma with confusion written clearly on his face.
Upon hearing kasumi ask what was wrong with their father Akane, and Nabiki had stopped eating. They looked up to see what was wrong with their father. They saw what kasumi saw, their father was looking at both Saotome's in confusion.
Ranma just continued to eat peacefully. He didn't have to worry about the furry thief so he eat semi slow. He was focused solely on eating a meal without his father interfering. He missed what was going on at the table.
"Kasumi, why is Ranma eating and Genma still out side. I thought Ranma was going to kill us all?"
"Silly father. Ranma would not do such a thing. What gives you that idea?"
"Well, Ranma looked scary as he killed his father. I thought he went crazy."
"Oh, My! Daddy, Ranma just knocked his father out like usual. Nothings wrong with that."
Listening to the conversation the younger Tendou sisters looked on. Both their minds began to think different thoughts as they continued to listen to the conversation. Akane was beginning to think dark thoughts of her fiancé. Her mind had jumped to conclusion as she heard the words kill in them. Nabiki on the other hand began to wonder about the morning happenings.
"Ranma, why did you hit your father in the groin?" Soun asked Ranma seriously.
Ranma was busy eating peacefully. It was something he rarely did, so he was enjoyment to the fullest. When he heard Soun interrupt him he threw a glare at him as he replied.
"He looked at me weird. Do I have to have a good reason to hit that furry fool?"
"Waaahhh! Ranma looked at me scarily. My son in law is gonna kill me like he did his father. Waaahhhhh!!!"
"Saotome, why did you hit your father like that any ways?"
"Ranmaaaa…" growled the dyke "… why did you make daddy cry?"
The reactions where as expected when Soun asked Ranma about his actions earlier. Ranma knew what was going to happen when they asked the predictable questions. Seeing as the morning was going to go all down hill from there on out he decided to shake things up. Why should he let them step all over him. He was tired of this shit. It was time that it all ended.
***End Flash Back***
He remembered that day two weeks ago. He was just now relizing how important that day was. He was here now because of his actions that day. And he couldn't be any happier.
Of course since Ranma was happy that meant that others weren't. it was just how his life was. And it proved no exception even as he was in a new city.
"WWWHHAAATTTTT!!!"
All the girls screamed at once. This happening was scandalous. How could some guy manage their apartments. Event though he was cute, it was not right for a guy to run an all girls dorm.
"yeah. Granny Hina sent him copy's of the house deed and legal papers of his new title as house manager."
Haruka knew that the girls were going to react this way. She didn't blame them, but she also didn't blame her nephew. After talking wit him she agreed with granny's choice.
When her sister Nodoka had called her and said that her nephew was going ot se her she was surprised. She had not heard from Nodoka in years. Hell, she hadn't even seen Ranma her nephew in over a decade. So when Ranma arrived to see her today she had talked to him about his life.
She wondered why granny would do something like this. Even for her it was a bit extreme. Why would granny do some thing that would upset the Hinata residents. Especially when she cared for them as they were all her daughters.
When Ranma told her of his life she was pissed. Of course one couldn't tell as her face remained passive as she puffed on her cigarette. To think that her nephew who was only 17 went though so much shit in his life. She had found out why granny did as she did.
Granny wanted to give something to Ranma. Something that meant a lot to him. What better than responsibility that included his own job, house, and life. To Ranma, he probably never got anything but trouble.
So now granny gave something to him that did not require his sweat, and blood. He was to be the manager until e did not want to be anymore. He had free rein to do as he pleased wit the dorm. He could do as he pleased for the fist time in his life.
So now she was going to sit back and relax. She was going to enjoy the show that was sure to follow. She couldn't wait to see how the girls reacted to Ranma, and how Ranma would retaliate. It would be very amusing indeed.
Okay. YAYYY!!! I got that finished. It just popped up in my mind. It probably will continue. Slowly. Hmm. Okay I think that it will almost follow Love Hina Manga. I did this all in one night. It took four hours to come up with and type out. Hope it cool and all.
Lets see how Ranma reacts in a new environment with a new attitude. At least that's what I'm aiming for. Heh.
Um, since I am going to be writing more I hope that all stories are well received. And please read & review. If you like my stories and want to add it to your sites or link it, let me know kay? And my "X" crossover and AMG/Ranma x-over are slowly coming along. But most likely they will not be posted up on Fanfiction.net. I will release it to a chosen few. Heh.
And as the sun settles in the west and the night brings dreams, eternal desires leave me awake and restless enough to write this:
"SUCKERS!!!" (I'm going to sleep. So screw you. Night. Zzzzzz.)
