A/N: HI!! I'm back!!! W/ more of course. Well, I realli hope u guys like it and I hope to get some reviews in the future.... *hint* *hint* haha, well read and review!!

chap. 3 ~ medevial times
Duo awoke to find himself on the ground, and his body felt ten times heavier than it normally would. He stood up and heard a clink-clank of metal and looked at his surroundings to find Heero, Wufei, Trowa, and Quatre lying on the ground as well, all wearing ridiculous-looking medevial armor. He started to laugh histerically at the sight of his friends in armor, which was enough to wake up the rest of the pilots.
"Damn it... my head," Wufei grunted as he sat upright. He glanced up at Duo and retorted, "Maxwell, what is that obscene metal you're wearing?"
Duo glanced down at himself only to notice that he was wearing the "ridiculous-looking" armor as well. "Shit, this does not work with my hair," Duo said, realizing for the first time the helmet on his head. Heero began to stir, and as soon as he regained consciousness he said, "Duo, as soon as we get back, that's two months of no bed time." Duo began to pout, but Heero didn't deter as he stood up noisily kicked Quatre in the side so he would wake up.
Quatre let out a grunt as he sat up and said, "You didn't have to kick me Heero..." Quatre then got up and gently shook Trowa so he would wake up. In a couple of minutes, all five Gundam pilots were awake and well, all dressed in full-blown knight armor.
"Why the hell am I dressed in this damn piece of metal?" Heero asked grumpily. The four other pilots could only shake their heads in confusement.
"I blame Maxwell on this one," Wufei retorted, "If he had been a little less thick, maybe we all wouldn't be in this mess." As he said those words, a miniature, bright pink fairy flew up to the five pilots.
"Welcome thou noble knights! Thou have entered the realm of thy Kingdom of Eekhoorns*," the fairy proclaimed in a squeaky voice.
Duo gave the fairy a blank look as Trowa said, "The fairy thing said, 'Welcome noble knights. You have entered the Kingdom Of Squirrels'...in Dutch."
"Again, we're SUPPOSED to be in Ireland, why do people speak in DUTCH?!" Duo commented.
"Thou hast not in thy land thee calls Ireland. Thou in thy Kingdom of Eekhoorns. Thou has entered thy kingdom and thee hast been commenced with a quest! A noble quest, a quest darker than thy darkest shadows. Befallen upon thee is thy death!!" The fairy squeaked and continued to fly around, an annoying fly irritating the pilots, er... knights.
"You need a translation Maxwell?" Wufei snorted irritably, waving his hands to ward off the fairy. Quatre shook his head, and Heero continued to glare at the fairy.
"So what the hell are we supposed to do on this 'quest'?" Heero said, apparently not in the mood for manners.
"Thou must save thy beautiful princess and bestow upon her true love's first kiss!" the fairy said indubitably.
"HOHO! We've all got boyfriends here, so Wu-man you'll do the honors when we get there..." Duo said cheerily. Wufei scowled and muttered something about women being weak.
"Where exactly are we going to find this princess?" Trowa asked impatiently.
"I will be thy guide for three days and three nights. After that, thee must find the rest of thy way." The fairy finished. Trowa nodded and got up.
"Hell no, I am not walking all that way to where ever this princess is, in this bloody armor. UH UH no way!" Duo said.
The fairy giggled, "Thee ist so humerous. Of course not! Thee hast thy noble steeed." She pointed and following her finger the five knights saw five horses, each horse individualized for each knight. Duo's horse was indoubtfully black, Heero's horse a dark brown, matching his hair. Trowa's steed was a chesnut brown, Quatre's, a light blonde, and Wufei's horse was a shimmering silver.
"OOoo, we get horses..." Duo was obviously in awe as he walked up to the black horse. Trowa, Heero, Wufei, and Quatre, who had all had experience with horses at one point and time in their life, got onto their horses gracefully as Duo clanked up to his horse and in an attempt to sit on his horse, he fell over and off the saddle, two feet from where he had originally stood. Wufei snorted and Heero got off his horse to help Duo onto his. After a long time, the impatient fairy cried, "Off we go on thy quest so noble and daring!" And so the five knights rode, into the sunset, stomachs growling with fierce hunger. ~~~~~~~~~~~~
An hour or two on horseback, our noble heroes reached a black forest, ridden with mysterious beasts and uncanny creatures. Each knight racked with hunger, tired to the bone, and horses sagging under the knights weight.
"Damn, my ass is killing me," Duo complained in a whine.
The fairy giggled, "Thou hast not complain, thee is reaching thy destination for today. Then we shall rest for thy first part of thy journey is completed."
Quatre rolled his eyes, tired of medevial talk (in fact, I'm tired of medevial talk and I'm going to be TALKING in medevial talk when I'm done with this fic...), and as much as he hated to admit it, "your ass really does ache after awhile," Quatre thought. Heero, the perfect soldier (well, now that we're in fairy tale land, I guess he's the perfect knight, ne?) sat straight up, refusing to give into sleep and hunger.
"I say we find FOOD," Duo whined for the millionth time that day.
"SHUT UP," cried the fairy in rage.
"Hey hey! Even patient fairies can't stand Duo, this proves my point and in turn, it proves my theory," Wufei proclaimed victoriously.
The fairy blushed crimsom and cleared her throat, "Ahem... Thou hast reached thy destination, thee may now find thy dinner and set up thy camp. I will be back for thou in thy morning." With that, she flew off into the dark red horizon.
"Great..." Duo mumbled as he fell off his horse in an attempt to climb down from it. The horse, no longer standing his heavy rider, slumped down on the ground, falling asleep immediately.
The remaining knights collapsed on the ground, armor clinking. Duo proceeded to try and take off his armor, and found he could take off most of it.
"Hey, you think I can shoot something for dinner?" Duo asked as he stood up and reached for his gun, only to find that it wasn't there. "Hey, where's my gun?!" Duo began tearing at his clothing, hoping to uncover at least one of his guns or knives. Heero looked down at his gun's holster, finding that none of his numerous guns and various knives were there. Wufei looked down at his waist, discovering that his precious katana was replaced with a huge cold steel sword.
"I suppose we could hunt with these..." Wufei unsheathed the sword and immediately fell over at the immense weight of it. None of the other knights had any other weapon except for a sword as well, and each knight looked at eachother, hoping that at least one of them would have an idea as to how to hunt for dinner with it.
"Damn..." Trowa muttered as he dragged his sword behind him.
Quatre calmly stated, "I say we all scatter and find some food... all of us, except for Duo, haven't eaten since YESTERDAY and are really damn hungry." Everyone nodded in agreement and each knight barely lifted their sword off the ground as they went into five different parts of the woods.
Another hour later and Duo came back with absolutely nothing, Quatre had two squirrels, Trowa had five squirrels, Wufei had hunted three squirrels, and Heero bested them all by killing eight squirrels. All in all, they had a total of eighteen "roasted over the spit-fire" squirrels, cooked medium-rare and ready to eat.
"I say Duo gets the least food, since he ate a damn well breakfast AND got us into this mess AND he didn't contribute at all to the squirrel pile," Wufei said, smirking.
"Apparently all this 'land' has to offer is squirrels," Trowa stated blandly.
"Does that mean we're gonna have to fight monstrous, human-eating squirrels?" Duo said sarcastically. Actually, the way Duo said it, he was more 30% sarcastic and 70% serious. "And I'm really hungry, please, please pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?? Heero tell them I can eat!" Duo began to pout at a consistant rate. Heero began to open his mouth to say something, but Duo pushed his lips onto Heero's, holding the passionate kiss for a long time. Duo broke away and stared at Heero with puppy eyes. Heero sighed and smiled as he gave Duo his share of the squirrels. Wufei looked utterly disgusted as Quatre and Trowa followed Duo and Heero's lead and started kissing passionately over their dinner.
"Okay people, STOP. Not while I'm eating. Do this when I'm not here, and do this when we're not in the middle of some alternate universe where pink fairies tell us where to go and what to do. Do this when we're back home, doing actual life-threatening, realistic missions that make sense!" Scolding turned into rambling as Wufei continued down his list. Duo, Heero, Trowa, and Quatre stared at Wufei for a couple of seconds before returning to what they were doing before they were so rudely interrupted.
After dinner, the fire dimmed and embers glowed as our five heroes settled down to sleep, thoughts on home and reality. ~~~~~~~~~~~~
A rooster cackled out of nowhere and Duo sat upright as the rooster continued to sing. "Damn thing, I thought there were only squirrels in this land..." Duo thought obscurely as he moved to wake up Heero and the others. Everyone had just woken from their slumber when they saw a speck of pink trail towards them.
"Great, the fairy from hell is back," Wufei mumbled sleepily. Quatre chuckled at Wufei's comment, but stopped and grew more serious as the fairy reached them.
"Good day, noble knights! How was thou slumber? Fit for a knight, I pray?" Without waiting for an answer, she turned and shouted, "We parry onward!" Five knights groaned as they hoisted themselves upon their steeds (horses grumbling on the inside as well, for their masters were getting incredibly heavier each day).
"Um, fairy... Why don't we have guns?" Duo asked stupidly out of the blue.
"What is thy object thee speaks of? In thy Kingdom of Eekhoorns no modern object is contained within thy walls," the fairy proclaimed. Duo grunted in irritation.
The sun shadowed the forest, and only speckles of sunlight could be seen through the thick canopy of leaves. The clip-clop of the horse's hooves was the only sound to be heard as the knights rode in silence.
"STOP! In front of thee is thy magic lamp, for if thee rubs it, thy will get three wishes! Make haste, for we have little time!" The energetic fairy squeaked. Everyone looked at Duo as if saying, "You got us into this mess, now get us out." Duo rolled his eyes and sighed as he fell of his horse again. Placed on a stone table was a gold lamp and Duo cautiously walked back to his friends, holding the lamp as if it were made of glass. "Rub thy lamp, noble knight and wish for a raw T-Bone steak and neon lights. The last wish is for thee to claim." the fairy said.
Duo looked at his companions questioning the ridiculous items the fairy told him to wish for. Heero said slowly, "We should do as she says, for she lives in these lands and knows the quest." Duo nodded as he rubbed the lamp and a blue, ghostly genie appeared before him.
"Good master, I am to serve you!" the genie cried. "Now this guy I like," Duo thought happily.
"Umm... I wish for a raw T-bone steak and neon lights..." Duo said slowly, "But.. uh, I haven't decided on my last wish yet." The genie nodded and before Duo appeared a T-bone steak, wrapped carefully in white paper and a neon light sign. "Sheesh, this land has neon lights and not guns? What was all that modern object crap?" Duo thought tiredly. The genie then handed Duo a slip of paper, upon which had the words, "REDEEM FOR ONE WISH. EXPIRES WITHIN TWO WEEKS."
Duo looked up at the genie and said, "Raincheck?" The genie nodded and spiraled back into the lamp, which disappeared.
Duo smiled happily at his fellow knights and clambered back on his horse, which neighed in exhastion at the addtional weight of the neon sign and the T-bone steak. ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Finally exiting the forest, the knights came across a tunnel, made of solid rock and granite. "Through the tunnel courageous knights, forthwith we venture!" the now annoying fairy screamed. Within the cave, there was not a speck of light to be seen (well, I guess since it's so dark you can't see anything, then it only makes sense that you can't see light... whoa, that just made no sense...). The echoing of the horses hooves drove Duo mad as he yelled, "Hey look it's my echo!" Responding to his cry came, what other than, his echo: "Hey look it's my echo... my echo...my echo...." Apparently amused Duo continued, "Damn this trip and it's corniness, oh, and damn Wufei for everything." Wufei scowled as his name rung in the caverns of the tunnel. "Damn Wufei for everything... everything... everything...."
A loud squeak emitted from nowhere and everyone presumed it was the fairy. "What's wrong fairy? Why are you squeaking?" Quatre asked, trying to make this quest a little more interesting.
The fairy replied, "Nay, 'twas not me, befallen upon us is thy dark, evil vampire." As the words left her mouth, a huge bat swooped down on Duo, attempting to bite his neck or gorge his eyes out.
Heero looked at Duo fight off the bat as he yelled at no one in particular, "No one bites Duo's neck but me!" Blood rushed to Heero's face as he said those words and Duo was flattered for a moment, but kept warding off the bat. "Omae o korusu," Heero mumbled.
"Thy neon lights dear knight! Turn them on and cast away thy terror!" The fairy cried. The bat abandoned Duo and flew to face the front of the company. Growing bigger and taller, fur on its face diminished and a white, pale face with protruding pearl fangs appeared. Its cape clothed the thin shoulders and its greasy black hair almost shimmered, for it was the brightest thing in the cave.
Seizing the moment, Duo found the on/off switch on the lights and turned it on, bright, yellow gold words screaming at the vampire, alternantly flashing the message, "EAT AT JOE'S." The vampire screamed at retreated to the inner depths of the cave, with Wufei muttering about the stupid phrase written on the sign. Duo smiled triumpantly as he turned the sign to face him. He read the message and looked at the fairy with a puzzled look. "Eat at Joe's? Eat at Joe's? What am I, a walking advertisement?" he asked. The fairy shrugged and flew onward to the exit of the cave.
Light poured on the knights' faces as they stepped into the sunshine. Hopefully this living hell would be over with soon... ~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hehe, what happens next? Will the G-boys find their way out of this medevial time? All these questions will be answered in the next chapter, all I'm asking for is... you guessed it! REVIEWS!!!!!

*That really is the Dutch word for squirrels, pretty kooky, huh? I dedicate the whole squirrel section to one of my dear friends... Although, she'll probably hunt me down and kill me for that... haha... ~~~~~~~~~~~~