Disclaimer: I do not own: a) Pirates of the Caribbean b) Lord of the Rings c) the Caribbean d) the actors e) any word of this story. Who can own a word anyway?

RingPirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Rum

Chapter 1 Mist and Shadow and Cool Stuff like That

Pipey music sounds. People go "oooooh oooh"

A ship sails out of mist and shadow and cool stuff like that. Suddenly a

voice is heard...

"We pilfer we plunder we don't give a hoot, drink up me hearties yo ho. Yo ho yo ho... AAAAH!!"

Elizabeth Baggins, 2'11'' jumps as a hand slaps down on her back. Mr. Gimli Gibbs is standing there.

"Aragorn" he says "let's find some food."

Elizabeth blinks. "Mr. Gibbs, wrong movie."

"Oh, right. Ahem. Shut up, kid. There are evil guys around. Ringpirates. They'll stab you. Like a suckling pig. I like pig. It's tasty..."

Footsteps sound. "I'll let you tell the kid to shut up, Gimli Gibbs."

This tall man with long brown hair, a tricorn hat, leather trenchcoat and stockings shows signs of mental illness.

A scowl from the stocky man with a red beard. "She was singing about pirates."

"Obviously. On your way."

Gimli Gibbs shows signs of being an alcoholic. Oh dear, this is pleasant.

Elizabeth likes hearing about Ringpirates. "What's a ringpirate?" How naive a child.

"Vile and dissolute." Let's not use harsh language. "I'll kill them all. I'll burn them with a torch. Because I am Aragorn Norrington! All bow for me..."

Gandalf Swann, the guy obsessed with paths, objects. "Dude, take a chill pill."

Aragorn Norrington grudgingly acquiesces.

"I like hearing about ringpirates." Yeah, no one cares kid.

Gandalf doesn't. "Well, I don't."

Elizabeth strolls about the ship. Suddenly, she sees a parasol. Then she sees a boy. A boy with long blonde hair. Wow, how stylish.

"Omigod! There's a dude with blonde hair down there! God save the queen! Help him, help him, help him!!!!"

So some dudes jump in the water. They fish out the kid. Suddenly Gimli Gibbs swears violently. Everyone runs to the side. And there, there in the water, are boats. They're burning. BURN!!! HAHAHAHAA... oh, sorry, got carried away there.

"Get the boats out, you idiots!" Aragorn Norrington can be very vehement.

"Elizabeth!" Swann is impatient with the little girl. "Watch over the boy. Take care of him..."

Elizabeth nods. She's a very agreeable kid.

She goes over to the kid and pats him on the head...

"AAAH!" He grabs her hand. What a sped. Elizabeth notices his eyes are brown.

"It's okay. I'm Elizabeth Baggins." His eyes slowly fade to blue. Elizabeth likes his eyes...

"W-Will Greenleaf." Does he like her back?

" I'm watching over you, Will." What does she really want to say?

He faints. She looks him over. Suddenly she sees it: a bottle of rum.

"You're an-- alcoholic!"

"Has he said anything?" What is Aragorn Norrington doing here?

She jumps.

"His name's William Greenleaf. That's all I found out."

Norrington doesn't even care. He sends the kid below deck.

Later, in private, she examines the rum. She almost takes a sip. She's never drunk rum before. She wants to. She really does...

Suddenly she sees a ship. It looks really evil. Oh dear. It's scary. Elizabeth squeezes her eyes shut...

Do you like it? More later. Only for reviews. Good one. Story for reviews. Okay?