Author's Notes: Oh yeah. Double Update. I'm good. LOL Sorry I'm just so excited I got two chapters in today!! Yippie!!! Just please review!! That's all I ask of you!! Thank you soo much!!!
He signed off on his last chart, the shift that would never end finally over. He hadn't seen so many trauma's in months. And he had thought Africa to be exciting. Africa was exhilarating. Chicago was just hell. He headed toward the lounge, ready to grab his coat, and head home to a nice warm bed. He pushed the door open, and walked in on Luka, working on some charts, with Abby sleeping next to him, his arm around her, playing with the tips of her hair. He received a warm smile from him, but he couldn't return one. He was way too tired.
"Long day?"
He shook his head, walking toward his locker, trying not to look over at the scene.
"How long has she been on?"
He sort of played with, and eventually stressed the she. He was referring to Abby, since no one else was in the room, but it was strange.
"Long enough. She worked 36 hours straight."
He ran his hands through his hair, then pulled off his lab coat.
"The place has changed."
He heard a small laugh escape from Luka.
"Yeah. Everything's changed."
He hung his coat up, it seemed so strange to be wearing it after all that time in the Congo. He looked at Luka for a second.
"How long have you two, uhh...?"
He couldn't finish his sentences. This was absurd. He wasn't in love with her. He was with Kem. Kem was everything Abby would never be.
"A few weeks."
He nodded his head. What else was there to say?
"We just decided to give it another go . . . We weren't all that bad the first time . . . "
No. They weren't. They just never talked. He didn't understand her. She just ended up running to him every time something happened.
"She deserves someone . . . "
Luka looked up at him. They met gazes.
"Better? Than you?"
He looked at Luka questioningly.
"No. I didn't mean it that way."
He watched Luka look at Abby for a second, giving her a kiss on top of her head.
"You lost the best thing that could have ever happened to you."
He squinted his eyes. They were talking in whispers, trying not to wake her.
"No . . . We . . . we just didn't work out . . . I don't know . . . I never lost her . . . I'm happier than I have been in a long time. I have Kem. I'm going to be a father . . . "
He saw her petite figure shift and was lying in Luka's lap, her eyes fixed on Luka's. She was probably oblivious to the fact that he was even in there. She was looking up at him, a smile forming on her lips.
"What?"
He heard Luka mumble it, quietly, like a game.
He couldn't move. He just kept on watching. He was fixated to the floor. Her hand intertwined with his, the charts completed, and piled on the floor.
"I love you."
He watched Luka smile, replaying the statement back to her. Then he shifted his gaze onto him. He was still standing there. A look of disbelief etched upon his face. He had been with her for longer, known her for ages, tried and pushed, proposed, and nothing. And now, she was with Luka, and she was a completely different person, open with her feelings. He had never gotten anything from her more than a simple thank you. She must have realized someone was in there. She began to sit up, and she glanced at him.
"Hey."
She said it somewhat happily, relaxed.
"Hey."
One word answers were all he could probably reply with for the moment.
"Listen, I'm sorry for the way I acted earlier. But the mother and son would have died."
He nodded his head, as if telling her to disregard it.
"How are they?"
She was running her hand through her hair at the moment.
"They are both healthy, happy, and thankful."
Well she did disregard orders, push him into a corner, and performed an unauthorized procedure downstairs in the ER, no less.
"So it all worked out?"
She nodded her head, smiling.
"What about Cobourn? Did she give you a hard time?"
She laughed a little.
"Actually. No. She just told me to find a doctor that I hadn't slept with to run the procedure."
He looked at her, giving her this weird look. She just shrugged him off and collapsed back against Luka, he couldn't believe the way she was acting. Like she didn't care. Like she was completely oblivious to the fact that she was opening scars, and letting them bleed again. Yes, he was over her. No, he didn't still love her. But why was this so confusing. He wanted to see her happy. He had told her not to wait for him, that she was stronger on her own, that she never needed him. Well some of that must have been true, because she seems to finally be content with everything. Her life, her job, just everything. And here he was, heading in the same path. He had been happy in the Congo. But right now, it was a dull memory. Maybe it was because he didn't have to see her. Or because she wouldn't be able to hurt him again. Whatever it was, it was over. He had felt more pain with her, than without her. But now the pain was equal, maybe even more.
"I need to get going. I'll see you tomorrow."
He started to turn around, but stopped when he heard her call his name. She had gotten up, heading over to him, standing only a few inches away.
"I'm sorry for the way everything worked out between us, and how it ended . . . I just, I hope you're happy with her. You deserve someone who deserves you."
He nodded his head, he couldn't muster a smile, or a thank you, or anything. He just watched her go back to Luka, and attempt to pull him off the couch. A vague request that she wanted to go home. He walked out the door, feeling uncomfortable. He remembered so many stolen kisses, and quick hugs in that same room. He remembered telling her it would all be okay in there. He remembered calming her down, dealing with Erik. It was like an attack. And then her telling him, that she hoped that he was happy. She said it like she truly meant it. She wanted to see him with someone who loved him the same way he would her. Why couldn't they have just had a violent break-up where they both hated each other? Those seemed easier to get over than these lost and broken ones that seemed to lead no where, spiraling through hoops and dips. Leading no where and somewhere at the same time.
He signed off on his last chart, the shift that would never end finally over. He hadn't seen so many trauma's in months. And he had thought Africa to be exciting. Africa was exhilarating. Chicago was just hell. He headed toward the lounge, ready to grab his coat, and head home to a nice warm bed. He pushed the door open, and walked in on Luka, working on some charts, with Abby sleeping next to him, his arm around her, playing with the tips of her hair. He received a warm smile from him, but he couldn't return one. He was way too tired.
"Long day?"
He shook his head, walking toward his locker, trying not to look over at the scene.
"How long has she been on?"
He sort of played with, and eventually stressed the she. He was referring to Abby, since no one else was in the room, but it was strange.
"Long enough. She worked 36 hours straight."
He ran his hands through his hair, then pulled off his lab coat.
"The place has changed."
He heard a small laugh escape from Luka.
"Yeah. Everything's changed."
He hung his coat up, it seemed so strange to be wearing it after all that time in the Congo. He looked at Luka for a second.
"How long have you two, uhh...?"
He couldn't finish his sentences. This was absurd. He wasn't in love with her. He was with Kem. Kem was everything Abby would never be.
"A few weeks."
He nodded his head. What else was there to say?
"We just decided to give it another go . . . We weren't all that bad the first time . . . "
No. They weren't. They just never talked. He didn't understand her. She just ended up running to him every time something happened.
"She deserves someone . . . "
Luka looked up at him. They met gazes.
"Better? Than you?"
He looked at Luka questioningly.
"No. I didn't mean it that way."
He watched Luka look at Abby for a second, giving her a kiss on top of her head.
"You lost the best thing that could have ever happened to you."
He squinted his eyes. They were talking in whispers, trying not to wake her.
"No . . . We . . . we just didn't work out . . . I don't know . . . I never lost her . . . I'm happier than I have been in a long time. I have Kem. I'm going to be a father . . . "
He saw her petite figure shift and was lying in Luka's lap, her eyes fixed on Luka's. She was probably oblivious to the fact that he was even in there. She was looking up at him, a smile forming on her lips.
"What?"
He heard Luka mumble it, quietly, like a game.
He couldn't move. He just kept on watching. He was fixated to the floor. Her hand intertwined with his, the charts completed, and piled on the floor.
"I love you."
He watched Luka smile, replaying the statement back to her. Then he shifted his gaze onto him. He was still standing there. A look of disbelief etched upon his face. He had been with her for longer, known her for ages, tried and pushed, proposed, and nothing. And now, she was with Luka, and she was a completely different person, open with her feelings. He had never gotten anything from her more than a simple thank you. She must have realized someone was in there. She began to sit up, and she glanced at him.
"Hey."
She said it somewhat happily, relaxed.
"Hey."
One word answers were all he could probably reply with for the moment.
"Listen, I'm sorry for the way I acted earlier. But the mother and son would have died."
He nodded his head, as if telling her to disregard it.
"How are they?"
She was running her hand through her hair at the moment.
"They are both healthy, happy, and thankful."
Well she did disregard orders, push him into a corner, and performed an unauthorized procedure downstairs in the ER, no less.
"So it all worked out?"
She nodded her head, smiling.
"What about Cobourn? Did she give you a hard time?"
She laughed a little.
"Actually. No. She just told me to find a doctor that I hadn't slept with to run the procedure."
He looked at her, giving her this weird look. She just shrugged him off and collapsed back against Luka, he couldn't believe the way she was acting. Like she didn't care. Like she was completely oblivious to the fact that she was opening scars, and letting them bleed again. Yes, he was over her. No, he didn't still love her. But why was this so confusing. He wanted to see her happy. He had told her not to wait for him, that she was stronger on her own, that she never needed him. Well some of that must have been true, because she seems to finally be content with everything. Her life, her job, just everything. And here he was, heading in the same path. He had been happy in the Congo. But right now, it was a dull memory. Maybe it was because he didn't have to see her. Or because she wouldn't be able to hurt him again. Whatever it was, it was over. He had felt more pain with her, than without her. But now the pain was equal, maybe even more.
"I need to get going. I'll see you tomorrow."
He started to turn around, but stopped when he heard her call his name. She had gotten up, heading over to him, standing only a few inches away.
"I'm sorry for the way everything worked out between us, and how it ended . . . I just, I hope you're happy with her. You deserve someone who deserves you."
He nodded his head, he couldn't muster a smile, or a thank you, or anything. He just watched her go back to Luka, and attempt to pull him off the couch. A vague request that she wanted to go home. He walked out the door, feeling uncomfortable. He remembered so many stolen kisses, and quick hugs in that same room. He remembered telling her it would all be okay in there. He remembered calming her down, dealing with Erik. It was like an attack. And then her telling him, that she hoped that he was happy. She said it like she truly meant it. She wanted to see him with someone who loved him the same way he would her. Why couldn't they have just had a violent break-up where they both hated each other? Those seemed easier to get over than these lost and broken ones that seemed to lead no where, spiraling through hoops and dips. Leading no where and somewhere at the same time.
