AUTHORS NOTE ON 02/09/04:

This note got deleted, cause I used whole chapter for only this note.

Oh, and that anonymous person who reported me.. -__- You're not really a courageous person, are you? I honestly feel sorry for you.

Hey there, my readers! I'm sorry I haven't updated for the last.. what was it? Four months? T____T I've gotten into a major block. After I read over the last three chapters, I started questioning my writing skills and I've decided to write over everything! As soon as I get rid of this block I'll do everything and update.

I've already thought of the next two (and last) chapters and I know exactly what they're going to be about, but I just can't write the words down. A couple of you guys might know this problem.

Please stay patient with me, I'm after all just a teenage girl with too many problems to handle..
[A/N: I'M ALIVE! *grinnes like a maniac* Honestly, I'm so sorry I haven't updated for a while. I was so totally NOT into Yu-Gi-Oh. u.u *sighes* But now that they finally translated the last episodes of YGO, it somehow motivated me to go on. *smiles* It's so weird.. O.o I'm already used to call Malik (the hikari) Malik, but they changed it to 'Marik' instead. *sighes* And Isis is Ishizu.. . I'm confused..
But, oh well. Who cares anyways? He's a goddamn sexy bastard and that's all what counts. *grinnes* Please R&R!!!! It means so much to me! Responses to reviews:

SoulDreamer: O.O You reviewed twice! Thanks a lot! And thanks for the compliment! ^___^

M-python-girl: As you can see, there is more. *grinnes* Don't even think of me not finishing this! I'll end this! Promise!

DaughterofDeath: O.O Yes, Sir.

IronAndYukito: There's my first reviewer again.. *smiles* Please don't cry.. *pats you on the back* It makes me sad, too.. T.T  Oh, and thanks for the hints, but I planned something like that anyways. ^^ *smiles* Thanks for your sympathies. I know, that my grandma isn't dead.. there have been a few signs of it. She's always with us, protecting our family and helping us, when we need her. I know it sounds freaky, but it's true..

aibou_ryou: SORA-CHAN! *cuddles you* ^.^ I'm sorry I haven't brought him back in the second chapter.. *sighs* .. but I just wanted to keep this fic going. Thanks for those many compliments.. *blushes* I'm just trying my best. It's not easy to write in english, though. u.u You really ARE a close reader.. ^.~ But I won't be saying anything until it's time to do so. *smirks*

Misura: Thanks so much.. ;_;.. I tried so hard to make those flashbacks sweet and even a bit depressing.. Oh, and thanks for reviewing again. *smiles* It makes me happy to see that readers stay with me. *smiles*

FlikFreak: *smiles* Thanks, Flikkie.. *grinnes*

Mandii: *puts an arm around you* Don't cry.. please.. ;_; I can't promise anything.. though there's something in my head, alright? But just.. don't .. cry! PLEASE! .

Faia_Ookami: Oh, it's the wolf again. *grinnes* It's okay, I'm already better now. *smiles* After all, it's been a lot of years since then.

BlackMagicianGirl3: Thanks, thanks, thanks! ^_________^

LadyBlueEyes1: As you can see, I decided to take #2.. *grinnes* I guess, I'll use one of the others in the next chapter.. ^.^ v Thanks anyways!
IMPORTANT:
Just in case you didn't know.. I'm GERMAN! It's not so easy to write in english and I can't write in German and just translate it. The grammar is somewhat too different and it's hard, cause I don't have much experience in writing more graphic. But I'm trying my best.. .

I changed some mistakes again. *sighes* As I said, my english isn't the best. And I added something at the end of every chapter...

Something I totally forgot the past few chapters.. THE DISCLAIMER! u.u Of course, Yu-Gi-Oh isn't mine and neither are the songs I'm using. I'm not making any money or stuff with this. It's just there to enjoy people! .]

 
My Immortal
~*Flashback*~

"Kura-chan! Look, over there!" Ryou pointed out and smiled happily. The yami stood up from the bench he had been sitting on and walked over to his koi.

"What is it, little one..?" he asked curiously. He looked over to where Ryou was pointing at and saw two swans, swimming side by side. One was a bit smaller and more fragile than the other and both had soft white feathers.

"Aren't they cute?" The younger of the boys giggled and clasped his hands behind his back.  "Yeah.." Bakura muttered and moved behind him, wrapping his arms around the other's chest. He deeply inhaled Ryou's scent. It tastet like vanilla.

"Did you know that swans only have one partner in their whole life? If one dies, the other stays lonely until the end." Ryou leaned back against his lover. "Sad, isn't it?" he mused.

"Yeah, ..sad but fair." The brown-eyes yami said and lay his head on the younger one's shoulders. His lips moved slowly across Ryou's neck, where he blew several kisses on it. The hikari sighed softly and closed his eyes.

"Same with us." Bakura murmured. "Nothing will ever replace you. Nothing."

~*Flashback End*~
Bakura slowly opened his eyes a bit. Sunlight was coming from the nearby window and he slowly looked up. Ryou was standing next to the bed, staring down at him. A look of concern crossed his features.  Groaning the yami closed his eyes, only to open them widely again. He jumped.

"RYOU?!" His eyes darted through the room and he saw.. nothing. Slowly he sank back into the pillow. 'Just a.. dream.'

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all of my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

As the doorball rang he slowly got up again. Being tired and totally exhausted, Bakura nearly tripped over a shoe, which lay on the steps. He clenched his eyes shut, as painful memories flooded his mind. After a few seconds he slowly opened the door and looked at the person wo was standing there.

Deep purple eyes were staring up at him. The light blonde mane stood wildly from his head. The well-tanned boy looked at Bakura from head to toe and frowned. "You're dying inside.." me muttered.

With a soft sob, Bakura broke down into Marik's arms.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

"Are you feeling better now..?" Marik cautiously murmured and stroke Bakura's hair. They were sitting on the couch, Bakura's head resting on Marik's lap. The silver-haired didn't answer.

"I'll get that as a 'yes', right?" Marik grinned, trying to sound like his normal cheery, crazy self. He, too, was crying on the inside. He didn't like seeing his friend suffering like that. It tore him apart.

"You really don't look good, Bakura." he muttered, trying to hide the concern in his voice. "You're pale ..too pale.. and you look tired and totally exhausted. Everyone's worried and in pain, too. We all miss Ryou and..-"

"You aren't in real pain." Bakura hissed in a dead voice. "You don't know what real pain is. You haven't lost the one you ever truly loved. .. Who loved you the same.." His voice died out and the blonde flinched slightly.

"Yeah, you're right.. But we all lost a very dear friend.. and if you keep going on like this, we'll lose you, too." With those words, the purple-eyed slowly liftet Bakura's head off his lap.

You used to captivate me By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

"No! Wait!" As if on reflex the white-haired yami grabbed Marik's arm and held him by his side. "Don't go.. please.." he whispered desperately and almost.. scared.

The other one blinked at him and raised an eyebrow. Without saying any further, he pulled Bakura into a close hug and started stroking his back gently. He could hear him sniffling quietly.

'Why's everything going wrong? It's not been long after they finally confessed their feelings to each other, when Ryou died. Bakura was even starting to get along with the Pharao..' Marik sighed.

He frowned as the other pulled back and stared up at him. His once beautiful chocolate brown eyes were lifeless and bloodshed. Tears were still running down his pale cheeks. Then suddenly, Bakura leaned against him, their lips touching softly.

Marik froze.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

The next thing he knew was him lying on his back and Bakura on top of him, straddling his hips. The white-haired began to grind into him and pushed his tounge hungrily into Marik's mouth.

The other yami moaned deeply and his eyelids fluttered shut. Bakura's hands moved over his chest, as he leaned into the kiss and groaned lustful. With a quick flip, Marik turned them both over and stared down at him, panting heavily.

"Stop.. it.." His hands pressed Bakura's arms harder into the couch, as the brown-eyed squirmed slightly. "As much as I desire you.. don't do this. Not like that. You're only trying to replace Ryou by using me. Let's do this when we get him back. It'll be much more fun with him involved in this anyway."

Marik grinned down at the other, who looked ready to cry. "I.. I'm.. sorry.." Bakura stuttered and clenched his eyes shut.

"It hurts.. it hurts so much.. Make it stop, Marik. Please, just make this go away." He whimpered  and sobbed out loud. The blonde slowly got up and lifted Bakura on his arms, carrying him upstairs.

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

The tanned boy carefully lay Bakura on the bed, pulling the covers over him. Said yami curled up into a small ball and breathed in slightly.

'He's so tired.' Marik thought and sat down on a chair near the bed. 'We have to do something. He can't go on like this. It's.. eating him from the inside. He needs Ryou. Without him, he'll just.. die.' The blonde leaned back against the seat, letting his head fall back.

"What was I thinking? ~Let's do this when we get him back.~" He snorted softly. "Ryou's dead.. we can't just bring him back to life.. can we?"

A soft scent of vanilla flooded the room and Marik frowned.

'Maybe.. we can.'

~*Owari*~

"We numb our brains to stay alive
Whatever we have to do to survive
We cut ourselves and burn our skin
To punish ourselves and get rid of sin
We're looked upon as freaks and outcasts
But we're just trying to get rid of the past

To destroy the images and lies that we're told
That left us broken, messed up and cold
If you really listen and try to understand
Maybe I'll trust you and take your hand

Just listen to me when I need your ears
Give me your arms to huge away my fears
Help me rip out the crazy thoughts inside
Try to find the part of me that died
Help me to like myself again
Stick with me and be a true friend."

[A/N: *hides under her bed* O.O No.. don't! Please! PUT AWAY THAT KNIFE! T.T I just couldn't resist that scene with Bakura and Marik. I'm sorry I didn't bring Ryou back.. but I have to torment you for a while.. *smirkes* .. *freezes* O.O AH! PUT THAT DOWN! *runs away screaming*]