Disclaimer: I do not own J.K. Rowling's story or characters.
"Whew!" Hermione let out a huge sigh as motion was restored to our beloved (?) characters.
"Er," the author checked her watch. "I think its time for me to go."
Sirius looked as though someone had poked him in the eye! "What!?"
"Where b-b-b-loody 'ell are you going to go?" Sirius looked sad, for lack of a better adjective. Ron looked upset. Recently, everyone had been stealing his little phrase!!! (er. "bloody 'ell")
"Well. I can't really tell you. Classified information and all." But the author was no match for the two pairs of eyes that were fixed pleadingly on her. [why?] "Er.." Big green eyes and big dark eyes bored into her head. Yes, Harry and Sirius had so much skill at convincing people with their eyes that even the author fell for their charms. "I'm going back to my notebook. I have to write about you again before the whole universe implodes.. er.. Difficult to explain."
Hermione looked perplexed. "If you're here right now, who is writing the story?"
"It's writing itself.. That's why I have to leave for now.. or else PANDEMONIUM WILL ENSUE!" She kissed Sirius on the cheek and poked Harry in the scar.
"OWW! Quit doing that! Everyone!" Harry's green eyes glowed (quite literally) in fury.
"Good riddance," muttered Hermione. Ron agreed. The author vanished into thin air and all was back to normal. Sort of.
Sirius shook his head, and then lay down onto a hospital bed and began to count the dots on the ceiling (like godfather, like godson) causing several portals to open..
Harry started to do a jig. Ron sang a Jig Song.. However that goes.
Ron ran off all of a sudden to get his magical CD entitled "Jig Masterpieces! #2000054!".
When he left, Hermione poked Harry in the scar and took a deep breath.
"I lied, Harry." She had sad little tears in her eyes. "I'm not pregnant. I have a WEIGHT disorder!" she sobbed into Harry's hair.
Harry wielded his wand. "You're a witch, you know. You could just zap off all that extra weight" He zapped off her extra pounds and her crying subsided. It was replace with a look of fear.
"I was just kidding, Harry. You just killed my unborn offspring!" Hermione screamed and cackled miserably at the same time.
Harry backed away slowly. Hermione had a very, very weird sense of humour lately.
Ron was getting tired of all this bloody weirdness. To his personal request, the story has now been fixed. We are now back in the common room of Gryffindor, where quite normal conversations were taking place.
"So, do you enjoy snow-snorkelling?" asked Harry of Ron. However, Ron was far too busy staring at a very shiny, diamond-y ring that he held in his right hand. He was on the verge of telling the ring that it was his precious when his real precious, Hermione walked in.
"Hermy!" He shrieked and sat her down onto the couch next to him. "'Mione, I have a VERY serious question to ask you, so please set aside your temporary insanity for a moment." Hermione looked at him. He turned such a deep shade of red that it was verging on purple. "Er..Uh..Uhm.. Um..Well.. Hermione, will you do me the bloody honour of marrying me?"
Hermione shuddered. "Good god, Ron," she tilted her head. "No way."
Ron looked as though someone had taken his heart and stuck 100000000000000000000 of Fred and George's new-and-improved "Quadruple Extreme Dungbombs" inside of it, setting them off one at a time. (The quadruple extreme dungbombs had not finished testing yet. None of the test subjects had survived! (Luckily, Fred and George only tested such new and dangerous products on Muggles and, when they had the chance, death eaters.))
Hermione burst into peals of laughter. The whole of the Common Room seemed to convulse with her hysterical laughter! Ron began to cry. Hermione's laughter suddenly and alarmingly halted. Some readers may begin to wonder if Hermione's sanity had disappeared completely because of her disturbing OOCness!
Hermione picked Ron up from the floor (where he had been quite contentedly grovelling at her feet..) and cooed, "Of course I'll marry you. You bloody gullible sweet little dolt, you!"
Hermione had her back to Harry, who took this opportune moment to blast Hermione with a Sanity Restoring Spell!
"Sanitorium Restorium!" He winced at the pathetic-sounding incantation that the author had come up with.
Hermione fell to the floor. "Look what you did!" Ron whined, tears pouring out of his eyes, "You just ruined the happiest moment of my life!" Harry rolled his eyes.
"Actually, I saved the happiest moment of your life!" Harry gestured to Hermione, who slowly stood up.
"Oh my goodness.. I think.. I think I'm sane again." Hermione laughed one last maniacal laugh, that slowly faded away. "Oh.. thank god.." She fainted right into Ron's arms. Ron looked ecstatic.
By the next day, almost everything had returned to normal. Well except for Snape showing up to class in a pink tutu and doing the hula, and Dumbledore (yes, he returned from the dead) showing off his new nose ring, lip ring, and eyelid ring..
Yes, things were back to normal..
Or were they?
****************************************************************************
"Whew!" Hermione let out a huge sigh as motion was restored to our beloved (?) characters.
"Er," the author checked her watch. "I think its time for me to go."
Sirius looked as though someone had poked him in the eye! "What!?"
"Where b-b-b-loody 'ell are you going to go?" Sirius looked sad, for lack of a better adjective. Ron looked upset. Recently, everyone had been stealing his little phrase!!! (er. "bloody 'ell")
"Well. I can't really tell you. Classified information and all." But the author was no match for the two pairs of eyes that were fixed pleadingly on her. [why?] "Er.." Big green eyes and big dark eyes bored into her head. Yes, Harry and Sirius had so much skill at convincing people with their eyes that even the author fell for their charms. "I'm going back to my notebook. I have to write about you again before the whole universe implodes.. er.. Difficult to explain."
Hermione looked perplexed. "If you're here right now, who is writing the story?"
"It's writing itself.. That's why I have to leave for now.. or else PANDEMONIUM WILL ENSUE!" She kissed Sirius on the cheek and poked Harry in the scar.
"OWW! Quit doing that! Everyone!" Harry's green eyes glowed (quite literally) in fury.
"Good riddance," muttered Hermione. Ron agreed. The author vanished into thin air and all was back to normal. Sort of.
Sirius shook his head, and then lay down onto a hospital bed and began to count the dots on the ceiling (like godfather, like godson) causing several portals to open..
Harry started to do a jig. Ron sang a Jig Song.. However that goes.
Ron ran off all of a sudden to get his magical CD entitled "Jig Masterpieces! #2000054!".
When he left, Hermione poked Harry in the scar and took a deep breath.
"I lied, Harry." She had sad little tears in her eyes. "I'm not pregnant. I have a WEIGHT disorder!" she sobbed into Harry's hair.
Harry wielded his wand. "You're a witch, you know. You could just zap off all that extra weight" He zapped off her extra pounds and her crying subsided. It was replace with a look of fear.
"I was just kidding, Harry. You just killed my unborn offspring!" Hermione screamed and cackled miserably at the same time.
Harry backed away slowly. Hermione had a very, very weird sense of humour lately.
Ron was getting tired of all this bloody weirdness. To his personal request, the story has now been fixed. We are now back in the common room of Gryffindor, where quite normal conversations were taking place.
"So, do you enjoy snow-snorkelling?" asked Harry of Ron. However, Ron was far too busy staring at a very shiny, diamond-y ring that he held in his right hand. He was on the verge of telling the ring that it was his precious when his real precious, Hermione walked in.
"Hermy!" He shrieked and sat her down onto the couch next to him. "'Mione, I have a VERY serious question to ask you, so please set aside your temporary insanity for a moment." Hermione looked at him. He turned such a deep shade of red that it was verging on purple. "Er..Uh..Uhm.. Um..Well.. Hermione, will you do me the bloody honour of marrying me?"
Hermione shuddered. "Good god, Ron," she tilted her head. "No way."
Ron looked as though someone had taken his heart and stuck 100000000000000000000 of Fred and George's new-and-improved "Quadruple Extreme Dungbombs" inside of it, setting them off one at a time. (The quadruple extreme dungbombs had not finished testing yet. None of the test subjects had survived! (Luckily, Fred and George only tested such new and dangerous products on Muggles and, when they had the chance, death eaters.))
Hermione burst into peals of laughter. The whole of the Common Room seemed to convulse with her hysterical laughter! Ron began to cry. Hermione's laughter suddenly and alarmingly halted. Some readers may begin to wonder if Hermione's sanity had disappeared completely because of her disturbing OOCness!
Hermione picked Ron up from the floor (where he had been quite contentedly grovelling at her feet..) and cooed, "Of course I'll marry you. You bloody gullible sweet little dolt, you!"
Hermione had her back to Harry, who took this opportune moment to blast Hermione with a Sanity Restoring Spell!
"Sanitorium Restorium!" He winced at the pathetic-sounding incantation that the author had come up with.
Hermione fell to the floor. "Look what you did!" Ron whined, tears pouring out of his eyes, "You just ruined the happiest moment of my life!" Harry rolled his eyes.
"Actually, I saved the happiest moment of your life!" Harry gestured to Hermione, who slowly stood up.
"Oh my goodness.. I think.. I think I'm sane again." Hermione laughed one last maniacal laugh, that slowly faded away. "Oh.. thank god.." She fainted right into Ron's arms. Ron looked ecstatic.
By the next day, almost everything had returned to normal. Well except for Snape showing up to class in a pink tutu and doing the hula, and Dumbledore (yes, he returned from the dead) showing off his new nose ring, lip ring, and eyelid ring..
Yes, things were back to normal..
Or were they?
****************************************************************************
